Between Two Worlds
Despair

We continue to walk, searching for the mysterious creature. Funny how, when I didn’t want to replace it, it was always nearby. And now that I want to replace it, it seems rare and elusive. I don’t know how we are going to replace this thing. I thought about suggesting that we look outside the city, on the other side of the boundary, but there are too many problems with that idea. How will we know exactly where the security panel is? How will we know the password? (Harmony had briefly mentioned in one of the classes that the boundary for the city defense is password protected so that not just anyone can come in and take down the city’s defenses.) I guess Kat could hack into the system and get the defenses down. She could probably figure out how to work the cameras and the sensors too. But my biggest fear... what if hundreds of those creatures live outside of the city? I shudder at the thought.

My breathing is short, and my heartbeat is rapid. I feel like I just ran several laps around our building, but in reality, we have been walking at a steady pace for the past few hours. “I need a rest.” I spot a large gray rock sitting in a green meadow. The rock stands tall. Once I’m standing next to it, I realize what I thought was a large rock, is actually a part of a large cavern. I sink to the ground in the rock’s shadow, not far from the entrance to the cavern.

“Okay, no problem. Are you feeling sick or just tired?” Kat asks, concern evident in her voice.

“I’m really tired. I think a nap might help. I guess I’m not as fine as I originally thought.” I sigh and stretch out. “Kat?”

“Yes?” she asks, sitting down beside me.

“What are we doing?”

“What do you mean? I thought you got your memories back. We are hunting down the final clue.”

“And then what?”

“And then we become Dini with all the privileges associated with that.”

“What’s the point?” I ask feeling grief and sorrow starting to weigh me down.

“I don’t understand.”

“Why am I even here? Why am I on this planet? Altair once said that he had a special arrangement with the Ghemin, so that he would be notified of certain ‘experiments’. What does that mean? Why me? I’m basically just a normal human. Sure, I survived the dangers of Earth. Sure, I survived the experiments the Ghemin conducted. But to what end? Why am I even alive right now? How did I survive the experiments when so many other humans died? I don’t understand.”

“I don’t have all of the answers, I told you that once before. But what I do know is this.... you aren’t human, Rayanna. And you didn’t come from the planet called Earth.”

“What do you mean? I am human and I came from Earth. I may be questioning my identity but one thing I am not questioning is what species I am and what planet I am from.” I say annoyed.

“Look, we are friends, right? I need you to remember that.” Kat says. She sighs like a mother telling her child for the thousandth time not to do something.

“Well, yeah, we are friends. I know that. But it doesn’t change the facts.”

“No, it doesn’t. You can get mad at me all you want to, but the one thing you need to know is that you are mistaken. You are not human, and that planet wasn’t Earth.”

“Why do you keep insisting on saying that? If I wasn’t human, then what am I?”

“You are a Femlander, you were born on the planet, Son’us. Fifth planet from the sun,” she says.

“No,” I say.

“What?”

“No. You are wrong. You are lying to me.”

“Why would I lie to you? Just think about it for a moment. You have your Earth facts correct... What color is the grass supposed to be?”

“Green. It’s green here too.” I say looking around. Light blue grass springs up from between the rocks. “Well, in some places it is.”

“And what color is it on the planet you are calling Earth?”

“Brown, but it’s that way because of a nuclear war. Everyone had to flee the planet, and when we returned the Ghemin had taken over.”

“No, dear. There was no nuclear war. The grass was always brown on Son’us. I have seen the planet for myself. Your people were born on the planet, but you never achieved the technology to leave the planet. ‘The Ghemin’ as you call them are the humans, not you.”

“What? I don’t understand. Why would... how could... but we called our home Earth. Why?”

“I imagine the earliest humans missed their planet and started calling your place Earth. Somewhere amongst the intermingling, your people adopted the new name as well. As the human technology evolved, it’s my understanding that they refused to share it. That they started keeping their cities far from the cities of your people. And then at some point, humans did what humans do, they decided to try and better their selves through experiments on the weaker race, which was your people.”

“How do you know all of this?” I ask as confusion clouds my mind. Not human? Is that even possible?

“I’ve worked around humans a few times. Humans have this thing for bragging about everything they do. It’s a really annoying character flaw. The one thing I can tell you is that humans aren’t covered in fur like you are. They are basically hairless except for the tops of their heads, and a few have hair on their face.” Kat explains.

I look down at my own body. While I have long hair on my head, like a typical human, the rest of my body is covered in a layer of matching brown fur. If I’m not really human, then everything I have ever believed in is a lie. So, who am I? The sorrow that surrounded me before, is now crashing down around me and I feel as if I am drowning. “I’m tired,” I say to Kat. I lay down and close my eyes. Is she lying to me? If she is, then why? What would she accomplish by lying to me? She’s never lied to me before, at least not as far as I know. Now, what do I do?