Her Volkovs #Book 4
Chapter 44

Belle's POV

Nikolai's arm held me tight in place as he guides my chin to look him in the eyes. He knows that this is my weakness. He very well knows that he is my weakness.

"Baby, please." He begged.

I tried to look down but he held my chin once again. Truth is, I do not want to continue looking at him because I can actually see and feel his pain. The kind of pain that the eyes can never hide. This man in front of me is not the Nikolai that I have always known. This is not the Volkov who always has everything under control.

"You promised you'd grow old with me. You said the three of us, forever and ever. Why are you giving up on us?"

It's as if he is truly bewildered as to why I am giving up on our relationship. It's like he doesn't understand how he and his brother broke my heart by using me as someone akin to their dead lover. "What am I going to be fighting for then Nikolai? Our relationship was a lie. There is no reason for us to continue. There is no forever and ever. You do not love me. Your brother did not love me." "You don't get to tell me that I do not love you. I'm the only one who gets to decide that. Believe me, you are wrong! You are the only one that I'm in love with. Whatever it is that you are thinking is wrong! Baby, did you open the letter I sent you? Did you read what's in it?"

This time, I forced myself to look away. I don't see how the letter will change the fact that they see Yelena in me. The fact that they forgot my birthday because of her.

"Ara, do you want to go?" Said Devon who just arrived in the lounge. He was the one sent by my father to arrange our return to the Palawian Embassy.

Nikolai darted a look at my cousin but Devon could not care less. He doesn't care that we are practically surrounded by Nikolai's men and that he is going against the Mafia Boss himself.

"My wife and I are talking." Said Nikolai as he holds my wrist firmly after he caught me attempting to pull away from him.

My cousin was about to step forward to take me but then Boris and Dimitri were already by his side. Before anything could happen I took the attention of the Mafia Boss. "What do you want Nikolai?"

"I want you to come home with me. Alexei is in the mansion. He's still unconscious but we both know whose face he wants to see when he wakes up."

"Ara." Said my cousin with a hint of warning in his voice.

"I will come with you to the mansion." I said, ignoring Devon. Nikolai then signals his men to prepare to leave but I wasn't finished yet.

"I will come with you to the mansion for one night, just so I can see Alexei but you will stay away from me."

"Okay." He was quick to answer.

"And you will sign the divorce papers. You will not contest every single provision and I get full custody of the children. You will have visiting rights anytime you want."

Nikolai's adam's apple moved as if what I just said was too much for him to take. He wasn't able to say a word for a good ten seconds. He just looks at me, eyes glistening.

I know that I am in no position to negotiate with him at this very moment because if he wishes, he can just have me and my whole family dragged back to the mansion. Still, I am taking my chance. "I will sign- the divorce- in one condition."

I felt like my heart skipped a beat the moment I heard his response. I know that this was against his will and yet he was able to muster the words. Nikolai Vyacheslav Volkov just agreed to divorce. "What condition?" I asked before he could even change his mind.

"You will read the letter I sent you and the one attached to it."

The letter must be that important to him that he is willing to give up and sign the divorce paper in exchange for it to be read. "How can I be sure if you will keep your part of this deal Nikolai?"

"I am a man of my word Arabella. I do as I say. And you know that."

I know that I have struck a nerve when it came out as that I don't trust him. Truth is, I know him as a man who keeps his word. He does exactly as he says.

My father and Nikolai talked for a while before Papa and Mama were escorted back to the embassy. My father was not persuaded to stay temporarily in the mansion and so tonight they will be staying at the embassy. Amy and Devon will come with me to the mansion until our meeting with the lawyers tomorrow to finalize our divorce. I made sure everything is planned and discussed with Nikolai before I even agreed to come to the mansion with him. My only concern now is surviving the night with Alexei in dire condition and Nikolai just around.

The Mansion

Belle's POV

It's almost midnight and so far Nikolai kept his word that he will stay away from me. I haven't seen him since we arrived in the mansion. I'm in our room and everything is exactly where it was before I left. Alexei is stable but he needs to wake up the soonest possible time. The longer he's unconscious, the smaller the chance that he will be better.

