Children of Chaos - Book 1
6th Chapter

“Would you?”

“For Asha? Anything.”

The walk down the mountain back to the lake was a long one. Mainly because you were so nervous. The thoughts running through your brain were driving you crazy. Aidan hadn’t looked at you once since the fire demon had left and you didn’t know if that was a good or a bad sign. Probably bad. The others were too cold, too tired to pay attention to anything but the way ahead, but once the lake came into view, once the temperatures increased that changed.

“What the hell happened up there?”

Of course, it was Emrys who spoke up first. He was quick to complain, and judging from his face he was also angry. At whom you weren’t sure. Maybe everyone, but probably you.

“I’d like to hear an answer to that as well”, Lynn said in a tone that was less hostile, but no less demanding than Emrys’.

You looked over at Aidan, unsure of what to do. For the first time since this journey had begun, you felt like you didn’t have control of the situation. You did not like it. You needed to get back in charge somehow. Technically you no longer needed Aidan. The first key was safely in the pouch around your neck. But it was too late to consider that option now. If he chose to speak up, there was nothing you could do about it. He looked back at you with an unreadable expression and then turned towards Lynn the others.

“I think it was some sort of test. I wasn’t affected because I’m a child of Esh and the guardian of the key was a fire demon. It was designed so only a child of Esh would be able to fend off the effects while everyone else fell into some sort of trance.”

Lynn and Emrys still looked skeptical, while Ethan nodded and Nami smiled.

“Does this mean we got the first key?”, Megumi asked in an almost reverent tone.

You nodded and slowly pulled out the pouch from under your shirt.

"Here."

Everyone gathered around you, looking at the oval stone in your hand.

“That’s a funny key”, Nami said as she cocked her head, a thoughtful expression on her face. “Maybe the demon tricked you.”

You were about to object, but Aidan beat you to it.

“No that’s the key. I can feel it.”

Something about the tone he used when he said that made you uneasy, but no one else seemed to notice. You glanced over at him, but he was still ignoring you.

“Why does Kyra get to have the key?”, Emrys asked, his icy eyes challenging you.

Aidan suddenly looked at you and then at the key, a gleam in his eye. Then he shook his head as if to shake off a thought.

“Because she’s the leader. She’s the only one who knows what to do with it.”

Emrys looked like he wanted to argue with that but then he changed his mind and shrugged. “It’s not very impressive, is it? I’m going hunting. I’m starving.” He turned and walked away from the group.

“I expected it to be... Well, a key.” Ethan said with a small laugh. “But I guess it’s a metaphor or something right?”

“That’s nice and all”, Lynn remarked dryly, „but I’d rather know what happened up there. I understand why you were unaffected Aidan, but what about you Kyra?”

She gave you a suspicious look. You slowly put away the stone, while in your mind you cursed Lynn for being so observant. The others had stopped chatting about the key and were now looking at you with curiosity. Suddenly you were glad that Emrys had stalked off. He and Lynn seemed to have taken to being the cynical ones.

“She was affected.”

You looked over at Aidan, and suddenly a different sense of discomfort came over you. He wouldn’t dare, would he?

“Then why weren’t you covered in snow? You looked like you’d been awake all along.”

Megumi, of course, didn’t realize that she was adding fuel to the fire, the poor soul, but you still glared at her, making her blush.

“I snapped out of it earlier.”

“How?”

In that moment, you could have strangled Ethan. No one needed to know how.

“Aidan slapped me before I fell asleep. You guys were already down, that’s why it didn’t work on you.”

“Wait? Are you telling us that while we were out cold, literally, you and Aidan went around slapping us?”, Ethan asked.

Somehow they didn't look too fond of the idea.

“Pretty much, since Kyra wouldn’t let me set you guys on fire.”, Aidan said, grinning like a mad man. You decided not to respond. Megumi put a hand to her cheek as if feeling for a bruise and you had to hide a grin. They seemed to need a moment to process the information, but at least no one pestered you with questions anymore.

“What now?”

So much for that.

“Now we make dinner and rest. Tomorrow we get the next key.”

