Break My Heart: An Enemies-to-Lovers Coach’s Daughter Sports Romance (Western Wildcats Hockey)
Break My Heart: Chapter 23

I drop my stick into the holder by the door and head straight to my locker with one thought dominating my mind.

Ava Philips.

Ever since she walked in on me naked a few weeks ago, she’s been living rent free in my brain. It started out as curiosity, and now it’s turned into something I can’t shake no matter how hard I try.

“All right, team, gather around!” Coach Philips’s voice booms across the locker room, snapping me back to reality.

I turn, joining the guys as we form a loose circle around him. Despite everything between me and Ava, my respect for her dad is unwavering. The man’s a legend. He played most of his career in Chicago, and now he’s coaching us to the playoffs.

But damn, seeing him brings a tidal wave of guilt, knowing I’m thinking about his daughter in ways he wouldn’t like.

“We’ve worked hard all season to get here,” Coach starts, his voice commanding our attention. “But now it’s time to dig deeper. The playoffs are a different beast. Every shift, every second counts. You’ve all proven you can hang with the best. Now it’s time to prove you are the best.” He pauses, eyes scanning the room, and I can feel his words settle over us like a weight. “Remember why you’re here. For the love of the game, for your teammates, for the fans. You wear this jersey with pride. When you hit the ice, leave everything out there. No regrets.”

A roar rises from the team, our adrenaline already kicking in.

“Wildcats on three!” Ryder calls out. “One, two, three—Wildcats!”

The chant reverberates throughout the room. Even as we break away, it doesn’t take long for my thoughts to drift back to Ava. She’s been in my head all day, and I need to see her. Need to feel that connection again, like I did this morning.

I unlace my skates, carefully setting them in my locker, while the other guys toss their gear aside without a second thought. Most of my teammates have no idea what it’s like to hustle for hand-me-down equipment. I don’t take the university’s gear for granted.

By the time I strip down and hit the showers, I’m already thinking about heading over to Ava’s place.

Colby knocks my shoulder on my way out. “Hey, Van Doren, you down to grab food with the guys?”

I shake my head. “Not tonight, man. I’ve already got plans, but thanks.”

Colby, the nosy bastard that he is, arches a brow, all too interested. “Plans, huh? Who’s the chick?”

“No one you know.” I keep my answer vague. The last thing I need is for the guys to catch wind of this. It’s not that I don’t trust them, but word spreads fast in the locker room.

For Ava’s sake, I’d rather keep it under wraps a little longer. I can’t help but glance at Coach’s closed office door.

My teammate’s expression turns gleeful. It’s like the guy can sniff out a lie within seconds of it leaving my lips.

“Oh, really? Why don’t you give me a name, and we’ll see just how true that assessment is?”

Yeah, that’s not going to happen.

Can you imagine if any of these guys found out I was hanging out with Coach’s daughter?

Maybe “hanging out” isn’t quite the right term for it.

But I still won’t be sharing that with Colby.

As soon as I shove my feet into my shoes and grab my bag, I stride from the locker room.

“Hey, where are you going? You didn’t answer the question! Inquiring minds want to know who you’re spending time with!”

I give Colby the finger before disappearing through the door with a sigh of relief.

Those fuckers I call my friends can be relentless.

Ten minutes later, I’m standing at her door, knocking. I’ve never been so impatient to see a girl. My pulse speeds up with each second that ticks by.

What if she’s changed her mind?

What if she decided this—us—is too much?

Before my brain can spin further out of control, the door swings open. Ava stands across the threshold in black leggings and a cropped pale-blue sweater that shows just enough skin to drive me crazy. Her hair is still up in a bun. My fingers itch to take the tie out and watch the golden mass spill down her back.

Every time I see her, I’m bowled over by her beauty.

No. Not just her beauty. Everything about her.

“You look amazing.”

“Thanks,” she murmurs. “Want to come in?”

It doesn’t take long for the tension we always seem to generate to crackle in the air like an impending storm. She leads me to the couch, and we settle a few inches apart. Her hands twist together in her lap as she glances at me and then away.

