Kissed by Shadows: A Forced Proximity Dark Mafia Romance (The Shadowmen Book 1)
Kissed by Shadows: Chapter 13

When Nikolai leaves, it’s like all the wind has been taken out of my sails as I slump into Roman’s arms, tears silently tracking down my cheeks. How can I just let him go, knowing that his father is going to hurt him just so I can be somewhat free?

“Come on, Princess. Let’s get you inside and into bed,” Roman says gently, his strong arms practically holding me up as I rest my cheek against his firm chest.

I blink up at him, the tears on my lashes making everything sparkle like the frost outside. “He’s going to torture him, Ro. He used to do the most terrible things to him,” I whisper, bile stinging the back of my throat when I recall all of the ways Sergi made his own child suffer. There was always an undercurrent of darkness about Nikolai. I knew his father hurt him, beat him, all in a bid to mould him into the perfect soldier, the perfect, ruthless leader, but he could never stamp out the goodness that was at the heart of Nik.

“And the thing that will get him through all that is knowing that you’re safe,” Roman tells me softly, his hand brushing the tears from my face. “We all saw the way he looked at you, Princess. He’s given you to us, even though you clearly mean everything to him, because that’s how important you are to him.”

I take a sobbing inhale, knowing deep down in my soul that he’s right. Nikolai and I go a long way back. He was so often at my house that I assumed he’d always be there, the older boy who somehow enjoyed spending time with me. We were kindred spirits, both motherless, although Nikolai never spoke about his mum and never told me why she wasn’t around, and the one time I asked, he got so angry, so upset that I decided it was a subject best left alone.

The biggest difference between us, aside from the fact he was the son of a Russian crime lord and I was the daughter of an incredibly successful businessman, was my father was a person I loved dearly who not only loved me in return but showed it often. It’s what made his betrayal hurt so much, because I never would have thought he’d put me in any kind of danger. I guess I should have known that all was not as it seemed, given he had such a long-standing connection with Sergi. Obviously, some things my father was connected with weren’t all above board.

I can’t decide whether I still love my dad or if he’s now dead to me, and it bothers me. It should be a simple case of him doing something so unforgivable that I never want to speak to him again, right? Not this mixed-up churning where my mind keeps trying to reconcile the man who raised me with the man who sold me.

“Come on, Peaches, time for bed,” Hunter states, getting up and coming towards us before stopping in front of me. “Petrov wanted you to be happy as well as safe. He wouldn’t want you to spend the rest of the night crying over him.”

He’s right. They both are, and although the guilt eats away at something deep inside me, there’s nothing I can do to help the situation short of putting myself in danger and then it would have all been for nothing.

Taking Hunt’s warm hand in mine, my other reaching for Roman’s, we all file back into the flat, Rowan opening the door ahead of us.

“I’ll run you a bath, Little Lamb,” he states, brushing my damp cheek with his fingertips, his eyes tracing over my face, a deep frown marring his brows.

“Thank you,” I whisper, feeling wrung out and just so fucking tired. It’s only been a little over twenty-four hours since my life was turned upside down, and already I’m exhausted.

Rowan gives me a nod before heading to my room.

“Would you like a hot chocolate?” Hunter asks, twisting to look back at me, his hand still clasped in mine. I nibble my lower lip, the decision seeming too overwhelming right now for me to make. Stupid really, but all I can think of is Nik going back to his father and the kind of punishment he will face. Fresh tears spill down my cheeks before I can stop them, a gasping sob breaking free from my lips. “Fuck, baby. Come here.”

And then I’m in Hunter’s huge arms, his minty smell engulfing me as I cry against him, Roman letting go of my hand, allowing me to tangle my fingers into Hunt’s soft jumper. Heat behind me lets me know that Roman is caging me in between them, and it feels so right to be here, yet so wrong that Nik isn’t with us.

“What the fuck did you do to make her cry more, Hunt?” Rowan asks as he storms into the room, looking two seconds away from ripping me from Hunt’s arms. His image is wavering as more tears fall down my cheeks, but even I can see the way his face is set in a scowl, his hands clenched into fists at his sides.

“Fucking chill, I just offered her a hot chocolate. She’s feeling overwhelmed right now and doesn’t need you taking her away from the comfort she’s getting,” Hunt states calmly, pulling me into his body even more until there’s no space between us.