No one objected. You set up camp by the lake for that night. You would have to dark walk them all to Babylon in the morning and you doubted that you would have the strength to transport them twice. The attack by the fire demon seemed to have weakened you further, leaving you drained. Mentally and physically. You had had two very restless nights in a row. All you wanted to do now was curl up and sleep, but it wasn’t meant to be.

The tents were back in the meadow. You were in no state to dark walk, so the group decided to take shelter amongst the trees. Ethan offered to create a makeshift hut out of earth and plants, an idea that was welcomed enthusiastically. The final construction was rather impressive. The walls were made of solid earth, and the roof and doorway were covered by branches Ethan had encouraged to grow over them. Not only would you stay dry in case of rain, but it would also keep out most of the cold. Aidan would take care of the rest. He seemed more energized than ever before, and you began to wonder if it had something to do with the stone in your pouch.

It was swiftly growing darker, and the first stars were beginning to show. Emrys and Lynn were sitting outside of the makeshift hut, skinning the two rabbits Emrys had caught. How he wouldn’t say. They were talking comfortably. Megumi was sitting across from Nami, watching the girl with a mixture of fear and curiosity, while the purple eyed girl carved symbols into the ground, humming a melancholic tune. Ethan had disappeared into the woods a few minutes ago to replace some firewood and Aidan was sitting by the lake looking over the water. You slowly made your way towards him.

You knew that he had heard you long before you got there, but he didn’t acknowledge your presence at all. It was strange. You had spent so much time ignoring him, giving him the cold shoulder, but now that he was doing it to you, you felt irritated. You were about to go back to the hut when he spoke up.

“Ereb huh?”

Your entire body tensed. The tribes didn’t like Shinehah, sure, but they really didn’t like Ereb. To most Ereb represented everything bad in the world. He was what Christian’s would call the devil, the evil lurking in the shadows. You’d never agreed with that way of thinking, and neither did the Shemsuddin. Ereb wasn’t evil, he was just Chaos, and chaos was dangerous. It had taken you a long time to stop thinking of his heritage as a curse and see it for the blessing that it was. Aidan’s words made every part of your body scream at you that this was dangerous territory and that you should get rid of the problem. It wouldn’t be all that hard. Ask him to talk in private and then get rid of him. But that was in theory. In reality, you weren’t that cold yet. Not unless you had to be.

“Yes.”

“Is that why you control shadows? I thought you were a child of Shinehah.”

“I am”, you sighed. “And yes. That is why I control the shadows. I am both. “

“How does that work exactly? Having two patrons?”

You had wondered that yourself. You had never heard of anything like this before, but you had had plenty of time to think about it. You had come to the conclusion that Ereb didn’t have descendants the way the other gods did but that he adopted them. Those who were neglected by the gods, those who didn’t fit into any pattern, would always fit in with Chaos. He was the patron of all the lost souls. You decided to give Aidan as much truth as you could without letting him know too much

“I don’t know. Maybe my Mom was one thing and my Dad the other. I think my Dad must have been a child of Ereb. He was a no good artist, fits with chaos.”

He just nodded, not saying anything and you sat down next to him, your eyes wandering over the black water. Every once and again the water would ripple, from a fish or a leaf falling into the water. You loved the water, it made you feel safe somehow. Even now, sitting here with Aidan. It felt strangely familiar.

“Do you remember that time on the docks by the lake?”

You looked over at him, studying him. His forearms were resting on his knees, his hands folded comfortably. He looked relaxed, at ease. He had surprised you with that question. Of course, you remembered that day. Here you were contemplating getting rid of him and he was going down memory lane.

“Yes I remember”, you heard yourself say, almost against your will.

“That was a good day.”

It had been a good day. It was strange, but that one memory had survived all the bitterness you felt for him, all the pain. It had survived shining bright and clear in your memory. You remembered the heat of the day, the cool water splashing against your ankles. You remembered his laugh. You remembered yours. A perfect day.

“How did we end up here?”

