I Shouldn't Love Him
I Shouldn’t Love Him – Chapter 41

Marie’s point of view

He is sincere. He loves my daughter, I can see that. Telling him the whole truth is the best thing to do, maybe I’m making a mistake.. maybe not. I just know that if I let him get away with all these lies, I won’t be at peace. I’m sorry Liya but it’s for your happiness and for him that I’m going to reveal everything.

— I’m listening to you, Marie, what do you have to say to me? “Xavier says impatiently, his jaw clenched.

I take the last sip of my drink, wondering where am I going to start.

— The child…the baby is indeed Liya and Gabriel’s…”

His tired face expresses the surprise and confusion.

— Ga… Gabriel? How ? you just told me that it’s Yanis’s.. It’s impossible! She had lost him before my eyes and…and the baby that I saw with her seemed small enough for him to be Gabriel’s child, stop your little game and tell me the truth. b***d !

I filled my lungs deeply with air while shaking my head from side to side.

— No, I lied to you, the child is Gabriel’s. Liya was expecting fraternal twins…I know it may seem strange but it’s the truth. She lost one and the other miraculously survived. But my daughter suffered a lot

Xavier, her baby was born early and sickly. We take care of him as best we can and he is starting to get better, thank God.

He absorbs my words with a thoughtful look and scratches the back of his head nervously.

— She didn’t lose him…I’m really relieved that she was still able to have a piece of Gabriel close to her. I felt guilty about Marie every day, that day when the b***d flowed between her legs had haunted me day and night, her face filled with contempt…I…

He covers his face with his palms and murmurs incomprehensible words

– And for the rest ? With Yanis? ” he continues

— hmmm Yanis, .Yanis is my husband

A nervous laugh comes out of his trembling lips following my declaration, and in the next second he bursts out laughing so loudly that he attracts the curious gaze of the other customers who us surround.

— Marie, you don’t care about me, right? How can I believe you? Who tells me that all this is just a lie? I saw them, they kissed before my eyes, unless your girl flirts with her father-in-law without you knowing.

— Stop derailing Xavier, look at the wedding ring I’m wearing, do you think I’m having fun? Yanis is indeed my husband. The k**s was planned, Yanis did that to protect Liya, he did this to keep you away from her.

— A-ha to get away from her?, he gives a grin on his lips.

— Yes, since the death of his brother and Liya’s pregnancy, he has become close to her and they get along very well fortunately. You did a lot of harm to Liya or rather to us Xavier.

— I know it Marie, I know it, believe me I bitterly regret my actions..”

I place my hand on hers and her bruised blue eyes meet mine.

— Nothing is too late Xavier, go to him..

— Wait, wait, are you asking me to go to your daughter when I was your ex-fiancé and you hate me? This is strange I replace, logic dictates that you keep me away from her, right?

— All this is in the past, now I am married and happy. And it’s my daughter’s happiness that counts. For two years she hasn’t been the same, something is missing. She rejects all the men who approach her, she wants us to believe that she has a heart of stone but a mother is never wrong, she suffers Xavier and my heart tells me that you are her remedy. Go conquer her, don’t ruin your happiness on a whim by going and marrying someone else…there I said it all…do what you have to do.

He looks at me lost, assimilating each of my words, I hope you will react Xavier…as you should. Seeing no reaction from him, I gently pat his hand and get up to leave the table. but he holds me, circling my wrist, gets up in turn and takes me firmly in his arms, placing his head in the crook of my neck.

— Thank you Marie. thank you for everything…, he whispers.

I respond to his hug and whisper to him in turn.

— Liya’s happiness is in your hands..

I release her hold, after one last smile I turn my back on her and leave the place somewhat relaxed.

A few days later ….

Liya’s point of view…

— Yanis? ” I called out to him when I entered my home and closed the door behind me.

– Yanis where are you? “

Still no answer. I put my little groceries in the kitchen and go up to my room. I enter the room discreetly, and what I see moves me and brings a smile to my face.

My little princess sleeps peacefully on her uncle’s chest and he holds her tightly against him as if his life depended on it. I approach them without making any noise, I gently take my daughter in my arms and I lay her down on her cradle, taking care not to wake her. I look at her with a smile on her lips, she sucks her thumb with her head thrown back, this bitch sleeps like her mother, in all possible positions unable to stay still…my little wonder that I love so much.

My day of training exhausted me today, my body can’t even hold on anymore

standing . I put pressure on my sore neck to try to ease the pain. I feel two warm palms placed on my shoulders and Yanis’ breath against my neck.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” I apologized without turning around. still contemplating my daughter.

He doesn’t say anything and just gives me a massage…my shoulders, my arms. my neck and I m**n with happiness feeling a heavy weight being released from my body.

– You don’t seem in good shape to me…, he notes, increasing his pressure and I grab onto the cradle to hold myself together.

— Hum, long night and hard day let’s say… I… you must be hungry, I’m going to prepare lunch.

