If You Want Me (The Toronto Terror Series)
Chapter 33

The benefit of Aurora staying at Roman’s while Zara visits means all she has to do is cross the hall once everyone is in bed. The downside is the potential for getting caught sneaking back in again—Zara’s already done it once—and the growing awareness that I’m deceiving Roman. It hasn’t stopped me from seeing Aurora, though. Or getting inside her. I’m an addict, always looking for a fix, worried the next time will be the last. The last time to touch her, kiss her, hold her.

I’m on my way home from the grocery store, having run out of Postie and Malone’s favorite cat food. I also picked up a few treats for Aurora and a bottle of her favorite wine. We have plans for later tonight, when everyone else is in bed.

My phone buzzes, and I fish it out of my pocket, checking the new message from Aurora.

Princess

I have an hour before I leave for class and I need you.

I check the time. Roman and I head over to Tristan’s for a workout in half an hour. I pick up my pace as I round the corner.

Hollis

You can’t wait until tonight?

Princess

*pouty faced GIF*

She follows it up with a picture of Batdick lying on her bed—back in her own apartment, based on the lack of pink.

Princess

Guess I’ll take care of myself.

I have enough time to get her off before I meet up with the guys.

Hollis

Don’t start without me.

I speed walk the rest of the way, and her door opens as I come down the hall. Aurora is wearing a short, blue satin robe cinched at the waist and a pair of team socks, the ends of her hair are damp. “Hi.”

“Hi, yourself.”

She flips the latch while I shrug out of my jacket, toe off my shoes, and drop the groceries on the side table. As soon as my hands are free, I pull her against me, curving my palm over her ass. “Are you naked under there?”

She nods as she links her hands behind my neck. “I know you have a workout soon, so I wanted to be ready.”

“I always have time to take care of you.” I grip the back of her legs, hoisting her up, fingers close to all that tight, soft, and wet.

She wraps herself around me, hooking her feet at the small of my back as she nips at my jaw. “I can’t get enough of you.”

“Feeling’s mutual.” I carry her across the apartment and into her bedroom, kicking the door shut while she bites my neck.

Batdick is lying on her bed. I climb up with Aurora still wrapped around me.

I tap her thigh. “I can’t help you like this unless your plan is to hump my stomach.”

She unhooks herself from around me and drops to the bed. Her hands go to my belt buckle.

I catch her wrists in mine and give her a dark look, tsking. “Such a bratty girl. You think you deserve my cock right now?”

Her bottom lip juts out. “But I want you.”

Nothing will ever sound as good as her telling me how much she wants me—needs me. I slide my fingers into the hair at the nape of her neck and hover my lips over hers. “How should I fuck you?” I pull the tie at her waist, and her robe falls open.

“However you want. I just need you to make me come, Hollis. It’s never as good when I do it myself.”

I skim her nipple with a knuckle, and she whimpers. “Should I fill you with my fingers?” I trail them down her stomach, pausing when I reach the apex of her thighs. “Or maybe my tongue.”

“Please, yes.” Her fingers lap my wrist, and she tries to guide it between her thighs.

I brush my lips against hers. “Lie back for me.”

She complies, falling against the pillows. I skim her clit with my knuckle. “So wet and ready.”

“It’s like this every time I think about you.” Her legs part for me, and I tease her opening.

Batdick rolls into her sock-covered foot, and I snatch it up before she can. “I think it’s time I replace out why you’re so in love with this.”

Her eyes flare for a moment, but her grin turns coy. “But you’re right here. Why would I need Batdick when I can have you?”

“You get me later.” I push my sleeves up to my elbows and note the arrow at the bottom of the device. I twist it, and the vibrator buzzes to life.

“I can show you.” Aurora moves to sit up.

“I think I can figure it out.” I shift so I’m between her spread thighs and press the buzzing head to her clit. She shrieks, and her knees clamp against my hips.

When she tries to wriggle away, I bar my forearm over her stomach, pinning her to the bed, but dial back the buzzing. Her legs fall open again, and her eyes roll up. She sucks in a gasping breath as I slide the vibrator inside her, watching it disappear inch by slow inch. “Oh, fuck. Yes, please…” She groans when I tilt it up as I pull it back out, slick and coated with her juices.

I start a slow, easy rhythm. The kind that will keep her on the edge, needing more. “Tonight, when we’re alone, I’ll fill this pretty little mouth with my cock first, and then I’ll fuck this greedy pussy until you’re coming all over me.”

