The Woman in the Windowsill
Twenty One

~~~

Claire’s face is shocked when she sees me at the front door.

“Brett? How are you feeling?”

“So far so good.”

“I hope you are, did you get the flowers Rafe and I sent to you?”

“Yes I did, they were beautiful. I kept them right next to my cot the entire time.”

“I’m glad. I don’t really have time to chat today thought Brett, I’m sorry.”

“Oh that’s fine Claire. I just wanted to go through and grab some of the stuff I dropped off here last month if that’s fine.”

“Well sure honey, Rafe will take you up to the attic!”

Rafe and I exchange pleasantries and he and I head up into the attic. It’s very large, large enough to stand. He uses a flashlight to lead the way as we try to replace the box of Camila’s belongings.

“Hey Brett”, Rafe says, lighting a cigarette.

“Yeah?”

“I didn’t know you were that sick. If I did, I never would have acted that way.” He takes a long drag off his cigarette. As if it conveyed that his words were genuine.

“Please, Rafe, don’t worry about it these things happen.”

“No, it’s not okay. I always hated you son. I hated you because of how much you loved my daughter. I know it sounds stupid but it’s true, I was jealous.”

“You had nothing to be jealous of Rafe. She was always a daddy’s girl, we both know that.”

“Looking back. It was a blessing to have a son in law like you. If my biggest problem with you was that you were so damn in love with my daughter, I suppose that’s a good problem to have.” He replaces the box and hands it to me.

“Rafe.”

“What is it?”

“We’re a family. We always will be. You know that.”

He pats me on the back as we make our way downstairs. I wave goodbye to Rafe as I head out towards my honda. For the first time in a long time it’s not raining out. It’s actually somewhat sunny today.

When I’m home I go through the belongings and I replace Camila’s cellphone. It’s dead so I hook it up to a charger and start it up. I go through the contacts in the phone. Eventually I come across Jason Dryer in the contacts.

~~~

Jason didn’t live far from me. He owned a house about six blocks from my apartment. I sat in my honda outside his house for about a hour before I finally decided to head up his driveway. His house wasn’t anything special, just a typical middle class three or four bedroom one story house. I make my way up the small trail leading to his front door.

I take a deep breath and rap on the door. No answer. I rap on the door again. Finally, a red headed woman answers the door. She is in a bathrobe, and it looks like she just crawled out of bed.

“How can I help you”, she says as she fixes her tangled hair.

“Hey, how are you? Is there a Mr. Dryer here?”

“Jason? I didn’t realize he was expecting company. I’ll go fetch him for you. May I ask who you are?”

“My name’s Brett. I’m an old friend. Just figured I’d see how Jason is doing while I’m in town on business.”

“Hmm”, the woman replies. “Well come on in and take a seat on the sofa. I’ll go fetch him”.

The lady leads me into the house and motions toward the sofa. The house is nice, I can tell Jason took care of what he had. I take a seat on the brown sofa and observe the surroundings. He’s a painter too, it appears. His projects hang around his living room. Some of them range from landscapes to models. After a while I hear heavy footsteps come from the back room.

There he is. Jason walks into the living room and takes a quick glance at me. He’s a big man, tall and muscular. He sports a ponytail full of thick brown hair along with a tight white t-shirt and jeans. He analyzes me. “Figured this would happen eventually”, he says. He extends his hand out.

I take it and shake his hand. “Figured what would happen?”

“I take it you want to have a talk.”

“You could say that”, I say.

“Drink?”

“Sure”, I say.

Jason disappears off into his house for a second and returns with a bud light and takes a seat on the other side of the couch. We both crack open the beer and take a drink. We sit in silence for a while, and finally Jason breaks the silence.

“What took you so long?”, he asks.

“Didn’t really feel the need to, until today.”

“Before you say anything, I know what Camila and I did was wrong. It wasn’t fair to you.”

“Didn’t stop you though, did it Jason?”

He takes a deep swig of his beer and exhales. “You want to hit me? You want to get what you’re owed? I can understand that.”

“Something like that”, I say.

“Well you won’t get a fight from me. I know I deserve it. I know you were a good guy, she told me everytime. She’s fight the guilt, but I always got her to give in.”

I turn and stare at him with cold eyes.

“I hope you don’t think we did it to spite you Brett. It wasn’t like that at all.”

“Then what the fuck was it like?”, I raise my voice.

“She came in here. Almost a year and half ago, next week. She wanted a painting done of her and her parents, if I remember right. I do freelance painting”. He points to his projects adorned on the walls. He takes another swig. “But, the chemistry between us lit like a match.”

“This is wrong.” My voice is raised and angry. My nails are digging into the armrest. But I decide to hear Jason out.

“We were just perfect for each other, you have to understand. We fell in love quick. But we didn’t do anything. Not at first Brett. She respected you. She was going to file for a divorce before she and I ran off together.”

I put my hand over my face.

“If you don’t want to hear about it, and do what you came here to do, that’s fine Brett.”

“Go on”, I tell him. “I’ll decide what I think when I’ve heard your end of the story.”

He looks puzzled but decides to go on. “But we couldn’t stop ourselves. I found her here almost every day while you were off making big bucks and seeing your friends. She felt neglected Brett. I started to teach her how to paint. We decided one day that we were going to take off into the sunset.”

“You sleep okay at night? Taking another man’s… taking everything from him?”. My emotions are almost unable to be contained.

“That’s not how we looked at it. Brett you’re a hotshot at a corporation. We figured you’d replace someone else. Probably quick too. Look at me? I work with what I got. When you’re like me and you replace the one. The one you want to live with forever. It doesn’t matter who you got to fuck over. She loved me. I loved her. We were meant for each other.”

I take a sip out of my beer.

“But then she got sick. She found out she got sick and she couldn’t do it anymore. She chose you.”

I still don’t make eye contact with him. I just pretend I’m staring at one of his paintings. I’m furious though.

“She chose you Brett. She wanted to live out the rest of her life with the one she began her journey with. She didn’t want to start another. I know what I did was wrong. But I’d do anything to be with her, don’t you understand?”

“Yeah, I do.”

“When I heard she passed, I lost it. I just stuck to painting.”

“Looks like you moved on.” I motion towards the back end of the house where the red headed lady must be.

“That’s just Kate. I’m doing a portrait of her. We keep it strictly professional.” He twirls his bottle around in his hand. I’ll never replace another woman like Camila. For the brief time we were together, I felt like nothing could get to me. I haven’t been with a woman since.”

“You really cared for her then, didn’t you?” I can barely stomach the words.

“She was my everything.”

“She was carrying your child”.

“What?”

“Yeah. It was your kid, the entire time.”

“She told you? Before…”

“Something like that.”

Jason sits back and sinks into the sofa. Now he’s in anguish. “I always had a feeling it was mine.”

“How’d you cope?”, I ask

“I just kept going. I knew that Camila wouldn’t have wanted me to stay depressed. She’d have wanted me to move on. She was always like that.”

I nod and take another sip of the beer. I glance at him twirling his bottle in his left hand. Something shiny catches my eye. He has a rhinestone bracelet on. It’s the exact same as mine.

He turns to look at me. “I’m so sorry Brett. I didn’t mean for you to get hurt. I know I was wrong. I just hope you can forgive me. If not, I don’t blame you. You and I both know though. She’s worth everything.”

I turn and nod at him one last time. I get up and head for the front door. Jason doesn’t say anything to stop me. I contemplate why I came her once again. I decide not to go through with it. I walk out and make my way to the honda. Quietly I take a seat behind the wheel. I dig in to my waistband and toss the pistol into the passenger seat and drive off.