In an instant, the familiarity of the moment was gone. The question hit you harder than he could have possibly known. Your body tensed as you subconsciously pressed your lips together in a thin line.

“You know how”, you said icily as you got up. “I came here to ask if you would be so kind to make a fire.”

You didn’t stick around to replace out how he reacted to the abrupt change that had overcome you. You didn’t care. You didn’t care about that stupid day by the lake, you didn’t care about Aidan. That moment just now had been no more than a momentary weakness. You missed Khai and Asha. That was all.

You ignored Aidan as he made the fire, and one by one the rest of the group gathered around the warm flames. Soon the air was filled with the scent of the stew Lynn, Emrys, and Ethan had made with the potatoes you had packed and the two rabbits they had caught. To your growling stomach, it felt like the best meal you’d had in a long time. The first round was passed in silence. Not an uncomfortable one, but in a way it was uneasy. You were all sitting around the fire, Emrys and Lynn on your right, Megumi, Aidan and Ethan on your left. Nami was sitting across from you, her lilac eyes far away.

“I’m glad I’m here.”, a soft voice spoke into the silence. You raised your eyebrows in surprise at the sudden input. It was Megumi, her bowl in her small hands, her eyes looking into the fire. She looked up at the group, smiling.

“I’m glad I’m here because... I’m doing something. I don’t know if that makes sense”, she blushed, but continued, ”but at the Reservoir I felt useless. My powers don’t support the community and I’m too weak to be a huntress, or to build something. But Yesterday Aidan and I helped stop a three-headed dragon! Sure, Kyra took it out, but I did something. I’m not useless. I just wanted to say that.”

She was blushing profusely now. Aidan leaned over and gave her a one-armed hug. “Megi, you’re never useless.”

“Thanks”, she muttered, her blush deepening.

“I agree”, Ethan stated, a warm smile on his face as he placed his own arm over Megumi’s shoulder. “You’re kind and you always make me smile. You just might be my favorite person here.” He winked at her. You were afraid that if she blushed any more the redness would never go away.

You smiled at her.

“That I can agree on. I’m happy to hear that you like being here. To be honest, I was wondering if you guys would be scared off by now... It’s only the first stop and already we’ve nearly died twice.”

Emry’s laughed. “That’s the only reason I’m still here. Finally some excitement. I was going insane in the Reservoir, run by those boring old farts.”

Lynn shook her head at the statement, a small smile on her face. “Kyra, we knew that this would be dangerous. The Elders have forbidden anyone from seeking the keys for centuries, but I agree with Emrys. The old farts, as he so delicately put it, can’t control us forever. We deserve our own place, our own home. I think it’s worth risking our lives for.”

“But you had a home”, Nami suddenly said, her eyes fixed on Lynn. “You were not an outcast. Your powers were not so unusual that people would avoid you. People are afraid of me, I don’t mind, but I want a place where I can not mind in peace.”

“I may not have been an outcast, but that doesn’t mean that I belong. Yes my powers are traditional, yes I had a place within the community, but I was just as much a prisoner as you were. I don’t want to work in the water system. Water may be my power, and I love it, but it’s not all there is to me. I want to be a teacher, but they won’t let me. The gifted must stay within the Reservoir, they shouldn’t go into the world and fulfill their dreams. Sure, I could teach at the Reservoir, but that’s not my assigned post. The Elders hold on to traditions that are long outdated. They don’t believe in equality, they don’t leave room for ambition. I want to be more. And I believe that others deserve to be more as well.”

“Same”, Aidan butted in. “Today, for the first time, I felt good about being a son of Esh. My powers shouldn’t be something to be hidden away, they should be mine to use, mine to be proud of. We of Esh are always taught that our powers are too close to the sun and, therefore, something to use sparingly. Lighting a fire with just my hands is frowned upon at the reservoir, but there’s so much more to what I can do. I feel that now. That stone in your pouch, I can feel it. It radiates fire, passion, strength. In a way, it’s a part of who I am. Receiving it felt...right.”

“Aw, how sweet”, Emrys mocked, earning an eye roll from you.

