Jaded Hearts
Chapter 37

Taylor

The guys left Tyson in the cells, chained to the wall. Morgan had attempted to talk Kade into at least unchaining him, but he refused. When you have Hades in your possession, you don’t take any chances. Three pack members were assigned to stay down in the basement and keep their eyes on him, two in wolf form and one in human form.

They had all their bases covered.

But even with everything settled down in the cells, Matt was not happy with me. At all. I knew it was a gamble trying to talk to Tyson, but I had to know why he was doing this, and I knew Matt would not allow it.

So, I made a decision that turned out to be the worst possible one. I followed Matt outside to the gazebo, where he took a seat and rested his head in his hands. I wanted to say something to him, but I knew there was nothing I could say. So, I just sat quietly and waited. Eventually, he decided to speak, but the anger lacing his words cut deep.

“Why would you deliberately put yourself and our child in danger like that? When you went down to the cells, you thought that Tyson was hired to kill you. Not me, but you. And you walked right up to him. Why?”

“I don’t know,” I whispered.

“No. You’ve got to do better than that. ‘I don’t know’ won’t cut it. Not now.”

Honestly, I didn’t even think about the consequences. I needed answers, and I was tired of sitting on the sidelines, watching my life play out before me. I wanted to take charge for once. “You were going to kill him.”

“I still am. What does that have to do with putting my baby at risk?”

“It’s my baby too, Matt. Don’t do that. I’m not a surrogate, carrying this child for you. I’m it’s mother.”

“Then why aren’t you acting like it?! You didn’t know what state he was going to be in when you got there. You didn’t know that he would be chained, or that you wouldn’t be able to get close to the bars. You had no idea what the environment was like, but you went anyway!”

“I needed to know! I needed to look him in the eye. My childhood crush was trying to kill me. I needed to see him as he told me why!”

“Oh, I see now. You risked everything just to see your crush again? Before your murderous fiancé got to him, is that it?”

He was taking this all wrong, twisting my words, and making it more than it was. And he was hurting himself in the process. “No. I know it was a stupid decision, but I wasn’t thinking straight. At one time, he meant something to me; he was like family. I felt like I had to try, maybe I could get through to him.”

“Taylor, I’d never want to control you. All I ever want to do is make you smile. But your life is in danger, and if something happens to you, I’d lose both of you. You can’t act without thinking like that anymore. When I told you to stay away from him, it wasn’t a means to control your life. It was to keep my family safe.”

“I get that now. And you’re right … I didn’t think. I’m so sorry.”

Even though I wasn’t hurt, I can’t imagine what it was like for Matt to see me standing before Tyson’s cell. It wasn’t fair to him for me to place myself in danger the way I did. He deserved for me to trust that he wanted the best for me. I didn’t have to fight him, and he didn’t want to rule me—he wanted to love me. Maybe I was still scarred from the past.

“Can you forgive me? Please? I swear I’ll never be so reckless again.”

“Being your fiancé is becoming a real pain in the a*s, Taylor Adams. You’re lucky you’re so damn sexy.”

I remember saying the exact same thing to him the morning I went into heat. The fact that he remembered almost brought a tear to my eye. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too. And I forgive you. Just let me keep you two safe, alright?”

“I promise.”

Matt pulled me into his lap, and I felt as his muscles began to relax underneath me. I never thought of the amount of stress all of this was on him. But he never complained. Not once.

“How are you holding up? Seriously. We’ve been getting one issue after another thrown at us, and you’ve been taking all of it. Are you alright?”

He rested his head on my chest and closed his eyes. He always felt the need to be strong for me, so I really loved moments like this where he would relax and just let me take care of him.

“I’m a little stressed, to be honest. I know that we are strong enough to make it through this cloud of bullshit, but it’s a lot. My position at work and my position in the pack require so much of my attention. And now I have you, a baby on the way, and your dream wedding to plan. I just don’t want to let you down.”

“It’s our wedding, not just mine. And yes, you have me now, so let me help. I’m the Gamma female, and you said I have responsibilities, so let me do them. Let me do my job and help you at work. You can’t do this all by yourself.”

I ran my fingers through his hair and heard him sigh. “And for the record, you could never let me down. Every day that you wake up is a dream come true for me.”

* * *

After our talk outside, I left Matt to go replace Morgan and see how she was doing. She was in the kitchen stress baking, so the countertops were covered in cupcakes, pies, danishes, and all sorts of sweet treats.

“Who’s going to eat all of this?” I asked after I swiped a cupcake and took a seat.

“There are hundreds of wolves here. They can have them.”

“Morgan, are you okay, sweetie?”

“I don’t know, Tay. My cousin is locked in the basement of my house, beaten to s**t and chained to a wall, and my boyfriend refuses to let him down or show him any mercy at all.”

“He was going to kill Matt, honey. He’s helping Drew.”

She slumped down next to me and shoved a danish in her mouth. “I know! And I don’t understand how he got to this point. He was so gentle when we were kids, and now he’s a hitman named Hades?! That’s not the Tyson I know and love.”

“Just know that the guys have agreed not to hurt him or kill him as long as he keeps up his end of the deal. So, when this is all over, maybe you can help him get his life back on track.”

“I hope so. And I’m sorry for what all of this has done to you. He agreed to kill your fiancé as long as he got you as payment. That s**t is just foul.”

“It is. I can’t deny that at all. Thankfully, it never came to that, so let’s keep it that way.”

The timer on Morgan’s phone sounded, and she hopped up and ran to the oven, pulling out three circle pans of perfectly baked chocolate cakes.

