Foul Ball
Chapter 40: Macey

"Hey, Macey," Jayce said on the other end of the phone. Hearing his voice sent a shiver down my spine, as it had every time the last three days. A shiver of longing. Of sadness. Of devastation. Being without him by my side had been the most difficult thing I'd experienced in my short years on earth, but I knew dragging him through this hell with me would be unfair to him. "I hope you're okay," Jayce continued on the message. "I've been really worried about you, and I just want to know that you're doing alright. I'm here for you, okay? As a boyfriend, as a friend, as an annoying ex..." I chuckled at that. "I'm here for you. So please. Please, just call me back or even text me and let me know you're okay. I'll try you again soon."

I clicked the end button on my phone and set it aside, resting my head back against the mini pillow the clinic had provided me with as I laid back on the bed, trying to ignore the slight stinging in my arm as the chemo drugs pumped my body full. I'd come in yesterday morning for the bone marrow test to see if we could replace out how progressed it was, and it turns out there wasn't even time to wait a week to start chemo. So here I was, at the hospital in a small little patient bed with a needle in my arm. Alone.

That was my fault, of course, as I still hadn't told anyone about the diagnosis. Not Hansen, not my parents. It was all too real now, but I was still trying to wrap my head around it.

"How are you doing, Macey?" Melissa asked, stepping into the room to check my bag. It was dark outside. I'd been here for almost an hour.

"Doing awesome," I said with a weak smile. "I imagine it will be even more awesome when I start vomiting uncontrollably. Isn't that a side effect?"

"For some, yes," Melissa said, helping me take a drink of water. She smiled. "Maybe you'll be one of the lucky ones."

"Lucky," I said. "Yeah."

"I didn't mean it like that, Macey."

"It's okay." I rested my hand on top of hers and smiled. "I know. Thank you for being here with me. And thank you for not telling Jayce."

Melissa nodded and pursed her lips, and for a long moment she looked like she wanted to say something.

"What is it?" I asked after the silence drew on for far too long. Melissa sighed and pulled up a chair to sit down next to the bed. She took my hands and squeezed them.

"I don't think Jayce is doing very well," she said softly. "He called me the night you ended it and he didn't sound good. He asks me every day if I have seen you around the hospital, even just for work." "What do you tell him?"

"No, of course."

"Thank you." I closed my eyes as the last of my energy began to drain from my soul, but I could tell that Melissa wasn't finished.

"Have you considered telling him?" she asked, and I shook my head.

"I can't, Melissa. I won't be the girl that screws it all up for him."

"Why on earth would you ever think that was the case?" she asked. "You're one of the best things to ever happen to Jayce, and I stand behind that."

Forcing a weak smile for her, I squeezed her hand back, too tired to think of Jayce and what I'd done to him. He deserved more than this. He deserved more than me.

"What about your parents?" Melissa asked. "You told me you'd tell them. Have you?" "No."

"Macey..."

I looked at the clock on my phone. It was almost nine, and even with the time change, I knew my mother would still be awake. "I'll call them now," I said, my voice catching in my throat. Melissa was right. It was time. She nodded and left, giving my hand one last squeeze as I dialed my parent's number and put the phone to my ear.