“You’ll see Emrys. When you get Olea’s key, you’ll know what I’m talking about. There’s this...rush. We don’t hear from our godly patrons, they are silent, they always have been, but today I felt Esh’s presence. It was as if he were right there next to me.”

You wondered what that would be like. How would it feel to be that close to Shinehah? Would it be like in your dreams? Or better? Well, you’d know soon enough. More than that. If you succeeded it wouldn’t just be as if Shinehah were there. She actually would be. She’d be free again, and you would be too. As always when you thought of Shinehah, you felt a warm, gentle presence in your chest. You looked around at the others, studying the thoughtful expressions on their faces. Even Emrys looked as if the idea of being close to his patron was a good one.

“That’s why we won’t give up”, Megumi said, a smile on her face. She looked at you. “Kyra. Thank you for making me a part of this. Maybe one day people will think: Megumi Kazehaya. She was one of the seven who found the Lost City.”

She was beaming at you, oblivious to the guilt her words brought up in you. She looked so happy, so innocent, convinced that she was helping to create a beautiful place of equality, a utopia. You pushed the guilt down. In a way, she was right. It just wouldn’t be the way she expected it, but nothing in life ever was. Once Shinehah was free she would right the wrongs done by the Six and the Elders. Shinehah’s children would stand tall. She would bring out the truth, but she would not be cruel. She would only punish those who would stand in her way, the others would be safe. And those who had freed her? You were sure that they would be rewarded, even if they had done it unknowingly.

“You’ll be famous”, Aidan teased her, making her smile even broader.

“And hated.”

Emrys words put an instant damper on the light mood around the fire.

“Way to be a party pooper”, Lynn mumbled.

Aidan gave Emrys a dirty look while Megumi looked as if she’d been slapped. You looked at Emrys. His face was, for once, completely serious. He wasn’t just saying this to be annoying, or controversial. He had thought about this.

“It’s true you know. If the Elders replace out they’ll try to stop this. They would lose their power, their control. That’s why you recruited us in secret isn’t it?”

You nodded.

“It is one of the reasons, yes. Another one is that I don’t believe that just anyone can get the keys. Sure you have to be a gifted heir of the respective God, but it’s more than that. Today, up on that mountain, I realized that it can’t just be any gifted heir. The guardian knew Aidan. He knew him by name. I think that means there’s more to this. I think I found you guys for a reason that maybe, the Gods brought us together.”

It was a bluff, a big one at that, to claim divine intervention, and yet it seemed to work. Aidan was easy to win over, he’d felt his patron’s blessing, but the others were just as receptive to your flattery. They all wanted to be special, they were all tired of being singled out by the Elders. Hearing that the God’s themselves might approve of them... Well, it hit too close to home. They wanted it to be true, so they believed it. They didn’t know that the God’s would never approve of this quest, that they were betraying their patrons by joining forces with you. How could they? They wanted to be special, and you gave them the chance to be.

“She’s right. Being up there, on that mountain, I felt home. What we’re doing is right.”

Aidan sounded so convinced that even Emrys gave a tiny nod. The mood had improved drastically until Nami spoke.

“The ghosts are restless, wandering, moaning, crying without voices. They too, feel the Gods.”

Her words made everyone stare, as a feeling of uneasiness settled over the group. It was amazing how she could do that with just two sentences. She was staring into the distance, a frown on her face, her fingers playing with a loose thread on her red sweater. She looked eerie in the firelight as if she were no more than a ghost herself. Her words sent a shudder down your back. Now that she’d said it you could feel them again, the ghosts caught in the shadows. The first layer had been weakened, its cornerstone removed. Ghosts stuck in the first layer were usually new spirits and didn’t stay there for long, moving deeper into the shadow world. But now they seemed to be waiting, biding their time, hoping that the walls keeping them from life would fall.

“Ok then”, Aidan said, giving Nami an odd look. “I think some of us are a little bit tired. Maybe we should catch some Z’s before our adventure tomorrow, and let the ghosts do the same. “

Nami didn’t react to his words, she just kept staring into the distance, but the rest agreed that this was a great idea. It was hard to care about imaginary ghosts when one was dead tired. That night you were visited by yet another dream.

