The Alpha Wants Everything Book 1 The King's Queen
Chapter 21: Let me help you!

Dax woke in a cold sweat on the floor of the office. She tried to sit up but her body groaned against her movement, like the beating she took in her dream was real and not just a memory of the past. She fought against the tears that threaten to slip, how could so much pain, so much suffering be inflicted on one person? How did her being alive make someone so angry? She sat on the floor, controlling her breathing, controlling her heart, quieting her mind, the voices, the demons. He’s locked up, he can’t hurt me, he can’t replace me. He can’t hurt me, he can’t replace me! She repeated this over and over forcing herself to believe it. With that she pulled herself from the floor and looked at her phone, 4:30 am. She dragged her sore body upstairs and into her bathroom. She started the shower and waited for the water to warm up. When she stepped in, the warm water eased her muscles but did nothing to relax her mind. She got cleaned up, but let the water run down her body just a little longer before she shut the shower off and stepped out. Wrapping a fluffy towel around her body she dried her hair. She looked at herself in the mirror, a broken shell stared back at her, she had been ripped apart and shattered into so many pieces, too many times to count, and though she tried to piece herself together, the pieces weren’t fitting properly. With each memory, the puzzle would shatter all over again and she would have to start over. She couldn’t even see the picture. How do you put together a puzzle when you can’t see the picture?

It was 4:30 in the morning when pain shot through Kane’s chest as he bolted out of bed and fell to the floor, breathing hard, he rubbed his chest where he felt the pain and waited for it to subside. Trying to control his mind, his breathing, his heart. What the fuck was that? She needs us! NOW! Kane was on his feet and running, he was barely out the front door when he shifted to his wolf form, he would get there faster than driving. Grabbing a pair of basketball shorts with his teeth from behind a tree he ran as fast as he could to Dax. How did she do that? She pulled him into her nightmare, but how? The bond between them was just starting to strengthen, he hadn’t even marked her. But he felt everything she felt, he could still feel it. The overwhelming despair that covered him like a blanket, the hollow, empty feeling inside.

Coming out of her bedroom dressed in her favourite long sleeved shirt, she heard an intense pounding on the door to the warehouse. Who the hell would be here at this time in the morning? She stood outside her loft fear plaguing her, what if….then she heard Kane’s voice calling her name. She ran down the stairs and opened the door, he looked disheveled standing there in just a pair of basketball shorts, fear reigning in his eyes. When he saw her, he wrapped his arms around her pulling her into his embrace. She could hear his heart beat wildly in his chest, feel his chest rise and fall with each heavy breath he took.

“Are you ok?” He asked,

“I’m….fine” she lied, she still felt the effects of her nightmare.

“Don’t lie to me, I felt it, I can still feel it. I was there” she tried to get out of his embrace but he held her tighter

“What are you talking about?” He knew, she didn’t know how he knew but he knew.

“Your dream, I was there, I don’t know how, but I was there, I saw what he did” she tensed immediately but her body betrayed her and she began to tremble.

“It was nothing” she whispered, trying to be strong, trying not to let it show.

“Don’t tell me it was nothing when it didn’t feel like nothing” she tried again to get away from him, she pushed him he just held her tighter to him.

“Don’t push me away, don’t shut me out Dax, let me help you” he pleaded with her,

“You can’t help me, no one can” she held back a sob as she pushed him harder, managing to get out of his embrace.

“No one can help you cause you’re too busy living in fear. You keep pushing everyone out,” anger eminent in his voice “Just let me in”

“NO!” She yelled at him.

“WHY?” He yelled back. She stepped away from him, from the anger in his tone and fought to curb the shiver that wanted to rip through her body. Seeing her reaction to his anger he fought to control himself and what he was feeling.

“Why?” He asked again using a little less force.

“If you knew….if you knew what he did, you would never look at me the same” she cried, tears freely falling down her cheeks.

“What did he do?” His voice softened.

“He...broke...me” she crumpled to the floor and broke down, he watched in sadness as huge sobs raked through her, but unlike the dream he was not rooted in place, rushing to her side and holding her into him. He held her while her body shook, her cries ringing through the early morning.

For what seemed like an eternity, Kane sat on the hard floor of the warehouse holding her, rubbing her back, letting her know that he was there, that he wasn’t going anywhere. With the last of her cries hanging in the air, he asked again.

