Alec’s -
Alec’s CHAPTER 89
Chapter 89
I’ve never really thought about my death. Sure, I’ve experienced losing someone, or specifically my parents, but I have never really thought about my own death. Never thought about what dying would be
like.
Do people really think about dying? Yes, I know there are some who plan everything in case something happens to them. There are those that plan their burials way before their death… I guess the reason why I never thought about my death is because I can’t bear leaving those I love behind.
My mind quickly flashes to Aspen. I turn and look at her peaceful face as she sleeps. She’s so young and so full of life. I can’t imagine leaving her behind. I can’t imagine not being able to watch her grow.
My heart grows heavy at the thought. I feel like someone has it in a tight fist, and it’s being squeezed. I can hardly breathe as I think of not being there for her. It brings me physical pain just imagining it.
Then there is Rave, King, Beth and my pack. I’ve grown attached to them. It’s hard to imagine letting them
go.
“Sadie?” I pull my eyes from Aspen and stare at Raven. She has become more than a friend to me. She has become a sister.
Like I said, I’ve never thought about my death, but now I have to, because if Raven is right and that wasn’t a dream but a premonition, then it means I’ll probably be dying soon.
“I don’t like this,” Raven says, shaking her head.
“You can join the club,” I say with a sigh.
Was this how it was meant to be? Was I meant to die this early in life? There is something about knowing something like this. Knowing you might die. It puts you in a certain kind of sour mood.
“I want to believe that it is just a dream. A bad dream,” I begin. “It would make it easier to brush it off, but
now…”
I leave the words hanging as my throat clogs because the words get stuck. I just hate this so much. I wish there was another explanation to it. One that didn’t involve me dying.
I know why Raven came to that conclusion. It’s normal for deities to communicate with us through dreams. They don’t always send their messages through oracles. Sometimes they communicate directly to us through our dreams.
Once again, I try to get through to Nyx. I am hoping that she will tell me something, anything really. Her walls are still up though. There is no way for me to get through to her when her m**al blocks are up.
Sighing, I sit down on the bed and run my hand through my hair. I feel exhausted. Both me**y and physically. I just wish that things were easier.
“Don’t stress too much.” Raven sits down beside me and takes my hand in hers. She squeezes it reassuringly. “Maybe this is a good thing?”
I frown and look at her. “How, Raven? How is this a good thing?”
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on, then your goddess is trying to help you. I think that maybe she’s letting you know happen because she wants you to change it. Remember that destinies aren’t always written in You can change it
My shoulders Sump as I think about her work. A glimmer of hope begins to form deep inside my soul.
Maybe this is the reason why you had it, so that you can stop it from happening,” she finishes.
I just stare at the wall, thinking it over. Can you really change something like that? Can you really stop death? Where or how will you even start? It soumis easier said than done.
Let go of Raven’s hand and begin pacing. I was so antsy that it was driving me to the brink of madness. I feel like nothing has gone my way since three years ago Since I ended up in bed with Alec.
I had so much going on that I didn’t know where to start or what to do. It was starting to get too much, and I am starting to hate it.
I stop in my tracks as it suddenly hits me like an over-speeding train.
“What?” Raven asks, squinting her eyes as I turn to face her.
“Nyx told me that I need to prepare for what’s to come. That I need to get stronger and learn to use my powers. In my dream, there were dead bodies s**ed around and blood soaked the ground. What if Nyx meant war? That I need to prepare for the war that is coming?”
She’s quiet for a while before her eyes widen. “Oh, my goddess. The other woman was there, meaning whatever will happen is between you and her.”
“And for there to be war between us, there must be beef. Which makes me wonder what exactly is going on. Nyx is mum about the whole thing, so I have to try and figure things out on my own.” I tell her, trying to keep the panic down.
Even as I think about things, I can’t help but wonder if something went down between me and the other female… but when I think about it, I don’t really know the woman. How can I have a problem with her or her with me when I don’t even know who she is?
Unless, like, I’d suspected, Nyx is older than I thought she was, and whatever problem exists is between that other female and Nyx. That is the best explanation. The only one that makes more sense.
It would also explain why Nyx is insistent on me training and knowing how to use my powers. It would also explain why she always seems to know so much. I swear, the wolf knows more ways to fight than anyone alive should know.
Then again, if Nyx is older than I had suspected, then it means she probably had another host. What happened to that human? And how old is she exactly?
“Do you believe in reincarnation?” I suddenly ask, Raven.
“No, why?”
“Just wondering about Nyx.”
“Do you think she’s reincarnated?” she asks, her curious eyes studying me.
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