The Alpha's Mutt -
Building Bridges
After mulling over the problem for a while. I finally decided that the best place to start with the vampire was to get to know him. I had to introduce myself as a friendly character rather than his interrogator as I had been the last time. I had no idea if he would be receptive to my attempts. I had probably already sullied myself in his eyes, but I supposed that I had to try.
So, I started by going to his cell and dismissing the guard, taking over the duties for a while. I would sit in a chair just outside of his reach and began attempting to make small talk with him. It was awkward at first and, as I had feared, he did not seem interested in interacting with me. So much of the time, I spent talking to myself.
Finally, on my eighth day visiting him in row, things changed. I had been rambling on about how my pack was attempting to make a larger vegetable garden on the territory near where we had set up camp. The vegetable patch that the Elwood Pack had was not sufficient now that both packs were staying in the area. Hugo, as I was now careful to refer to him, seemed oddly interested in my monologue, even though it was far from an interesting topic. When finally, after hours of one-sided conversation, he spoke…
“Why do you keep coming here?” He questioned, a skeptical look in his eyes. “Why are you trying to talk to me?”
“Because I want to.” I confirmed with a shrug.
“Why?” He pressed, his eyes narrowing further.
“Because I think that we may have misjudged you when you arrived here and that led us to giving you a bad first impression as well. I do not believe that you are really our enemy even though you try to present yourself as such.”
“Did your witch tell you that.” He hissed, defensively, obviously referring to Relic’s probing of his mind.
“Maybe.” I answered, giving nothing specific away. “But I had already suspected it. Why do you think that I made certain that you have been treated well during your time here. My hope is that we can release you when this whole mess is over. However, I can only do that, if I am certain that you will no longer be a threat to the wolves when all is said and done.”
“Do you really expect me to believe that?” He responded, sarcastically rolling eyes.
“Believe me or don’t, it is your life, not mine. But I would like you to consider that I have not lied to you yet. No one has harmed you since you gave us the information that we asked you for and I have gone out of my way to ensure that you are as comfortable as possible given the circumstances. I have no desire to see you killed. I do not believe that you are amongst those who deserve it.”
He grew quiet after that, turning on his bed so that he was no longer facing me. I felt that I was getting to him. I sensed that this was my opportunity to get him thinking about who he really was inside and if he was really prepared to give his life for a cause that he did not believe in. So, I pushed him further…
“How many wolves did you kill at Bristlecone?” I asked, leaning closer to the bars that lined his cell. “How many wolves have you killed over all?”
He still refused to answer or even look at me. So, I continued…
“See...I don’t believe that you have killed any wolves.” I admitted with a tsk of my tongue. “I do not believe that you have killed anyone at all. As a matter of fact, I think that you were sent to that battlefield at Bristlecone, and you were completely unprepared for what it meant to take a life. You have been taught to hate the wolves, but when the time came to act on that hate, I think you hesitated. I think that is how you ended up so badly injured that day. You were hurt and you hid. That is why you did not die and that is how you prevented yourself from being forced to kill.”
The room remained silent, and I was not sure if my words were having any effect. That was until I heard a light sniffle. Was Hugo...crying?
“You’re wrong…” Hugo whimpered, quietly, his voice barely above a whisper.
If I had not had the enhanced hearing of a wolf, I likely would not have heard him he spoke so quietly.
“What was that?” I asked, encouraging him to continue speaking.
I was getting through to him and I did not want that momentum to stop now.
“You are wrong. I have killed a wolf.” He stated.
And I had to swallow back the lump in my throat. But I noted that there was no malice in his voice, instead it sounded as though he were plagued with guilt. So, I controlled my own emotions and let him tell me his story.
“I did hesitate when we arrived at Bristlecone, so I stayed to the back. When we encountered the pack, they were so weak, so sickly. I felt a gnawing feeling begin in my stomach. Suddenly, none of this seemed right anymore. I had turned around; I was going to retreat to the trees and try to hide until the whole thing was over. But…” He paused, taking in a deep breath and releasing it slowly, his voice shaky as he continued. “I ran straight into the path of one of the wolves. He was quite ill, and he struggled in his movements, but he was still hellbent on attacking me. I did not know what to do, so I fought back. During the struggle, my knife wound up in his chest. He was so weak…even though I am not trained to fight…he never stood a real chance. It wasn’t fair. None of it was fair.”
Without warning, a loud sob suddenly escaped his throat, echoing off the concrete walls.
“I had never killed anyone before.” He cried. “Yes, I have taken blood but most of my donors were willing and those that weren’t were always left relatively unharmed in the end. I had never believed myself a monster, despite all the stories that the humans tell about our kind. I did not believe that I was a bad person. But in that moment…when I watched the life fading from that poor wolf’s eyes…I felt like a monster.”
I was stunned at his admission. Now it was my turn to sit quietly as I absorbed everything that he had just told me. Relic was right. This was no hateful, blood-lusted vamp. This was a young man who had clearly gotten in over his head and did not know how to get out. He did not need to be punished. He needed help.
“My whole body went into shock after the murder.” He continued, his voice steadying some, though the tears carried on falling from his eyes, blood-tinted water staining his face. “That was when your warrior came up behind me and attacked. I did not even try to fight back. I couldn’t.” He sighed, resigned to his fate.
My heart went out to him after his story. He seemed sincere with his feelings. And I knew from experience that taking a life was no easy thing. It stayed with you a way that nothing else would. Like a little piece of their soul would now forever stain your own.
“And now I sit here in the silence, replaying that moment over and over in my mind, feeling more guilty each time.” He went on rambling, finally releasing the feelings that had been eating away at him since his arrival. “I did not know that wolf.I had no issue with him. He had done nothing to me or anyone that I love. He did not deserve his fate.”
“No, he didn’t.” I agreed.
I knew that he was already upset but lying to him was not going to ease his pain. He had to be honest with himself. We both did.
“All can happen now is for you to do your best to move forward and learn from your mistake. Do what you can to make up for what you have done and make sure to never repeat it again. It does not have to define you. But allow it to guide you towards a better life. You will replace that you will eventually heal with time.”
“I just don’t even know where to begin…” He huffed.
“I would suggest that you start by letting go of your hate for the wolves.” I offered. “Forget what you think you know about us and learn the truth, then allow yourself to draw your own conclusion. Do not follow another’s blind hatred.”
“Do you really think that will help?”
“It won’t fix everything right away, but it is a step towards making amends, which may help you to feel better as well.”
“Why are you still being so nice to me even after I admitted to killing a wolf?” He questioned, this time seeming more curious than skeptical.
“Because I do not believe that you did it because you wanted to.” I explained. “There is a difference between doing something out of malicious intent and doing it because you had little choice. Am I happy that you have taken the life of a wolf? Absolutely not. And if you do it again, unless your life is under immediate threat, then I will not hesitate to make certain that you pay for your crime. But this particular crime, I do not believe is yours. In my opinion, the fault lies with your leader, Master Belial.”
And just like that a bridge was built.
He scrutinized me for a moment, processing my words and assessing whether or not I meant what I said. And the truth was that I did mean it. Hugo had made mistakes, we all do. But should those mistakes define who he is? Or should those who are truly responsible be the ones to pay? I should think the latter. We can blame the sheep for following. Or we can blame the shepherd for leading them there in the first place.
I am not saying that Hugo does not need to take some responsibility. Of course, he does. But if he is willing to own up to his actions. If he is willing to admit to his wrongs. Then he can begin the necessary steps to course correct. He still has the opportunity to make something better of his life. He just needs someone to give him that chance.
Now that the bridge was built. We were just going to have to cross it. One step at a time.
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