Pursuing My Rejected Alpha
Chapter 41

Ronan had his hand on the door handle, but he was unable to turn it.

Lillian's words kept echoing in his mind.

"I know who killed your mother."

His mother.

Killed.

"My mother died of natural cause," Ronan announced with a hollow voice. It seemed as if he was trying to convince himself and not Lillian.

She did, didn't she?

Ronan clawed into the door handle.

The sound of languid footsteps hitting the floor was heard coming behind the Alpha.

.....

"Are you sure?" Lillian's question was like a blade that cracked Ronan's conviction. "Not even the slightest doubt?"

Ronan did not know. After he received the call from St. Clarence, he rushed to the hospital right away. Dane Silverback went ahead of him. By the time Ronan arrived, his mother had been taken to the mortuary.

By the time the frantic Alpha reached the mortuary, his mother had already...

"I don't know," he said. "I did not even see her body. She was cremated within two hours after death. The doctor said that it was heart failure."

Ronan banged a fist against the door.

What was the meaning of this?

Was Lillian saying the truth?

Was his mother... killed?

"Well, that is convenient, indeed," Lillian mused. "After they get rid of her body, they can spin any tale for you to hear."

"Who?" Ronan heard himself asking.

He waited for a while but he received no answer from the woman behind him.

Overcome with both grief and anger, Ronan turned around swiftly and grabbed Lillian's neck. The latter was unable to dodge in time. Gasping from shock, she desperately clawed at Ronan's hand to free herself. Unfortunately, the Alpha's grip was too strong. "Speak," Ronan hissed.

Lillian's face turned purplish from lacking oxygen.

She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing but a series of choked noises came out.

Ronan scoffed from disdain and loosened his grip.

Killing a pregnant woman was taboo.

When Lillian was about to drop to the floor, Ronan dragged her toward the nearest couch and dropped her there.

"Don't play games with me," he warned her. "Weren't you so eager to talk? Why are you all silent now?"

Lillian rubbed at the mark around her neck and breathed laboriously.

"I cannot tell you."

Ronan glared in her direction.

"Then I am going to destroy you before I replace out the truth."

Lillian shook her head weakly.

"If you kill me, you will never replace out the truth."

"And why not? Do you think yourself so smart that you can protect the killer from me?"

"I am not protecting anyone. I need protection myself," the blonde woman claimed.

Ronan roared out of frustration.

He dropped his weight on the opposite couch and clawed into his scalp with both hands.

"Alpha Ronan, listen. If you help me and pretend that this baby is yours, I will tell you who the killer is after the baby is born."

Ronan laughed mockingly.

"Again, maybe I don't need your help. Maybe I can replace out by myself. Don't underestimate Infinite Eclipse Pack."

Lillian took a deep breath.

"Have you found Shayla Plainheart?"

Ronan's face turned ashen.

Shayla Plainheart was an inconspicuous member of the Infinite Eclipse Pack. Even Ronan never took notice of her until Quinn talked about her possible involvement with Gavin Ashmore. "Let me guess," Lillian gave him a cynical smile. "You are wondering how I even know her."

"It's you," Ronan growled. "You are the one who set me up."

Lillian glared at Ronan.

"Will you please use your brain, Alpha Ronan?" She snapped impatiently. "Do you think I am courting death? Why would I tell you all this if I am really the one?"

"Maybe because you came rolling into my pack house, claiming to be pregnant with my baby!" Ronan snapped back.

The two werewolves glared at each other for a while before Lillian decided to be the more mature one and ended the glaring contest.

"The culprit intends to have me marry into your pack," she slowly explained.

"Well, tough luck. That is not happening."

"Stop acting like I am dying to marry you, Ronan Silverback. Because I am not."

"Aha."

Ronan leaned back on his seat, penetrating Lillian with a disdainful gaze.

Lillian huffed angrily. She was after all the most desirable Alpha's daughter out there. She did not deserve to be treated like this. Alas, she had no other choice. She had to hang all his hopes onto Ronan Silverback. "Listen to me," she tried again, gritting her teeth as she spoke. "We just need to pretend until the baby is born. Then you will replace out the truth and you can do whatever you want with the culprit." "What if I still refuse to? You know more than I thought, but it doesn't mean that I will not replace out. I am going to replace out the truth if it means that I have to chase the murderer to hell." Lillian bit into her lip. She did not want to say it out loud, but Ronan left her no option.

