Selling Myself To The Alpha
Chapter 63

Liana POV

I stare at the dead phone in my hand for a moment before I drop it and run to the bathroom when sour bile pushes up my throat. I reach the toilet just in time and tears stream over my face as I empty my stomach. "I'm getting your medication," Axel sounds worried as he looks at me.

"No!" I croak hastily and wipe over my face. This is so utterly humiliating but if he looks in my bag, he will see the prenatal vitamins and I am not ready to talk to him about that. Not before I have clarified my feelings regarding the pregnancy.

"I... it won't help ... right now," I stutter as I stand up. "It will only go out the way it went in. I must wait a moment."

"Are you sure?" He frowns and I nod feverishly before I rinse my face.

"I'm getting my toothbrush," I mumble sheepishly as I push past him to get to my bag.

An earthquake tearing the ground apart underneath me would not be the worst thing right now, I decide as Axel's gaze does not leave me when I gather my stuff to brush my teeth. I am embarrassed and feel like a weakling. He is a wolf, for crying out loud. Kicking a*s and taking names is his thing. Meanwhile, I fall apart after a mere phone call. It is no wonder I am deteriorating while carrying his baby. I am a feeble and puny human, and I am not worthy. Updated By Narugi.com

"I'm still not satisfied you're okay," Axel mumbles as I go back into the room. "I'm familiar with nerves and this isn't normal. This ..."

"I'm a human, Axel," the anxiety and self-doubt get to me, and I lose my temper. "A very boring human who used to have a boring life. The only anxiety I carried over the years is whether or not my mother is going to approve. Or what trouble Leon is going to get into next and how I will bail him out - yet again. I'm not used to people extorting me or threatening my friends. Dropping everything and fleeing to safety is new to me. It's not normal for me that people are trying to kill me. And speaking of killing. It's not normal to kill people when they piss you off. You might feel like you want to do it and you might say you're going to do it, but you don't. It's not normal."

"Liana, I..."

"No," I cut him off adamantly. I am on a roll and am not done. "I hate Angela, like really hate her. From the very first time I saw her. She's a heartless bitch with no regard for other people's feelings. And she did a terrible thing, which is punishable. But by a court of law, not by vengeance. As despicable as she is, she's still someone's daughter. Her parents could be the sweetest people on earth and her death will devastate them." Posted by Narugi.com; visit us for more free novels. "They're not," Axel grunts. "Believe me."

"That's not the point," I throw my hands up in the air. "Dead people don't have to deal with the consequences, the people staying behind do."

"She tried to kill you," Axel bellows. "How does that not infuriate you? How can you be on her side and show compassion?"

"Because I'm the person staying behind," I yell at the top of my lungs and his eyes widen when I start crying out of frustration and anger.

"I'm furious at her, Axel," I continue. "But I know how it feels to stay behind and deal with the consequences. Leon runs around wild and f***s up and I'm the one staying behind to clean up the mess. I'm the one planning and scheming to keep food on my family's table. And it's exhausting, Axel."

"Liana, I..."

"I don't want the responsibility," I sob and go sit on the bed. "I don't want to see the hurt and pain in her parents' eyes because they lost their child. I don't want other people to feel like this. If you kill Angela, her parents will hate you. And your parents will too, and I don't want that for you."

It is silent for a moment between us before he kneels in front of me and takes my hands in his.

"Wolves are creatures of nature," he says softly as he captures and holds my gaze. "In nature, it is live or die, Liana. She knew what she was doing, and she knows the punishment. If the roles were reversed, she would've expected me to kill you. That's our laws, our way of life."

"I

I get that," I sniff. "But you need to understand that this isn't my normal and it's making me sick."

"Okay," he sighs as he gets up and comes to sit next to me. He drapes his arm around my shoulders and I eagerly lean closer to him. "No more talking about killing people."

"Thank you," I mumble. "And no more fussing over me because I cannot handle the pressure."