“Oh, God, do it now, please.” She snakes a hand between her thighs, but I capture her wrist.

How much would I love to send her to class with swollen lips? But I don’t want to rush. I shake my head. “Bratty girls have to wait to get fucked properly.” I bend down and bite the inside of her thigh, close to her knee.

“I need more,” she whimpers.

“You’ll get more when I’m ready to give it to you.” I change the angle, replaceing the spot inside that makes her eyes roll up again and those deep moans I love so much tumble over her lips. I give in to the urge to taste her, pushing the vibrator deep as I capture her swollen clit and suck. At the same time, I drag the thumb on my free hand along the edge of the vibrator, going lower still, until I graze my thumb over door number two, as she likes to call it, while blushing.

She drags in a high-pitched gasp as I gently massage the tight opening. I lift my gaze to hers and press against it, testing her.

“Hollis,” her voice is soft and breathy.

“You want more, Princess?” I lap at her clit.

“Please, yes,” she whimpers.

I keep fucking her with the vibrator while I circle her clit with my tongue and ease my thumb into her ass, up to the first knuckle.

“Oh God. Oh my God.” She grips one breast and arches.

I push in farther, cock kicking at the possibilities. At how fun it will be to show her all the ways I can make her feel good.

“I feel so full. That’s… Oh, I—” Her hands slide into my hair, and she moans my name, hips rolling and jerking as her thighs close around my head. She shudders violently and tries to pull my mouth away, but I suck again, addicted to the sound of my name on her lips, the feel of her pulsing against my tongue.

I lick her one last time and lift my head as her hands fall from my hair. I ease my thumb out first, then turn off the vibrator and slowly withdraw it. Her eyes flutter open, and I smile at the dazed look on her face. “Feel better?”

“Immensely,” she mutters. “You can fuck me with Batdick any time you want. And do that thing with your thumb.” Her cheeks flush pink.

I give her a quick kiss, wishing I could fuck her exactly the way I want to, then glance at the clock on her nightstand. “I have to go. I’ll see you tonight.”

“But you’re rocking a ridiculous hard-on.” She flings a hand in the direction of my crotch. The jogging pants don’t help my situation.

“Don’t worry, I’ll calm down.” I leave her sprawled on her bed and rush to shove my feet into my shoes and nab my jacket from the floor. I adjust my hoodie so it covers my problem and head for the elevators. The doors slide open, and Roman looks up from his phone.

“Hey, man, I was just texting you.” His gaze shifts to the number on the elevator. “Were you at Peggy’s?”

I scramble for a good reason to be at his daughter’s that doesn’t include fucking her with her goddamn vibrator. “Yeah. I ran out of cat treats, and I grabbed Aurora some smoky bacon chips because she mentioned she couldn’t replace any when she went shopping earlier in the week. I was dropping them off.”

The elevator doesn’t seem like a great place to tell him the truth, since there’s no way to escape his wrath in here, but isn’t that what I deserve anyway? I hate seeing Aurora so anxious about it, and it makes me want to fix it. I almost open my mouth to say something, but the words lodge in my throat. She expressly asked me to wait. To hold off. To give her time. I need to trust that not yet will become now. It’s harder than I want it to be. My past creeps into my present, the fear she’ll just change her mind sinking its claws in. I could push her away if I say something now. And the idea of losing her…that’s a wound I’m not sure I’ll heal from. I can’t let her go.

He smiles and claps me on the shoulder. “I appreciate you always looking out for her, even the little things, man.”

I rub my lips, trying to camouflage my guilt, but my fingers still smell like Aurora. I shove them in my pockets. “It’s not a big deal.”

“It’s just nice to know I can count on you to back me up when it comes to my baby girl. I couldn’t ask for a better friend.”

Shame is a heavy rock in my stomach as I force a smile. I know it won’t be easy, but Aurora and I need to figure out how to tell him before it’s too late.

Roman has a couple of errands to run after our workout. He invites me along, but I feel like a bag of garbage, so I head back to my place. As I’m letting myself into my penthouse, Zara pokes her head out of Roman’s door.

She’s wearing a floor-length skirt, a flowy top, and her long hair hangs over her shoulder in a braid. I see Aurora in her lean frame, dark eyes, and soft smile. “Hi, Hollis. Do you have a minute?”

“Yeah. Of course. Come on in.” I step aside, and she crosses into my place.