"Honestly, Alpha Ronan? You are right. You can investigate all you want, but you are going to hurt people around you, left and right. Once the culprit is aware of their implication, they are in peril." "You are bluffing," Ronan called her out on her theory.

Lillian raised her eyebrows at the Alpha.

"Oh really? Why do you think your mother was killed?"

Ronan was stunned. For once, he was unable to answer.

Why? Why must his mother die?

His mother had no enemies. Sure, maybe Dane Silverback's mistresses held some grudge toward her, but she already left the Luna position years ago. It made no sense to make a move now. So why?

Why was his mother killed?

He stared back at Lillian, who did not blink even once.

"I don't know," he admitted. "Why?"

"Because you showed the belt to your mother and she started to investigate," Lillian told him. "Your mother's death was entirely your fault."

Ronan Silverback was infuriated.

He wanted to claw at the woman in front of him.

He wanted to make her suffer.

But at the same time, he wanted to make himself suffer even more.

Lillian's words were as sharp as a judgment spear that stabbed through his body and pinned him to the ground.

By instinct, Ronan knew that the woman spoke the truth.

It was Ronan who showed his mother the pictures of the belt.

It was Ronan who asked his mother if she saw it before.

He could faintly remember what his mother said about the belt.

"I feel like I have seen it before, but I cannot be sure."

"The design is very nice, too. Simplistic but elegant. I like it."

The conversation took place the last time they went out to have dinner together. It happened in the privacy of his own car.

Only a handful of people knew about the belt.

Kinnon and Bjorn.

Ronan and Lucien.

Ronan was the one who shared the belt pictures with his mother.

If Ronan had not tried to seek an answer from his mother, his mother would not have launched an investigation on her own.

It was his fault.

It was his fault his mother died.

Ronan shook uncontrollably in his seat.

He condemned Dane Silverback for the despicable way he treated his mother's body after death, but the person who sent her to her death was none other than Ronan! Her own son!

The Alpha let out a sorrowful howl.

Lillian flinched in her seat. She gave the pained Alpha in front of her a commiserative look.

She curled her trembling fingers into fists, resting them on her lap.

Although she knew that it pained Ronan to continue talking about this subject, she had to continue. She needed Ronan to agree to her proposal.

"Look, I am not going to pretend to be a saint and act as if I have nothing to gain from this arrangement.

Please, Ronan. You want to know the truth about who killed your mother and set you up in a conflict with the Night Prowler Pack. I just want to safely give birth and take my child away."

"Why do you need me for that?" Ronan asked once he was calm enough to speak again.

"For as long as you acknowledge the child as yours and accept me into your pack, the person will not do anything else," Lillian said, tears started falling from her beautiful eyes.

"Please. If you refuse to, they are going to kill my baby."

Ronan sighed into his steepled hands.

"I can guarantee your safety," Ronan said. "I can make sure that you come unscathed if you tell me right now who the person is. I will even arrange for you to start a new life somewhere hidden. You will be able to live the rest of your life in peace." Sobbing loudly, Lillian shook her head.

Ronan Silverback was not one to break his promises, but how could Lillian be sure that Ronan could deliver?

What if he lost against the villain?

Up until now, he did not even know that his own mother had fallen victim to an evil scheme that played out behind his back! Lillian simply could not take the risk.

"Ronan Silverback, even if I tell you now, you are not going to be able to detain the person," she stated.

"The mastermind is going to be released due to lacking evidence. You will lose your chance and I will be in danger."

Ronan banged a fist on his armrest and covered his face with his other hand.

"Then what is the point of waiting???" He shouted. "If I can't get the person now, I will not get him even after the baby is born!"

"No," Lillian shook her head. "You will, I promise."

Ronan clenched his jaw and stared at the sobbing mess in front of him.

"I need time," Lillian tried hard to convince him. "Give me time. By accepting me into your pack, the person will be relaxed enough to cover his crimes one by one. I will personally dig out the evidence and present them to you. All you need to do is trust me and wait."

"I need to talk to Lucien first," Ronan said after a while.

He needed Lucien to understand.

He needed Lucien to agree.

Until Lucien agreed to partake in Lillian's plan, Ronan was unable to make any promises.

