Wild West of the Heart
FORTY EIGHT

"Fuck

this"

Ola cussed, looking out through his window, still in his pajamas. It was an hour to noon, and of course, he couldn't go for the school dance.

He was grounded. Even till now, still grounded.

He had been through his examinations. He had his phone taken, and privileges revoked. It made him sick initially, like the type of sick where he was well above a forty four degrees celsius. It was because of the change, he didn't get to jog or take his morning breath of fresh air. He didn't get to call Fi for one of their midnight calls where they'd stay awake talking about life, love and friendships.

But never about themselves. Never about what they were and meant to each other. Just like Obi and Abdul did, these two were falling in love with each other. But neither had the courage to say.

Which made them no different from the latter.

Like i was saying, as bad as his fever was, this also had it's upside because it gave him more time to read and focus on his exams which all went pretty good after biology.

It was Ola, he was more than an average student so it was expected that he did well. But like those days, when he'd retire to his bed after school-

-here he was, the day of the Christmas eve dance, locked in his room. Now, Bade was yet to replace out she lost yet another character in the school play but it was not his fault. Ola thought he might manage to convince his mother over the thought of a boring ass play, when deep down he just wanted to see Fiyin. But he couldn't.

Actually he could, but it wasn't up to Mary to make the final decision in anything. So he was stuck there, muttering each cuss word after the other. The static voice from the radio rang into his ears as he walked to his bed.

Ironically, the room was even more messy now that he spent most of his days in it. Sometimes, he'd just lay there, not asleep. But maybe meditating or something. And these days, he took a liking to the old fashioned radio because it was the only device that wasn't confiscated from him.

And if he wasn't listening to that, he'd try to take his mind off how abusive this confinement was, and taking his mind off that meant thinking of something that actually made him feel good. And you could guess what that was. Who that was. He thought of her often, as he touched himself. In an attempt of self-reassurance, that he still felt something. Days locked in here, made him feel numb and though he had an idea what he had done, Akin had never outrightly put it to him. He was the one that put two and two together that Dare had come looking for him or to visit.

He fucked up by putting his addresses instead of Mira's and it was only now he knew it. Because he didn't want to lie. Why did he have to lie?

Why did he have to feel regret?

Why was he forced to be remorseful for doing something that was right? These questions only pointed to the fact that Akin was not a happy person. A long shot guess, he was a narcissist.

And unlike the rest of Nigerian fathers, all he wanted was control. Demanding respect that was meant to be earned. Now, Ola knew that since his father hated him since he got back from Texas. Ever since he found out what he'd done.

But after months of beating up himself about it, he had come to terms that it wasn't as bad as everyone made it seem. But then again, these were the people that saw Jazzlyn's lifestyle as a sin. In return, Ola hated his dad as much as he hated him.

And Mary chose to stay out of it until that day.

He grabbed the radio in his hands, placing it by his bed stand. He'd heard the news of the cosmic theory, the moon and mars aligning beautifully as a sign of goodluck. But unlike Mira and Fiyin, he didn't feel so strongly about the idea. If anything, he just didn't care. He just wanted to leave this place before he'd lose his mind.

"Tears flowed freely yesterday, as traders lamented losses after a midnight inferno gutted a section of the popular Balogun market in Lagos" The radio cleared, an effeminate narrating such tragic news. "Sources said the fire incident started at midnight and is still currently burning with fire fighters trying their best to contain the blaze_"

He was intrigued by the news as he sat on his bed.

"Traffic remains unbearable in major locations on what now seems to be a tragic christmas eve. And the Lagos State government has sympathized with the masses, advising them to stay home, spending this time with family. They have also refuted any claims on knowing what had started the ghastly fire. And investigations are set to begin by thi-"

He turned it off.

He didn't need this today. And as intrigued as he was, what he wanted more was to just leave. His eyes grazed the windows and he looked away, shutting down any impulse at that moment. His mind went to Obi and how he was to journey to the same part of the island that was on fire.

Not that he could reach him or anything. But then his eyes went to the window and he looked to his closet. He had one suit he wore a for homecoming dance in Texas and the windows were quite easy to climb out. He mentally did the maths

knowing he would be dead if Akin found out. But the rebellious side of him, wanted him to.

Because what was the worst thing that could happen? What was worse that spending hours at a stretch, locked in your room?

Not that he could even hate him any more.