The snow was falling lazily around the woman, calmly drifting to the ground it had already claimed. All was white. All was still. She was standing perfectly still in front of a black gate. At first you thought it was Shinehah, but then the image grew sharper. The woman was too short, too dark. There was no snow on her long green cloak or her long dark hair. Something about her was strangely familiar, but you could not put your finger on it. You just felt as if you should know her. For the longest time she didn’t move, almost as if she were waiting for something then she flicked her hand and the gates swung open.

Slowly, as if in a trance the woman moved through the gates and entered the graveyard beyond. The dark tombstones rose out of the snow like the teeth of a sleeping beast, waiting to swallow her hole, but she did not waver. She walked through the forest of graves, stepping around the stones without even looking at them until she came to a halt in front of a small mausoleum at the far end of the graveyard. It looked old, very old, with the statue of a handsome young knight guarding its door. He too looked familiar.

The woman took a deep breath and entered. The inside of the mausoleum was empty except for one simple stone coffin. There were no embellishments, no decorations, just the cold hard stone on which the woman softly placed her hand. She spoke in a soft, gentle voice, barely above a whisper.

“My dear child. How will you ever forgive me?”

You wanted to look closer, to see her face, but then the scene shifted and you were suddenly standing in the middle of a raging fire. You felt the heat against your face, felt the smoke enter your lungs. How had you gotten here? Where were you? It looked as if you were in the middle of a house. A house that looked terrifyingly familiar. With a start, you realized that this was your old house! You heard someone scream and without thinking about it, you ran into the direction it had come from. You knew that voice! The flames were licking at the walls, consuming them eagerly. You wouldn’t be able to stand it much longer, but you had to replace them. You had to save them.

This time, you would be fast enough.

You burst into the kitchen. The scene in front of you confirmed what you’d come to believe for a while now. It hadn’t been a gas explosion, as the authorities had claimed. There, in the flames you saw three figures. One was your mother, cradling a smaller shape in her arms. You didn’t need to go closer to know that that was your little brother, Caleb, his small arms hanging down lifelessly. With just as much certainty, you could also tell that he was dead.

A sob escaped your lips.

You wanted nothing more than to run over there and shake him, make him wake up. The only thing keeping you from doing it was the large figure standing between you and your mother. The form looked vaguely humanoid, but seemed oddly disproportional, as if it had been stretched. Long blue flames were flickering around it, sending waves of heat at regular intervals. Whatever this thing was, it was the source of the fire. One of its long arms was reaching out for your mother.

You called out, trying to run to her, but suddenly your legs were too heavy. You couldn’t move! Helplessly you watched as the long arm reached your mother and she cried out in agony, still clutching Caleb to her chest. Then the heat and the smoke became too much for you. Right before you passed out the creature turned towards you, looking at you with its black eyes, the softest of smiles on its red lips.

The desert sands stretched out before you for miles and miles, the air was burning hot, sky azure blue, a color that reminded you of home, and there, in the distance, the black tower rose into the sky like a black scar in the horizon. It cast no shadow on the ground, despite the morning sun. You could feel its evil presence all the way to here, and despite the cold a shiver ran down your back. Nami stepped next to you, her eyes fixed on the monstrosity before you.

“What is that?”

Her voice was quiet, fearful, as if she too, could smell its vile stench.

“What is what?”, Aidan asked, looking into the same direction as you and Nami, but failing to see the tower.

The others now turned too, straining their eyes to see whatever it was that you two were looking at. They did not see it. To them, it was hidden, and you almost wished it were hidden from your sight too. Almost. But you needed to see it.

“The tower of Babel.”

The words did it. Five people gasped as one, as the monstrosity before them was revealed. It could only be seen by those who knew it was there.

“The tower of Babel? Like the one from the Bible. Are you telling me that stuff’s real?”, Ethan asked, his eyes glued to the tower before him. It was hard to look away once one had seen it. It seemed to draw you in, call to you with your hidden fears until you couldn’t resist anymore.

