two
“I wouldn’t intentionally hurt anyone in this whole world. I wouldn’t hurt them physically or emotionally. How then can people so consistently do it to me?”
Beatrice Sparks, Go Ask Alice.
I get home in record time, opening the door to a quiet house. My parents wouldn’t be home until the early evening, so I had plenty of time to put a load of washing on and clean my uniform. While at it, I grabbed the laundry hamper from the bathroom and dragged it to the mud room, where our washing machine and dryer are kept. Pulling my uniform out of my bag, I spray cleaning liquid on my blouse and hang it to rest until I can do a load of whites, and I throw the rest of the colours with my remaining uniform into the machine.
I’m not the type to skip class, and I feel awfully guilty for doing so. I’m an average student, but I’m not exceptional. Sighing, I walk into the living room and switch the television on to watch some daytime soap operas.
- I wonder where Sera is – I hear my mother’s voice in my head.
“I’m in my room!” I yell out. Mum opens the door to my room and peers inside.
“You heard that, huh?” she asks.
“Yeah,” I reply, turning my phone off and looking at her.
“How was your day?”
“It was okay.”
- Liar – Mum says in my head again.
“Okay, it wasn’t that good,” I state, looking down at my lap. I feel Mum sit beside me on my bed, her warm arms wrapping around me in a hug.
- Tell me what happened – Mum’s voice says in my head.
“Catherine…” I reply. Mum pulls away from me and turns my head towards me.
“She did this to you?”
I nod, wiping the tears from my face and flinching at the pain on my face.
- What did the teacher say? -
“Nothing much. Just to stand up for myself,” I reply, shrugging. Mum gives me a small smile. There’s nothing much to say. Catherine and I were best friends before we started high school. Then we had a falling out. Catherine began to develop boobs and curves, while I didn’t. She started getting attention from the boys, and the girls wanted to be her friend because of this. I… being flat-chested and not getting my period until I was fifteen, was left out. I didn’t fit in, and so… the bullying began.
“Well, your wolf is coming in, so… hopefully, this will heal quickly, huh?” Mum says, looking at me sympathetically and gently touching a bruise on my chin.
“How do you know my wolf is coming in?” I ask. My birthday isn’t for another three weeks.
“You heard my thoughts earlier, and I’ve been asking you questions through our link.
“Oh.”
“After dinner, your dad and I will sit down with you and teach you how to control this power, okay?” Mum asks, going to my door. I nod in agreement and watch her leave the room, taking her sweet work smell with her.
I help Mum by setting the table up for dinner before going over to Dad and giving him a hug.
“Hello, baby girl. Mum said you had a tough day today, huh?” Dad asks. I just nod; my bruises speak for themselves. Dad just nods but doesn’t add his opinion to the matter.
“How was work?” I ask my parents as we sit down for dinner. Mum has heated up a frozen lasagne and garlic bread for dinner, and we’ll also have the leftovers for tomorrow night.
“It was good; no issues with the line,” Dad says, and Mum nods in agreement. Both my parents work in an ice cream factory. The factory is owned by the pack and employs a lot of humans, and some werewolves, like my parents. But we don’t eat ice cream at home because they work with ice cream. Mum and Dad say it’s because they see and smell it enough during the day that they just want to escape it when they’re not at work.
“Sera had a problem with Catherine today,” Mum says out loud. I look at Dad, who just nods.
Dad and Catherine’s dad, Albert, were also friends and worked at the ice cream factory together. But Catherine’s dad got a promotion that both he and Dad were going for, and their friendship fell apart. I don’t know the whole story behind it, only what I’ve eavesdropped on my parent’s conversations at night. But something happened that Dad solved and that Albert took credit for.
“And she’s able to link,” Mum adds, smiling. Dad looks at me with a smile.
- Guess she won’t want to celebrate at the Pack Hall – Dad speaks in my mind.
“Yes, I would!” I smile. Dad touches my shoulder fondly.
“We’ll have to practice your linking and blocking your mind tonight,” Dad adds, looking at me.
Mum and Dad practised linking me, as they called it, and teaching me how to block my thoughts and mind from others. By the night’s end, I’d gotten reasonably good at the skill, and Mum and Dad were impressed. After a horrible day, I actually went to bed feeling happy. I’m getting my wolf! And then soon I’ll meet my mate!
The following morning, I woke up to the same empty house. After dressing in my nice, clean uniform and getting ready for school, I made it to the school grounds with fifteen minutes to spare.
Tuesdays are short days for us students. Classes finish at two-fifteen because the teachers have staff meetings then. My first class was English, then Mathematics. Thankfully, I don’t have P.E. today, so it’ll be easier to keep to myself.
Some days, I don’t get bothered by my bullies, but most days, I do. The days when I’m not bullied are the worst. I spend the day looking over my shoulder, waiting for it to happen. Waiting to be teased, pushed, or have something thrown at me.
