Awakening (2 book series) -
Awakening – Rejected Mate Chapter 20
Colton? Why're you in my head? I blanche and press my hands to the sides of my skull and slump back down to put my face between my knees. To continue trying to regulate my breathing once more, confused he linked after the two-week silence of rejection I've just endured, and still caught up in my own meltdown. I told you. I can feel you freaking out. You're afraid. What is it? Tell me. If you need me, my help, I need to know where you are. What's happening.
The sob that bursts from my throat as he says the words I have been longing to hear since I last saw him, breaks me all over again. That care and need to protect me, because despite rejection, he still has the urges of a mate. I blurt out my worry and break into over emotional terrified tears, fueled by knowing I'm a freak with blood colored eyeballs.
My EYES are RED!! I think there is something seriously wrong with me. I snort, and wail into the emptiness of my room, gripped with actual devastation. Really not all too focused on the fact that he's actually talking to me, because this is bigger, scarier, and overwhelming.
Jesus Christ, Lorey. I thought something was actually happening to you. Don't do that to me! Stop Crying! The sharp alpha tone of dominance winds me and I instinctively obey. I choke, and then cough on a tear, that had been mid flow when he hit me with that crap. Instantly enraged as pain of my body shutting off my emotional response, momentarily winds me, forced out of a real heartfelt need to cry by a bossy a*****e abusing his gift.
Don't use that tone on me! Don't tell me what to do! I snap back, bristled in fury, forgetting myself as anger bursts forth, stunning me into immediate silence as I clasp a hand over my mouth, despite saying nothing verbally.
He's not my mate anymore, but a dominant in our lands and talking back like that could get me seriously messed up if he saw fit. It's disrespectful on so many levels. No one of my standing would ever, should ever, snark back at an Alpha.
I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. I backtrack like a total coward and start to whimper as tears begin to freshly fall all over again. A combination of my previous panic setting in and the sheer devastation of talking to him like this once more now that my faux pas has shaken sense into me. It hurts more than I can bear.
It doesn't matter. Calm down, I'm sorry, I just needed you to stop... listen to me, Lorey. I knew about your eyes, remember. There's nothing wrong with you. The Shaman, he's been researching all this time. Just try not to let anyone see in the meantime, until I know what it means. There've been others, but none you will replace in the history books. The Shaman doesn't know why, but you have to keep it under wraps and stop freaking out. Do you hear me? You almost gave me epic heart failure coming through like that. I wipe my face and try to pull myself together, exhaling heavily to steady myself and sitting upright forcefully. A little soothed by what he said, enough to rationalize and stop acting like a complete idiot. Bringing my attention to the fact that when he's in my head, things feel less bad. My pain subsides enough to function with even this kind of connection to him.
I didn't mean to project on you. I swear. I wasn't trying to reach you; I know how things are between us. I sound like a pathetic whiny child, and it just drives home how non-Luna I am.
This wasn't you. We're bonded. When you're afraid to that extent, hurt, anything like that. I'll still feel it, no matter what we do. Just try and be rational. Hold it together.
I guess it works both ways, not that big tough Colton Santo probably ever gets freaked out or scared. I doubt I'll ever feel any extremes from him on my end, he's way too mature and battle seasoned for any kind of hysterics.
What if I'm sick? I pout petulantly, not really all that settled with his explanations and still mulling. Shaking now the shock is settling in and sniffing my mess away.
You're not sick. I would know. He almost chastises me, as a paternal tone takes over and I try not to picture his face as his voice surrounds me. It already hurts enough to hear him; I don't need a visual reminder on top of that.
Then what if I'm cursed and this is how you know. Red's the color of danger. Maybe I'm a walking hex! I point out, a real ounce of possibility in that. I mean, it's me after all. According to our kind, all of you in that home are cursed... are their eyes red too? I swear that was a hint of sarcasm, a warming in his tone to suggest humor, but I let it slide.
Okay, then, what if I'm not really a werewolf and I'm something else? The silence that stretches out between us makes me shudder and the panic once again soars. OH my god, that's it isn't it?!?! I squeak, unleashing a god-awful noise in the process and jerk upright, eyes widening as that fear hits me low in the belly once more and I lurch to my feet to pace erratically.
NO! No, okay. I was considering it, but that's dumb. There are no others like us, so it's not that. Besides, I saw you turn! You're a wolf, a pretty one at that. Colton soothes, if somewhat bossily, yet it seems to work, and I exhale heavily and stop walking around in manic circles. I blush at the wolf remark, even if I know he's probably trying to be nice to pull my head out of hysteria.
Hmmm. How do you know there aren't other wolfy type beings? I push, voice strained, fear still lingering now my brains on this path to self-analysis. Heart rate climbing higher and my feet itch to start walking again.
We imprinted; pretty sure two different species can't do that. Fate wouldn't allow that. It's insane. You're the same as me, Lorey, trust me. We'll figure this out. I hate that despite everything, his deep soothing tone, and sexy voice has a commanding ability to make me feel that he can make everything okay. That he's in control and there to catch me.
It's not your job to figure this out. There is no we. I remind him sullenly, that familiar pang I've been carrying for weeks comes back to nestle in my chest and my fear subsides, overpowered by my longtime companion and shadow. Heartbreak.
Lorey...... It's a soft, regretful whisper of my name, that tears my heart strings. He doesn't get to finish whatever it is he's going to say, when a deafening, painful, scream; so insanely loud, high pitched, blood curling in its reverberation, tremors through the house and vibrates everything around me. My head, my body, my brain, and the surrounding forests, shake and stutter in such a way that my whole-body spasms aggressively. It turns my blood to ice instantly, frozen still in fear, and catapults me out of my own head like a vicious eject button that sends me crashing to the floor heavily.
It's the loudest, most painful noise I've ever felt in my life and the overwhelming nausea and agony it inflicts on me in that moment sends me reeling across the floorboards, scrambling nails on slippery surface, to fight the penetrative pain of my brain near exploding. In a crumpled heap, gasping in terror. It feels like something physically swept through the walls, like an invisible wall of power and chaos and rendered me completely useless.
What the fuck? What the hell was that? Lorey? Lorey... answer me? Colton's panic-stricken tone dances through my mind but I'm still reeling from the internal vibrations consuming my every nerve ending, from that god-awful noise which seems to be pulsing around me as my senses fade in and out. My body twitching and I don't feel right at all.
It's done something to me. I'm weak and unable to move, barely able to breath as though all my organs are struggling to fight the pulse or function. Pulling myself slowly to lay flat on my belly, I try to haul myself to the door. Head pulsating with the aftereffects of whatever that was, brain bruised and throbbing, and though it's no longer blasting, I can feel something in the air around me. Like an invisible thick smog holding me down, swiping my ability to get up, as though it's sucking all the oxygen and energy away.
Colton, something's wrong.... I can't get up. I gasp for air, head swimming with stars and darkness invading my vision, trying so hard to pull myself up. I'm wracked in pain and have no strength to fight it. I'm powerless, and as the effects of whatever that was have rendered me completely useless, I lose the ability to link to Colton too. Feeling him drop out of my head on my end, as though my gift ceases to be before blankness fully smacks me in the face and I pass out.
If you replace any errors (non-standard content, ads redirect, broken links, etc..), Please let us know so we can fix it as soon as possible.
Report