The Alpha staggered to his feet and stumbled toward the door, but he was stopped by Lillian. The woman stepped before him and stretched her arms out to block the man from reaching the door.

"No!" Lillian cried. "You cannot tell your mate."

Ronan furrowed his brows at Lillian

"Why not?"

"If he knows, he too will be a target."

Ronan scoffed. Lillian underestimated Lucien too much.

"Lucien is not dumb. He knows how to play along."

"He won't unless he remains oblivious to this whole scheme," Lillian insisted. "Ronan, do you want the same thing to repeat? Do you want Lucien to lose his life?"

A sorrowful roar escaped Ronan's throat. He clawed at his head, trying to escape from the horrible images that his brain painted before his eyes.

Lucien's weakened state on the couch appeared before his mental eyes.

Lucien inside a casket. Pale and lifeless.

The burning flame of the mortuary, the merciless fire that engulfed his mother and turned her into a pile of ash.

No, Ronan shouted in his head.

"No," he cried. "Not Lulu. Nothing must happen to Lulu!"

Lillian closed her eyes and sniffled silently.

"You want to protect your mate and I want to protect my child. You can understand that, right Alpha Ronan? Let's cooperate."

Ronan looked up at Lillian. The woman was a bundle of tears.

"Five months," she begged. "Only five months."

"Please give me five months."

Ronan did not answer.

He went past Lillian and moved toward the door.

This time, he was able to turn the handle and escape the room.

Agitation was like poison, the healer told Lucien.

"In order to spread quickly into the victim's body, it drives the victim into a crazed state. After the poison achieves its goal, it slowly unfolds its true effect. Before the poisoning victim knows it, he is already losing control over his body and becomes a prisoner in his mind."

Lucien had to agree.

By that definition, he was already submerged into agitation.

"Thankfully, for every poison, there is an antidote."

The healer gave Lucien some concoction to calm his nerves. He offered to accompany Lucien until Ronan came back, but Lucien dismissed him instead.

Lucien did not know how much time passed. When he was close to falling into a slumber, Ronan came back.

Lucien turned his head toward the Alpha who staggered toward him. Ronan's face was pale with fright. As soon as he spotted Lucien on the couch, he knelt in front of the couch and pulled Lucien into a messy hug.

"What's wrong?" Lucien asked, sinking his fingers into Ronan's hair.

Ronan did not answer. He buried his face in Lucien's neck instead, taking a lungful of his mate's calming scent.

He needed it.

He needed Lucien.

He needed Lucien to stay with him, be with him.

He did not want his mate to leave him.

Ronan's desperation was apparent in the way he wrapped his arms around Lucien, trapping him in a hug he could not escape from.

Even without asking, Lucien could guess what Ronan and Lillian just talked about.

"The baby is yours, right?"

The warm body that pressed against Lucien trembled slightly, but Ronan said nothing.

There was really no need to say it out loud.

Silent tears spilled from Lucien's eyes.

He did not think that he could survive if he heard Ronan say it out loud.

"Ronan, what do you plan to do now?" Lucien asked.

"Nothing," Ronan said. "I don't want anything. I just want you."

Lucien chuckled. It was ironically funny how things turned out in the end.

How many years had he hoped that Ronan would settle down with some woman and start producing heirs?

Up until two months ago, he believed that Ronan had found his soulmate in Lillian. That Lillian was Ronan's destined Luna.

Of course Lucien was not happy about it. Who would? He was not a selfless saint and he never claimed to be one.

Despite his unhappiness, he had to admit that they made a great couple.

Ronan and Lillian could be very happy together.

That was what he believed in.

Thanks to his weak resolution, he ended up falling for Ronan again, deeper than before.

He loved the Alpha enough to leave his pack behind.

He loved him enough to brave the upcoming storm together.

If someone had told Lucien that this storm was going to take the form of a pregnant Lillian Woodland, would Lucien still make the choice to be with Ronan?

His tears fell on Ronan's shoulders.

Maybe not.

And here they were, stuck in a crappy situation. It could not get any worse, really.

"Do you want to end our mating bond?" Lucien asked softly, his tone devoid of emotion.

Ronan shook his head vigorously.

"No," he begged. "Please don't. I refuse. I will not accept it."

The Alpha pulled his mate from the couch so that they were both kneeling on the carpeted floor.

