Extracts from The Diaries of 'Professor' Cornelius Crane
April 5th, 1969

I was passingthe pawn shop today and my eye again caught the music box in the window. I wentinside to take a closer look.

It was marked$50.

No wonderHannah had said it would take some time to save up the money to buy it.

I had turnedto the Jimmy Durante clone behind the counter and blurted, “Fifty dollars? Forthis? Don’t you think that’s a bit steep?”

“Take it orleave it, sonny.” His nose was large, red and seemed to be polished. He tappedhis finger against the side of it and quipped, “It’s no skin off my nose.”

I decided totake a gander around the shop. Maybe there were some items of value, that werepriced cheaply, but of which he was not aware. Something only a time travelerwould know about. But after seeing the ridiculous price of the music box, Iseriously doubted that there would be any stray bargains at all lying about.

There was abox of old spectacles lying between a stack of large, dusty, decorative,Delftware plates and a heap of even dustier National Geographics.

I suddenlyhad an idea. It wasn’t a great scheme, but at least it was something.

On the wall,behind the box was a large old picture frame with an image depicting a bunch ofdogs playing poker on train. I used the reflection in the glass to replace theperfect pair. The lenses were slightly thick and made my eyes appear larger.

“Tendollars?” I complained loudly. “That’s a rip-off! Fu…flipping daylightrobbery.”

“Take ‘em orleave ‘em, sonny.” He tapped his finger against the side of his nose.

With theprices he charged, I got the impression that his enormous schnoz had becomethat way from constantly having to do that same action all day long with everysingle customer.

I removed a$10 bill from the secret hiding place in my shoe. I unfurled it and handed itto him.

He jabbed atthe large cash register. A small token marked 10.00 popped up in the glassedportion at the top. After another jab, the bottom slid open with a ding.

I was at thedoor when he called after me, “What do you need ‘em for?”

“Our school’sdoing a pageant about famous past American presidents!”

“Yeah? Whichone are you?”

“See if youcan guess,” I said putting them on and assuming a haughty appearance.

“Harry S.Truman?”

“Right!” Isaid pointing a finger at him.

“See, worthevery dollar!”

“Harry S.Truman, 33rd President. Do you know what the S stands for?”

He took ashot. “Stephen?” I shook my head. “Samuel?”

“Nah! The Sstands for S.”

“His middlename was S?”

“Yeah, ain’tthat crazy? His mother and father both had middle names for him that startedwith S, and when they couldn’t agree on which one to use they just decided toleave it as S.”

“That iscrazy.”

“Yeah!”

“Well, youtaught this old codger something new. Actually you look like another Harry.”

“Yeah?”

“HaroldLloyd.”

We bothlaughed. “That’s great, because I always thought they kinda looked verysimilar.” We laughed even louder.

“See! You gottwo famous people for the price of one set of spectacles. I told you they wereworth every dollar!”

“That remains to be seen,” I said loudlywalking out the door. Then I softly repeated to myself, “That remains to beseen.”