The only need pumping through me is the one that demands I put her at ease.

I reach out and cover both her hands with my larger one. “You know we don’t have to do anything, right? I meant what I said the other night. We’ll take this at whatever pace you need. I’m not in a rush.”

She releases a breath, and her shoulders sag, as if a heavy weight has been lifted from them. “I don’t understand you at all.”

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t know,” she mumbles. “I didn’t expect you to be so nice. Or thoughtful. Or understanding.”

“Well, I guess with the right person, I can be all of those things.”

When her gaze lifts to mine, her eyes are filled with doubt and something else that pulls at me. “Are you saying I’m the right person?”

Unable to resist, I slide her onto my lap until her thighs straddle mine. My hands rest on the gentle swells of her hips before pulling her a little closer so I can feel the heat of her body nestled against me. Her breath hitches, and her lips part slightly as our gazes cling.

At every turn, I’m falling deeper for this girl.

“I think you might be,” I admit, the words feeling more real than anything I’ve said in a long time.

Her hands slide upward to my neck before her fingers thread through my hair. “Can I tell you something?”

I nod as my heartbeat picks up tempo. “Anything.”

I want to know every little thought that pops into her brain.

“I haven’t been able to stop thinking about how you kissed me this morning.”

Her words send a jolt of heat straight through me. “I’ve been thinking about it too. More than I should.”

I’ve had plenty of girls whisper the filthiest things imaginable in my ear, but none of them have turned me on the way Ava does while admitting something so innocent.

It makes me realize just how different everything is with her.

How much she matters.

For the first time in my life, I want to take care and make sure the person I’m with doesn’t get hurt.

I want to do whatever is necessary to protect her.

Even though we didn’t know each other before, I wish it were possible to go back in time and keep her safe.

I’ll do the next best thing and put her needs above my own.

She leans in and brushes her lips against mine in the faintest, sweetest kiss. It’s as if I’m sinking further into something I didn’t realize I was already too deeply entrenched in to escape from.

My hands tighten on her hips, pulling her closer as our kiss intensifies. Her lips are soft, her breath warm as she moves against me, and for a moment, everything else falls away.

Her past.

Her doubts.

My own guilt about Coach.

None of it matters at this moment.

When she shifts, brushing against my erection, I bite back a groan.

There’s no doubt about it. This girl will be my complete undoing.

And you know what?

I’ve never wanted anything more.

Just like earlier this morning at the ice rink, heat flashes in her eyes, turning them darker. My cock stiffens as she repeats the movement.

“I like the way it feels when I slide against you,” she whispers, mouth hovering over mine.

“You’re killing me, Tink.”

Her lips lift into a smile.

That’s the moment I realize I’ll do whatever it takes to keep that expression on her face.

There’s never been a girl who’s made me want to think long term, but that’s exactly what happens when we’re together. The scary part is, I might be the only one doing it.

I remind myself to slow my roll.

We have time to figure out what this is.

“Sometimes I think about walking in on you in the locker room.”

“Tell me what you’re doing when you think about me.”

She draws her lower lip between her teeth. Just when I think she’ll refuse to answer, she says, “Touching myself.” Her brows pinch as frustration flickers in her eyes. “But it’s never enough to get me there.” She glances away. “Ever since Nathan… I just can’t seem to…” Her voice trails off as heat gathers in her cheeks.

“Get off?” I palm her backside, squeezing and massaging her ass. “That’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”

“I know.” Sadness weaves its way through her tone. “It just sucks. I hate it.”

I search her face, wondering if there’s more she isn’t telling me. “Are there other issues?”

When her gaze darts away, I slide my fingers beneath her chin and gently turn her face until there’s no other choice but for her to look at me.

“Tell me. Whatever it is, we can work through it together. I promise.”

She releases a shaky breath. “This is so humiliating.”

“It shouldn’t be. How can I help if I don’t know what you’re struggling with?”

After a few silent moments, her shoulders wilt. “I think what I like might be a little fucked-up.”