“Partially. The tower is definitely real. Although they got a couple of facts wrong about the story.”

“That tower is alive, filled with living nightmares, crawling, sneaking under its skin. I do not like it. Not at all.” Nami looked at you with apprehensive eyes, and once again you were reminded of the fact that she could see more than anyone here. Even you, and you saw through the shadows.

“Great, more creepy speech. Will you lighten up weirdo?”, Emrys muttered, loud enough to be heard by everyone.

Nami didn’t seem to mind, though, you weren’t even sure his words had registered. Her eyes were glued to the tower, something like panic lingering in those purple eyes. It was the first time you had seen her like this, but you could understand her. Because she was right.

“I don’t like it either, but that’s our path.”

Her head spun around, and her eyes fixated you. They seemed to be screaming, but her lips remained shut. You turned away, suppressing a shudder.

Lynn, who had been deathly quiet so far, suddenly spoke, pointing into the sky.

“What’s that above the tower?”

Everyone looked up. Everyone but you. You knew all too well what hung there in the sky above the tower. Misery lay there. Selfishness. Regret. Your past. All of that and more. But those were not important now. You took a deep breath, closed your eyes, and let it out again as you opened them.

“That is what people used to call the hanging gardens of Babylon. But it has another name too… The city in the sky, the garden of Eden, Zion, the City of the Gods, although not the one we’re looking for, sadly.”

“Wait a second. So you’re saying that the hanging gardens of Babylon and the biblical city that was raised into heavens are the same? How does that even make sense?”

You were about to open your mouth but Ethan beat you to it.

“The Jews and Christians believe that there was a city that was raised into heaven, but that’s not the real story. The real story is that this was Shemayim’s place of worship. There was the City of the Gods, the one we’re after, yes, but they all had individual places of power. This was Shemayim’s. She created an island in the sky, a place for her priests, the Lamassu, to go and worship."

You nodded.

"They’re right about the tower, though. It was built to reach the gods. Lilith built it. Nami was right when she called it a tower of living nightmares. All your worst fears, hopes, and desires will come at you in there. You must remember, at all times, that none of it is real. As long as you know that, nothing can happen to you. If you forget… You’ll be trapped within your nightmares forever, until you too, eventually, become no more than a dream.”

That last word, was no more than a whisper, as you looked into the distance, at something no one but you could see. Maybe you couldn’t really see it either. Because it was gone, wasn’t it?

I’m so sorry Khai.

“Well that was happy.”, Emrys stated dryly.

You chuckled without humor. Yeah, you supposed it was.

“Who’s Lilith?”

Megumi’s question was quiet, and oh so innocent. She shouldn’t be here, you suddenly thought. But it was too late for that. You needed her, especially now.

“Lilith is a daughter of Ereb, a dark sorceress, and the mother of all monsters”, Ethan said in a tense voice, as if it cost him to utter those words. You didn’t blame him. Most saw Lilith as a creature just as bad as Shinehah. Maybe even worse, because she had used to be human.

“And why would she build something as horrendous as this?”, Megumi asked in that innocent, childish way of hers.

“Because she wanted to seize the City of the Gods. The second key is up there, you can feel it can’t you? And that tower is the only way to get to it.”

“You want us to enter that thing?!”, Aidan as incredulously.

“It’s the only way. But the tower is the worst part… The gardens themselves are actually quite… lovely.”

If anyone heard the bitterness and pain in your voice as you said this, they didn’t let on.

“How do you know all this stuff? I mean, we’ve heard stories about the Gods, but you seem to know stuff none of us do. Stuff we’ve never even heard off. I mean until a few days ago Dragons were no more than a myth to me, and now we’ve fought a one and it had three heads. So how do you know so much about Lilith, about monsters, and especially how do you know so much about that flying island?”

Lynn’s words struck a chord with everyone, making them wonder just the same, and they looked at you, expectantly. You looked over at them and, with a sad smile, said:

“Because I’ve been there before.”