"Lulu, I will never reject you again. And I will not allow you to reject me."

The concoction worked wonderfully, Lucien thought. Although he was utterly devastated, he was as calm as the ocean.

The raging wolf inside him was transformed into a weak, powerless pup that only knew to cry and whine for affection.

"Ronan, she is not one of those rogue she-wolves that you sleep with for fun," Lucien reminded him. "She is the daughter of Conrad Woodland, Alpha of the Ironclad Claws Pack."

Ronan said nothing in return.

Lucien sighed into Ronan's shoulder.

"I don't see any other way other than us breaking the bond so that you can be with her."

"No!!!" Ronan shouted. "No, I don't want to. Lulu, we are legally bonded to each other. The contract is protected by the Moon Goddess!!!"

And the Moon Goddess was also the one who allowed Lillian to fall pregnant with Ronan's child.

"Then, will you send Lillian Woodland away?"

""

"Together with the child," Lucien added.

""

Again, Lucien thanked the Healer for the powerful medicine that he gave him.

Even though he wanted to push Ronan away and give him some well-deserved punches and kicks, he was powerless.

The adrenaline level in his body was not high enough to engage in a fight.

The way Lucien saw it, Ronan wanted it all.

He wanted to keep Lucien as his mate.

He also wanted to keep Lillian around because Lillian was having his baby.

So what was Lucien supposed to do?

Accept this unnatural arrangement with a smile?

Lucien thought of himself as relatively agreeable, but there was no way he would agree to share his mate with someone else.

Ronan should have known better.

"Let me go," Lucien said while pushing at Ronan's shoulders.

"No."

"Ronan. You cannot hug me forever. Let me go, I can hardly breathe."

In response, the Alpha bared his teeth and bit into Lucien's nape instead.

Lucien ripped his eyes open in shock.

"Ronan!" He shouted, struggling to break free to no avail.

Ronan did not care what Lucien thought about it.

It might be a dirty trick.

Infusing Lucien with more of his pheromones just to mess with his hormones.

He did not want Lucien to leave him.

The best way to do that was by making sure that Lucien could not live without him.

Just like Ronan could not live without Lucien.

After the tyrannical Alpha had his fill, Lucien fell limply against his body.

Ronan lifted

to his arms and pressed a kiss against his te's lips.

"Five months," he whispered into Lucien's ear. "Five months and I will make it all disappear. Lulu, please trust me."

That was the last thing Lucien heard before he lost consciousness.

Trust you?

Trust you to do what?

Ronan...

As soon as Lucien opened his eyes, a searing pain stabbed into his skull.

The man rolled to the side and pressed at the aching spot between his brows.

Next to him, the bed was empty.

What a terrible headache. And his whole body was sore too. He felt as if he had been beaten back and blue overnight. Only that he had not.

Ronan had already left, only his scent lingered behind.

Lucien crawled to the edge of the king-sized bed. When he looked down at the carpeted floor, a wave of dizziness attacked him and he slumped against the bed again.

.....

"Lulu."

Ronan's voice was loud and clear, followed by a warm hand on his cheek.

A moment later, Lucien was dragged back to the bed and tucked in properly under the quilt.

"The Healer said that you are exhausted from the memorial service preparation. You should rest a lot this week."

Was Ronan stupid or did he think that Lucien was demented?

Lucien clawed into Ronan's arm and shot him a glare.

"We are not done," he said. "Don't think that you can get away with biting me again and again."

The Adam's apple on Ronan's throat bobbed up and down nervously.

"Lulu, I... don't have anything else to add to what I said yesterday."

Lucien's face darkened.

"You are a selfish person," he chastised. "You want the best of both worlds."

Ronan grabbed Lucien under the armpits and dragged him so that the latter lay on his lap.

He knew that he was selfish.

Of course he was.

But what else could he do?

Tell Lucien and risk his safety?

He could not.

"Lulu, please," he begged. "Please trust me."

"I want to go home," Lucien snapped.

A heart-wrenching expression spread on Ronan's face. He pulled Lucien into a hug and mumbled against the latter's neck, "But Lulu, this is your home. It has been your home for more than a week."

Lucien blinked into the distance. He forgot about that one.

"Mmh."

Lucien shoved at Ronan's chest and grabbed his collar right after.