— Shut I don’t want anything, come this way, he pulls me towards the bed and lays me down next to him, I snuggle up against him, my head on his chest and listen to the slow beat of his pensive heart.

— Tell me what’s wrong..

He tenderly strokes my hair, like always, he’s always there for me. I never imagined that one day I would appreciate Yanis so much who is now my father-in-law…I admit that all this is strange but I have gotten to know him and I know that I can always count on him on him..but there is something that bothers me..The memories of this

night came to my mind.

Flashback ***

My daughter has just fallen asleep, I’m looking for Yanis in the living room when I see her on the balcony with a cigarette between her fingers.

“We agreed that you wouldn’t smoke in my house,” I scolded him.

I expected him to smile but instead he looked serious.

– You trust me ? ” he asks suddenly.

– Um… yes, why this question? ” I asked, lost.

A smile lights up his face, I don’t understand this change in mood.

He approaches me, circles my cheeks with his palms, I expect him to k**s my temple as usual but my eyes widen when he places his lips on mine and he k****s me gently.

— Xavier… is here…, he breathes against my lips.

In shock my body does not react immediately. I don’t respond to his k**s or push him away from me…Xavier is there..Xavier is…my God, why is my heart beating so fast all of a sudden? I am about to push Yanis away but he surrounds my waist bringing me closer to his body and deepening his k**s.

I understand his game, he wants to make Xavier believe that we are together, but that’s not what I want, not with Yanis who is my father-in-law for goodness sake! I’m not the type of person Xavier will think, no I’m not going out with the man who was supposed to be my teacher, my late boyfriend’s brother and my mother’s boyfriend..damn Yanis why did you do that

?

I hear a car driving at high speed…it must be him…I

violently push Yanis away, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand.

– Liya I..

– Leave me alone, take Yanis out, please ” I said trembling not being able to look him straight in the eyes.

End of flashback ***

– I blame you for kissing him, said – I in a tone of reproach.

Yanis immediately tenses up against me and depends the next moment

– I..I’m sorry but it was the only solution I had found when I saw him not far from us, and. unless you wanted him..

— No..no, I don’t want him to come near me..

— So what’s the problem? “

— Yanis I don’t want to be taken for a slut being with you

let’s see.

He stays silent for a moment then speaks.

—Why does it matter to you so much to know what he might think of you?

This time it’s me who remains silent, why? I don’t know ! He’s right, and Xavier is going to get married soon, he doesn’t care about me at all.

— I think it’s time for me to go, my break is over and my work calls me, he said suddenly.

I immediately stand up with a shy smile on my lips and nod. After he k****s his niece who is still sleeping, I accompany him to the door.

— I’m sorry again Liya. Let’s forget what happened, okay? “

—Hmm…but know that next time if you try to k**s me again for some reason, you will bitterly regret it, dear father-in-law, I teased him to lighten the mood. His lips

quirked stretch with a frank smile. he approaches me. circles my

cheeks with his palms, and k****s me for a long time on the forehead with a noisy k**s that makes me smile.

— See you tomorrow then..

I nod head and wave at him before closing the door and replaceing myself alone. Forgetting..easier said than done

I huff loudly and head to the kitchen to make myself a

sandwich before my baby wake up. I start to cut my

bread when the bell rings. It’s not true Yanis, he knows that his niece is sleeping and he rings the bell! What could he have forgotten this time. I wake up. rushes to open it to scold him, the door opened wide, my body freezes at the sight of an imposing build, a black suit, a hard face, and…his electric eyes…that is he doing there?

Not knowing what to do, I suddenly slammed the door in his face and leaned against it with my heart beating wildly.

— Open up for me Liya…

His voice reaches me immediately, and I can’t help but close my eyes to this devilishly hoarse sound that I had missed.

– What are you afraid of ? “

Of what? Of you Xavier, of your power to make me lose all control, of your gaze which manages to read in me, of the hurtful words that you could throw at me again. —

Open this door, give me a few minutes and I will ‘I’ll go, I promise,

Just for a few minutes, right?

My body reacts on its own and I open the damn door for him, inviting him to

come in.

My eyes follow him as he sits comfortably in the living room. , one ankle crossed on his knee, his beautiful watch on his wrist and the sleeves of his shirt slightly raised reveal his forearms which makes him atrociously attractive…he still has not lost his charm, on the contrary even more irresistible ..and always inaccessible…forbidden.

— So what do you want from me?, I asked calmly, trying to hide my confusion.

— Sit down, please.

Arms crossed around my chest, I don’t move an inch and tell him that I’m fine like this… My reply draws a sigh from him.

—Your lover isn’t here? ” he asks with a raised eyebrow, looking everywhere.

– No, as you see, I got annoyed.

His steel blue eyes stop on my person, they wander along my body, my bare feet, my legs covered in jogging pants, my white tank top and my face. His gaze is so intense that it makes me uncomfortable…this simple look that ignites all my senses. — I couldn’t…

from the beginning. I know you too well Liya. You would be incapable of being with Yanis, it’s not all you, he blurted out in a whisper. What is

he talking about?