“I–it’s o–okay, Rowan,” I hiccup, trying to take some deep breaths to calm down. “I just…” I trail off, knowing that whatever I say won’t be able to articulate how I’m feeling. Worried, guilty, heartbroken. I’m terrified that my feelings for Nik will upset them.

Rowan’s shoulders rise and fall as he takes a deep inhale and then huffs it out. “Your bath is running, Little Lamb.” Then he looks at Hunt, almost daring him to keep me from the comfort he is trying to offer. If I wasn’t so upset I’d replace the standoff between them funny.

“Let’s get you in the water,” Hunter says after a moment, tucking me under his arm while Roman steps away. Before he can get too far, I grasp his hand again and glance over at him.

“You’ll come too?” I ask, not even embarrassed that I want all of them with me. I just need to know that they’re here, because Nikolai isn’t and it feels like if I let the others out of my sight, something bad will happen to them too. My heart doesn’t care that I’ve only really known the twins for a day, or that I barely know Hunter any better.

“Of course, Princess. Wouldn’t want to be anywhere else,” he replies, giving me a boyish smile that has my lips twitching in a wobbly one in return.

With Rowan leading the way, we make our way through the flat, all the lights low, and rather than the prison I saw it as earlier, it feels cosy, safe. They lead me into my room where the sound of water rushing into the tub fills the space, a fragrant scent filling the air, and I pause, my eyes wide when we enter the darkened room.

Only, it’s not fully dark as what seems like a hundred candles cover all the surfaces and even some of the floor, their flickering light soothing.

“How do you have so much game?” Roman asks incredulously as I stare around the space, my chest expanding and a warmth filling my limbs at the sweet gesture.

“It’s beautiful,” I whisper as Rowan goes over to the large tub, dipping his hand in and testing the water. Seeming satisfied, he turns the tap off, then straightening up, he stalks back towards me before stopping in front of me, Hunter and Roman still grasping my hands.

“It’s not too much?” he asks, raising his eyebrows and offering a questioning gaze.

“It’s perfect,” I reply, getting lost in the swirls of his brown eyes. They’re subtly different from his twin’s, Rowan’s being more amber whereas Roman’s are a deep, chocolate brown.

A small smile flickers around his plush lips, then his hands reach out, grasping the hem of my jumper. “Lift,” he commands, and a breath gets caught in my throat when Hunter and Roman let go of my hands. They don’t move away though, just twist towards me.

Holding Rowan’s stare, I lift my arms up, goosebumps peppering my skin as his knuckles graze my flesh when he draws my jumper up and off me. For a moment, I’m blinded, unable to see their reactions, and then the garment is being tossed in the direction of the hamper. I can’t look away from him to see if it lands, his eyes molten as they burn a path across my skin.

Taking a short inhale, I reach for my lacy bralette, pulling that up and over my head, letting it fall to the floor as I watch Rowan swallow hard.

“Fuck, Peaches,” Hunter rasps from beside me, and I gasp when fingers take hold of the waistband of my harem trousers.

“You’re stunning, Princess,” Roman whispers as he tugs them down my legs, my knickers too, helping me out of them until I’m naked before them.

“Beyond a dream,” Rowan murmurs, his long fingers reaching out, trailing down my neck to the side of my breast and waist. His touch sends fire racing across my skin, my eyelashes fluttering even as my chest aches for the man who isn’t here. “Let’s get you in the water while it’s hot.”

Taking my hand, he leads me the few steps to the tub, keeping hold of my hand as he helps me into it. The water is the perfect temperature, not too hot or cold, and I can feel some of the tension drain from my muscles as I relax back into the warmth. Bubbles fill the surface, smelling of lavender, geranium, and camomile, soothing the heartache that moments ago threatened to drown me.

I watch as he kneels next to the tub, Hunter leaning against the shower, and Roman against the countertop.

“Thank you, Rowan,” I whisper, swirling my hands through the water, the bubbles shifting and eddying around me. His hand dips into the water, skimming over my heated flesh.

“Can I make you feel good, Little Lamb?” he asks, his intense stare fixed on my face. “Can I help you forget for a little while?”

I suck in a breath, my thighs clenching even as my chest tightens. “It feels like a betrayal, wanting you too,” I confess in barely above a murmur. My body wants what he’s offering, Evangeline practically panting for it, because we both know with Rowan’s attention to detail, the way he studies me so unwaveringly, it’ll be mind-blowing, but a part of me can’t help feeling that I shouldn’t be enjoying anything while Nikolai is probably hurting right now.