So he did the most logical thing and climbed out of his bed. Placing the radio to the side, he ran to his closet and there it was. The tuxedo James had given him for the dance. The material was silk and and a shiny blue. And he had the perfect shoes.

What was missing, was his date-

-

who at that time had a date, but he didn't know.

"Fuck my life. Where's Joseph? Where's Abdul and the rest of the wise men?" Bade yelled with the playwright script in her hand.

Now she was frustrated as she peered at the halls from backstage. There was a crack in her voice and her hair was a mess. Fiyin wondered the back, her eyes focused on the one line she was to say while Bade lost her mind. Nothing was going right, and there was a whole hall filled with people anticipating the annual reenactment of the play.

It was where Hillway High thrived, and the whole city often looked forward to out drama presentations. That sort of pressure was what seemed to break Bade, who was on the verge of a meltdown. Fiyin dropped the papers, and walked halfway across the stage. "You know what" She whispered and she looked to her.

"It's a flop. We know by now"

"God we don't even have anyone to play Joseph" Bade eyed her, not knowing where she was going with this. "At least let it be a beautiful kind of flop. One that will make it seem intentional "

"I mean, i could be Joseph" Fiyin offered, looking over to the costume, hanging next to where the choir was rehearsing their fifth number.

"Hark the herald's angel sing"

"But you're a woman" Bade'a voice cracked.

"So?" Fiyin asked her. "It's just a fucking play. Rather than have you play Mary by yourself" She added. "But Olamide?" She asked.

"I just " She shook her head and Fiyin reached for her hands. It was in the moment that she didn't even give her next words much thought. "I know"

"Trust me, i understand but he might have his reasons" Now Mide hadn't told a single soul of what he was going through at home. To be honest, no one did. No one liked talking about how rough and toxic their household was, to prevent the pity eyes and the unnecessary sympathy.

And besides, he wasn't even sure how toxic the entire thing was. It was so bad that at some point, he actually begun to regret writing the statement.

At some point, he was caving into what his father wanted. But he soon got himself, and this single act of rebellion to show he was nothing like him.

To prove himself, that he was nothing like him. He climbed down the patio without a single thought behind his eyes and he ran to the roadside with a suit on. With a few hundred nairas, he'd hoped to get a can which was relatively more expensive and less time consuming than the bus.

But in his defense, he wasn't about to go on a queue with these luxury tux. He found a yellow striped one to his school and he hopped in, hoping he'd make it just in time.

But no one had any idea he was even coming. So as the clock struck noon, Bade handed the costume over to Fiyin. "Okay. Be a good Joseph"

Fiyin smiled proudly, taking it and she ran back with it. She couldn't wait for Deb to see her, she was probably in the auditorium, having already performed the first number alongside the rest. She slipped on the large tshirt and held the hat close.

Joseph didn't strike her as a cowboy hat kind of person, but then again, no one really knew what he looked like. What they knew was that he was a good father, just as he was a good husband.

She began to think of how Mary actually was. And how not many people had a conventional family these days. Not many people had that now.

It was as if the world had grown out of her own happiness. All these intrusive thoughts fazed her mind as she put on the costume. She was familiar enough with her bible to know the few lines she had. And with that, she heaved a deep sigh before walking into the prepping corner.

"Are you ready?" Bade blazed. And there was a low unconvincing yes. "I said, are you ready?" She yelled, louder enough this time and the back stage raged with some hitting on the drums.

"Now go kill it" She said, blood draining from her cheeks as she grabbed Fi's arm. "Thank you" She nodded to her. "Go crush it" She smirked.

"Please not baby Jesus. Herald already tried that" She made the infamous joke as the huge curtains gave way to the stage and the applause of the masses. Fiyin was never a drama person, her whole life she'd always hung behind with Anna and the dolls, making excuses about being too cool to act like someone else.

But deep down, she wanted this. And now, she had this. In a year that took alot from her, she was finally taking something that she wanted which was a lead role in the school play. Which was not only one that bent the gender construct, but one to be broadcasted statewide. Now Collins would see her face now, more than ever.

She as well, would.

So she heaved a sigh, stepping forward to the voice of the narrator. "Joseph, father of Jesus" She bowed, before sighting Deb in the crowds.

They both squealed at each other before she calmed. And then she cupped her chin once the lights went off. "Mary" The angel ran across as everyone took their place. "Awake, Mary-" He urged. And if you're familiar with this story as well as the butterfly effect, you'd know it was this encounter that birthed the idea of christianity.

To be continued...