“That’s doubtful.” My fingers stroke the silky-soft skin of her jaw. “Give me an example.”

Her teeth scrape across her lower lip before she whispers, “I like when there’s kind of a thrill to it.”

A thrill?

I blurt out the first thing that comes to mind. “Like having sex in public?”

She nods.

Her admittance has my cock hardening even more than before. “Okay. Nothing strange about that. Plenty of people do.”

This time, her words come a little easier. “I like being spanked.”

“Who doesn’t?” Even though I’m not bored in the least, I force a yawn. “Anything else?”

Her brows rise. “Anal. I’ve always wanted to try it.”

Well, fuck.

“Sometimes I like to use toys.”

It’s entirely possible I just came in my boxers.

I shake my head in genuine confusion. “There are a lot of people who enjoy those things. Why would you think any of it makes you fucked-up?”

Color flags her cheeks. “Because Nathan would tell me what a dirty little whore I was for liking everything he did to me. He made sure I knew no one would ever be able to get me off the way he did.” She presses her lips together before admitting, “I think he might be right.”

Air leaks from my lungs in painful little bursts.

If I didn’t already hate the bastard for what he put her through, her soft confession would do the trick. I’d like to wring his neck for planting these ideas in her head. He introduced her to sex and then made her feel bad about it.

It’s so twisted.

It takes every ounce of self-control not to swear a blue streak.

Instead, I cup her cheeks and force her to meet my steady gaze. I need her to see the earnestness in my eyes. “There’s nothing messed-up about you, baby. And there’s certainly nothing wrong with the way you enjoy having sex when it’s between two consenting adults. He’s the one who was messed-up in the head. Not you.” I draw her face close enough to brush my lips across her forehead. “Never you.”

A shuddering breath falls from her lips. “Thank you.”

“For what, baby? I haven’t done anything but tell you the truth.”

“You’ve done a lot more than that. You’re the first person to tell me there isn’t anything wrong with what turns me on. That it doesn’t make me some kind of deviant.”

“The last thing you are is a deviant.” I hold her cheeks in my palms. “Do you hear me?”

“Yeah.” Her eyes search mine. “I’ve told you all the things that turn me on. What about you? What gets you off?”

I flex my hips. “I think you can feel that everything you just mentioned gets me hard.”

For the first time since this conversation began, a small smile lifts the corners of her lips as she rubs herself along my erection.

“Do you ever masturbate? Or is that a stupid question because you can pretty much have sex whenever you want?”

“It’s not a stupid question. And yes, I jerk off.”

Her eyelids grow heavy as she continues grinding against me. “When was the last time you took matters into your own hands?”

“This morning after class.”

“Did you think about me?” Her voice dips, becoming low and husky.

“You’re the only one I thought about. The only one I’ve been thinking about since we met.”

A devilish glint enters her eyes. “Good.”

When she shifts again, a tortured groan escapes from me. Whether she’s deliberately trying to or not, this girl shreds every bit of my self-control.

“You know what I like most about masturbation?” I say more conversationally than I’m feeling.

She shakes her head.

“That there’s no need to worry about someone else getting off. It’s all about what you like and how you feel. You get to be as selfish as you want with your pleasure.”

Her smile fades. “I wish it were that easy.”

“It is. Maybe you just need someone to guide you through it.”

Her eyes widen. “You would do that?”

“Only if you wanted me to.”

“Wouldn’t it be weird?”

“Of course not.” Before I have the chance to think about the offer, it’s out of my mouth. “We could do it together.”

She stills. “Really?”

“Yeah. We don’t have to make a big deal about it.” When she remains silent, I blurt, “Maybe I shouldn’t have brought it up. The last thing I want to do is make you uncomfortable.”

“No. I don’t want to forget about it. I want to do it.” She sucks in a deep breath before expelling it from her lungs. “And I want you to help me. But I want you to do it too. Okay?”

“Yeah, babe. It’s okay. I just want you to be sure before this goes any further. That’s all.”

