A Single Lifetime | Novella
hourglasses and clocks

“I have a ton to do,” Fajr announced once she gobbled the last slice of pizza. “I’ve got to study for my exam and my bedroom is a mess. Sura asked me to go over our Scrabble scores once more, and I was sloppy this evening so I’ve got to practice. My vocabulary is dead.”“Anything else?” her mother asked with a small laugh. “You should sleep. You spent nearly three hours playing with words.”

“Can’t sleep now,” she objected. “We’re going to watch a movie first.”

“Find more time travel movies?”

“No, but I found one from the twenties.”“Oh to live in the nineteen-twenties,” Zareen swooned, letting her shoulders fall. “I just love classics.”Fajr stared blankly at her mother while she held the remote in her hand. “Amma, I meant the two thousand-twenties.”

Her mother blushed with embarrassment and shook her head. “Sometimes I forget how much time has gone by.”Before Zareen could say anything else, Fajr pressed Play and chewed the corner of her lip as something tightened in her stomach. The two would usually eat leftovers or order from local restraunts all night long, but Fajr suddenly lost her appetite.

Sometimes I forget how much time has gone by…

On the table in front of her, they had placed an hourglass that would run out in two hours, the duration of the movie.

“Hey, remember when we agreed to watch all the best hits from the eighteen hundreds to present day,” Zareen reminded, nudging Fajr in the elbow. Unaware of the stress growing at the pit of her stomach. “We couldn’t even make it to the two thousand-tens.”

“Yeah…” Fajr recalled with a chuckle as she stared at the screen, not even paying attention to what was going on in the film. “There were so many movies…” she said, barely audible.

“What was that?” Zareen said, eyes glued to the television.

“Nothing…”So many movies…

Sometimes I forget how much time has gone by…

Instead of turning her face towards the movie, Fajr found herself staring at the hourglass. Wondering how many grains of sand it had and much it would take to finish this movie.

“You fell asleep, Fudge.” Zareen didn’t sound vexed, just muffled. Like she was talking from the other room, but really she was sitting right next to her, sounding hoarse and tired.

“What?” Fajr said, knitting her eyebrows.

“That’s what you just asked me.” Zareen’s eyes widened as she stretched her arms to bring life back into them. “Fudge, you were talking in your sleep. You asked me what happened? And–” Zareen yawned, getting to her feet as Fajr felt numb in her knees. “–how did I spend my time tonight?”“Did I say that?”“Your exact words,” Zareen confirmed. A sound broke the silence outside, calling everyone to pray and marked the beginning of the day.

Fajr felt bile rise in her throat and she stumbled towards the kitchen. She opened the fridge and drank straight from the bottle, emptying half of it to push down her dinner.

“I should’ve woken up. I had so much to do,” she said, shaking her head as her voice broke. “We slept till morning prayers.”“Hey, don’t be so hard on yourself,” Zareen advised, knowing what her daughter was about to do.

“I need more time,” she repeated under her breath as spasms worked their way up her arms.

“Calm down…”Fajr grabbed the hourglass from the living room and studied it. It had obviously run out a long while ago. She took it and placed it upside down again. “I just need two hours.”“To do what?” Zareen shot back, her lips a thin line with her fingers digging into her palm.

“I have an exam in a few days and I...I had a list of other things to do…” Fajr bit her nails, thinking about stopping time and just as she did Zareen grabbed her hand.

“What did you do?” Fajr asked, turning to her mother.

Zareen let her shoulders fall. “Fajr, we’re simultaneously using our powers. We’re in the same time bubble…”“Why would you do that, Amma?” she added, feeling guilty all of a sudden. “I would’ve been fine on my own–”Zareen squeezed her daughter’s hand and Fajr flinched as she realized she was still holding it. “I didn’t want you to be alone.”

The sound of clocks ticking slowed down in the time bubble and Fajr was able to properly bring air into her lungs. She had missed praying besides her mother. They didn’t even keep track of time(or the amount of coffee they drank), Zareen just watched Fajr complete her tasks.

“This is never going to stop, is it?” Fajr said, looking up from her textbook. “I’m still going to be like this. It’s like this is built into my bones.” Fajr pulled back her hair, nearly pulling it out as her eyes became glassy. “I was designed to worry and to be a miser when it comes to time. I’m greedy. I save time like people save money.”

“That’s not true,” Zareen said, clicking her tongue slightly. She spoke slowly and her voice was calming in the silence. “You’re not saving time, you’re actually using more of it this way. And, I know that doesn’t make you feel better, but it’s the truth. You’ve always been like that. You’re a perfectionist, you want things done on time. At exactly the right time. Let me tell you, living in a time bubble segregated from the rest of the world is not a life. This isn’t the way life is supposed to be.”

“I know,” Fajr admitted as two tears rolled down her eyes and she tried to stop them by not blinking. “But, I don’t know what to do anymore. The more I try to not use it, the more I replace myself needing too.”

“If I ever made you feel guilty about using your powers, I’m sorry,” Zareen started. “And, I never told you to stop using them, but I had to do something because I was afraid you were going to make this permanent.”

“It wouldn’t have worked out anyway,” she confessed, crossing her arms. The morning light was frozen in the sky and the sun rose at the slowest pace. “Just another theory. All these years, I collected hourglasses and clocks and never left the house without a watch...because I never wanted to feel like I was behind. So I never had an excuse to be late.”

But the hourglasses and clocks had become her worst enemies. They taunted her every time she had a panic attack, and she felt like they were staring back at her as if they were mocking her. “I hear them ticking, Amma. Still, I can hear the clocks ticking. That’s what I hear every time I’m doing something and I’m always worried about how long I’m taking...who does that? I’m a freak! Sura and Zain probably think I’m a lunatic because I time every little thing…and I don’t blame them…” Zareen reached out and squeezed her daughter’s hand, hanging onto it. “It’s in our nature to worry about it. You’re not the only one. And, I’ve met your friends, they don’t think you’re crazy. There’s something like that about all three of you. You’re peculiar because of your time management skills–” Fajr laughed through her tears at that, her eyes getting crusty underneath her glasses.

“Sura still has nightmares about the fire,” Fajr finished. “And, Zain is socially inept.”“And, there is nothing wrong with any of that,” Zareen added and her daughter nodded in agreement. “Partially, I am also responsible for this…”Fake sat up and, without a hint of sarcasm said, “Oh, please don’t feel guilty for passing down the fabulous genes.”

“Not because of that,” Zareen said. “When you were younger and you needed more time to do something, I used to tell you to put a stopwatch on it. I would tell you to use your powers.”“Because I was too afraid to use them at first.”

“My, my, how the times have changed,” Zareen mumbled.