Lauren.

“It was Mandy from the finance office” Sheryl tells me.

After months of looking into who was stealing from the company we finally got a name. The womanwas so nice but now realizing that she was a wolf in sheep's clothing just pissed me off even more."Did she give a reason why she did it?" I ask through gritted teeth.

“No” she replies. “She only said that she was going to talk to you and you alone”

"Where is she currently?”

“She's being held at the police station, though they are saying that without enough evidence theywill have to release her"

At that I growl. “I thought we had enough evidence”

“The police say it's not enough to hold her”

I pick the vase near me and throw it against the wall. You can say that I am beyond pissed.

"Keep me updated...I'll let you know what moves to make next once I've figured things out” I tellher, trying to force myself to relax.

“You got it boss” she mumbles before hanging up.

I haven't been myself these past few months. I am irritable, angry and moody all the damn time. If Iam not pissed then I am sad. It was a rollercoaster of emotions.

I miss him so much but I know I have to get over him. By now he is probably mated to Mayra. Hehas probably forgotten I ever existed.

Goddess, why does it fucking hurt so much? This is worse than the time Darren betrayed me. Theconstant pain in my heart is a reminder that I fell for Sebastian and I fell hard. Why does thegoddess allow me to fall in love with men who aren't mine? Men who won't love me back?

I wanted him to choose me but I also knew I couldn't force him to give up his fated mate. Mayrawas made for him by the goddess. There was no way he would give that up easily.

Once again I am left alone. With a love I'm trying to bury and pain for company. Maybe it's time Igave up on love. So far I've gotten nothing from it except for heartache.

“Mommy, are you okay?" Krystal asks timidly.

I have to admit that I haven't been the best mother these past few weeks. Always withdrawing intomyself. Too lost to give her the attention she needs, but I am trying the best I can.

I should have left her with Darren's parents but I made a promise to her. That I would never leaveher again.

“Come here”

She comes immediately and sits on my lap.

“I'm just struggling with some things but I will be okay” I tell her as honestly as I can

She looks thoughtful for a while. “Did you and daddy Sebastian have a fight? Is that why we left?”Fuck! Why are kids so intuitive?

"Yes, something like that”

“It's okay mommy. I understand, Jax and I sometimes fight but we make up...I'm sure you and daddySebastian can do the same if you both apologize to each other. I miss them so much and I also wantto see daddy and grandma and grandpa...Also Aunt Claire and Lilly... Oh and Mason”

Gosh. I feel so fucking selfish now. She hasn't complained but I didn't take into account what takingher from the people she knows and loves will do.

I see the longing in her eyes but I also know she won't voice her wants.

“Okay Krys...I'll apologize to him then we'll see what will happen next” I lie.

There was no way I was going to face Sebastian. Let alone apologize.

"Yeey... Does that mean I can tell Jax we are having a sibling?” she asks with a big smile on her face.I look at her in confusion. “What are you talking about...what sibling?”

Could it be that Mayra and Sebastian were already expecting their first child?

The pain that tears me when I think of them being intimate almost brings me to my knees

“The one in your tummy mommy..." she replies, making me freeze.

She adds something but my mind is completely detached from the conversation.

Shit! Shit! I keep repeating in my mind. I numbly take out my phone and open my menses trackingapp. I scroll through it almost blindly. Trying to see when I last had my period.

Fucking shit! My panic starts rising when I see that I had my last period two months ago. If Krystalwas right. Then it meant I was already pregnant when we rescued Mayra and the rest. So if she wasright, that would put me at around three or four months pregnant.

My whole body goes numb and my lungs feel constricted.

“Mommy, are you listening?” Krystal's voice penetrates the fog.

I turn to look at her. “Please go and play or watch TV okay? There's something I need to do”

She must have sensed something in my voice because she nods and walks into her room. Shuttingthe door softly behind her.

I immediately dial her phone number. “Mom” I whisper, tears choking me.

“What is it honey? Are you okay? Did something happen?” she fires the questions.

When I left Sebastian I came here. I made Luke and my parents promise not to tell Sebastian where Iwas or I would leave and they would never hear from me until I was ready to come home.

They agreed and they kept my secret. I couldn't stay in the pack so my mother gave me the cottageshe hid in after she woke up in the mortuary.

This is where I have been the entire time. It's well hidden and not that far from the pack. Mom, dadand Luke come to visit us every day. While my grandparents come weekly.

“No, it's not that...Can you get me a pregnancy test ?” I ask in a small voice.

She doesn’t even ask just answers. “On it...I'll be there in thirty”

We hang up and I wait. The anxiety and nervousness wreaking havoc inside me. Gosh how could wehave been so careless? We never used protection. Maybe he assumed I was on the pill, and I wasjust too aroused most of the time to care.

I don't know how long I stay there staring at the wall but then I hear the sound of keys on the lock.My mother, as beautiful as ever, walks in carrying a small shopping bag.

“I didn’t know which one to get so I just got one of each brand” she says sitting down next to me.“Thank you mom" I tell her, laying my head on her shoulders.

“When did you realize you might be pregnant?”

I sigh. “A few minutes ago... didn't even think I was until Krystal mentioned something about tellingJax they're going to have a sibling. I think the goddess may have revealed it to her in one of hervisions”

Mom nods her head in understanding. “I want to ask you what you are going to do but let's firstconfirm it, okay?”

“Okay” she hands me the bag and I take it then head to the bathroom.

Five minutes later I'm done and I am waiting impatiently to see the results. The next five minuteswait feels like a millennium. I take a deep breath before checking.

I had hoped but damn it. This can't be happening. Not now when everything in my life is a mess andSebastian has another mate.

I get out of the bathroom, feeling lost.

"Well?" mom asks.

The tears I've been holding back now fall. I'm unable to control them. Mom immediately gets upand pulls me into her arms.

"Every last one of them is positive” I cry

I was pregnant with Sebastian's child. How was I going to cope with having a reminder of him everyday? How was I going to survive seeing him every time he came for visitations? Knowing well I can'thave him. That he'll never be mine. How will I handle knowing after every visitation he goes back toMayra? his fated mate.

“It's okay darling, let it all out” she tells me and I do

I let it all out and cry until there are no more tears left to cry. After that I wipe my tears and face mymother.

"What are you going to do now?” mom asks.

I sigh tiredly. “I have to go back”

Despite everything that has happened Sebastian deserves to know I am pregnant. He deserves to bepart of his child's life from the start. He wasn't going to replace out he had a child years later. No. Thatwould be cruel.

I'll just have to set my feelings aside and think about the baby. I healed once and I'm sure I can do itagain.

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