Diversion To Urasha -
Chapter 12
“Hate,” Crystos whispered, still tensed as he eyed Crystaline. “It is such a strong word, isn’t it? Many people use the word carelessly. They use it to describe things they do not hate, but instead, they merely dislike. I hate Cryston, I hate him with every single atom in my body. I mean look at her, look at Crystaline. See how she was helping that chugga, tending to its injuries with such a gentleness. You know, so many people look at my sister, and they dislike her, they judge her. They think she’s cold, emotionless, cruel. If they could see her caring for that chugga, maybe then they would not be so quick to judge, maybe then, they would see her for the pure, kind princess she truly is.”
James gazed towards Crystaline. She was still sat by Chugga-Chugga, stroking the baby blue animal as it slept. James felt a lump forming in his throat.
“My father is destroying her,” Crystos continued. “Encasing that pure, caring heart of hers into a shell. A shell of pain, sorrow, and hate. That shell continues to grow stronger and stronger every day, hiding that compassionate heart of hers. Soon I fear that her heart will be completely lost, trapped in a never-ending darkness.”
James could feel that lump in his throat continuing to grow, wreaking havoc against his vocal cords. “I don’t get it, what does he do? I mean Crystaline and her father, they seem close? Or they appear to get along at least?”
Crystos scoffed bitterly. “They get along, yes. Crystaline would never ever defy her father...no matter what he makes her do.”
“And what does he make her do?” James’ voice was a strained whisper, his eyes watching as Crystos’ fists clenched together into a tight ball.
“He makes her...” Crystos’ voice was hoarse, displaying how broken he was. “He makes her… he forces her to get involved in his affairs. A king needs popularity. He’s powerful, yes, but he needs people to like him. Cryston is a corrupt man, using bribery to bring on side some of the most influential men on Urasha. His weapon? Crystaline.”
James gulped. He was beginning to feel sick. Could Crystos be talking about what he saw the other night? Crystaline? With that old man? Surely not? Surely her father wouldn’t stoop to such levels? “A weapon? I er, what do you mean exactly?”
Crystos continued to stare at Crystaline, blinking rapidly to restrain his tears. “He sends her to...he arranges for her to...he forces her to please those vile evil men. Crystaline’s an attractive woman, adored by many men, and Cryston uses that to his advantage.”
James’ head was spinning, making him nauseous. This was wrong! This was disgusting! Cryston, how could a man, a father force his own daughter into that? “He makes her have sex with those men? Those pigs? How? How can anyone inflict that on their own child? And Crystaline, why does she do it? She seems so strong, so audacious, so able to stand up for herself. Why?”
“Through love!” Crystos was barely able to fight away his tears, “Crystaline adores her father. She’s always had so much love to give. She was doted to her mother, our mother. Then Crystie died, and it damaged all our souls. My father transformed, his blood being replaced by a potent black venom of hatred. He sunk his fangs into Crystaline, injecting her with his poison, dragging her down into oblivion with him, all because she had a gaping void in her heart. Crystaline dealt with the emptiness by filling her heart with yet more love for her father. She doesn’t like what he makes her do. She doesn’t want to comply to such ghastly arrangements, but she does. Crystaline would never dare defy her father. She doesn’t care that she suffers. Crystaline just wants to make sure that Cryston suffers as little as possible, so she acquiesces, giving herself to these chauvinistic fools. If it were up to me, I would destroy my father, ridding this entire Universe of him.”
“Then why, why don’t you?”
“Can you imagine what it would do to Crystaline to have her father taken away from her? To have him killed? She would not understand. She would not be able to cope. She would never ever recover from such an ordeal. As her brother, someone who should be protecting her, I feel...I feel like I’ve failed her.”
“No,” James disagreed, leaning towards Crystos. “You’ve not failed her. I mean, you’re here, looking out for her. You’re faced with an impossible decision: You either kill Cryston and completely obliterate Crystaline’s heart, or you allow him to live, salvaging what’s left of your sister. She’s good, Crystos, I can see that.”
Crystos’ expression eased, his emotions seemingly placated by James’ words of comfort. “I had...I had noticed that you talk to my sister? You make the effort to speak to her?”
“Yeah,” James nodded, allowing a reassuring smile to take over his desolate expression. “I think Crystaline’s a woman worth getting to know. She has a good heart, and if I can see that, then that warm heart of hers is still beating strong.”
Crystos looked shyly to the ground, his lips curling into a bashful smile. “Thank you, James.”
“What for?”