“He told you to be happy with us,” Rowan states, his fingers dancing along my hip, teasing. “And I want to chase the sadness from your eyes, even temporarily.”

I take in a sharp breath, my thighs parting when he brushes my mound, his fingers dipping down to stroke my clit. I hold his stare and don’t stop him as he circles the nub, pulses of pleasure shooting across my nerves, and I arch my back so my nipples are exposed to the air.

A tweak of my exposed nipple has my head turning to replace Roman there, kneeling, his fingers pulling and tugging the dark tip. My hands grip the side of the tub, my breath panting in and out of me as the twins work me over, Rowan never delving beyond my hardened clit.

“Please,” I beg in a rasp, my eyes landing on Hunter’s deep green orbs that look almost black in the candlelight. He stalks towards the bath, coming up on Roman’s side before dropping to his knees.

“Please what, Peaches?” he asks, his voice the huskiness of limbs gliding over linen sheets.

“Please, Daddy,” I shamelessly plead, Rowan not faltering for a second in his exquisite torture.

“Good girl,” Hunt coos, sliding his hand up my leg, a whimper slipping past my lips as he goes higher. “You’re going to come as soon as I tell you to, aren’t you, beautiful?”

“Yes, Daddy” I breathe out, widening my legs more, praying that he’s going to fill me with his fingers like he did earlier. My body is wound so tightly that I know it won’t take much for me to explode.

“So pretty, Little Lamb,” Rowan whispers, picking up the pace, the muscles of his arms bunching and coiling as he moves his fingers faster.

A deep moan leaves my lips as Hunter teases my entrance, my hips bucking as my body tries to get him where it wants him.

“Greedy too,” Roman teases, his hand cupping and squeezing my breast, my back arching more to give him all the access he needs.

“Ready?” Hunt asks, and I nod, even though I’m not sure if he’s talking to me or the twins as they both dip their heads as well.

Two thick digits slam inside me, and then he crooks them in a come-hither motion at the same time Rowan pinches my clit and Roman tweaks my nipple.

I fucking shatter with a desperate cry, the sound of water sloshing around me as my body seizes with the sheer force of my climax. Lightning races underneath my skin, my nerves firing in all directions as wave upon wave of ecstasy flows over me.

They don’t let up either, continuing to touch and caress me until they’ve wrung every last drop of release from my body and I’m a twitching, whimpering mess.

“Such a good, beautiful girl for us,” Roman praises, leaning down and taking my lips in a sweet, languid kiss. Kissing Roman is like stepping out into a bright summer day when moments before it was raining. My hands leave the tub to cup his cheeks, drawing him closer even as Hunt’s fingers are still buried inside me and Rowan’s still stroking and teasing my sensitive clit. Roman’s fingers tangle in my hair, massaging my scalp and leaving me moaning into his mouth.

I drink in all the light of Roman, letting the caress of his tongue soothe my inner turmoil, allowing me to breathe properly for the first time since I arrived back home to replace everything changed.

We slowly end the embrace, peppering each other’s lips with kisses and small licks like we’ll never get enough.

“Jesus, Princess,” Roman rasps against my lips, licking the lower one. “I could spend the rest of my life kissing you and it wouldn’t be enough.”

Blinking my eyes open, I move back just enough so I can look into his deep brown eyes. “You’re like sunshine,” I blurt out, my cheeks heating as I realise how stupid that sounds, but then his lips split into the most beautiful smile that steals my breath away.

“You’re like the stars, almost impossible to reach, but once you do…” he trails off, dipping down for another peck on my kiss-swollen lips. The motion of Hunter finally removing his fingers from my body has me gasping into Roman’s mouth. Rowan follows suit, and I finally release Roman to gaze at the other two men in the room.

“Thank you,” I whisper, heat travelling across my relaxed muscles at the loaded stares they are all casting my way.

“Anytime, Peaches,” Hunt answers before standing up, his voice lower than it usually is. My eyes widen at the impressive bulge in his jeans, and I swallow, remembering the musky, salty taste of him in my mouth and the silken feel of his dick as it stretched my lips. “It’s getting late, time to wash up and get to bed.”