I try not to think of what will happen when I leave after tomorrow given that this is Alexei's condition. Part of me hates myself for thinking about my freedom knowing fully well that when I leave, Alexei's condition is still unclear. I want to take care of him but I don't know how to, if the only thing I want is to leave them.

I sat back and rested on the comfortable chair right next to Alexei's bed. I cradled my very pregnant belly as the little Volkovs are making it harder and harder for their mother to function normally each day. The doctor's appointment to know the gender of the twins is overdue. I'm thinking I should do it whilst in New York because I want to share that very special moment with both Nikolai and Alexei. As much as I want to divorce them, when it comes to the twins, they will have their fair share of happiness.

I left my phone in my bag somewhere and so I used Alexei's that is within my reach. His wallpaper is still the same picture he took back in the brownstone house, the one with the flower headpiece. I can still remember the exact cheeky smile on his face when he called me mother earth asking about the trees in the forest.

Scandalous is the mildest word to describe the contents of this man's gallery and storage. My goodness, what if someone gets a hold of his phone?

I dialed Nikolai and after two rings he answered.

"Baby."

"Hmm. How did you know it was me Nikolai?"

"My brother is passed out. You are with him. Takes no genius to deduce really." He said with the typical Volkov arrogance.

"What am I doing now?" I asked as I test my theory that he might be watching me from somewhere. I removed my bra and adjust my top to show my plunging breasts.

"Oh fuck." He mumbles. "I mean, you're calling me right now on the phone. You are asking some weird questions Arabella." He said as he clears his throat.

Hmm. Suspicious.

"How about now?" This time I reached for Alexei's hand to hold my left boob.

I heard him whisper in Russian. "What was that Nikolai?" I asked.

"Nothing baby. Again, you are asking some weird questions."

"Hmm. Okay. So about the twins." I said adjusting my top and going back to my seat.

"What about the twins?"

"Would you like to hear their heartbeats and replace out their gender? You know, before- before we divorce?" I covered my mouth to suppress myself from completely breaking down. I feel bad for the twins. I feel bad that we are giving up on them. And I hate myself for being in this situation.

There's nothing but silence on the other side of the line. I wiped the tears that are flowing down my face and did not push the suggestion further. Maybe he is not ready to do it so I just let it go.

Nikolai downs his liquor and closes his laptop after seeing Belle in the security camera doze off. He leaves the study and went straight to the master bedroom. He removes the phone from Belle's hand and brushes off the hair from her face. He then checks on his brother and whispered to his ear, "You fucking lucky bastard."

He puts the warm blanket in place to make sure his brother is good for the night. He then carries Belle in his arms gently, taking his precious time to place her in bed. In Nikolai's mind, he does not want this night to end. He doesn't want tomorrow to come.

He covers her with their duvet resisting the unbearable urge to touch her and feel her warmth against his skin. She's right here beside him and yet she's so far away.

Nikolai can literally feel his heart hurt as he recalls how Belle is so determined to break off their marriage. How she has completely given up on him.

They have fallen apart, beyond repair. The letter is the only thing left for him to save their relationship, and even with that, he's not hopeful he can fix her heart to forgive him.

Nikolai rested his back on the headboard of the bed, staring blankly in the dead silence of the night. He looks at the table right next to him and contemplated for a while before finally giving in. He took a few

pills from the compartment and downed it with vodka. Since Belle left them, the pills became Nikolai's solace. The numbness he feels as the effect hits his system became his temporary cure.

Scene: Yuri, Dimitri, Boris and Andrey outside of the Master Bedroom, hands in their pockets and looking at the huge door in front of them. Dimitri: Why is it so quiet?

Andrey: It's not going to happen.

Boris: -

Yuri: (Clenches his jaw, looking at the door intently) (Turns his back and leaves impatiently.)

Andrey: (Follows his brother) Hey, what's going on?

Yuri: It's over.

Dimitri: What do you mean it's over? They're there. They are going to patch things up and everything is going to be alright tomorrow. Yuri: It's the Boss. The Boss has given up.

Belle's POV

When I woke up the next day, everything looks in place and no Nikolai Vyacheslav Volkov was in sight. It was silent in the room aside from the slight beeping of some of Alexei's apparatus. Dimitri said that his Boss left early for a meeting. I did not ask further as it's none of my business anymore. What matters is he has agreed to sign the divorce papers later.