“Can you tell me what he did?” She shook her head and shivered.

“Please, Dax let me in” he whispered into her hair.

“You won’t want me anymore” her voice shook when she whispered back.

“I could never not want you, tell me, please” he held her tighter.

“I can’t tell you, you would have to see, but...I...I can’t let them out” Though she choked back a sob, he could feel her tears falling again. He lifted her chin so she was looking at him.

“Show me, I need to see” she shook her head and tried to pull away but he wouldn’t let her.

“Please, let me in, let me help you” she bit her lip, she didn’t want to open the door, but she knew he needed to see. He needed to see just how damaged she really was so he could save himself. He deserves someone better, not someone running from a nightmare trapped in her head. She could push herself one more time, to save him she would push herself over the edge.

On shaky legs she stood up, and walked towards a closed door. Stopping in front of it she swallowed hard. He could see the pain on her face and fear rolled off of her. She placed her hand on the door but pulled it back like it burned her.

“Do you hear them?” She asked not once taking her eyes off the door “The demons” No he couldn’t, he could feel something powerful behind that door, but she could hear them, they were loud, screaming everything that was ever said to her, causing her pain. Wrapping her arms around herself, with her fingers tracing the scar on her ear she took steps back and away from the door. She was weak, she couldn’t open the door, she wasn’t brave enough to face them. She couldn’t let them out.

“Please! Please don’t let them out!” She begged him.

He looked at her, his heart breaking when he saw her, trembling and afraid. She was asking him not to open the door, but he had to see. How could he help her if he didn’t know what he was up against? Taking a deep breath he twisted the handle, the door popped open. The light flickered on automatically and all at once it hit him full force. Like a wrecking ball smashing into him the feeling in that room was overwhelming. Pain, revulsion, anger, all washed over him, flooded into him, he felt like he was suffocating, choking on despair, while crippling fear drove into his heart. There were so many sculptures, paintings, drawings everywhere, each with its own life force, its own story of creation, its own reason for being. People had demons, but Dax gave hers a form. He looked back at her, she was huddled in a crumpled ball on the floor, her hands covering her ears, as unseen demons attacked her. He knew there was physical abuse, bones could be fixed and wounds would heal, but this much emotion left scars and those scars ran deep.

Twisted metal sculptures, depicting pain, sadness. Paintings with brush strokes of anger and rage. Pencil drawings of despair and neglect. Then in the center of the room was a ceramic figure, the only one that had a face that had features. A young girl shattered hope in her eyes as she lay crumpled on the floor with lash marks across her back. It screamed rejection, it was also the only one with a date Aug 27 2013. The girl from the dream.

Dax sat just outside the doorway, she wouldn’t come into the room, she was staring at the figure but she could see the turmoil on Kane’s face.

“I-I-I had just turned 14” she began. “I had found the woman who gave birth to me, and I went to go see her. I had hoped she would be excited and would accept me. Pretty stupid right”

“You had hope,” he said, looking at her. Her body trembled and she swallowed hard. Reliving the day over and over in her head. The words that were spoken to her, running on a loop in her head. Unrelenting causing anguish and despair.

“That was the day it shattered, she took one look at me and knew who I was, and instead of acc...accepting me, sh...she t...told me that I was going to wre...wreck eve….everything by being there” she choked out, her fingers curled around the door frame her eyes never leaving the figure.

“I di...didn’t want you then, w...what makes you th...think I...I...w...want you now? Who would ever want a fr...freak like you?” It was then that she looked away as pain shot across her face. A growl deep and loud ripped through Kane before he could even stop it, he was across the room and he gathered her in his arms and held her close to him.

“I do. I want you. Always and forever” he whispered into her ear. He slammed the door closed and carried her upstairs to her loft, to her room, to safety. He would protect her, no one would ever hurt her like that again. That is a promise! Ky snarled.