Consequently, I walk into the English building with my head down, not engaging with others, trying not to be noticed while keeping my eye out just in case I am. My classmates are waiting in the hallway for the teacher, and I join them, standing next to the wall with a group of others.
A tear threatens to form when the girls I stand beside move away when they notice me. I hate that. It’s like I’m some sort of leper or something. It makes me feel… unworthy. Unwanted.
“Sorry, I’m late!” Mrs Ranfurly greets. She bustles up the stairs in what looks like an old ladies’ nightdress; her plump cheeks are rosy from the rush upstairs to the second floor. We say hello as she approaches, which makes her smile and wish us good morning.
I walk into the class and replace a table in the back middle row to sit down at. Everyone else sits around me, leaving the seat next to me free. I wish someone would choose to sit next to me. Someone to want to sit next to me. I look around the room at my classmates, but they all look happy where they are, chatting with their friends. Quietly, I looked down into my bag and pull out my English workbook and pencil case.
“Okay, today we will look at our book ‘Go Ask Alice.’ I want you to read the following four chapters of her diary, writing notes about Alice’s thoughts about herself and her identity. I sigh. I’ve read this whole book already, and it’s pretty depressing. However, Mrs Ranfurly wants us to do this, so I’ll start.
“Hey, Sera,” Catherine says, poking me in the back. I turn and glare at her.
“What?”
“Is your life like Alice’s? Boring and dumb with nothing to do because nobody likes you?” she asks, grinning.
“You might as well kill yourself if it is,” Inaya, the human girl sitting beside her, adds. I roll my eyes at them, trying to look tough and turn around to my book, trying hard not to feel the pain of their comments.
The door to the classroom suddenly opens, banging against the wall, and a girl walks in. I recognised her as the girl I saw yesterday outside school vaping, who asked me how I was.
“Hello,” Mrs Ranfurly says, stopping what she’s doing and looking at the new girl. I think the whole class is looking at her because we’ve all gone quiet and staring in her direction.
“Sorry! I’m new, and I got lost,” the girl explains, smiling at Mrs Ranfurly.
“That’s okay. You must be Moira Corrin?”
“Yes, ma’am,” the girl, Moira, agrees.
“Take a seat anywhere,” our teacher tells her. I look away then and return to my book. There are plenty of empty spaces… because, yeah, some students decided they’d rather sit alone than have to sit with me. Moira has her pick of where to sit.
“So… what are we doing?” a voice says next to me. I look up and see that Moira has chosen to sit beside me.
“You don’t want to sit here,” I whisper. I can’t tell if she’s a werewolf or not. I haven’t heard anything through the pack gossip channel, so I assume she’s human.
“Why not?” Moira replies, equally quiet but with a smile on her face.
“Oh Moira, this is the book we are reading at the moment,” Mrs Ranfurly says, coming over just then. Moira looks up at Mrs Ranfurly and gives her a beautiful smile. They begin talking about what we’re doing, and I just zone out, not listening to any of it.
“Wow. Go Ask Alice. This is a pretty deep book,” Moira comments once Mrs Ranfurly reads.
“You’ve read this story before?”
“Yeah, when it came out,” Moira replies. I furrow my brows.
“This story came out in the seventies, almost one hundred years ago,” I tell her. Moira looks surprised but then grins before shrugging.
“I thought it came out later, oops. It’s not like it’s real, though. It’s made up,” Moira explains.
“Okay,” I reply, returning to my book. I don’t think much about her comment and continue my work.
I feel a pang of pain on the back of my head and turn around to glower at Catherine.
“What now?” I ask.
“Nothing,” she replies. Shaking my head, I turn around and continue writing about Alice’s state of mind.
Another pang hits the back of my head, and again, I turn to look at Catherine and Inaya. They both have their heads down and are writing in their books.
“Okay, people. Now, I want you to close your books, and we are going to discuss our thoughts regarding Alice’s sense of identity. What things make her happy? How do we know?” our teacher asks, interrupting our work.
People stop what they’re doing, and some raise their hands to contribute to the conversation. I sit there and watch when something hits my head again. I put my hand on the spot where it landed and turned around to glare at Catherine and Inaya.
“Do you have a problem?” I ask.
“Actually, yes. You,” Catherine smiles sweetly. Inaya giggles.
“Everything okay back there?” Mrs Ranfurly asks.
“Yes, Miss! Everything is fine!” Inaya replies with an innocent smile. Mrs Ranfurly nods and returns to the conversation.
“What do you have now?” Moira asks when the bell finally goes.
“Art,” I reply.
“Really? Cool! Me too!” she says as I gather up my books. I just look at her but don’t say anything.
I walk out of the door when Moira catches up with me.
“You don’t mind me walking with you to Art?” Moira asks.
“That’s fine,” I shrug. I can’t get close to her. Everyone I’ve become friends with at high school leaves me and joins the I Hate Sera Club. Moira will be just like them.
~ Edited with Grammarly
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