Before anything else, I needed to arrange Alexei's care before I leave. Amy was able to recommend four private male nurses who will work in shifts to tend to him aside from the ones sent regularly by the hospital to check on him.

I held Alexei's hand tightly and kissed him all over his face as I reckon that this is going to be the last time that I'm going to see him for a very long time.

"I'm sorry Alexei. I am so sorry if it has to end like this. Please wake up soon? You can visit the twins anytime you wish. Just please wake up. Your brother needs you. And the twins need you." My heart is honestly torn between still hating him for what he and his brother did and not wanting to leave because of his condition.

"Belle, dear, may I speak with you?" Asked Matushka as she enters our room. I quickly wiped the tears from my eyes and my face because I do not want her to see that even in surrender, I'm still miserable. To my utter surprise, she slowly knelt in front of me while looking down on the floor.

"Matushka."

"It was my fault."

"Please, don't do that Matushka. What's the matter?"

"Princess, I was the one who insisted to your husbands to give Yelena our last goodbye. I prepared the memorial. I was the one who arranged that room to look like Yelena's room without Nikolai and Alexei's knowledge. I placed your wedding gown in that room because I was thinking that Yely would have looked so beautiful in that dress too."

I did not know what else to say at this moment. I am so confused no words are coming out of my mouth.

"The first time we met that night when Alexei brought you to my house. I became obsessed with the thought that finally-finally I can make things right with Yelena. That you are our redemption."

I remember that night and as I recall, she indeed calls me Yelena the first time we met. And I also remember vividly how Alexei disapproved of it. Disapproved of how his mother looked at me and called me Yelena.

"Please." I pulled her carefully from the floor and helped her sit down on the chair. "Why did you think that I was your redemption? I don't understand Matushka."

"For years I refused to accept that Yelena's death was because she ended her own life. I insisted that someone out there was responsible for her death when all this time I have known the truth. I manipulated my sons to believe that she did not kill herself but someone did. I made Nikolai and Alexei replace the person behind her death for years."

The shock and disappointment are making my stomach churn. I could not believe that Matushka could do that to her own sons.

"You lied to your sons and told them that Yelena was killed by the Mafia's enemies when in truth, she killed herself? She committed suicide by crashing her car but all this time you made Nikolai and Alexei chase someone who does not exist since there was no one responsible for her death but herself!?"

"I wanted to protect-"

"Protect what? Who? Do you know how Nikolai and Alexei suffered because of that Matushka?! Everyday of our lives, your sons blamed themselves for what happened to Yelena. Yours and Yelena's selfishness have ruined Nikolai and Alexei!"

This time tears are flowing down her face uncontrollably. She covers her mouth with her shaking hands, she could not even look me in the eyes.

"Did you tell them the truth? Please tell me you told them the truth."

"I told Nikolai and Alexei the truth. They left the mansion after the church service on the memorial day because of that- because of what I have done. All of these happened because of me. So please blame me princess, but I beg of you to please talk to Nikolai."

I feel like there's a lump in my throat that is slowly suffocating me as we head to our first and probably last divorce conference with my lawyers and Nikolai's lawyers. I'm in the car with Amy and Devon as Nikolai's men escort us to the venue.

I'm holding the papers folded together that I was supposed to read as a condition before Nikolai signs the divorce papers. I was told that he was on the way to the meeting as well. Moments later my phone rang and it's Nikolai.

"Baby." He said, his voice calm and it almost feels like a soft whisper to my ear.

"Nikolai."

"Were you able to read the letters?" He asked almost jittery.

I'm holding the folded papers in my hand tightly and to be perfectly honest, I'm so afraid of what I might replace out if I read this. Matushka's revelation was something I was not prepared to hear, but it was the inevitable truth.

"Yes. I've read it." The words rolled out of my mouth as I resign to my fear and lie to him.

It took him a while to respond, but when he finally did, his voice sounded more like saying goodbye than what the words actually meant.

"Belle, ya lyublyu tebya."

He ended the call as I was left staring at the folded papers in my hand. My teardrops have blotted the paper revealing some letters written in beautiful cursive.

There's an old paper attached to a newer one. It's Yelena's letter to Nikolai.

