I wasn’t on shift at the diner the next day, and since I was still filled with tension from the feeling of being watched last night, I decided to lay low. Maybe try to fix some of the issues in the cabin.

Two hours later, with the door hanging at an even worse angle, the bathroom filled with even more muck and scum if possible, and the fridge emptier than ever, I called it quits and headed into town to grab enough food to get me through the rest of the week.

The full-moon-after-the-solstice was closing in, and I still hadn’t really come up with a plan. It was inevitable that I’d lose control of my wolf. She would take the lead as her first steps to freedom, and in doing so, I had no idea what path she’d choose. The cabin was deep in the forest, and logically, any animal should stay within nature, but knowing my luck, she’d head straight into Hood River to get her ass shot at by a paranoid human.

And of course, I had to survive the shift first.

Despite these worries, I still didn’t regret my rapid dash from Torma. My only regret was Simone. I missed her so much, and I would have hurt her by leaving like I did. The ache to talk to my best friend hit me all the time, but I knew that even one phone call might send my current life tumbling down around me. The pack was fully modernized now, and they knew how to track the same way a human would. I could leave no trace. My phone was on airplane mode, which helped me get through my already downloaded to be read pile, but it didn’t allow me any contact with shifters.

When I got in town, I went straight for the local store. It was half-filled, everyone looking a little frozen and miserable as they loaded their baskets. No one glanced my way, even though I was technically still new enough to create curiosity. My initial reticence had been enough to deter their questioning, and these days, I was usually able to shop in peace.

Today, I headed straight for the cold cuts section. My need for meat had increased over the past month, and while it was tough to try to afford the fresh cuts that my soon-to-emerge wolf craved, it was imperative that she wasn’t shifting hungry.

“I’m getting your protein,” I muttered to myself as she swirled in my chest, my stomach growling as we got closer. “Calm down.”

Of course, this did not calm the wolf soul down at all, and I wondered if I was going to replace myself with a beast who fought me during every change. I’d heard about shifters with that wildness in their wolves, and it was always a cautionary tale.

Praise the Shadow Beast, I legitimately did not need one more worry. My wolf would not be wild. Say it enough and it must be true.

When I was done loading the food staples for the week, I waited to check out, trying not to make eye contact with anyone. An uneasy chill traced down my spine a few times, and for a moment, I thought I caught sight of a familiar face, but when I looked again, it was just Tom, who worked for his father in the hardware store a few buildings over.

He smiled awkwardly at me when our eyes met, and I returned that smile. He was a nice-looking guy, not much older than me, with golden brown eyes and perfect teeth, but there was no way I could ever date a human. Even if they wouldn’t be freaked out of their fucking minds when I ate more than them, could bench six hundred pounds, and growled at random annoyances, I’d also live for many more years than they would.

And outliving someone you loved was my idea of torture.

“Sixty-eight dollars and twenty-two cents,” Claudia, the ancient lady behind the checkout, trilled. “And you’re looking a little peaky, dear. You should get some of the special chicken soup Earl made.”

Claudia was third generation born here—her family had migrated from Haiti many decades ago—and she knew absolutely everything about everyone… except me, of course. She spoke a million miles an hour, running her sentences together and meshing multiple thoughts in one, all the while grilling you for personal information. But there was no denying her husband Earl made a mean chicken soup.

“Sure,” I said with a nod, picking up one of the takeout containers. “How much extra?”

Claudia smiled, her pink lipstick smeared on her teeth, as always. “Free today, sweetheart. You need a little home cooking.”

“Thank you,” I said, dropping the correct cash into her hands and gathering up my couple of bags. “Have a nice afternoon.”

She smiled at me, her eyes shrewd as she examined me closer. “You too, dear. You too.”

Needing to get away from her prying eyes and the continuing uncomfortable sensation of being watched, I hurried out and didn’t look back. There was a decent chance my new paranoid personality was simply a side effect of my impending first shift—it was next to impossible to tell how each shifter would react coming up to their first shift. But there was always a plethora of personality changes in that time.

At least if I was feeling this way due to the shift, there was no stalker on my ass, and I could stop anticipating an ambush at any point. Would be nice to relax for a few days.

The wind picked up on the long walk home, and by the time I got back into the cabin, I was half-frozen. The thought of a fire to warm the room was enough to have me putting in the effort to light a decent one, and when it was roaring away, I even cooked my dinner over the flames.

Rare steak didn’t take long to perfect anyway, and I mostly enjoyed the added smoky flavor the fire produced. When I finally crawled into bed, after setting my alarm for an early start at the diner, I wondered if this was going to be my life forever. Alone. Books and fire and food my only comfort.

I mean, as fucked-up as it was, this was still better than being in Torma.

Just had to survive my first shift, because it’d be super shitty if I died before I ever even got to live.

I arrived early to work the next day after a shitty, restless sleep. Thanks to Ms. Wolf scraping at my skin like she was an actual physical animal trapped inside, and not just a sliver of my own soul.

“Lucy!”

Tessie Johanson hugged me as I walked through the door, and this time, I didn’t even flinch. Tessie was another full-time waitress, and she had flaming red hair, but unlike mine, hers wouldn’t be red for long. She changed her hair color as much as I changed my clothes, and I had no clue what her natural shade was.

She was also a hugger, and it had taken some getting used to, but now I kind of liked it.

“I’ve missed you this week,” she said, even though it had only been a couple of days since we’d been on shift together. “We’re supposed to be in for a busy day today with the festival in town.”

I smiled, stashing my bag and jacket in the small cubbies. “That’s fantastic. I could use a little extra cash.”

