The Beta's Daughter
FIVE | WHITE

It's a rogue, I mindlinked to Rosa. I held my ground, feeling my wolf urging me to shift. Get in thetruck quickly.

I couldn't hold it back any longer. I let my wolf come forward and I shifted, feeling my face elongateinto a snout and my legs shoot backwards, lengthening and widening. My hands and feet becamepaws, and my whole body sprouted fur. I growled, keeping my eyes on the rogue.

It seemed startled and took a timid step backwards. I immediately filled the space, looking down atit.

It was smaller than me, with mousy brown-grey fur that looked tattered, covered in bite and clawmarks. It's eyes seemed to harden, and it howled loudly, the sound being drawn up into the night.It pounced. Suddenly I felt the lash of its claws against my neck, scraping down towards my chest. Igrowled in fury, ignoring the pain as I jumped at it.

I latched my jaws around it's leg, and heard a satisfying snap as I incapacitated it. It hobbled back,circling me. I attacked again, swiping out with my claws towards it's eyes.

I scratched through one, and it shut it, the cut weeping. I stalked forwards once more as it began toretreat, and it quickly sunk it's teeth into my leg. I howled miserably.

Suddenly, a creamy coloured wolf leapt from behind me and charged. The rogue backed up anddisappeared into the bushes, taken by the darkness once more.

I shifted back, feeling tears pricking at my eyes. My throat, chest, and arm throbbed; I could feel mypulse pounding as blood left my body.

With my eyes half-closed, I felt Rosa shift back and grab me around my waist. She half-carried andhalf-dragged me to my car, and then yanked her jumper off over her head and pressed it to myarm. I held a feeble hand up to my neck, trying to hold as much of my blood in my body as I could.She saw what I was doing and quickly pulled my sweatshirt off, spinning it around itself so that itbecame one long, thick line that she could use as a bandage. She wrapped it around my neck sotight that I felt as though I couldn't breath, and I clawed at it, my eyes struggling to meet hers.

“I'm sorry, Ari,” she breathed heavily. “It's got to be tight. You have to stay awake for me, okay? Ineed you to help me replace the way home.”

Together we pushed my aching body into the passenger's seat, and she clambered in behind thesteering wheel. She turned the key and pulled out onto the track slowly, as though afraid of shakingme.

"You have to tell me the way, Ari.” I nodded.

Black spots pulsed behind my eyelids, blocking out large portions of my vision. Each time we cameto a turning I struggled to remember the way, but I managed to croak out left, right, or straighteach time.

When we got closer to the reserve Rosa seemed to know the way, and I let my eyelids droop. Sheshook me from time to time to check I was still awake, and I'd peel my eyes open blearily for asecond to reassure her. I just wanted to sleep.

After what felt like an eternity we pulled into the reserve. Rosa ran round to my side and opened thedoor, and dragged me out of the truck. I let my head loll on her shoulder as we walked slowlytogether.

I assumed she was taking me to the pack hospital, but I wasn't aware enough to watch where wewere going.

I stumbled and fell, feeling the cool evening grass press against the bare skin of my arms, legs, andcheek. The black spots surrounded me, and I surrendered myself to them gratefully.

I awoke to the sound of hushed chatter, and the feeling of a warm hand wrapped around mine. Iblinked my eyes open slowly, expecting the burst of bright light that assaulted them. I squinted,trying to see who was sat next to me.

"She's awake!” Jacob said. I relaxed, and gave his hand a feeble squeeze. I pulled myself up into asitting position, letting my body flop against his.

My parents were stood beside him, their faces worried as they checked me over. I felt at my arm andneck, touching thick bandages there.

"Hey, sweetie. You scared us,” my mum said, her voice wobbly. She smiled at me though, and Ismiled back.

“Sorry,” I croaked, shocked by the sound of my own voice. I coughed, and then tried to speak again.“Where's Rosa?”

“She had to leave, sweetheart,” my dad cooed softly. “Her family were worried about her. Whathappened?” He took a seat on the bed, and I frowned.

“We drove to a nice spot, just up the hill from the res. I wanted to show her my truck,” I smiledweakly. “We were just chatting when we heard something. It was a rogue. I went to investigate, and,well.” I gestured at my bandages.

I shut my eyes briefly, wanting to enjoy the comforting warmth of Jacob's side against mine. Hebrought his hand up to my cheek, and I leant into it, soothed.