My dearest Nikolai,

I terribly miss you. They still would

not let me visit you and it makes me really sad. The house is not the

same without you and Alex. Papa has again set his eyes to replace a man for me to marry. Someone from

Colombia who is a son of Papet

friend believe his name is Sebastian. I don't like him that

much. He laughed at me when I fell over a puddle so I threw a handful of mud at him. You should have seen his face, it was funny! Papa got upset and told me that he will just marry me off to uncle Artemis' son instead. He knows that I don't like Artan. He is arrogant and thinks of himself as better than you. No one is better than you.

You are the one I want to marry someday Nikolai. You told me that you will protect me and love me as your sister, but why wouldn't you promise to marry me? I asked you so many times before but you ignore

my questions. Matushka said that I cannot marry you because you are my brother and I should never say a word about this again especially to Papa Vyacheslav and Papa Viktor.

Nikolai, I don't care what they say, you're still the one I want to marry. I don't care if you are my brother. I will still love you until I die.

I miss you so much. Everyday, I will be waiting for you to come home.

Love,

Yely.

Nikolai's Letter to Belle

To my beauty,

By now you would have read one of the letters sent by Yelena when I spent time in the facility. My relationship with my sister is complicated. I did not think to talk about it with you in the past because I did not realize that it will greatly affect my relationship with you. This was my mistake and I regret not doing this at the right time.

I love Yelena but not the same as how she felt for me. I loved her as my sister, nothing less and nothing more than that. At first Papa and Matushka thought that it was something that she would outgrow and

forget in time but they were wrong.

Her obsession to marry me was the

reason why Papa wants to arrange a man to marry her when she comes

of age. Yelena hated Papa because of that. Things started to get worst

when she to tried to kill herself after Papa sent her to boarding school. She had to stay at home so we can

look after her to make sure it never happens again. For years, she let go of herself, doing drugs, drinking alcohol and dating every guy that

came her way. We were slowly losing her right before our eyes. When we found out that Papa had

planned to send her off to a rehab facility in Moscow, I knew that she was not going to make it there. I tried to talk to my father but he did not believe that Yelena will change for the better. Alexei and I made a decision to save her from being sent off to Russia by convincing Papa Vyacheslav and Papa Viktor that having a baby.

Yelena and Alexei at

At that time, Yelena was already pregnant with Aria. As to my brother, he was, at that time, in love with her

so he was willing to play the ruse

with us to cover up what's really going on with Yelena. Alexei and Yelena played the part in front of Papa and the people around us. Soon after that, their wedding was planned.

But when Pa Vyacheslav and Pa Viktor died everything came spiraling down quickly. The Mafia was unstable because the elders doubted if I can run and lead the Volkov Mafia at my age. They doubted me from the very beginning but I know that I did not have to prove myself to them. I am my father's blood. I am a Volkov and they'd have to kill me to overthrow the leadership.

After Yelena gave birth to Aria, she did nothing but to hate me. She came back to her old ways. Yelena tormented herself because she knows that's the only way that she can get my attention.

And then that unfortunate night happened. I was leaving for Boston. She was begging to come with me but I told her that she should stay home because she's not well. She went hysterical, ran away, and drove off, crashing her car to her death.

Later on, Matushka found a note in her room leaving Aria to Artan if anything happens to her. She made it clear that the baby girl will grow up in her father's without interference from the Volkov family. We all

respected her wish. I believed Matushka when she said that the crash could possibly be done by the Mafia's enemies. We were ready to believe that convenient reason because behind all that was our own denial of our faults and regrets. I regret arguing with her that night. She would not have run away if only I let her come with me to Boston. I could have done more for her.

Now I have done that same mistake again. I could have done better to take care of you and love you as my wife but I did not. You believed that Yelena and I had a romantic relationship because somewhere along the way, I unintentionally made you feel and think that way. What the Albanian did on your birthday was what I should have done as your husband. I broke your heart on your own special day. This one

will haunt me to my grave.

That day, I was so occupied with burying my past that I have lost sight of my present which all that should have mattered.

Belle, I have never loved a woman as much as I have loved you. I am in love with you and you alone. Absolutely nothing can change that. Not even that goddam broken heart fucking syndrome shit the doctor

diagnosed me of.

Without you, there's nothing really left for me now.

