Jaime and I spent about twenty minutes showing the girls and the crowd in the gymnasium the basic moves he showed me. I encouraged all of the girls to fold up their chairs, stack them up, and partner up to try out the steps while Jaime and I walked around to ensure they were being performed correctly.

The day is a hit, with lots of giggles and excitement, all wrapped up in an afternoon I genuinely feel good about. This is something young people, especially girls, should know, and this is the perfect avenue to do it. Ideas start circling in my mind, but I’m distracted when a now-familiar reporter comes up to me, his jaw tight and an iPad in his hands.

‘Hey, Miss Bordeaux, do you have a moment?’ I turn to Preston Smith, a reporter for the American Star Magazine and an absolute hater of mine. ‘I’d love to get a few words about your presentation and thoughts on self-defense for young girls.’

‘Oh, absolutely, I’d love to.’ He’s been at many of the events for the tour, but I’m not exactly excited to chat with him, seeing as most of the articles he writes for his paper haven’t been exactly glowing about me.

‘So you spent today teaching these young girls, ages eight to eighteen, about self-defense,’ he says.

It’s not a question, but I answer it as if it were all the same.

‘I did! It was a blast to show these girls how to protect themselves, stay diligent, and make it fun for them.’ I wave a hand toward where the young girls are all laughing and having a good time. ‘As you can see, they’re all enjoying themselves while learning an important life skill. I’m just so grateful for Regina and Anne, who gave me the opportunity to use this stage as a way to get more education to these girls.’ Maybe that will get me just a bit more into their good graces. Or maybe it will twist the knife a bit. Either way is a win.

‘Do you think that’s appropriate, though? Teaching young girls there is some bogeyman out there they need to defend themselves from?’

I frown at his question, both confused and irritated. Still, I put on my pageant face and answer.

‘I wish all women learned just a little bit of self-defense. I recently learned just how little I was aware of my surroundings and my safety, even with security around. I’m grateful to know how to protect myself; god forbid anything bad should happen. I, of course, hope and pray nothing happens to these girls, but I’m happy to give them these confidence-building skills everyone should have in their arsenal.’ A couple of the pageant girls around me nod in agreement, though Anne’s jaw goes tight with irritation.

‘Personally, I’d love a few more lessons myself,’ Miss Nevada, one of the other pageant contestants who attended the event, says with a smile. ‘After seeing what happened to you at that meet and greet, I realized I have no idea what to do in a situation like that.’

‘Me too!’ Miss California says.

I smile at Preston before turning to the girls. ‘Oh my god, yes, that would be so fun!’

All four of the other Miss Americana contestants in attendance nod except for Anne, who stands there with a tight jaw, her face almost as red as her hair.

‘It isn’t very becoming of women,’ Anne says through gritted teeth. ‘Being able to fight.’

I fight the roll of my eyes, smiling sweetly at her.

‘We’re just making sure we’re prepared for anything. Like you said, ‘Always be prepared.’’ My smile goes admittedly catty as she frowns at me and huffs in irritation.

God, it’s really great to see her bullshit backfire, and even better to make such delicious lemonade out of her disgusting fucking lemons.

‘As for lessons, I’m sure I could set something up either on an upcoming off day or after the tour. We could do an entire Miss Americana self-defense event, live stream it on social media.’

‘I love this idea! I think most of us will be in California next week,’ Cara, Miss California, says. ‘There’s a studio downtown that a friend of mine owns. If you all don’t have something planned, I bet we could set something up on one of Ava’s off days. We could even post it on the official Miss Americana page.’ She looks over her shoulder with a wide smile at Regina. ‘Isn’t that a great idea, Regina?’

I don’t know if it’s an unintentional dig or if, somehow, Cara knows about what a bitch Regina has been, but either way, the irritation that crosses Regina’s face is priceless.

‘I don’t believe we have anything planned for Thursday. It’s a day off for my tour, but I’d be happy to sacrifice that time for a good cause.’ I turn to Jaime. ‘You into teaching a few more pageant queens about self-defense?’

‘Anytime,’ Jaime says with a small, righteous smile that almost makes me laugh.

‘It won’t hurt to have a hot instructor, you know?’ Cara says with a hip bump, and I nod with a wide, comical smile.

But with the comment, Anne steps closer, listening to the conversation. The reporter’s eyes move to her, and she smiles wider before he speaks again.

‘About that instructor,’ the reporter says. I’d completely forgotten he was even there still, my mind rolling with ideas for a self-defense day. ‘One of your fellow contestants has implied you have a personal relationship with your bodyguard. As we all know, one of the main tenets of the Miss Americana pageant is to remain single. Have you upheld that so far?’

My gut drops to my feet with his words, a clear leading question, and with Anne smiling so close to me, I begin to wonder if this is another setup.

‘Kind of an off-topic question, don’t you think? We’re here to talk Girl Scouts and self-defense, after all,’ I say with a tight smile.

‘I’m interested to know, too,’ Anne says, and it takes everything in me not to let the irritations show on my face, instead keeping a sweet, pleasant smile on my lips. ‘Since you’re not supposed to be dating anyone while you hold the crown. Would be a shame to lose your title over a boy.’

I look at her and smile through the fucking daggers I’m sending.

What is this chick’s problem?

‘That’s such an outdated rule, Anne, and you know that,’ Cara says with an annoyed look. “Weren’t you bragging about a boyfriend literally days before the pageant? It’s misogynistic and stupid.’

Anne’s mouth opens to argue, but I decide it’s time to nip this in the bud before things get out of hand. I turn to Preston with an incredibly fake smile.

‘Jaime and I are just good friends,’ I say with an easy smile and a flick of my hand. ‘Anytime you spend more than a few days with a person, you’re bound to become friends. Unless you have no personal skills, you know?’ My eyes shoot to Anne, and I smile one last time. ‘Now, thank you so much for your time, but I do have to do a few more interviews and would like to chat with some friends before I go,’ I say, then walk off to literally anyone but Anne and this reporter.

‘You did good, Princess,’ Jaime says under his breath.

‘I hate this,’ I whisper. I hate keeping Jaime some secret, hate not being able to claim him as my own, to shout about it from the rooftops. But if today taught me anything, it’s that Anne is out for blood.

I spend the next thirty minutes making plans with Cara, who calls her friend to make sure we can use her studio while we’re in California, taking photos, and saying our goodbyes before Jaime leads me to the SUV, and I take my very first full breath of air since I walked onto that stage.

‘That was a setup,’ Jaime says once we pull out of the parking lot.

‘Yeah,’ I whisper, because I know he’s right. I just don’t know how or if I won this round. We drive in silence, each of us lost in our thoughts, and before I know it, we’re at the hotel.

‘Thank you,’ I say as he helps me out of the car, holding Peach in her carrier in one hand and giving me his other. ‘For helping me today. Really.’

‘I’ll always come to the rescue for you, Princess.’

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