"What do you want me to do, Alpha?" He hissed. "Don't forget that I too am an alpha. I have my own pride. I am not willing to be your plaything, your mistress!"

Ronan cupped Lucien's face and pressed a kiss on the latter's reluctant lips. He only let Lucien go when the latter bit into his lip angrily.

"Don't you dare bite me again," he snapped, wiping the saliva off the corner of his mouth.

"Lucien, you will forever be my number one," Ronan begged. "This situation is beyond my control. I am very, very sorry."

In Ronan's head, Beowulf kept screaming for him to tell Lucien the truth.

'You are so stupid,' the wolf roared. 'Let that bitch take care of herself. You need to clear this misunderstanding with Lucien!'

'I can't,' Ronan said through gritted teeth. 'My mom. And Lulu's safety.

'Go hide Lucien in a far, far away place but tell him everything,' Beowulf insisted. 'Ronan, you are playing with fire!

'I trust Lucien, Ronan sighed. 'He has to trust me as well.

'You are a fool. You, trusting Lucien? You don't even trust that he isn't texting Kinnon when he's on phone. If a woman shows up and announces that she is pregnant with Lucien's baby, won't you be angry at all?'

Ronan clenched his fists.

Angry?

He would go rampant.

He would threaten the woman with Goddess knew what and then send her and the baby away for good.

"Arghhhh."

Ronan buried his face in Lucien's shoulder.

Lucien

sighed.

He hooked his arms around Ronan's neck and exhaled.

'Lucien, can I kill that woman?' Landon asked calmly. His tone was no different from one he used when he begged for cookies.

'Are you nuts? Do you want another war? Or do you want to be dragged to the trial again?' Lucien growled.

'It's all her fault, Landon hissed. 'What a shameless wench, making her appearance during a solemn memorial service and drawing all attention to her.'

Lucien scoffed.

'Would you rather she makes her appearance during the wedding then?'

"

"Ronan."

Ronan looked up with a distraught expression.

"Don't leave me," he begged. "Lucien, please. I can't take it. We are mates. You should not leave me alone."

"... Alone? Technically, I will be leaving you with the mother of your child and your heir."

"No," Ronan shook his head desperately.

"Please. Please. Please, don't leave me. I will do everything that you ask of me."

Landon howled in Lucien's head.

'Ask him to get rid of Lillian Woodland and I will act as if nothing happened last night.'

"

Landon was fierce. He was not as forgiving as Lucien. For him, anyone who stood between him and his happiness deserved to be eliminated.

Lucien could not do that.

"You ask for five months," Lucien spoke, his tone calm and collected. "I need five days away from you. I need to think. Alone. Without you injecting me with more pheromones."

Guilt washed over Ronan. He knew he was wrong, but he truly couldn't help it.

"Agree, but you must come back every night during the five days."

Lucien glared at Ronan.

"Are you nuts? I am not going to commute just so you have me to warm your bed every night!"

Ronan yanked at Lucien's arm impatiently.

"Lulu, we are mates," he emphasized every word. "Isn't it normal to want to be together?"

"It is," Lucien admitted. "But right now, I can't even look at you."

Lucien's every word was like a hammer swing that mercilessly slammed against Ronan's heart.

"Lulu..."

Lucien sucked in a deep breath and pinned Ronan with a cold glare.

"I will be at South Bedford City," the man announced while freeing himself from Ronan's grip. "I will rent a house near the art gallery so I can work on my new piece for the time being."

Despite Ronan's incessant pleading, Lucien packed some clothing and several necessities into a small luggage and left the Infinite Eclipse Pack House that morning.

Ronan wanted to take Lucien to South Bedford City himself, but Lucien briskly rejected his offer.

"The more you cling to me, the more I want to get away from you," he said ruthlessly.

The red-blonde man even forbade him from delivering him to the car.

All Ronan got was a door slammed in front of his face and Beowulf's neverending curses.

By the time Lucien arrived, a layer of snow already covered South Bedford City. Noah refused to leave him until he found the house he wanted to rent. The driver knew that Ronan would give him hell if he dared to do so.

Just before night arrived, Lucien finally found a suitable one. Just a hundred meters away from the art gallery, it was a small but cozy house for one person to two people at maximum.

A lone grandmother used to live there alone after her husband's demise. This Christmas, she planned to move to a home. Lucien even helped her with loading the boxes into the moving car.