Kane made Dax take the day off, and he even kicked Georgie home, lying saying Dax was sick and there was no point in her being there. Her nonchalant attitude made Kane want to strangle her. She would need to go when Kane took control of the warehouse. He had no idea why Dax even hired her, she was utterly fucking useless. He would replace her someone better. Fuck a trash can is better! Ky huffed. At least it was dependable. He sat at the desk and pulled up her calendar to see if she had any appointments or meetings today, they would need to be cancelled. He would also have to get to Glenda’s at some point to get food, though he doubted she would eat anything. After reliving all that pain earlier, her eyes were haunted by ghosts of the past. It took him a bit of convincing but he managed to get her to sleep off and on. She would wake up as soon as he was about to leave the bed afraid he might not come back, though it seemed like a part of her expected him to do just that. She was asleep now, but he didn’t know how long she would stay that way, so he had to move fast. He opened the door and now her demons had control, he might have pushed her too hard, too far and too fast. He needs to die…..painfully! Ky sneered. And he will, very, very painfully! I want to rip him to pieces while he is still breathing! Ky howled. He demanded vengeance for his mate.

Staring at her computer and calendar, he started making calls, her customers were sympathetic and said they all understood and to have her call when she was feeling better. Now that’s a question, when will she be feeling better? He would do everything in his power to help her recover from this. She is no longer alone! Ky stated. No she was not. He made it very clear to her that she was no longer alone, and he would never leave her. She is our little mouse! Yes she is, and we protect what’s ours! Yes we do! He heard a noise at the door to the office and when he looked up she was standing there. A look of panic on her face. Fuck! He was gone longer than he wanted to be.

“I was just canceling your appointments for the day” she looked tired and drained. Holding his arms open for her, she crawled into his lap and hid her face in his neck, he wrapped his arms around her and held her to him

“I wouldn’t have blamed you if you left.” She whispered it was barely audible but he heard it.

“I would never leave you, little mouse” He kissed the top of her head and started rubbing small circles up and down her back and he could feel her relaxing into him, she was exhausted he scooped her up and brought her upstairs to her room. They laid down on her bed and he held her till he could hear her soft rhythmic breathing. Before leaving the bed, he made sure she was asleep. Her soft features were calm and still, he brushed the hair from her face, so small, so innocent. Looking at her like this no one would ever know, the pain she went through. It killed him to leave her side, but he had to call Johnny.

Back down on the warehouse floor, he called Johnny from the office phone so he would not wake her. Downside of being a werewolf, there were no pockets to put a phone in when you shifted.

“Hello?” Came a confused voice on the other end

“Johnny!”

“Kane! What the fuck man? You ran out of here this morning like something bit your ass” Johnny asked, concerned.

“I’m at the warehouse”

“Oh, early morning booty call, I get it,” Johnny laughed into the phone.

“JOHNNY!” Kane boomed.

“OW! WHAT?” Johnny yelled back.

“I have not the time or the patience for this,” Kane growled at him.

“Clearly! What made you so grumpy?”

“She pulled me into a dream last night, and before you start not that kind of dream” Kane started.

“Then what kind of dream?” Johnny asked curiously, but Kane caught the note of humour in his tone.

“A dingy little house, where I watched a man beat her almost to death, kind of dream” Kane replied, he heard a deep breath and then a low growl on the other end of the phone.

“What?” The humour had left his voice, it was deep and angry when he finally said something. As soon as Johnny found out Dax was Kane’s mate, she became his Luna immediately. No one hurts his Luna.

“Johnny I felt everything she did. Pain, fear, I felt it all, I don’t know how, but I did. It wasn’t a dream to her Johnny, it was a memory that I saw unfold in front of me. I had no control, I couldn’t stop it. She has a room in the back of the warehouse, it is full of...of...her demons” Kane growled clutching the phone.

“Are you sure Ky didn’t mark her?” Johnny asked, he knew being marked allowed mated wolves to read each other’s feelings, but he never heard of being able to pull someone into a dream or a memory before,

“I am sure, I checked” he breathed deep trying to control his temper. His grip on the phone was tightening and he could feel the flimsy plastic beginning to protest.

“I will look into it. There has to be something that could explain it. Anything else?” Johnny asked.

“I need...shoes...and...pants...and...a shirt” he knew he would hear about this so he waited for it to come. The phone was silent for what seemed like forever then a roar of laughter erupted from the other line.

“Don’t tell me you are standing there naked brother” Johnny choked out.

“No, I am standing in the warehouse in a pair of basketball shorts,” Kane responded. He could see the humour in it and he tried to hide the smile but it was no use, Johnny’s laughing at his predicament caused him to laugh as well.