“I am.” She untangles her arms from around my neck before her hands float to the hem of her sweater. In one swift motion, she yanks it up her body and over her head before dropping it to the carpet.

Even though it’s tempting to glance at her nearly-naked chest, I keep my gaze focused on her face. I’m trying so hard not to look down that I don’t realize she’s reached around her ribcage and unsnapped her bra until the silky straps slide down her shoulders and arms. She plucks the material away before it joins the crumpled sweater on the floor.

My gaze dips.

Oh fuck.

I force my attention back to her face.

One of her hands drifts to my cheek before stroking the line of my jaw. “Aren’t you going to look?”

“Do you want me to?”

Any moment, my tightly strung control will snap like an over stretched rubber band.

At this point, it wouldn’t take much.

“Yes, I do.”

I inhale a sharp breath and almost choke on it.

Only then do I allow my gaze to fall again. Holy mother of God, she’s got the most glorious breasts. They’re small and perky. The perfect handful. Before I realize it, I’m reaching out and cupping each one in my palms. My thumbs stroke over her nipples until they stiffen.

She whimpers as she arches into my touch.

I flick a glance upward to meet her eyes. “Are you one hundred percent positive about this?”

“I am, Hayes. I’m sure.”

“Okay then, hang on.”

Before she can ask any further questions, I drop my hands from her breasts and slide them back around to grip her ass before rising to my feet. With a gasp, her arms twine around my neck as her legs lock around my waist. Her mouth is so close that the warmth of her breath feathers across my lips.

It’s a dizzying sensation.

One I want more of.

I swing toward the short hallway. Before I can move a muscle, there’s a knock on the apartment door.

Our heads swivel toward the tiny entryway.

Her brow furrows. “Ignore it.”

As soon as I take a step, there’s another, more insistent knock. “Expecting company?”

“Not that I know of.”

“Want to answer it?”

“Not really.”

When there’s a third knock, Ava swears under her breath. “Fine, I’ll answer it.”

My lips tremble with a smile at the frustration pouring off her in heavy waves. If I’d wanted to rekindle the spark from earlier this morning, that mission has been accomplished with flying colors.

Our gazes stay locked as she slowly slides down the length of my body before her toes touch the floor. My cock is painfully hard as she swings around and picks up her bra and sweater, slipping both on in record speed. Only then does she pad to the entryway.

“Let me see who it is.”

I step into the hallway, so I’m out of sight, before readjusting my erection.

With a huff, she yanks open the door.

“Hey! What took you so long? I was just about to have Colby break down the door to make sure you were all right.”

Recognition slams into me.

Britt.

“Oh. Ummm… sorry. I was in the bedroom and didn’t hear it.” There’s a pause. “What are you doing here?”

“We’re heading to Blue Vibe to dance the night away. You have to come with!”

And apparently Willow.

So not only are Colby and Britt here, but Willow and Mav too.

Well, shit.

That throws a definite wrench in the works.

“Oh… that sounds fun, but tonight’s not good for me,” Ava hedges, trying to turn down the invite without rousing too much suspicion from her friends.

“What are you talking about? Of course it is. This is exactly why I didn’t bother calling first. I knew you’d try to bail.” Before Ava can say anything more, Britt continues. “A guy from my psych class is going to be there, and I want to introduce you. His name is Jack, and I think you two would really hit it off.”

Um, excuse me?

Over my dead body is that happening.

Before I can think better of it, I step out of the shadows and stalk to the door. Maybe Ava wanted to keep this on the downlow because of her father, but her friends need to understand that she doesn’t need help replaceing a man.

She’s already got one.

“Plus—” Britt’s voice comes to an abrupt halt as soon as she catches sight of me.

Once I’m directly behind Ava, my hands settle possessively on her shoulders. “That won’t be necessary,” I tell her, just so we’re clear on the situation.

Britt’s eyes widen. “Well, this is one plot twist I didn’t see coming.”

A slow grin spreads across Maverick’s face as Colby mutters, “No one I knew, my ass.”

Willow beams as she puts two and two together. “Perfect. Now both of you can join us.”