Forgive me,

Beast

Belle's POV

I begged Devon to drive as fast as he can to the meeting place. I need to be there before it's too late.

"B. What's going on? Are you okay?"

"Yes, I just need to see Nikolai before the meeting," I replied while dialing on my phone. It's just been ringing but he's not answering.

Thank goodness the building is already right in the corner. My hands are shaking and my heart is pounding inside my ribcage as we pass through the entrance and head our way to the elevator. I am not sure

about what's going to happen but what I am certain is that I want to see Nikolai and tell him that I do not want to lose him.

The scene right after Nikolai asked Belle on the phone if she has read the letters.

Nikolai had to compose himself after ending the call. Belle has read the letters but she sounded indifferent and still want to push through with the divorce. He went to Belle's parents who are now in one corner

of the table waiting for their daughter to arrive.

He kisses the mother's forehead and reached for her hand to pay his respect. He then reaches for the General's hand and connected it to his forehead.

He then instructed his lawyers to agree to everything that Belle wishes in the divorce, she gets 3/4 of all the wealth of Nikolai with an addendum that should he die, the remaining wealth will redound to the

benefit of his ex-wife and the twins.

The conditions were quickly attached in the divorce settlement papers already prepared for by the lawyers of the Galves'. Copies were printed right there and then. The only thing that will complete the

agreement is Nikolai's signatures.

Belle's mother got teary-eyed seeing how Nikolai looked at the documents in front of him in its final form, waiting for his signature. Even his men surrounding him looked like they were all holding their breaths.

He glanced at his phone one last time before he finally signed the papers. It was swift and systematic as one of his lawyers was pointing to where he was supposed to sign.

Belle's POV

He signed the papers. Nikolai signed our divorce papers.

When we arrived at the conference room, what was left was the divorce documents on the table already signed for by Nikolai.

"B, this is what you want right? Nikolai signed your divorce papers. You are free!" Amy said, looking at me intently, but so unconvinced and doubtful of my reaction. I looked at her, Devon and my parents pleading for them to understand what I'm about to do at this very moment.

"Papa, Ma, I don't want to divorce Nikolai."

The lawyers looked at me like a grew a horn, Amy gasped in surprise, my mother's jaw dropped in utter shock while Papa and Devon just looks at me with a weary and perhaps disappointed reaction.

I gathered all the papers and shove them all down the shredder in the corner.

I want to run so bad but given my condition, walking alone feels like a friggin sprint for me. I looked over the glass window and saw black SUVS still parked by the building. That means Nikolai is still here.

I hurriedly pulled up my dress so I can walk as fast as I can. Amy and Devon did not have much of a choice but to come with a deranged pregnant woman.

"This is crazy, you're crazy you know that right?" Amy said with a smile of surrender on her face like she actually gave up on even bothering to counsel me.

I dialed Nikolai once again and this time he answered in two rings as I approach the exit near them.

"Nikolai."

"Baby? I mean, ex-baby?"

"Nikolai!"

He chuckled.

I was so close to him when all of a sudden there are men who arrived in black cars with blinking lights that quickly surrounded the Russians' entourage. They made them drop one by one on the ground facing

down while pointing guns at them. Our men did not have a choice but to oblige as they were disarmed forcefully.

This time, they surrounded Nikolai while pointing guns at him and screaming at him to be on his knees.

At this point, nothing else really mattered in my mind. Nikolai needs me. My husband needs me. I don't know where and how I got my strength but I ran to my husband and wrapped my arms around his neck.

"Baby, no no no no!" Nikolai begged frantically.

"No Nikolai! I'm coming with you! Wherever they take you, I'm coming with you!"

"Don't shoot! Don't shoot! Don't fucking shoot at her or I fucking swear to god!" Nikolai warned while his hands are raised behind his head.

"Hold your fire! Stand down!" Someone ordered the other men.

"Baby, go to Devon right now. He's right there. Look at me, you need to go with him. I got this okay?"

I can see that Devon and another guy are closing in to take me so I took the remaining moments to kiss Nikolai on his lips, which my husband reciprocated with a long and deep kiss.

"I love you Nikolai."

"Ya lyubyu tebya my baby."

As I was pulled away from him, Nikolai knelt on the ground as they handcuff and arrest him.☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