Extracts from The Diaries of 'Professor' Cornelius Crane
May 6th, 1996

I was passing Steve’s office today, and on glancing in, my eyes met avision of great beauty and dread.

Filling the chair, with her enormous frame, on the opposite side of hisdesk, was Nicolette ‘Abandon all hope ye who enter here’ Kurtzman – Nikki!!!

I think my heart had skipped a beat.

Although her wild hair was held in check by an Alice band, I hadrecognized her immediately by her large frame and full, pink, pouting lips.

I had directly backtracked in order to prove to myself that I had indeedglimpsed correctly (Yet, I prayed earnestly that I had been mistaken).

This time I stopped in the doorway for a better look.

She was wearing a white, form-fitting polo-neck top that shaped itselfadmirably along the contours of her upper body. Below was a gray, tight-fittingskirt that should have reached past her knees, but had somehow managed to replaceits way up, onto her strong thighs. She constantly made half-hearted attemptsto correct the presumptuous garment. And each time she did, Steve’s eyes wereunable to avoid the naked, shapely, tanned legs that emerged from beneath hercreeping clothing.

I was reminded of Sharon Stone’s character in that Basic Instinct movie –any moment now she might spread those magnificent legs to reveal yet another ofher finest assets.

Amazingly, Steve was the first to spot me in the doorway. He beckoned meinside and stood up.

“Come in!” He waved a hand at Nikki. “Cornelius, I’d like you to meetNicolette Kurtzman.”

She never waited for further introductions. She stood up, held out herhand and declared, “It’s a pleasure and an honor to finally meet you in person,Mr. Crane. I’ve been keeping track of all your…of Global’s excellent track record.Most impressive!”

I managed a feeble, “Oh?”

Steve informed me far too excitedly, “Miss Kurtzman is here for a jobinterview. She’s very interested in the position needed for that specialproject.”

I managed to repeat an even weaker, “Oh?”

“That’s right, Miss Kurtzman has a…”

She interrupted. “Nikki! Please, call me Nikki! Everyone else does!”

“Nikki has a similar position over at Futronics.”

“Oh, so you already know each other, then?”

“Yes! Well, actually, no. I’d seen her around a couple of times. Sheworked…works under Frank Myer in a different section.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty darn sure she works under Frank.”

“What’s that mean?” she asked frowning.

I ignored her query and asked, “So when did you two first meet?”

“Today! Today is the first time we’ve actually spoken. And may I say,‘What a charming, intelligent young lady.’ I’m sorry I never got to know herearlier at Futronics.”

Nikki pretended to be embarrassed at the flattering remark. “Why, thankyou Mr. Ferran.”

I regained my composure and asked, “Are you unhappy at Futronics? Why thedecision to move?”

“The usual ones. Better pay. Better working conditions. Betteropportunity for advancement.”

“Well, that last one certainly fits the bill!”

“Exactly! I told you I was impressed with Global’s record.”

“Well, I guess an interview works both ways. We both gotta be sure thatwhat we have to offer each other is worth the…risk.”

“Exactly! I wouldn’t want to risk making the change if I didn’t think itwas totally to my benefit as well.”

“Of course! And what makes you think you could be a benefit to us?”

“I’m one of the best in my field.”

“I admire your honesty and…modesty.”

“Do you know me?”

“What?”

“I mean, are you familiar with my work or…me or…” She paused frowning.“It’s just that you keep speaking as though you already know me from somewhereelse?”

“It’s just my way of grilling all the possible applicants.”

Steve unfortunately came to her rescue. “She really is one of the best inher field. I’m equally impressed with her track record.”

“Sure, Steve, but let’s look at all the options before you make anydecisions.” There was a small pack of folders on his desk. I flipped throughthem. “Are these the other applicants?”

There was irritation in his voice as he suddenly asked in a hushed tone,“Can we talk outside for a minute?” Then louder to Nikki, “Please, sit down.I’ll be with you shortly.”

He closed his office door from the outside and said, “This should havebeen shut in the first place!” After checking to see that the passageway wasclear, he asked sternly, “What was that?”

“What?” I frowned.

“I don’t think that was very professional - talking like that in front ofher?”

“Oh, really? And you think it’s professional to boost her, and her hopes,before you’ve even made any final decision? You’re still young Steve. You gottatoughen up some. Get used to the idea that this is a don’t call us, we’ll callyou world, okay? People win – people lose! Get used to it!”

“Right! And the winners get to rub the losers’ noses in it?”

“I never said that!”

“Look, I know what this is all about. I know where you’re coming from!”

“You do?” I asked slightly concerned.

“Yeah, of course!” He made another inspection of the passageway beforedeclaring, “You’re just being prejudice! She might look like a dumb, blondebimbo to you, but she’s got a fine academic record as long as my arm.”

“Are you sure you don’t mean as long as your dick?”

“What the hell’s that supposed to mean?”

“You know exactly what it means!”

“You think I want to hire her for her looks?”

“Nah, it’s because she’s charming and intelligent. I think thatlittle…large witch has charmed the wool over your eyes?”

“Are you suggesting that I can’t do my job properly?”

“No, I’m just…”

“No, I think you are? And if that is the case, then maybe you should alsostart looking for another Chief Engineer of Technology as well?”

“Would you put your attitude and your dick back where they belong? AllI’m saying…all I said was, ‘You need to look at all the options before makingyour final choice.’ Where’s the harm in that? It was obvious that you…”

“And it was obvious that you weren’t very decent in there. You don’t saystuff like that in front of an applicant. Even if you are the goddamned CEO ofa multibillion dollar company, it doesn’t give you the right to hurt anybody’sfeelings.”

“You’re right!”

“What?” he asked puzzled, having the brisk wind suddenly removed from hisangrily flapping sails.

“I said, ‘You’re right! I’m sorry! It was wrong of me. You’ve helped meto see my…mistake. Please…forgive me?”

“You’re forgiven, but…” He still continued to glare. This time searchingmy face for a hint of any insincerity that I might be trying to conceal.

“But?”

“I’m in charge of this project. The final decision is mine.”

“I understand.”

“If it’ll make you happy, I’ll look at the other applicants as well?”

“Very happy.”

“Fine! But, if I choose Nikki…Miss Kurtzman, the subject is closed –understand?”

“Clearly!”

“Good! Now if you’ll excuse me, I have an interview to finish?”

“Don’t let me keep you.”

“I’ll let you know my decision by the end of the week.”

This time he closed the door after entering his office again.

I managed to get a good distance from his office before releasing myfrustration.

The unfortunate employees, that chanced to be in my vocal range, had madehaste to remove themselves from my charming and intelligent presence.

For all intents and purposes, she is the best person for the job. Atleast the job that Steve naively believes she’s applying for!

So, I have absolutely no doubt that he will make the finest wrongdecision of his whole career and life.

Sometimes, having foreknowledge is not quite as gratifying as one mayexpect.

Sometimes, it’s like knowing for certain that there’s a big, scarymonster in the cupboard and then, foolishly, still opening it!

Time travel can be confusingly…ambiguous!!!