The Girl Next Door
The Boy Next Door Chapter 47

F*ck.

Why did I agree to this?

Why did I even reach out in the first place?

Why couldn't I have left well enough alone?

I was perfectly fine living my life.

Well...maybe perfectly fine is something of an overstatement, but it was all good.

I sit behind the wheel of my BMW in a parking space on the street in front of the coffee shop somewhere in the middle of where we both live. It's about an hour away from school. The only other person who knows I'm here is Alyssa. I couldn't bring myself to tell Dad or Jenna. They probably would have tried to talk me out of this. Maybe not Jenna. I think she would understand. But Dad?

He definitely would have. He loves Jenna but he's salty about how Candance just walked out of our lives without ever looking back.

As I stare at the cream brick and the worn wooden sign that hangs over the door, I'm kind of wishing I would have given them the chance to change my mind.

I don't want to be here. And yet, I can't bring myself to turn the key in the ignition and drive away. I'm stuck.

Frozen in place.

Instead of exiting the vehicle, I grab my phone from the seat next to me and hit the contact at the top of my list. A few seconds later, the phone rings.

Just as I'm about to hit disconnect, a breathless voice comes over the line. "Hello?"

I clear the emotion that has welled in my throat and try to keep my tone light. "Hey."

"Hi, sweetie." Her voice warms, as if she's happy that I called. "How are you?"

"Good." That's a lie but I can't bring myself to tell Jenna the truth. Even though it sits perched at the tip of my tongue, waiting to burst free.

There's a pause. I can almost hear the wheels in her head turning. That little frown she gets when she's attempting to figure out the truth. Maybe calling her was just as bad of an idea as agreeing to meet Candance.

"Are you sure?" she questions carefully. "You sound strange. Like you've got something to tell me that I'm not going to like."

That's the thing about Jenna, she's has always been perceptive. Especially where I'm concerned. I might not be her own flesh and blood, but we've always been highly attuned. Instead of coming clean, I force out a chuckle. "Nah, it's all good. I had a little time to kill between classes and thought I'd check in and see how everything's going. It's been a couple of days."

"Oh, you're so sweet. You're lucky that you caught me when the kids are at music."

Right. I forgot that she's at school. "Oh, sorry."

She laughs. It's a soft tinkling sound that washing over me, immediately settles something deep inside. "It's not a problem. You know that I love talking to you. Even if it's just for a few minutes. Even though you're not far, it'll be nice when you move back here again and start working for your father. Then you can pop home any time you want. Or we can grab lunch."

That does sound nice. I've enjoyed my years at Wesley but it's getting old, if you can believe that. I'm ready to graduate and move on. I know some people don't feel that way. They want to cling to the party lifestyle. A few actually talked about coming back for a fifth year. Until their parents put the kibosh on that.

"So, what do you have going on for the rest of the day?"

I blink back to the present and stare at the coffee house in front of me. "Oh, you know. Class. Practice." I gulp. "Probably hit the library and study for a test."

"Sounds like college."

Yup.

When I remain silent, she says, "You sure nothing is bothering you?"

"It's all good." I feel like s**t for lying to her. If there's one person I'm honest with, it's Jenna. She's never judged me for anything. Not that she didn't hold my feet to the fire when I f****d up, but she was always there, no matter what. Can't say that about everyone.

I squeeze my eyes closed, allowing the sound of her soft melodic voice to wash over me. Two women hold importance in my life, and this is one of them. Alyssa is the other. It wasn't until she left the summer of our junior year that I realized just how spectacularly I f****d up our relationship.

It's almost as if she can sense the direction of my thoughts. "We enjoyed meeting Alyssa last week." her voice turns cagey. "Any chance we'll be seeing more of her?"

A smile tugs at the corners of my lips. "I hope so."

"Good. I'll talk to your father and we'll set something up soon."

"Sounds like a plan." I glance at the digital clock on the dash and realize that it's ten minutes past the time we're supposed to meet. "I should probably get moving."

"All right. I'm glad you called. Love you."

A thick lump settles in the middle of my throat as I parrot the sentiment back to her, meaning every single word. "Love you, too."

As soon as I disconnect, I pocket the phone, grab my keys, and force myself to exit the BMW. I grab a few coins from my pocket and add them to the parking meter before crossing the sidewalk.

One thick cement step.

Then another.