She smirked, following me as I got my apron out. “Hells yeah, me too. The purple I’m getting for my hair next is going to take three sessions with Mark. He’s the best, but dude costs bank.” Her lips twitched. “Are you sure you don’t want to get a trim? I can book us an appointment together.”

I snorted as we entered the main diner room to start our shifts. “I’ve told you, food before hair. I don’t have the money to waste, but I can’t wait to see the purple you choose.”

She sighed, wistfully staring at the long, braided mess down my back. “Your hair is the most amazing natural color I’ve ever seen. Mark would legitimately kill his mother for a chance to get his hands on it. He’d probably do it for free.” Her face lit up. “I’m going to ask him.”

Before I could protest, she had hurried off to her section, and I got to work on mine. As predicted, there was no lull all day, and I found out about the carnival and food festival that was moving through the town over the next week, bringing in a ton of visitors.

“You have to check it out!” an overly enthusiastic, ten-year-old boy told me. “They have rides and toys and cotton candy.”

I smiled at him while refilling his juice. “Sounds amazing. I’m working for the next few days, but maybe I’ll get a chance to sneak away.”

Greg, who was nearby chatting to one of the regulars, must have heard me. “Your friend from California was in here yesterday asking about you. Maybe you can take her there. It’s definitely one of the highlights of the holidays.”

Like someone had doused me in icy water, shock traced across my skin, freezing me in place. “My friend?” I managed to choke out.

He nodded, still looking affable, like he had no idea of the bombshell he’d just dropped on me. “Said she was in town to surprise you. Figured she made it out to your place last night.”

Somehow I didn’t drop the jug I held. Somehow I didn’t scream and sprint out of the room. Somehow I managed to calmly nod my head and walk away, into the back room.

“Everything okay?” Tessie asked, nudging the door open to drop off her armful of dirty plates.

Shaking off my panic, I forced a natural smile across my face, failing miserably, if her expression was anything to go by. “Just got some bad news. Could you maybe cover the rest of my shift? I need to head home quickly.”

Her sweet smile pulled at the corners as her face crinkled in concern. “Of course! Lord knows you’ve covered me plenty of times over the past few weeks.”

“You’re the best,” I blurted out in a rush, grabbing up my bag and jacket. “I’ll make it up to you.”

Total lie. This was the last time I’d see any of them.

I hadn’t been paranoid—my cover was blown. And after I grabbed my stash of cash from the cabin, I’d be out of here never to return. I was already cursing myself for being so stupid not to bring the money with me. It hadn’t felt safe wandering around with thousands of dollars, and I might pay the ultimate price for that stellar decision.

“Lucy,” Tessie called as I hurried out the door.

Forcing myself to slow, I turned my head back.

“Take care out there,” she murmured, and I found myself staring into her sad, grey eyes. It was almost as if she knew this was the last time we’d see each other, and as sadness welled up, I forced it down. I had no time to dwell on my losses.

The rest of today was about survival.

“You too,” I replied softly before I slipped out of the room and left the diner behind for good.

Unlike when I went into work, the carnival and food stalls were completely set up now, brightly colored tents visible as I dashed away. The streets were filled like I hadn’t seen here before, and it was clear this traveling event was a big deal. In some ways, it was a total blessing in disguise for me. The more people, the easier it would be to hide my escape from Hood River.

The crowds thinned as I got closer to my forest home, and when I was a mile or so out, I went into stealth mode, heading off the beaten path and into the dense foliage. A direct route was way too risky at this stage.

When the familiar surroundings of the cabin came into sight between a mass of old redwood trees, I slowed to a stop. Closing my eyes, I let my senses roam out as far as I could, searching for a disturbance to my area.

I stood there for at least ten minutes, not moving—barely breathing while not letting my guard down. Despite my lack of a completed bond with my wolf, by the time I was done, I could hear the rustling of birds from miles away, crickets and other insects nearby, and the creek that was across the way from the cabin.

My senses were stronger than ever, and I was almost certain no one lay in wait. At least not around my cabin.

I didn’t relax as I slowly crept forward, taking care to step silently—not exactly an easy task in a forest. But I was close enough to shifting to have the grace of a wolf at my disposal.

Avoiding the front door, I sidled along the west side of the cabin, toward the bedroom window. I might have been a dumbass in not keeping my cash on me, but I wasn’t completely without brains or logic. If anyone was lying in wait to ambush me, having successfully hidden themselves from my senses, they’d expect me to walk through the front door. I’d anticipated this from the start, and the bedroom window was my backup plan. It was always unlocked and well oiled, for a silent escape.

That part of my plan worked perfectly as the glass slid up silently, and I paused again, more cautious than I’d ever been in my life. The room was empty of scent and movement. No other heartbeats or feel of new energy. Lifting my leg over the windowsill, I entered with barely a sound… I was getting good at this stealth mission.

My bag remained packed at all times. It held cash, some clothing, plus food and water. In a heartbeat, I had it on my back and was slipping out the open window.

Fuck yes! I silently congratulated myself as I took off into the forest, sprinting with less worry about creating a noise. It appeared they hadn’t found my cabin yet, and maybe there was still a chance at escape.

Maybe that was the point I made my first mistake: having hope and letting my guard down. Thinking I was so clever, getting away with my cash and bag. Already planning where I’d go from here, never to see Hood River again.

But I wasn’t the only one racing through the forest today. Someone had been waiting for me, just not where I’d expected. The cabin was too obvious, and those bastards had lulled me into a false sense of security when there’d been no one inside.

But make no mistake, they had been waiting for me, and now I would be in a fight for my life.

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