“For listening, for understanding, for not judging my sister like so many others. I never realised that talking...” Crystos’ words halted, his mind trailing off into uncertainty.
“That talking helps? That getting feelings, emotions, problems out into the open helps?”
Crystos nodded tentatively.
“It’s helped me all these years. I don’t where, or who I’d be if it wasn’t for Lottie. She’s always been there to listen, and I her. That’s what friendship is.” James proffered out his hand to Crystos. “You’re an admirable man, Crystos, I’d like to offer you my friendship, my ear, my help. I’ll do the same for Crystaline when I think she’s willing to accept my offer. You don’t have to bottle up your thoughts, buddy, not now, not ever.”
Crystos’ golden irises assessed James’ gentle indulgent expression for a moment. Then he grabbed James’ hand, shaking it.
James had gained a new friend.
After his harrowing conversation with Crystos, the last thing James felt like doing was sleeping, despite the fact that Crystos had retreated away to his very own furleave. James’ head was spinning, his insides reeling. There was still plenty of fruit and bruc left next to the fire, but James felt sick, nauseated by what he’d been told.
Crystaline was still with Chugga-Chugga. Whether or not the chugga was still sleeping, James did not know. The truth was, James could barely even look at Crystaline right now. His insides would roil whenever he even thought of her. How could a father subject his daughter to that? It was wrong, wrong on every single level.
Feeling pained and frustrated, James ran his fingers through his golden hair, staring at the purple flame in front of him. There was a chill to the air tonight, and even this flame’s gentle little licks of heat weren’t enough to keep the chill at bay.
As he noticed Crystaline’s shadowy silhouette crossing his field of vision, James felt his heart do a backflip in his chest. Tentatively, he raised his head, eyeing Crystaline as she sat down opposite him, taking a piece of bruc in her dainty little hands. Those hands, so deft, so fragile. Her body was so beautiful, so supreme. You wouldn’t know it if you looked at her body. Crystaline’s body was sublime, healthy, showing no signs of damage or abuse. James eyed Crystaline’s face surreptitiously. Her face was perfect, the exact definition of beauty. Yet those eyes, although exquisite with their regality, those eyes would tell quite an opposing story. James got it now. He understood why Crystaline was so cold, so aloof. He understood why Crystaline would just look so blank, so hollow, her face and her body completely taut with impassiveness. Those eyes, on the other hand, they would reveal a different story. It was as if Crystaline were disconnected away from her divine body, trapped in some harsh prison elsewhere. A world where nothing but pain, darkness and anguish existed. James couldn’t avoid Crystaline now. He wanted to help her. “How’s Chugga-Chugga?” he just about managed.
Crystaline stopped chewing her food, her forlorn expression back in its full element. “He’s sleeping.”
Feeling a little uncomfortable quiver reverberating through his body, James broke eye contact with Crystaline, focusing intently on the purple flame in front of him. He was surprised to hear Crystaline’s voice sounding out again.
“Do you miss your friends?” she said.
James looked back up at Crystaline. “Yeah, yeah I do. I miss Lottie a heck of a lot.”
“Lottie? The young woman?”
“Yeah, that’s her. Long wavy hair, glasses, that’s Lottie.”
“Are the two of you...together?”
James shook his head, feeling relieved by his ability to now feel amusement. “No, we’re not together. Not if you mean like that? Lottie’s my best friend, we’ve been best friends ever since we were children.”
Crystaline’s eyebrows crinkled with disinterest, creating an abrupt pause in the conversation. James felt his heart rate increasing, growing more and more emboldened. Maybe Crystaline needed to understand the importance of friendship, of getting troubles out in the open?
“I remember that day, you know. That day when Lottie first joined my school. I was a rebel back then, derailed by life itself.” James felt that lump beginning to work its way back up his throat. He gave a little grunt, endeavouring to clear that wretched little lump away. “My er, my father died when I was just a boy.”
As soon as James mentioned his father’s death, Crystaline’s eyes had shot down to the ground, her breathing rapidly speeding up.
James continued, pretending not to be aware of Crystaline’s growing discomfort. He wanted her to hear this. “Lottie’s parents died, too. She lost both of them in a car accident. She’s not from my country, but she had relatives who lived in my town, so she went to stay with them, joining my school.”
“At first, I had no idea, you know. I was just caught up in my own bubble of terror, not caring about the new girl who’d joined my class. That was until I heard that conversation, one between her and a teacher. The teacher was telling Lottie that it would all be okay. That her door would always be open, should Lottie ever need to discuss her parent’s death. From that moment Lottie had me - hook, line and sinker. I knew then that I’d do anything to protect this girl, to rid her of her pain, a pain which I was suffering through, too.” James grinned a boyish grin. “I guess you could say that I was pretty lucky that Lottie didn’t think I was a total twat. She wanted my friendship too, and so, we grew up together, helping each other through the trials of life.”