"Fine," he snorts. "You can puke all you want, and I won't care."

"Good," I chuckle as I wipe away the last of my tears.

"But Liana," he pulls away and places a finger under my chin to lift my face. "You need to remember that I will kill for you."

"O... okay," I murmur as his green eyes pierce into mine. His words are both romantic and scary. I never had a person who is willing to kill for me and I never expected that this Adonis of a man would. But at the same time, the enormity of the moment is scaring the shit out of me.

The loaded atmosphere between us splinters when there is a knock on the door. With a sigh, Axel gets up to answer it.

"Your soup arrived," he announces as an Omega places a tray on the table in the corner and scurries away. "Do you think you can eat it?"

"I sure as hell am going to try," I smile wryly as I get up.

"Where's yours?" I frown as I look at the single bowl on the tray.

"Soup is for sick people," he snorts. "It's not a food group."

"Then where's your steak?" I mock and make my eyes big at him.

"At home," he grins as he takes a seat on the sofa next to me. "I must go back tonight."

"You're not staying?" I blow on the soup and avoid eye contact to conceal my disappointment.

"No, there are pressing matters at home," he smiles.

"Like Wilson," I nod in understanding and the delicious soup turns tasteless in my mouth. I do not know what Axel is hiding but I am sure Wilson's spies did something that has Axel on edge.

"Yes," he confirms. "I must brief Adele. She will pose as you tomorrow."

"What is going to happen to Wilson?" I ask softly.

"I bet you wanted to ask if I am going to kill him?" Axel raises his eyebrows at me, and I look away guilty.

"No, Liana," he sighs. "Contrary to what you're thinking, killing isn't a sport for me."

"That's not what I said or implied," I protest indignantly.

"I need him alive," Axel continues as if I have not said anything. "He has an illegal business and preys on the weak. This is bigger than Leon. It is about my pack's safety. Getting rid of Wilson's business is more important than getting rid of him." His words are like a punch in the gut.

"Wyatt," I mumble as I look at Axel. "I forgot about him. He is somehow involved."

"I won't kill him either, okay?" Axel's face is hard, and his eyes are cold. "Your ex-fiancé will live."

"Axel, you better get off this runaway horse before it throws you off," I warn him softly. "I haven't said a word about killing."

"No," he jumps up. "You only screamed at me five minutes ago about what a monster I am for wanting to."

"Get out of my room," my words are soft and calculated as I get up and go stand in front of him so our eyes can meet. "Now."

"No," he glares at me. "You can't expect me to simply be okay with what you've said."

"I told you how I feel," I hiss at him. "I didn't accuse you of anything or called you names. But don't worry, in the future, I will keep my feelings and opinions to myself."

Furiously and hurt, I turn around.

"We're still talking," he grabs my wrist, but I jerk free and take a step backwards.

"Well, then, go ahead and talk," I glare at him as I cross my arms in front of my chest.

"I am the Alpha," he says through clenched teeth. "I'm responsible for every pack member's safety. I'm not a raging lunatic on a killing spree, I'm protecting my people and certain crimes are punishable by death."

"Go ahead and kill them," I shrug. "I'm not stopping you."

"You just..."

"No," I cut him off, unable to control myself. "I shared my feelings, Axel. Don't confuse that with telling you what to do and how to do your job. I only remembered Wyatt has a little boy and for a moment I committed the ultimate sin to feel sorry for the child that will grow up without his father. But you can go now, I won't keep you any longer."

"You're right, I should go," he huffs as he walks away.

I close my eyes and take a deep breath. This day is a disaster.

"Axel, wait," I call him softly and he turns back to me.

We look at each other for a moment before I walk to him and put my arms around his waist. I press myself tightly against him and hold on until I feel his arms around me.

"Be safe," I murmur before I pull away.

He looks at me perplexed for a moment before he softly kisses me and walks to the door.

"One last thing," he says as he opens the door. "There are things much worse than dying. There is mercy in death. Remember that."