When bitter&sweet meet -
°2•The reason
Here I am, in my old room. I lie on the ground still in my wedding dress, crying over and over until there isn’t a single drop of tear that remains in me. How could he? How could she? Why did I not see this coming?
I hear a knock on the door. “Honey, are you okay?” My mother asks me through the door.
Okay. Aye. I don’t even know what that word means anymore. I was okay until this morning when I thought I would marry him. Great, I can’t even say his name now.
“Honey? Tory?” My mother persists.
“Leave her be, Rose. She’ll come out when she’s ready.” I hear my father come to my rescue.
“I’m worried about her, John. I just want her to be okay.” I still hear them talk as they walk away from the door.
I look at my bed, and the memories of that night come back to me as if it was yesterday. After the prom, I sneaked him into my room. I felt so rebellious that night. I never did such things before. Anyway, we spent that night together. It was that night that I lost my virginity.
I look around once more with the memory still in my head. Why did I decide to come back here again? To dwell more on the past? To cry more? What? Why? I slap myself mentally for my decision to come back here.
“Honey, I made you a bath. It will make you feel better.” I forgot how my mother is persistent when she wants to.
“Okay, mom, I’ll go and do that.” I love my mother, I do, but right now, she’s annoying.
I get myself up and look at myself in the mirror. I try to unzip my dress, but I can’t reach the zipper. I want to take it off. I so badly want to take it off of me. “Mom. MOMMY, HELP!”
I hear her barge into my room. “Take it off, mom, Take it off,” I say to her, panicking.
My mother hurriedly helps me to get it out of me as she unzips my dress. When I feel the dress fall to the ground, I don’t waste a second to fall into my mother’s arms as I cry again. I don't care if I’m only in my underwear as she hugs me. All I need right now is my mother’s comforting arms. That’s the reason I came here, because deep down, I knew I needed her, needed them both.
“What’s going on? I heard Tory screaming.” My father barges into my room without knocking.
“DAD!”
“JOHN!”
We both yell at him at the same time.
“Sorry, I didn’t know.” He steps out of the room as fast as he comes in as my father sees me in my underwear.
So embarrassing. I definitely didn’t need that.
Mother was right. A hot bath is all I needed, for now, at least. I wonder if one day I will be okay again. I know one day I will be, but right now, I don’t see it.
My Mother was right. A hot bath is all I needed, for now, at least. I wonder if one day I will be fine again. I know one day I will be, but right now, I don’t see it.
My thoughts are interrupted as I hear a commotion downstairs. I hurry to put some clothes on to see what’s happening.
Was that my father yelling?
As I run downstairs, I can hear what’s going on more clearly.
“I said get out of my property. My daughter doesn’t want to see you.” I hear my father snarl.
“Mr. Summer, with all due respect.” What is he doing here?
“Respect! Respect! Boy, you don’t even know what that word means, not after what you did to my daughter.” I see my father gets angrier by the minutes he’s talking to Davis.
I don’t like to see my father like this. I walk closer to him. I put my hand on one of his shoulders. When he senses me, he turns to look at me. “Darling, let me handle this.” He closes the door in Davis’s face so he doesn’t see me.
“Dad, it’s okay. You no longer have to fight my battles for me. I’m an adult now. I have to do this.”
“You’re my daughter, and it’s my job to protect you. I don’t like this, so if you need me, I’ll be in the kitchen.” That’s all he says before he places a kiss on my forehead and leaves me be like I ask him to.
I look at the door, knowing what's waiting for me on the other side. I’m not ready to face him. I take deep breaths to calm my nerves because my heart is beating so loud that I’m sure he can hear it.
It’s time to get this over with. I think as I open the door.
Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
“What the fudge do you want?” I'm not particularly eager to use bad words.
He looks at me, and I see he didn’t expect me to be on the other side of the door. Maybe he expected my father, not me.
Davis clears his throat. “I brought you the things you asked for.” He shows me my bag. The one I left at the chapel.
“I asked Judy to bring it to me. Not you!” I say to him as I rip the bag from his hand.
“I need to talk to you.” Davis dares say to me.
“Need. Need. I don’t care what you need.” I raise my voice, being careful at the same time so my father won’t hear me.
“Tory, please.” He insists.
He dares say please to me. I’m about to tell him what I think of his please when I look up and see Mr. Anderson comes out of his house as he looks at us. I don’t want to make a scene in front of my parents’s neighbours.
“Fine, let’s talk,” I say as I step outside and pick a chair as far away from him as possible. As I sit, I see Mr. Anderson waves his hand, and I wave back before he goes back inside. Davis takes my silence as an invitation to talk.
“Let me begin by saying how sorry I am.” He moves his hand to grab mine, but I pull them away so he can’t touch me. He sighs at my reaction.
“I don’t know where to begin. I don’t want to hurt you more. It’s pointless. I know because whatever I say to you, the situation won’t change, but I need to do this.”
“The first time it happened, it was a mistake, and we decided it would be the only time it would happen. One thing led to others, and it lasted two years. A week before our wedding, I ended it with Katy because I wanted to spend my life with you. I love you. I love you both.”
“I was ready to marry you because you are the one I chose, but she came to me today to tell me she was pregnant, and I couldn’t let her do it alone. We didn’t want you to replace out like this. We both love you.”
“That’s it, that’s your big speech? Let me tell you one thing, fuck you, fuck both of you.” I get up from my seat and leave him without saying another word.
He was speechless when I left him. It’s the first time I’ve used that word. Maybe now he knows how pissed off I am with both of them.
I can’t help myself as I look out the window and watch Davis get in his car and finally leave.
Then it hit me, Katy’s pregnant. They’re going to have a baby. One day I will walk through this town and stumble into the three of them together.
No! No!
I can’t be here as I see all three of them walking down the streets. It will crush me even more. My parents will understand. It’s decided, I have to go. I have to leave this town and start fresh.
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