Behind The Alpha Book 4 CASS
Chapter 9

(Chapter song ‘Knocking on Heavens Door’ by Guns ‘N Roses)

CASS

Jesus. This can’t get any better.

A love bug? Are you kidding me? My heart can’t take it.

I’m looking over at her every second as I drive back to my place. I need some things before we go to Nala. Her and Curtis went back to Phoenix so, I want to make sure my Love Bug will have everything she needs for the trip.

I watch her as she rests her chin in her hand, looking out the window. I try to figure out what she’s thinking in that gorgeous head of hers.

What’s a love bug think about? Besides love, I guess. There must be loads of stuff. What a cool creature to be. What I wouldn’t give to be that. I definitely have a lot of love to give. I want Ember to have it all, she’s just a little standoffish right now. I’m sure I can wine and dine her and she’ll come around. I just have to keep at it.

I look out the windshield of my Audi and reach over, placing a hand on her thigh. I give it a light a squeeze and smirk. She whips her head to me and I bounce my brow as my smirk turns to a smile. She looks down, grabs my hand hard and lifts it off her.

“OW…OW…OW…” I cringe. Damn, she’s strong.

“Don’t…touch me!” She growls.

“Ok! Sorry!” I practically cry.

She tosses my hand back to me. “How long?”

I scowl and shake my hand out. “Fifteen minutes.” I grumble.

“Hurry.” She turns back to the window.

“Ok.” I twist my lips and look out the window.

I pull into my pack house and park. The lights are off except over the three car garage. I see Kevin’s Jeep in the driveway.

“Where are we?” Ember turns to me as I stop the engine.

“My house.” I smile.

“What? No. We need to replace the tracker. We can’t…” She starts getting excited.

I hold up my hand. “We will. It’s just late and my friend is two days away.”

“Ugh. I’ll just blink us there.” She throws up frustrated hands.

“No. It’s too late and I need sleep. Please.” I tilt my head forward and eye her.

She lets out a groan. “Fine.” She throws open the door and gets out.

I walk around and escort her to the front door. I make sure I open it for her and glide her in. “Welcome to Casa de Cass.” I chuckle as I turn on the hall light and throw my keys in my pocket. She walks in with her hands in her back pockets, looking around. She looks so damn sexy in the low light, standing in my house. She looks like she totally belongs here.

“Huh.” She says.

“Huh? What…what’s that?” I ask as I take off my jacket and hang it up.

She spins around. “Nothing. I just expected something a bit…prettier.”

“Prettier?” I step to her. “Do you want it prettier. I can make it pretty…Anything you want…Just ask.”

She puts up a hand. “No. Cass…I was just making an observation.” She looks at me confused.

“Oh…” I look to the kitchen. “You hungry? I can make a salad or something…” I say as in walk. “I think we have some veggies in here somewhere. Kevin just went shopping…”

“No…yuck. I hate vegetables.” She scrunched her nose.

I open the fridge as she sits at the island. “Oh. Ok. I just figured you being a bug, I thought plant based diet.”

“I’m not a real bug, you idiot.” She leans on the counter top.

I lean on the counter in front of her. “Ok. So what’s a love bug.”

“We are the ones that kick your ass...when…you…Alphas…just…don’t…get…it…” She stood up and banged my forehead with her palm as she said her words.

I shoot back. “Ow…what?!” I scowl and rub away the sting.

She sits back down. “We’re that little tick in the back of your stupid brain that says “LOOK AT HER!” I help Alphas like you replace the love you deny is there.”

I lean back down. My brow comes together as I think. “Ok. I think I get it. So, you shove people together who otherwise would never be together.”

“Wow. There is a brain in the love mushed head.” She nods and the corner of her mouth ticks up.

I stand up and go to the fridge, pulling out some grapes. I’m not really hungry because whatever Ember did has been occupying my mind and my stomach. I drop the bowl on the counter between us. “Ok. So what’s Cupid do? There is a Cupid right?”

She picks a grape off the pile and pops it in her mouth. My eyes immediately watch her chew it and my heart skips beat as her jaw line flexes.

“When he gets things right? He matches hearts that belong together. When he gets things wrong, they call me.” She eats another grape.

I put one in my mouth. “So you’re a clean up crew…Catch…” I hold up a grape and toss it to her. She leans and catches it in her amazing white teeth.

She nods. “Yep. Eros has some issues, so we can’t have the wandering hearts running around. They have to be matched.” She picks one off and tosses it to me. I dip down and catch in my mouth and smile.