“Oh brother, how do you continually replace yourself in these situations?” Johnny said his laughter subsided.

“She stands under 5 feet, has hair as white as snow, cerulean blue eyes with amethyst starbursts, and I would walk to the ends of the earth barefoot through hot coals if she asked me too. That is how I end up in these situations” Kane replied smiling.

“Uh huh! See you in a bit...with your pants” Johnny laughed and hung up the phone.

He was about to shut her system down when he noticed a folder marked expenses. He knew he shouldn’t but he opened it anyway. She was very neat and organized. She documented everything that came into the warehouse and everything that went out. Between the rent, bills, taxes, supply costs, and other expenses she was barely breaking even every month. How could that be? She always seemed busy with work. Constantly had new customers. He looked at the amounts she was paying for bills and taxes and they seemed to even out, then he looked how much she was paying for rent in the building. That son of a bitch Peter was charging almost double what she should be paying. He checked back a few months, the more she brought in the more he charged her. Add him to the list! Ky hissed. Kane let out a guttural growl, this bullshit was going to stop today.

Kane went back upstairs to check on his mate, she was where he left her sleeping in the bed. He walked into the kitchen and searched for something to eat, he was beginning to get hungry. He opened cupboards and her fridge and he found nothing. They were all empty, Johnny better get here quick, he was tired, stressed and hungry. He contemplated going to the woods behind the warehouse to hunt himself a snack, but that could take awhile and if she woke up without him she would panic again. Plus it would raise questions if he was caught brushing the blood from his teeth. With a deep sigh he rolled his shoulders and he went and crawled back into bed and pulled her close to him. He closed his eyes with visions of demons dancing around his head.

“KANE WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?” Johnny bellowed from the warehouse floor, Kane opened his eyes and blinked a few times he checked the clock. A few hours had passed since he called Johnny, what the hell took him so long? Dax was still sleeping tucked into his side, as quietly as he could he got out of the bed and gave her a kiss on the forehead. She grumbled something and swatted at him moving into the warm vacant spot he created, this caused him to smile. He met Johnny at the bottom of the stairs, and Goddess, love that boy he brought food. Kane was fucking starving.

“Figured you could use more than pants, in case you got any ideas about eating her” as Johnny watched Kane tear into one of the burgers, Kane just nodded.

“Thought about going hunting” he said around a mouthful

“Slow down, or you’ll choke,” Johnny laughed.

“I’m fucking starving” Kane had the burger done in three bites.

“Doesn’t mean you need to eat like a savage,” Johnny scolded him.

“I am a savage or did you forget” smiling at the word.

“How is she?” The concern in Johnny’s voice brought Kane’s attention away from the food.

“I lived one night in a nightmare that left me shaken, she lives every night in a dark memory, one of many. How do you think she is? I’ve heard her make comments about demons before, but...I never thought they were real.” Kane replied.

“How much did you replace out?” Johnny pushed.

“Enough to imagine 27 different ways to end Carl’s life as painfully as possible, she might have made this a business” he motioned his arms around them, then he pointed to a door at the back “But he made it her prison” Johnny started to move towards the door.

“You don’t want to open that door” Kane warned him, his own eyes showing ghosts of what lies behind it, now he was curious what would cause his friend, the most revered Alpha to warn him against a door.

Johnny stopped in front of it. He could feel a deep dark energy coming off of it, it danced around him, his skin paled and he had an overwhelming feeling of dread course through him. His body grew cold, his breath quickened and his heart raced and beat loudly. He started to shake and his wolf Diego whimpered. He backed away from the door quickly and came to stand beside Kane again trying to shake the feeling from him.

“What the fuck was that?” Johnny asked, trying to control his breathing and slow his heartbeat. “I don’t like that door, can we burn what’s in it?”

“Unless we can burn what’s in her head, burning the contents of that room is futile.” Kane looked at his friend.

“What do you want to do?” Johnny asked, as he glared at the door. Kane thought for a minute before he said,

“I want to go see Alpha Peter. I may not be able to deal with her demons right now, but I can make it easier for her to live today.” Johnny gave him a questioning look, Kane just grabbed the bag of food, his clothes and headed back upstairs telling him to wait there.