“I still remember that feeling, the one when I first decided to be friends with Lottie. I remember that overwhelming impulse to protect her. I’ve tried with all my might to look after Lottie all these years, but you know what I’ve actually realised? Lottie was the one who’s protected me all these years. If it wasn’t for her, having her to talk to, I don’t know where I’d be, or who I’d be. Do you have anyone, Crystaline? You know, someone to talk to?”
Crystaline’s breath hitched, and her eyes sharpened as they tore into James’. “What do you mean?” she whispered, her face impassive, but her eyes scrutinising every inch of James. “What makes you think that I need someone to talk to?”
“Everyone needs someone,” James whispered.
Crystaline slowly shook her head sideways, a grim smile unfurling from her lips. Her golden eyes were like daggers, ones which held unshed tears. “Well I don’t need anyone. You see, James, life is a war, a series of many battles which you just have to get through because of your pathetic primal instincts to survive. You can make allies, certainly. You can hold them in your heart, but really, your allies become your worst enemies, betraying you, destroying you.”
James shook his head, perplexed. “How? Not everyone is deceitful, Crystaline.”
“Aren’t they? Think about it. The ones you love are all lying there in your heart, completely dormant for now. They may even provide you with temporary strength. That won’t last forever though, mark my words. Each and every one of those people will explode inside your heart, ripping you to shreds, obliterating every atom that makes you the person you are. You’ve just got to think back to how you felt when your father left you. Everyone you let in and outlive will end up doing the exact same thing to you. Life is a war, James, ironically a war between you and life itself.”
James was lost for words. He could only watch on, mouth gaped wide open as Crystaline made an abrupt beeline for her furleave. James still did not feel like sleeping, but he had no choice. What good would it do to just sit out here awake? Brooding over gloomy thoughts? James fixed up his furleave, preparing himself for a long sleepless night.
When he awoke, James could feel that wretched little itching all over his naked arms. His mouth felt dry and foul tasting. Realising that he had furleave in his mouth, James’ senses returned to him. James sat upright, startled by the noises of people all around him. Was everyone else up already? Had he been the last one to awaken? James was surprised that he’d even managed any sleep, especially after a night like last night.
As James’ eyes flitted over his companions, they eventually paused on Crystaline. She was with the chugga, beaming at the creature with such a tenderness. James was glad that the little creature was okay. The thing looked bright, chirpy and fully recovered this morning. The chugga now wore what appeared to be a makeshift necklace made from purple furleaves. It made Chugga-Chugga look cute, but slightly girly too.
As James continued to watch Crystaline, he was reminded of what Crystos had told him last night, and Crystaline’s sullen words. Life could indeed be a struggle, that was just part of the ride. But a war? Paralleling life directly with a war, that was a bit extreme, wasn’t it? Or was it? James thought again of what Crystos had told him, of Crystaline’s suffering all these years. Her heart was lonely, lost in a storm of unrelenting darkness. Yet watching her with Chugga-Chugga, it was like Crystaline’s heart had found something. A beacon of light? Of solace?
As he raised away from his furleave, James couldn’t prevent his lips from smiling. It was good to see Crystaline like this, smiling, genuinely happy. “Chugga-Chugga looks a lot better,” he beamed.
Crystaline’s face hardened. “Yes, he’s healed nicely. He’s still sticking with us though.”
“I never thought he wouldn’t.” James peered down at the indulgent, soppy black eyes of Chugga-Chugga, gently stroking him. The chugga purred, enjoying James’ touch. When he looked back up at Crystaline, her eyes were cold, assessing. “Everyone else had their wash?” James asked, trying to placate her. His actions were fruitless, gaining only a disdainful nod from Crystaline. “I er, is it okay if I take a quick wash in the river as well?”
Crystaline frowned, “you’ve held us up enough already.”
Just as James’ mouth was about to speak, he heard Crystos walking up behind him.
“Morning, James.” Crystos’ greeting was warm, friendly, riling Crystaline even further. “If James needs a wash, let him wash, Crystaline. It’s not like we need to be back by a certain time, is it?”
Crystaline’s eyebrows furrowed, her eyes tearing into her brother’s.
James took this as his cue to head for the river, leaving brother and sister eye to eye.
