Selene

The dream began in a forest I don’t recognize.

The territory seemed familiar enough, tall snow-capped mountains and thick, lush evergreens. Snow covered the ground, and wolf tracks dotted the pristine white surface for as far as the eye could see. Are those my tracks? I wonder dimly, glancing down at my feet. However when I look, I replace myself in human form. My pale, bare feet sink into the thick powder, and though my toes curl into the icey substance, I don’t feel any cold.

I’m wearing a long silvery gown, completely unsuitable for being out in these elements. My limbs are exposed to the frigid air, and as flurries of snowflakes fill the air around me, I realize they do not melt when they land on my skin. Something isn’t right. Why can’t I feel anything? Why can’t I tell if it’s night or day. Everything is so surreal and strange, I realize it must be a dream.

However, figuring out I’m unconscious does nothing to rescue me from this strange halfworld, instead the scene around me plays on as if I’m merely an observer rather than a participant. A young woman is trudging up the mountain on my left, bundled in heavy coats and hauling a duffel bag over her shoulder. Her belly swells with child, poking out of her clothes at a breadth that seems to indicate she’s about halfway through her term.

It’s my mother. Her blue and violet eyes glow from beneath her hood and her blonde hair flutters in whisps around her beautiful face. She walks past me as if she doesn’t see me at all, delicately moaning as she forges through the snow. Behind her trudges a tall, powerful wolf with hair the exact shade of mine. He’s dragging a sleigh full of luggage up the steep slope with a determined expression on his face.

My father.

I know even though I never met the man. Even though I never saw a single photo. He seems terribly familiar, protectively eyeing my mother as she struggles. I have to fight the urge to reach out and touch him. Like my mother, he moves past as if I’m not there at all, instead focusing on the she-wolf ahead. “Enough Corinne, you need to let me take that.” He instructs sternly.

“I’ve got it.” Mom insists stubbornly. “It’s only one bag, you have everything else.”

“You’re already carrying something far more important.” My father insists, closing the distance between them and taking hold of the duffel bag’s strap.

Before he can pluck the bag from her hold, the sound of a howl rises up in the distance, and my parents freeze in terror. No. I think desperately, I know what this is. I don’t want to see this.

“Run!” I tell them urgently, “Go now and you might still make it!”

They don’t hear me. Instead my father takes my mother’s face in his strong hands. “We knew this might happen, my love. You have to go on ahead now.”

“No!” She exclaims, clutching at his arms. “It’s not too late, if I use my powers…”

“You promised, Corinne.” He reminds her fiercely. “We decided, you and Selene have to make it, not me.”

“You decided!” My mother insists, “please don’t do this, please don’t make me go on without you.”

My father shakes his head, putting down his foot. “You have to run baby. I’ll buy you some time.”

“But my powers!” She tries again.

“If you use your powers it will only call more attention to you!” My father argues, setting his jaw and wearing precisely the same expression Bastien does when he’s made up his mind about something and refuses to budge. “Go Corinne, the Nova border isn’t far now. It will be all right.”

“It won’t!” She cries, tears running down her cheeks. “It will never be all right without you.”

I’m crying too now. I knew my parents got separated running from the Calypso pack, I knew my father died on the way, but I didn’t know he sacrificed himself this way. It’s a thousand times worse to watch it happen than it was to hear about it.

“It will.” He promises, his voice thick with emotion. “You’ll have Selene, I’ll live on through her. As long as you’re together, you will always have a piece of me with you.”

“Please James,” My mother begs, “Please come with me.”

“I’m sorry sweetheart.” He professes, his eyes shining with tears, “I so wanted to go on this adventure with you.” Kissing her deeply and hugging her one last time, he murmurs, “Take care of my mate, and tell our little girl how badly I wish I could have met her.”

“I promise.” She sobs. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” He smiles through his tears, drops a final kiss on her lips then turns and shifts into his wolf form, charging away down the mountain. My mother drops her own bag and turns to the north, shifting and tearing off through the trees with tears flying from her furry cheeks.

They sprint away in opposite directions, my father running to meet his death, my mother racing to save our lives. I always knew they loved each other, but now that I have a mate of my own I understand just how terrible their sacrifice truly was. I crumple to my knees in the snow, weeping as I watch their forms fade into the distance.

Suddenly the dream shifts, the snowy mountain blurs and the odd half lit world shifts to one of total darkness. My keen wolf eyes can see the huddled form of a young pup pressed against the rockface, and at first I think I’m seeing Lila, only this child is too old.

After a moment I realize I’m staring at myself, the little wolf who ran too deep into the mountain tunnels and became hopelessly lost. I was too young and weak then to try and fight for myself. I didn’t know I had any powers, or that my blood was special. I simply curled up in the darkness and cried, waiting to be rescued.

I remember all too well what comes next. After hours and hours alone in the horrible maze of rocky caves surrounding the city, my knight in shining armor appeared.

When I was five, teenage Bastien had looked like a god. Already tall and more muscular than most fully grown men, he strode through the darkness at a leisurely pace, demonstrating the lethal grace of the Apex predator he would one day become. His silver eyes glowed in the darkness, locking in instantly on the sniffling girl in the corner.

“Well hello there.” He greeted me warmly, careful not to come too close. “You look lost, little wolf.”

Hiccupping and nodding, I explain, “They were making fun of me, I ran in here to get away, but then I got all turned around.”

“Who was making fun of you?” He asked, sitting down beside me.

“The kids at school.” I share, swiping at my tear stained cheeks. “What are you doing down here?”

“Why I’m looking for you, of course.” Bastien answers smoothly, “and you shouldn’t listen to those other kids.”

“They called me a freak.” I murmur, “they said I must have been bewitched or deformed because my eyes are different colors.”

“Hmm.” Teenage Bastien hums thoughtfully, “let’s see.” If I thought the size difference between us as adults was laughable, the difference between his huge paw and my tiny chin in this memory is downright absurd. He tilts my chin up to study my wide, shining eyes, and his rugged features soften, “I think you have beautiful eyes.” Bastien states earnestly, “I’ll tell you what, if anyone ever tries to make fun of them again, you come tell me, and I’ll teach them a lesson.”

“Really?” I sniffle.

“Really.” He promises. “You can replace me at the pack house, come any time.”

“Thank you.” I whisper shyly.

“Of course.” He grins, “Now, do you want to hide here a wide longer, or would you like to go home?”

“I don’t know how to get out.” I confide, my lower lip quivering as a fresh wave of tears threatens.

“Then it’s a good thing you’re with me.” Bastien quips, rising to his feet. He bends down and gathers me up as if I weigh nothing. “Come on you, lets get you back to your mother. She’s been worried sick.”

I wrapped my arms and legs around him, cuddling close and letting him carry me out of the darkness. He was impossibly gentle, even for being a wild teenager. “Honestly.” He mused, hugging me to his chest, “how could anyone make fun of a sweet thing like you?”

“People are mean.” I pout.

“Not all people, little wolf.” He advises. “You just have to replace the right ones.”

I never forgot those words, and I never doubted for a single moment that in Bastien Durand, I’d already found the right person for me. That day began my lifelong love for the man- one I will carry on whether he comes home to me or not.

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