I pull open the door and step inside the small space. Air gets wedged in my throat as my gaze coasts over the tables that are crammed together. There are a few couches and chairs situated around a coffee table. Bright artwork decorates the walls. Music plays in the background. The atmosphere has a hip vibe to it. Most of the patrons look young. Early twenties or so. Definitely an artsy crowd.

It's only when my lungs begin to burn, do I realize that I've been holding my breath. It escapes from my lips in a rush as I decide what to do. No one here looks over the age of forty or what I remember Candance looking like.

So, it would seem like even though I'm late. She's later.

Or maybe she changed her mind and decided to pull another disappearing act on me.

How ironic would that be?

Instead of grabbing a drink, I head to a lone table parked in the back and settle on a chair that faces the door. Nerves skitter along my flesh as I slip the phone from my pocket and open the home screen. She's fifteen minutes late.

I'll give it another ten minutes and then I'm out of here. I've already wasted enough time on this. If her not showing isn't closure, I don't know what is.

Alyssa had offered to make the trip with me, even to just wait in the car, but I'd turned her down.

I'm regretting that decision at the moment.

I wish she were here with me. I wish I could reach out and grab hold of her hand. She's the one person who is able to settle all the chaos inside me.

Every time the door opens and the little bell above it chimes, I have a whiplash moment and everything inside me freezes only to realize that it's not her. I glance at my phone again. Twenty-five minutes late.

Why is this even a surprise. I should have fully expected that she would flake out on me.

You know what?

I'm done.

I'm not going to sit my a*s here and continue waiting around for a woman who walked out of my life when I was five years old. If I didn't realize it before, I do now. I never should have looked her up or contacted her.

As I make my way to my feet, the door opens and in breezes a blond woman with lavender highlights and large sunglasses covering her face. She's tall and willowy.

Just like I remember.

My mouth turns cottony.

Her gaze sweeps over the space until it collides with mine. She pauses. Even though I can't see her eyes behind the dark lenses, I can almost feel the way they sweep over me. I hold my breath as my heart pounds painfully against my ribcage. She moves through the tiny establishment, skirting tables until arriving at the table. She's so close that I could reach out and touch her if I wanted to. Resisting the temptation, I squeeze my fingers into a fist, so I don't do exactly that.

She hesitates. "Colton?"

That voice.

Deep and sultry. It's akin to burrowing under a warm blanket.

My throat closes up on me, making speech impossible. I jerk my head into a tight nod. There is so much tension filling the air between us that it feels like it could shatter into a million pieces. Uncomfortable has nothing on this.

She takes a tentative step toward me. "Would it be all right if I give you a hug?"

The question breaks the strange paralysis that has fallen over me. "Yes." The word gets blurted out before I can think about it.

Another step brings her close enough to slide her arms around my body. Even though I try to remain aloof, I replace my arms banding around her slender form, pulling her closer until I'm able to bury my nose in her hair. I squeeze my eyes closed and inhale, shocked to replace that she smells exactly the same as she did before. It's difficult not to tumble backward into the memories of the past.

They are like a wave crashing over me as I'm inundated with images I'd forgotten about. Time becomes irrelevant. I have no idea how long we stand embracing. Her warmth seeping into me. All I know is that it feels good. Good enough to ease some of the pain that has been a part of me since she walked away.

When we break apart, her fingers trail over my arm before tangling with my own. I stare down at the physical connection. The one she's initiating. Even as we slide onto our chairs, our hands stay connected.

She stares at me from across the small round table that separates us as if trying to catalogue every minute detail and commit them to memory. "I can't believe how handsome you've become. But then again, you always were an adorable child." She reaches out and traces her fingers over my cheek before they settle on my chin. I remain silent as she turns my face first one way and then another. It's so tempting to close my eyes and sink into the warmth of her touch but I'm afraid to do that. I'm afraid if I blink-even for a second-she'll disappear, and this will end up being nothing more than a dream.

"It's so good to see you again. I'm glad you reached out."

My head bobs as I frantically search for something to say but nothing comes to mind. I have no idea where to start. This woman is my mother. My flesh and blood. Her name is on my birth certificate. She cared for me during those first five years. And yet, she's a relative stranger. Someone I haven't seen in fifteen years. And this feels...awkward.

"I've thought about reaching out for a while. Thank you for taking that first step."

"No problem."

Her fingers tighten around my hand. "I'm really happy that we could meet up. I've thought about you so much over the years, but I was afraid to reach out. I didn't want to disturb your life."

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