– I I’m definitely with Yanis. If you don’t want to believe me, that’s…

“It’s ridiculous Liya,” he cuts me off.

He then stands up to his full length with his hands buried in his pockets, he approaches me until he is at my height and tilts his head to the side, staring at me strangely.

— I know everything, you hear everything, so stop lying to me! Your mother

told me everything.

I take a step back in shock, my mother…she promised me she wouldn’t say anything…damn she promised me!

— Why all this lying?”

I am trapped, now that he knows the truth I have to replace something else to keep him away. The few centimeters that he reduces destabilize me and prevent me from thinking properly. — That

I Whether you lied or not doesn’t change anything, what I want is clear!”

— No, it’s not clear, tell me Liya! , he orders me, getting closer

and closer, which makes me step back at the same time.

My legs are trembling, I won’t be able to bear the intensity of his wild gaze. I must not give up, not now.

I jump when the cries of crying are heard; relieved to be able to escape from this man, I hasten to climb the stairs and reach my room. My princess moves in all directions with tears on her cheeks. I immediately take her in my arms, she firmly grips my neck, her head nestled in the crook of my neck. I sing her a little lullaby to calm her while rocking our bodies slowly. She sniffs loudly and her

eyelids become heavy again; I continue to pace back and forth with my treasure while stroking her soft hair as she likes and very quickly she falls asleep again. I k**s her on the forehead before

gently placing her on her bed.

— This little girl doesn’t look like you at all.

I almost forgot he was there and I hadn’t noticed that he was in the room.

— Indeed, it’s her father in miniature, I replied with a sad smile on my lips

— And..what’s her name?

—Gabriellela.

His footsteps resonate in this heavy silence, he approaches, again and again. He stops . It is her warmth and her wild birth that surround me now. My back is to him, he does not touch me but my whole body shivers at the proximity of our bodies which have become unknown.

My mind imagines a thousand and one scenes for the future, the best solution is for me to get rid of this Apollo immediately…yes but I don’t move a millimeter as if paralyzed.

The hairs on the back of my neck stand up as his warm breath meets my skin. His presence seems unreal to me but is so desired. I knew how to keep him away from me for a good while. I hated him at the beginning yes, or rather I forced myself to do so because my heart could not hate him, this harmful man..Xavier

don’t leave me I’m begging you.

—I’m getting married tomorrow.

A few words are how he managed to bring me back to reality. He would have

could tell me something else, anything but not this deadly news.

I don’t react, not knowing what to say. Maybe I should congratulate him by hugging him like normal people would?

I bite the inside of my cheek when his warm chest clings to my back and his index finger brushes my bare shoulder, all the pleasant sensations they give me are forbidden to me, it has always been forbidden to me and that will never change…the truth is there, it will never belong to me.

— Stop me Liya. Stop me from making this serious mistake,

he whispers in his begging and captivating voice.

Why will I do it? Is he aware of what he is asking me? I, little Liya, would never dare to do this act…destroy a marriage.

I swallow hard not knowing what to answer, knowing it with another is so painful to me. How is she ! Surely much more beautiful and mature than you. Yes it’s sure ! His large palms on my slumped shoulders, he turns me so that our faces face each other. He looks at me, his blue eyes stare at me for a long time. Does he see how much I suffer? The power of my desire for him? The indefinable love I have for him?

“Don’t push me away,” he whispers, leaning towards me so that his thin lips brush against my feverish forehead.

That’s the last thing I want, for you to go away. I would love to jump on your neck, wrap my legs around your waist, bury my fingers in your hair, feel their soft texture again, place my head against your neck

and feel your pulse beating against my temple, I would love so much that you simply belong to me.

—Give us a second chance. Let me prove to you that I’m not that a*****e you knew. I will take care of you like no other…and of your baby who will be ours…I want you! My body, my soul and my heart cry out for you. Let’s just try together..

I don’t know what marks me more, his unreal words or his gaze shining with that fascinating glow that is…love? A declaration…he wants me he said, this is very mutual. But I can never do it…give us a second chance! And besides, should I believe it? I’m lost .

We are not meant to be together. It belonged to my mother and

will be with another one tomorrow. Let us forget ourselves as we did, that is better for him and for me.

He stares ardently at my lips and his come dangerously close..The contact of our lips..His teeth biting me to

force a passage into my oral cavity..our tongues caressing each other..

“Don’t you dare… don’t k**s me,” I spat in a voice full of contempt that surprised even me before he kissed me.

He takes a step back with his eyes wide open…yes, that’s it, go away.

— I don’t want to try anything with you…I just want to live my life peacefully away from you, I whispered, my throat tight with all the lies thrown around.

He remains silent for a long moment, his eyebrows furrowed and his lips pursed.

— Tomorrow, if I don’t see you during the ceremony. everything will be clear and I won’t bother you anymore.. Were these last words before he left my house and left me alone, feeling a great emptiness inside me.

My tears flow immediately and I collapse heavily to the ground with my hand against my mouth trying to control my sobs…goodbye Xavier!