I probably should bristle at his dominating tone, but something settles inside me as I follow his directions, the twins passing me all that I need to clean myself. Rowan holds out his hand and helps me from the tub, using a towel to dry me off just as his brother did this morning.

Hunter and Roman disappear before coming back, Roman holding out a pair of my knickers, helping me to step into them, and Hunt with one of his T-shirts, which he slips over my head once I’m dry, engulfing me in his wonderful, fresh scent.

With not a word spoken, Rowan takes my hand in his, leading me back into my room, the lights low and the covers on the bed turned down. I hesitate, sucking in my lower lip as I look at the expansive bed.

“What’s wrong, Little Lamb?” Rowan asks, and my gaze darts to him, his brows lowered as he studies me intently.

“It’s just…” I take a breath, deciding to give my mind a rest and trust my heart. “Will you stay with me? I don’t want to be alone.”

“Oh, I’m not leaving you,” he states, as if there was never another option, and the tightness I didn’t even realise I was carrying eases from my chest. Then my eyes skate beyond his to see Roman climbing into the bed wearing just a pair of fitted black boxer briefs, which are most definitely tented.

He gives me a lopsided grin that has my stomach doing a somersault. “As if I was going to let him have you all to himself,” he scoffs, shifting down until his head is resting on my pillow. Thank fuck the bed is a super king, otherwise, I’m not sure both boys would fit.

I smile, turning my attention to Hunter. His usually hard face is soft as he looks between the twins, then his gaze settles on me as he takes a couple of steps to close the distance between us.

“I’ve shit to sort out tonight, Peaches,” he tells me, his hands coming up to hold my face. “Be a good girl for the boys and I’ll see you in the morning.”

Before I have a chance to argue, his lips are on mine, his tongue demanding my obedience. I open for him without thought, sinking into his kiss. If kissing Roman is like stepping out on a sunny day, kissing Hunter is like the thunderstorm that fells trees and takes out power lines. He’s all hard dominance and sheer, unadulterated power that leaves no room for negotiation.

My heart is pounding, my breaths panting and my knickers damp as he tears himself away, his own chest heaving as his eyes swirl with the storm that was in his kiss. With a final stroke of his thumbs, he pulls away and leaves the room, my heart aching as I watch him go, wanting them all with me.

“I’m always fucking last,” Rowan grumbles, using his grip on my hand to tug me into his chest, catching me as I stumble into him.

His free hand slips into my hair, using it to angle my head in the way that he desires as his lips come crashing down on mine.

If Roman is the sun, and Hunter the storm, then Rowan is the frost that steals your very breath from your lungs, the ice that burns. All thoughts leave my head as he takes my lips hostage, licking inside my mouth as I allow him access. He is precision personified, his moves expert as he decimates me with his kiss, my core tightening at the dark promise in his embrace.

Achingly and slowly, he ends the kiss. “My brother was right, it will never be enough,” he whispers against my lips, my body trembling in his grip as his words settle inside my chest. He’s right. I want more from all of them, regardless of how short a time has passed. I guess extreme circumstances and all that. “Let’s go to bed.”

“Okay,” I breathe out, butterflies swirling in my stomach at the thought of sharing a bed with the twins. And they’re not wholesome thoughts.

“To sleep, Little Lamb. You need rest tonight,” Rowan instructs, the sound of Roman groaning making me smile and taking the sting from his brother’s words.

Rowan helps me to climb into bed, Roman reaching out and pulling my back to his front. His hard length presses between us, but he ignores it as I settle into his hug, watching as Rowan strips down to his underwear—bright red boxers—and then climbs in, lying down, facing me.

“Will he be okay?” I know Rowan will know I’m asking about Nikolai. He sighs, his fingers pushing back some of my hair, tucking it behind my ear.

“He’ll be alive. Sergi won’t kill his own son and heir,” Rowan answers, not exactly the reassurance I wanted. “But knowing that you’ll be safe will make anything else worth it, trust me, Little Lamb.”

“I hate being the cause of his pain,” I confess, the threat of tears stinging my tired eyes.

“Pain is how you know you’re alive,” Rowan tells me, shuffling closer to place his forehead against mine.

“Sleep now, sweetheart,” Roman encourages, placing a gentle kiss on my temple before snuggling down and eliminating any space between us.

I don’t think I’ll manage it, but the warmth of their bodies combined with the hot bath and orgasm soon have me slipping into a dreamless sleep.