Interstellar
4

Later that night, Nova felt a strong urge to continue her journey. She laid between Leon and Stella in their bed, each cuddled in the crook of her arms. She felt an overwhelming wave of guilt for wanting to run off, the afterglow of the evening fading into the realization that this is not where she’s meant to stay. Her heart ached for the pair at her sides, knowing they had welcomed her into their home and their Goddess-protected covenant without question, and how heavily she was contemplating leaving while they slept in spite of that kindness. Cohen’s words continued to haunt her, having proven to be prophetic. Could her presence be problematic? She whispered “yes” to the memory of his question, as if he would hear the answer. The last thing Nova wanted was to disrupt the pack who had been so accepting of her, but she felt she had crosed a boundary by accepting Leon’s advances. It took some time, but she was eventually able to move the sleeping mates enough to slip out of the bed without waking them. Nova looked upon them fondly while putting on her shirt, a sad smile splitting her face at the passionate memories made earlier in the evening, before she quietly left the room. After returning to her guest suite, Nova looked at herself in the vanity mirror above the dresser. She lifted the hem of her shift to see large handprints still darkening her upper thighs. Her neck was covered in deep purple kiss marks that she knew trailed down her shoulders and back, and across the expanse of her chest. There would be no hiding just how problematic she had become if the rest of the pack saw her like this.

Nova undressed and fell back onto the bed, her smile long faded as she stared toward the ceiling. She would enjoy a final night’s rest and sneak out in the morning before the others would awaken. Thankfully, sleep was quick to take her.

Hours later the bed dipped and stirred Nova awake. She turned toward the new presence and slowly blinked, willing her tired eyes open. “Leon?”

“Why did you leave,” he whispered, his voice a husky mix of annoyance and disappointment. He reached out to lay a hand on her bare stomach, this thumb rubbing small circles just below her navel. She sighed at his touch and leaned up into his hand.

“If I stayed and woke up between you two, it would have been too hard to leave in the morning.”

Leon tensed and withdrew his touch. He stared at Nova so intently she could feel the anger radiating from him. “You’re not leaving-” Nova attempted to speak up, but he snarled to cut off her interruption, “I said you’re not leaving!” Leon moved to hover over the girl and straddled her hips. He gripped the sides of her fearful face and was instantly regretful of his tone. He lowered himself against her body, his mouth taking hers apologetically. She gave into him immediately, her body reacting as it had so many times before. Compliance had kept her safe in the past, and she desperately hoped he would not gaze into her eyes to see the fear and anger behind them.

Minutes passed before Leon slowed himself, recognizing that the passion from earlier had not returned to the woman beneath him. His hands traveled from her cheeks to her shoulders, feeling tense muscles rippling beneath his fingers. He broke the kiss to gaze down at her, his body stilling as he found tears in her eyes. His hands returned to her cheeks, thumbs gently wiping her tears. “Do you know the power you hold over me?”

“We hardly know each other.” Her breath hitched, the words a struggle to release. Compliance did not include speaking. She feared his response more than she feared the memories of another that his touch elicited.

Leon grazed his lips across hers before kissing a trail to her neck, following his mate’s previous path. He craved the passion from earlier, that desire unknowingly blinding him from seeing the woman beneath him as she was rather than how he wanted her. He bit down on the tender flesh where her neck met her shoulder, suckling the skin trapped between his teeth. She trembled silently beneath him until he released her neck and licked across the puncture wounds he’d left. He stared deep into her eyes, still glazed with tears he gravely misunderstood. “You’ve already shown us your soul,” he dropped a hand between her legs, gently brushing her sensitive skin, “and I have seen enough to know it’s too soon for you to go.”

Nova retreated into her memories. When she looked at Leon, she did not see him. She saw her chosen mate, the man she poured years of love into, who only gifted scars in return. Clarity came with a shift in the clouds, moonlight dispersing the shadows from her past, and Leon’s pleading eyes once again looked into her own. “You can’t give me what I need. I’m sorry, Leon.”

He lowered himself to her chest, collapsing into her. He breathed in deeply, her sweet earthy scent intoxicating him. The thought of never holding her again was misery. “Do you even know what you need?” he sighed against her chest. He could provide her everything she could ever want.

Nova never responded, and Leon didn’t push further. They laid in silence, Leon embracing her until he fell asleep. Nova laid awake, feeling the rise and fall of his chest against her own. She used each passing moment to untangle her past from her present, separating the man sleeping on her chest from the monster in her mind.

At some point in the night she slipped away from him once he rolled off her. She continued to watch the steady rise and fall of his chest, listened for the soft heavy breaths of his slumber. She could not understand why he craved her so, or what soul he thought he had seen. She had been satisfied to be a notch in his bedpost, or even just a distraction. More than anything, she had been satisfied to have that fire within her restored, even if only briefly. She did not blame him for his reaction to her leaving, and she had expected it. Her fingers gently grazed the mark where her neck met her shoulder, the skin numb but sticky from half-dried blood. The only things she felt were sadness for the man asleep in her borrowed bed, and guilt for allowing him to get this close to her. She silently slipped from the room and closed herself in the other guest suite, curling up on top of the bed before the gravity of her grief crushed her to sleep.

At the first sign of dawn, Leon slowly woke to replace himself alone in Nova’s bed. The scent of her fear lingered in the blankets long after the warmth from her body had gone. Pain rose within his chest as he recalled his last moments before sleep took him, hindsight offering full clarity of his actions. He had caused her fear. When he kissed her, she had not kissed him back. The intimate touch he had hoped would reignite their passion had left her trembling without a trace of pleasure. He had marked her and missed how her eyes glazed over as she retreated into her mind. He was no better than whatever she was seeking asylum from.

Leon ran out the front door mid-shift, sprinting well into the clearing as the door slammed shut behind him. He would run until he felt nothing.