CHAOS (Beneath The Secrets Book 1)
CHAOS: Chapter 55

Lara gave me a lift home and sent me hers and Nikolai’s number, just in case I needed them.

Which spikes my anxiety even further.

Pulling my feet up on the couch, I hold the steaming mug of coffee in front of my face.

I know Jax needs space. He made that clear as he left.

It’s a lot to wrap his head around, especially when he’s struggling with Kai’s death. I can’t imagine replaceing out what having a dead sibling will do.

But, I’m worried. It’s been hours. I won’t be able to sleep until I know he’s coming home.

I just want to be there for him, to help him through this.

Hovering my finger over his number, I hit dial and hold my breath. He might not want to speak to me. I just need to hear his voice. I’ll at least know where his head is at.

“Jax?” I whisper as soon as it connects. Relief courses through me that he’s not sending me straight to voicemail.

“Hi, sweetheart.”

I try to keep the panic out of my voice. “Are you okay?”

I can hear the loud shouting in the background.

“Yeah. I’m fine.” He pauses.

I pull my knees up to my chest and hug them before putting him on loud speaker.

“I’m so fucking sorry about earlier. I didn’t mean to push you away like that.” His words come out in a rush.

“I know you didn’t mean it like that. I’m just worried about you. Can you just come home, please?”

He doesn’t sound drunk, which is good.

“Yeah, baby. I want to come home. I went on a long ass ride to clear my head, and I feel better. Still want to punch Nikolai in the throat, though.”

I laugh. “I get that. You two need to talk.”

“Where are you now?”

“Just at some shitty biker bar. I’ve been nursing a pint for the last hour, just thinking.”

“And how is that working for you?”

The crowd in the bar seems to be getting louder. It’s hard to hear him.

“Yeah, I ended up thinking about asking you to marry me.”

I choke on a cough, making him chuckle. The sound of his laughter washes my worries away.

“You’re sure you aren’t drunk?” I tease.

He groans. “No, honestly. I’m trying to be better for you.”

“Well, it is Vegas, after all. Would be a shame not to.”

“You’d seriously still marry me, even after the shit I pulled today?”

I frown. “You did what you thought was right at the time for your own sanity, Jax. There is nothing wrong with that. It’s better than kicking in Nikolai’s head, in front of the kids.”

“True. Didn’t think of it like that.” There are sounds of shouting in the background. “I’ll give you something much better than a crappy Vegas chapel, Sof. I promise. Just you wait.”

Butterflies erupt in my stomach as I fiddle with my nails.

I really would marry this man, anywhere. I want him to be mine forever.

“Let’s just start with a proposal first?”

“I got you. Let me finish this drink and I’ll call Alexei, get him to pick me up and then, I’m going to crawl into bed with you and make up for today.”

“How are you doing that?” I blush as I say the words.

“I have a few tricks up my sleeve for you, baby.”

“I’ll wait up. Get your ass home, Mr. Carter. I miss you.”

“And, I love you, Sof. You are the best part of me.”

“I love you, too. I’ll see you soon.”

As we say our goodbyes and the call ends, it’s like a weight has been lifted. He hasn’t gone into self-destruct mode and he’s coming home to me.