"It is quite funny," she remarked. "I lived for 80 years but in the end what really mattered could fit inside a small car."

The elderly woman handed Lucien the keys to her house.

"You seem like a nice person," she said, her smile adding more wrinkles to her face. "Please stay for as long as you need to. There is no rush."

Lucien squeezed the elderly's hands and returned her smile.

"Thank you, Mrs. Wilson," he said. "For renting it to me last minute."

The old woman laughed.

"Oh, it's not like I need the money. I just want someone who can take care of my house."

She turned around and threw one last glance at her home for the past forty years.

"I am going to miss living in here so much," she whispered.

Lucien looked at the retreating car with a solemn gaze.

"But

well, life goes on. Best of luck, child."

When he entered the house, it still carried the traces that its previous owner left behind.

The elderly woman was a sentimental person. She kept a lot of pictures and a lot of memen tos. Although she was the only one who lived in the house for more than twenty years, Lucien could smell the faint scent of other people.

Her dearly departed husband. Her grown children and grandchildren.

Lucien set the luggage in the bedroom and went to the kitchen. He was starving.

Unfortunately, the refrigerator was empty and Noah already left.

Lucien thus put on his coat again and went to a convenience store to buy some instant noodles for dinner.

He especially picked the unhealthiest one just to piss Ronan off. Even though the Alpha was not there to scold him and throw away his bowl of noodles.

Strange, he thought.

He was the one who left Ronan on his own accord, citing the need to clear his head. He was also the one who missed Ronan after only a few hours.

Lucien sat in front of a steaming bowl of spicy chicken noodle soup. The red oil swam to the surface, screaming danger like poisonous frogs in nature.

He lazily stirred into the bowl using his fork, his appetite decreasing with every passing minute.

It was the pheromones, he thought, raising a hand to feel the bite wound on his nape.

Nothing else.

It was going to get better and better as long as Ronan did not come to disturb his peace again.

Lucien ate three mouthfuls before he could not eat anymore.

For some reason, the noodles did not taste as delicious as they did previously.

Lucien

was

enraged.

Ronan even managed to ruin a bowl of noodles for him.

The man went to the refrigerator to take out a cup of caramel and vanilla pudding. Impatiently, he stabbed into the heavenly goodness and scooped a spoonful into his mouth.

Well.

Lucien closed his eyes and sucked at the spoon.

At least the pudding still tasted good.

Thankfully Ronan did not ruin all the food for him, otherwise he would become livid.

While he enjoyed every bit of the pudding, his phone vibrated next to him.

Lucien craned his neck and stared at the notification on the screen.

There was a voice message from Ronan.

Lucien ignored it and continued eating his pudding.

Another came after three minutes.

Then another after two minutes.

Lucien pressed at his phone furiously.

Did no one teach Alpha Ronan the meaning behind the words "I want to be alone"???

The

first voice message played.

"Lulu, have you had your dinner? Do you like the rental house?"

And then there was the second message, a lot shorter than the first one.

"Lulu? I miss you so much..."

And then the third one, the longest of them all.

"Lulu, just send me one voice message, alright? I want to hear your voice. This is the first night you are gone. I can't sleep if I don't hear your voice..."

Lucien rolled with his eyes.

Then how did you sleep before I moved into your bedroom?

Lucien

sighed.

It's not as if he hated Ronan to the core. He understood very well that they were not a couple back then. Ronan could go and have s*x with anyone he wanted without notifying Lucien.

This baby was conceived during the period.

The

pup

was innocent.

The pup deserved to have a father and a mother.

Ronan and Lillian and the pup made a wonderful family.

Lucien was unable to see himself in this beautiful family picture.

That was not even what bothered him the most.

Lucien was afraid that Ronan would realize what he already realized the moment he saw Lillian in the memorial service.

That Lucien was inferior compared to the prospect of having a Luna and an heir.

That now that Lillian and the baby were there, Lucien was no longer necessary...

The man buried his face into his palms and groaned.

What was he supposed to do?

He could not just linger around shamelessly until Ronan sent him back to Silent Walkers Pack, could he?

Lucien could not take it anymore. Too much to digest for the time being.

Despite his low alcohol tolerance, he drank three glasses of wine just to knock himself out for the night.