Love and Chaos Series
The Alpha King’s Ugly Bride Chapter 65

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She stayed silent, pondering over what he just revealed and when her alluring amber eyes finally lifted, she asked, "Does that change anything in our agreement?"

It changed everything. From their bond to their needs and vulnerabilities. The first union amongst married couples wasn't just mating, it meant they will give out a part of themselves, leave themselves vulnerable to the other party. Mating was an act of vulnerability, as it was of control and dominance. He trusted her enough to be vulnerable with her, but she didn't do the same with him.

That was what drove him away and the reason he kept off.

He knew that wasn't what she wanted to hear and so he shook his head. "No, it changes nothing. Take a walk with me." he stretched his hand out to her, and she reluctantly took it.

"When I was little, I'd hide out here whenever Edward and I played." He said, pointing to the path that led to the forest outside the palace. It now had a palisade for protection of keeping intruders out and keeping those in the palace in. There were also hedges around the open woods for security and to maintain territories during shift.

"I once hid there for the whole day and never came out."

Mia glanced up at him to see if he was telling the truth, and he gave her a straight look, telling her he was. "Oh, did they send out a search party for you?"

A smile appeared on his face, and he nodded. "I won the game, but scared the queen and angered the king. Robb banned the game and told me to never go back in there again. In his words, it was the forbidden forest."

"Let me guess, you did."

His smile turned into a mischievous grin as his green eyes flickered. "Yes, a couple more times, and he knew my rebellion was out of this world. He made those hedges around the trees to keep me away. I didn't give up too fast on playing in the wild, and soon I found my way around the hedges and took Edward with me. I stopped when Robb told me I was putting mine and my brother's life in danger with my recklessness."

He paused at the memory that replayed in his mind.

"Do not laugh, but I actually cried that night. He called me a reckless older brother. Apparently, the kingdom was still recovering from the war with the kingdom of Foth. They were still at the healing stage and father wanted me to be safe." "So he broke your heart to keep you safe."

"See, you're catching on." he poked her nose with his finger and felt her tingle at his touch.

"Then what happened? You seemed like a happy child growing up, rebellious but happy. That's not the case now, so what happened?"

The smile on his face reduced. "The reality of being the heir to the Wahala throne happened." He replied quietly.

"I'm sorry."

He shrugged, trying to look unaffected. He did a terrible job of it because he knew Mia saw through him.

They strolled toward the hedges in silence and Mia asked, "How long ago was that?"

Knowing she was interested in the story gave him a happy thrill, despite the tale being embarrassing. "Over twenty years..."

"And you never went back after becoming alpha king?"

"No, I didn't. the grooming of the next alpha king started, and I started learning I found other things to love around the palace. Mother did her best to mend my always broken heart with her kind words."

"The late queen sounds like an amazing person."

He smiled. “She was, but that wasn't enough for Robb."

Flashback

...

Xavier's fingers ran through Layla's silky blonde hair as he picked up the brush from the mirror stand and ran it through, gathering it into his hands. His mother had allowed him to play with her hair a few times after watching since he was but a child.

The first time he helped her with her hair for the family's annual temple visit, he was ten. Robb noticed the difference and demanded who made her hair with an upset voice. Terrified, she told him she did it herself and Robb reprimanded her and told her that was the maids' job. Xavier picked up since then and vowed to make her hair perfect. Robb would have nothing to fuss over. He made his mother's hair for the next three years and even though her hairstyles were always unique and impeccable, Robb never complimented her. After his grooming began, Xavier barely had time for his mother's hair. Whenever he could, he helped with her hair, and Layla always told him it was beautiful.

Robb never did.

He set the brush down and lathered her hair cream on his hands and then massaged her fore scalp. Layla's eyes were shut as he did his work, and he wondered if she shut them to hide the pain they held or because they were heavy. They couldn't be heavy, the day just began.

He picked up the iron hair cutter and ran it faintly through her hair, parting it with a straight line from the front to the back. Then he braided it down her back.

He was mid-way into braiding her hair when he blurted, "Do you love father?"

"Yes, with all my heart." She answered without a moment of hesitation, just like he expected.

"But father doesn't love you?"

Layla's eyes flew open. Surprised by his words, she stared at him in the mirror before her and their eyes met.

"Your father loves me, Xavier. Why would you ever think he didn't?" she gave him an absurd look.

He shrugged and his eyes dropped to her hair, "I don't know, I guess I see the way he talks to you and the way he treats you... He speaks to you as if you're his subject or slave, it is not the way to talk to someone you love."

He felt her fascinated stare at him through the mirror. "And what would you know about love?"

His cheeks heat and he hated bringing it up. His mother, the crafty queen, would make him spill more than he'd wanted to. "I know little, but lady Adah told me love is kind and true and it isn't arrogant or self-seeking. Father isn't kind, not with his words to you. I was born fourteen summers ago and have a mind of my own now and can tell what's true and what's not. Father also talks about doing what's best for the good of the kingdom. Was marrying you what was good for the kingdom?"

Layla sighed, and masked up the pain in her blue eyes, "Your father and I united as a necessity to save the kingdom first. Our feelings didn't come to play until a few years after we were married. Your father has a hard time showing his emotions, and that's because he's gone through a lot. He took over this kingdom when he was only eighteen and he fought his way to attain freedom and peace in the kingdom. Doing all this had scarred his heart and made it almost impossible to love, but he does in his own way." Xavier didn't believe the excuse his mother tried to give him about his father. He was no longer seven, no one could lie and manipulate him easily anymore. He could think for himself now. She wanted him to maintain a noble image of his father as every loving mother would want their child to. He didn't blame her. However, her words and his actions contradicted themselves.

His father was tender towards Edward and Elliott and whenever Xavier did what he deemed good, he was also kind towards him. Yet, with the Queen, it was different. Xavier who scrutinised them, had picked up the indications.

"I don't want to be like him when I grow up," he mumbled. "I don't want to be a cold king. I want to love my mate and queen and also make her happy."

Layla turned around so she could properly look at him and she took hold of his shoulders. "And you will not be like him. I have so much hope in you, Xavier, in you and Edward." her eyes grew glassy, "I don't want you to go through what he went through or end up like him. You've got a good heart and I know you will be great. I believe the burden of royalty will not crush you."

Layla let him go and wiped the tears that lingered on her face as soon as they heard a knock on her door. Flashback ends.

"Unlike my union to you, that happened as punishment. My mother's union to my father happened out of necessity. The more I look back now, the more I understand. She deserved more than she got, so much more." He finished and cleared his throat, but glancing up, he saw Mia staring at him like she could see into his very soul. It scared the life out of him, but this was what he signed up for. He bared himself to her when he took her, and vulnerability was one of what he consented to.

He feared this would be too much. Akor told him to manage his emotions healthily and perhaps what he had done wasn't healthy. He bet this won't be the side she'd want to see. He feared she would shut him down or say something patronising and crush his spirit. "Have you ever wished for another life?" her head swivelled to give him an angled glance.

"More times than I can count," he admitted, with a long exhale.

"And now?" her brow rose.

He wouldn't have met her if he had another life, so that had to be a good thing. Now he just wished to hold her close and never let go.

He smiled, "I no longer do."

"Good." She surprised him by taking his hand and racing them towards the forbidden forest.