“Those smell incredible,” I said. My mouth started watering as soon as the chocolate hit my nose.

“German chocolate.… It’s for Kade. I was a b***h to him when he wouldn’t let Tyson go. He was just doing what was best for everyone. I need to apologize.”

“I’m sure he’ll love it. I’ve got to head out; Matt and I have somewhere to be, but I’ll talk to you later, alright? And talk to Alaia. I’m sure she can arrange a way to get all of these sweets out of here and to the pack.”

“It’s my gift to them. Their Beta female comes with a few skeletons, but she can bake an amazing apple pie.”

Morgan smiled at me as she started mixing up the frosting for Kade’s cake. She’d be alright. We all would. We just needed to hold on a little while longer.

* * *

I met Matt in the front yard, and we made our way to the waterfall. By this time, it was late in the afternoon, and the sun was just beginning to set. “Will it be alright with us being in the woods at night?” I asked.

“Of course. We always have patrols guarding the borders, so no one will be able to sneak in. And we’re the biggest things in the woods, so you unless you’re afraid of squirrels, I’d say you’re safe.”

“That’s good to know. So, how do I shift? Is it hard?”

“It’s not hard, but it’s painful. Your first shift is the worst because you’ve never felt your bones shift and rearrange themselves before. You don’t know what to expect, and it’s terrifying. It seems like it goes on forever. Each time you do it, it becomes easier and less painful. When I shift now, I don’t feel anything at all. It’s just as natural to me as breathing.”

“So, a lot of pain and fear. Got it.”

“And freedom. Connecting with your wolf is one of the best things you’ll ever experience. The first time you let her run free will be like nothing you’ve ever felt before. The pain and fear are temporary, but that bond is forever.”

“That sounds so much better. Now I feel like I’m ready.”

When we finally arrived, I took a minute to look around. It was so beautiful here, and I’d never get used to the way this spot made me feel. It felt like home.

“Okay, tesoro. Clothes off unless you want them shredded up when you shift.”

“Ohh, right. I forgot about that.”

I pulled everything off and placed it in a pile on the ground beside me. When I stood up, I noticed Matt checking me out. “Focus! How is this going to work if you’re distracted?”

“The most beautiful woman ever created is standing before me naked. How can I not be distracted?”

I crossed my arms over my chest and tapped my foot. His eyes kept roaming, but eventually, he pulled himself together.

“Fine. I’ll stay in my human form until you complete the shift so I can make sure you’re alright. You ready?”

“Yes. What do I do?”

“Close your eyes and focus on Ariel. When you reach her, relax and let her take control. When you feel the first hit of pain, don’t fight it. That’ll only make it worst. Just breathe through it and let her do what she needs to do. It only takes about thirty to forty-five seconds for a first shift. Maybe count down in your head to distract you until it’s all over.”

I took a few breaths and closed my eyes like he said. Alright, Wolfy Girl. You ready for this?

If you call me that one more time, I’ll make this shift take as long as possible. I swear I will.

Ha! You’re sassy as hell. You really are my spirit animal.

I like you too. And yes, I’m ready. Just relax and let me take control.

I cleared my mind, and after a few seconds, it felt like ants were crawling all over my body.

It’s just me; stay calm. We’re going to start the shift now. You’re strong, and we’re going to go quick. Just hold on.

That was when I felt the first pop and fell to my knees. It was like my back had been broken in two.

I focused on my breathing as my ribcage began to expand and elongate. My arms and legs dislocated, then moved to their new spots. Fire licked through my joints and veins. My h**s popped out of their sockets, making me fall flat to the ground.

“You’re almost done, baby. Just hold on,” I heard Matt say.

When my face began to elongate, and my nose transitioned into my snout, I thought my head would explode from the pressure. My eyes blurred, and my ears began to ring.

It had been twenty-five seconds. Maybe twenty more to go.

The itchy feeling moved to the forefront, and through my blurred vision, I saw fur begin to spring up on my hands, which were shifting to paws. One final jolt of pain replaced my nails with long, thick claws. Then it was all over.

I tried to push myself up, but standing on four legs when you were used to two was harder than it seemed.

“Just wait a minute, let yourself get used to your new form.”

I blinked my eyes and lifted my head to look at him. With my wolf vision, it was as if I could see every speck of dust in the air and smell every animal around for miles. It was almost sensory overload. But Matt was just as gorgeous as always. That would never change.

“Oh my god, Taylor. Your wolf, she’s …”

The look on his face had me extremely curious, so I pushed myself up and took my first shaky steps to the water to see my reflection.

Ariel was incredible. She had thick, snow-white fur and the most intense teal eyes. On the center of her forehead was a large patch of dark gray fur in the shape of a perfect crescent moon.

Ariel, you’re so beautiful!

I can’t believe it. I look just like The Mother.

The Mother? Who is that?

Selene, the Moon Goddess.

Oh, is that a good thing?

“Taylor? No, I mean Ariel…”

We turned around and looked at Matt, who was staring at us in awe. “You have the mark of The Mother. You’re a blessed wolf.”

I really wished I knew that this meant. It’s seemed like it was a big deal, but why would I have the mark? I was a “transitioner,” so there wasn’t anything great about me.

Can you hear me, tesoro?

Yes. I hear you, but I don’t understand what’s happening.

You’re special. I don’t know how, but you are. We’ll replace out the specifics soon, so just know that this is a good thing. The Moon Goddess has picked you out of all other wolves. She sees your value, even when you sometimes can’t.

This is unexpected, for sure. And I’m going to embrace it. Ariel is itching to meet her mate, so strip down, pretty boy. It’s time to let Logan out to play.