Once James had finished washing himself in the river, the group had been quick to resume travel.
Now that he was used to the awkward terrain of the forest, James felt his feet deftly skipping across the ground. Despite his body’s rapid ability to be able to adapt to the Urashan forest, James paid little attention to his dexterous movements. Instead he focused all of his attentions and thoughts on the forest all around him, and Crystaline, who was walking in front of him.
As usual, Crystaline was leading the group, remaining mostly silent as she worked her way through the forest, sticking once again to the river which ran through the entire scene.
As James continued to travel, he couldn’t help but notice how much lighter this forest was beginning to look. As he peered up towards the patches of Urashan sky, he would occasionally catch the odd glimpse of the Urashan sun, just about managing to creep its way through the trees. The sun was no brighter today than it had been yesterday. So why was the forest brightening? Just as James pondered over this thought, he heard a noise, a howl coming from the trees above him. “What’s that?” he said, his words spoken in slow motion.
Crystaline stilled, scanning the trees up above her. “Moonkas. We need to keep moving.”
“I thought moonkas weren’t dangerous?” Phil protested.
“They’re not,” Crystaline answered back, her pace of movement quickening. “They’re boisterous though and have been known to cause trouble. I don’t know about you, Phil, but I don’t want to be in the firing line of a moonka.”
Just as James felt his own legs quickening, he caught a glimpse of white in one of the nearby trees. Then, without warning, the puffy white creature jumped onto the next tree, alerting James’ attentions to three more moonkas. The animals were noisy, clearly communicating with one another. It was obvious that the creatures knew that their habitat was being trespassed upon. The noises they made reminded James of hyenas. The moonkas sounded like they were chuckling, concocting some mischievous little plan to cause trouble. James could sense that the moonkas were up to no good, and as if confirming this, James saw something being hurtled his way. Whatever it was had thankfully missed James, only to hit Zach straight on the stomach instead. Winded by the blow, Zach fell to the ground, clutching his stomach.
“Zach, are you alright?” Phil helped his comrade back onto his feet, furrowing his brows at the bright red stain on Zach’s t-shirt.
“I’m fine, man, I’m fine. Those creatures sure have an arm on them though.”
“What hit you?”
Ignoring the cackles of Morcees and Borcees, Zach studied the mushy piece of red goo on the floor beside him. “Man, I don’t know. I think that’s fruit?”
“That was all,” Crystaline confirmed. “We really need to make a move on.” Her deft feet changed direction, taking a quick escape route into a patch of overly dense trees. James hated these dense areas. They were so tight, so claustrophobic.
James was relieved when he stepped free from the clingy trees, into sparser forest once again. Thankfully, James could no longer see or hear the moonkas. Crystaline must have managed to lose the troublesome creatures.
“Stupid animals!” Phil grunted. “I mean seriously, how much more of this do we have to take? We’re surrounded by who knows what, with that thing following us around.”
Feeling suddenly protective of Chugga-Chugga, James stopped walking, squaring up to his captain instead. “Don’t be such a bully. What has Chugga-Chugga ever done to harm us?”
“Well, he nearly got us killed by those wild dogs, for one thing. Then those moonkas, maybe that animal even attracted those.”
James shook his head. He could feel nothing but resentment. “You’re unbelievable, you know that? I didn’t know what it was going to be like coming out here with you, I’ve gotta admit. I even thought that maybe, just maybe I’d see a different side to you, you know, one that I could actually put up with. But all I’ve seen is what I thought I would: a selfish man who likes to be in control. A man who cares about no one.”
“I care about no one? James, I care more than you’ll ever know. I love your mother. I care about her, I care about you.”
James scoffed, ignoring Zach’s attempts to placate the situation. “Oh please, spare me the bullshit. Tell me this, did you care about my father? You know, your best friend? The husband of your girlfriend? My father?”
Phil’s face had paled. He looked lost for words.
James’ continued with his verbal onslaught. “I mean really, it’s sick when you think about it. My dad...” James’ eyes began to well up. “My dad was your friend. He trusted you, and you backstabbed him with the ultimate betrayal.”
Phil looked suddenly angry. “I betrayed your father? I betrayed my best friend? The man who was like a brother to me? Then tell me, James, if I betrayed Jonathan, then what does that make your mother? She’s no less of a traitor than I am.”
James felt every single muscle in his body tensing, summoning every single ounce of strength into one limb. Like a catapult, James’ fist flung straight into his captain’s face, sending the man falling back into a shocked Zach’s arms.
James turned, trudging his way through the forest in a desperate attempt to flee from Phil.
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