“Ok. So, next question.” I lean, pick a grape and toss it a bit closer. “Why so violent?” I raise my head and brows slightly.

She picks one and plays with it a bit. She tosses it high and I get under it. “I don’t know. I just don’t have a lot of patience.”

“I can definitely see that.” I feed her the next one. “Why? It doesn’t seem like a trait I would expect from someone surrounded by love.”

She looks down. “Loves messy. It’s crazy. Makes you do stupid things. Make dumb decisions…” She kind of trails off.

I hand her another grape and try to replace her eyes. “You…seem to know a thing or two about that.”

She looks at me and our eyes lock. She takes the grape from my hand quick, tosses it in her mouth and stands. “Um…no…It’s just the job. I don’t love. I just see the idiotic things people do for it and…it pisses me off. We…we should sleep.” She looks around.

“Right.” That was a pretty fast retreat for job issues. Just more pieces to the puzzle. “Let me show you to the guest room.”

I walk her down a hall to the right of the kitchen and stop at the second door on the left. “You can sleep here and I’m just last door down the hall. If you need anything, just call.”

She steps in. “Sure. See you in the morning.”

“Yeah. Um…Listen. I just wanted to say…that kiss…”

She shut the door in my face before I could finish. My face falls. “It was great.” I mumble. I bite the inside of my lip and turn to my room. My hearts still beating hard for her and it’s killing me that she’s not in the same room, but she’s strong and independent. I feel like I should give her space. I just feel so much for her, I need to get this out somehow.

Instead of going to bed like I should have, I change my mind and go to my office. I sit at my desk, pull out a piece of paper and pen and write. I wrote for hours. Balling and throwing paper, trying to replace the right words. Words that will hopefully show her just how I feel.

The sun starts the crack through the trees surrounding my house when I hold up the paper in front of me. I read it and bite my lip.

I hope she likes it.

“Cass!”

“In here!” I call out.

Kevin walks in. “Cass. Why is there a hot red head demanding coffee in our kitchen?” He thumbs over his shoulder.

I smile, fold the paper and stuff it in my pocket. “That…” I walk up to him. “Is Ember.” I grin.

“Ember. Are you kidding?” He arches a brow.

“Nope.” I smile more.

“Wow. Cool name.” I walk past him. “What’s she doing here?” He asks my back.

“She is…” I have to think about what I’m telling him because I don’t think he’d believe me, first of all, and something tells me Ember wouldn’t like me spilling her private information to just anyone “Someone I picked up at the bar last night.”

Kevin joins my side. “Ok so why do you look like you haven’t slept?”

“Because I haven’t. I was up all night. Thinking about…” I side eye him and remember all the lectures he's given me. If I tell him I’m in love with her, he’ll flip out. “The pack vettings.”

He stops me with a backhand to my chest. “Wait. You had a hot, fiery redhead under your roof and…” He scrunches his face and tilts his head. “You worked?”

“She’s a guest. Not a hook up. Go make coffee for the lady.” I eye him.

“Man.” He sighs and shakes his head. I can see what he’s thinking. He’s wrong. “Ok. Coffee coming right up.”

I walk out and Ember is sitting in the common room, picking at her nails. The sunlight through the windows just adds to the pink glow around her.

I slow my steps as I approach. My breathing becomes shallow. I got to know her a little bit last night and now I can’t get her off my mind. I mean, she was always there since the kiss, but now it feels a bit deeper.

My eyes wander up her boots on my coffee table to the curve of her thigh. I watch her neck move. She has her bright red hair up in a messy bun and she’s wearing a t shirt. She looks irritated and tired, but fuck is she not the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen.

I think about the words in my pocket. I want to give it to her, but then I think about what everyone’s been telling me lately. I’m suffocating. Too demanding. If I want her to stay with me. I need to be that distant guy that Luke was talking about. The problem is fighting the pink haze in my brain. The one thing that’s telling me to rip her off the couch and kiss her hard.

“Hey. Coffee.”

My thoughts are broken by Kevin in the kitchen.

She looks my way and our eyes lock. They’re so heart wrenchingly amazing. I don’t know what a love bug truly is, but I know I want this one in the worst way.

“We should get those to go.” She mumbles. She stands, picks up her jacket and throws it one.

I smile. “Right. Got to go see a man about a horse.” I chuckle.

“What?” She asks as she fixes her hair.

“Nothing.” I walk to the kitchen and make two travel mugs. I walk back to her and hand her one. “Milk and sugar ok?”

She takes it from me. “It’s…um…perfect. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” I smile softly at her and I think I see a little one behind her cup.

I think I might just have a chance here.