I’ve been waiting for this since she caught Aurora sneaking back in on her birthday, two nights ago. According to Aurora, she promised not to say anything to Roman. I suggested maybe now was the time to tell him. But Aurora nearly broke down in tears, worried about how it would affect the rest of Zara’s visit, so I relented. I hope Zara hasn’t changed her mind.

“Can I get you anything? Something to drink?”

“A glass of water would be nice, thank you.” She glances around my place. One of Aurora’s scrunchies is on the floor. Malone has decided they’re his new favorite toy.

I offer her a seat in the living room and excuse myself to pour us both water. It gives me a moment to collect myself. Zara’s easygoing, but I can only imagine how this looks from her side.

Postie has already made himself at home in her lap on the couch by the time I return. Malone is snuggled by her side. I take a seat in the chair across from her, and Malone defects to my lap. Thankfully he doesn’t start the blanket humping. It’s like he knows it’s inappropriate in current company.

“I think you’re a great guy, Hollis, and I believe you will treat Aurora well. But I have some real concerns.”

We’re cutting straight to the chase, apparently. “We plan to talk to Roman.”

“Aurora mentioned that.” She strokes Postie, who purrs up a storm, oblivious to the tense conversation taking place. “Let me be very clear. I understand that everyone sees me as a free-loving hippie, which I am. But it’s the openness of my relationship with North, and our willingness to communicate and set clear boundaries, that allows this. How do you think this will go over with Roman? How will he feel knowing you’ve been dating our daughter behind his back?” Her tone isn’t confrontational or combative; it’s a question she wants answered.

I go with honesty. “I think he’ll be very upset.”

She nods slowly. “Especially since you’re intentionally keeping it from him.”

“I’d rather take Roman’s anger than create more stress for Aurora. Especially with how much she has going on. The idea of her being upset unravels me,” I reply.

Zara nods again. “And that’s why you’re so intent on waiting? Because you think she can’t handle more stress?”

These reasons are convenient and hide my own deeper fears—that Aurora will realize she can do better, that the baggage I’m carrying around is more than she’s prepared to deal with. I run my hands down my thighs, considering my words carefully. “Aurora is used to taking care of Roman as much as he takes care of her. She’s the one who cheers him up on a bad day. She takes care of him when he’s sick, or takes a hard hit on the ice. He’s as much her world as she is his. She’s concerned about Roman’s reaction, and how it will impact the team dynamic going into playoffs. Roman’s my best friend. I hate to admit, but she’s not wrong. It will mess with things on the ice.”

She arches a brow. “Do you truly believe that’s her sole reason?”

“Fear of the unknown and hurting Roman are at the top of her list.” There’s a level of codependency between them, but part of that is directly related to Zara’s role in her life. I don’t particularly want to go there any more than I want to do a deep dive into my own shit.

She rubs Postie’s cheek while I do the same with Malone. Thank God for selfish cats who want to be petted. It’s the only thing tempering my anxiety.

“I can’t force you to tell Roman sooner, and I certainly understand your concern about his reaction. He is incredibly protective of our daughter. I appreciate that you want to support Aurora’s needs. I think you can be very good for her, but she’s young. You have far more life experience. How will you ensure that she’s a healthy person? It’s easier to manipulate your partner when there’s such a gap between you.” She raises a hand when I start to interject. “I don’t believe that’s something you would do intentionally, but she will look to you for guidance. It’s up to you to make sure you’re helping her realize her full potential. It would be easy for you to swoop in and take care of her, give her everything she could ever want. But as a partner, you’ll also need to make sure she’s following the path she wants, and not the one you’re setting out for her.”

I nod, absorbing her words. These are all things I’ve thought about, but I want to put her at ease anyway. I want her approval and her support, not just for myself, but for Aurora. “I’m in the last few years of my first career, and she’s about to start hers, so we’ll be on a new path together. She’s ambitious and driven. I want to be there to support her dreams and help her achieve them.”

Zara smiles. “Just remember that as her lover, your advice and your words will hold more meaning than most. Aurora has incredibly deep feelings for you, and I sense that yours match. I believe that’s why you’re following her lead with Roman. But it’s up to you to show her she’s worth the risk you’re both taking.”

“She is. Absolutely.”

“Right now, I think you believe you’re putting her first by honoring her request for secrecy. But who are you really protecting by not telling Roman? Whose heart are you risking? Sometimes by trying not to hurt someone, we end up doing the most damage.”