"A rogue? So close to the res?” My dad asked, his eyes flashing angrily.

"We were quite far up,” I admitted quietly. My dad sighed. “I mean — I wasn't expecting to see anyrogues there. It wasn't that far.”

“Too close for comfort,” my mum said, the usual melodic softness gone from her voice. Her eyeswere steely. “We must keep an eye on this. It isn’t the first time a rogue has been sighted near thepack lands.”

I nodded. There were no patterns to the sightings, but I knew Alpha Kele was becoming concerned.“I can tell you exactly where it was, or take you there, if it helps.”

My dad nodded slowly, deep in thought. “If you can show us on a map we can plot it alongside theothers. I'll talk to Kele.” He stood abruptly, but then looked down at me, his eyes soft. “How are youfeeling?”

“Better. I'll be fine, dad. Go.” I smiled. He nodded, leaning down to press a quick kiss to the top ofmy head. My mum took his place on the bed after he'd left.

“Rosa isn't hurt, is she?” I asked, my voice quivering. I knew she'd leapt at the rogue, and I didn'tthink she'd been hurt, but I'd been debilitated and couldn't be sure. I felt Jacob shift beside me, andhe moved his hand back down to meet mine, rubbing circles across my knuckles with delicatefingers.

"She's completely fine, honey,” my mum said tenderly. “Thanks to you, it seems. She said you toldher to stay in the truck.”

“I just thought that if there were more, maybe, she'd have a chance to get away.”

“You'd make a fine Luna,” Jacob said, his voice sounding impressed even as he stopped tracingcircles into my hand, opting instead to grab it with both of his and squeeze tightly.

“I'm glad she didn't listen to you,” my mum said, the beginnings of a smile breaking out across herface, though her eyes betrayed her concern.

“As if she ever would,” I laughed. “I do feel a lot better. I don’t have to stay in here, do 1?”

“I'll fetch the doctor,” my mum said. Her eyes met mine, and she flicked them towards Jacob. One ofher eyebrows raised slightly, and then she pursed her lips and turned away.

"How are you feeling? Like, actually feeling. Don’t downplay it.” Jacob tried to look serious, but hisplump lips quirked at the edges and almost broke into a smile.

“I really do feel loads better now. Promise.”

"Yeah, but loads better than death is still pretty bad.”

I rolled my eyes. “I was never going to die, Jake.” I decided to quickly change the subject. My armand neck throbbed still, but it was bearable, and I no longer felt as though I was about to pass out."What happened to my sweater?”

"Oh," he said, pulling away from me. He felt around under his chair, and pulled out both mine andRosa's jumpers.

“You might want to wash it before you wear it. There's a lot of... blood.” He paused, looking thoughhe was about to cry. “I've been so worried about you, Ari. You wouldn't wake up.” He gulped.

“I'm fine now,” I murmured, pulling him back towards me. “See? Talking and everything.”

He laughed quietly; his eyes still brimming with unshed tears. I pressed a soft kiss to his cheek, andthen leant my forehead against his temple. His skin felt damp, and I brought my fingers up to tracethe planes of his cheeks, wiping away the spots of moisture.

His skin pulled as he smiled; I could feel it move beneath my fingertips. I let my hands move down,drawing the tip of my index finger along his lips. His mouth parted, and he kissed my fingerdelicately.

"You were so white,” he whispered. “Under your skin. You looked so pale.”

I pulled back to look at him properly, and his eyes were distant; staring at something that I couldn’tsee.

"You'd collapsed on the ground,” he breathed, his voice barely audible. “Rosa mindlinked me, and Iran. I didn't know what to expect, she just said she needed my help, and that you were hurt. Ipanicked,” he said, his voice breaking. Hearing him so sad made tears spring to my own eyes, but hekept talking as though he was in a trance.

“I tried to get you to sit up, to move, anything.” He clutched at me, clambering clumsily onto thebed and holding me in both arms, pulling me gently against his chest.

“I had to pick you up from the ground, Ari,” he choked. “I carried you here. Rosa could've done it,but she was too upset. I've never seen her like that. I had to be the one to do it. I told your parents.And you still wouldn't wake up.”

I felt a tear drop onto my head, and I wrapped my arms around him as tightly as I could. Mybandaged arm stung, and I hissed through my teeth. He moved as if to break free, but I used mygood arm to cling on tighter.

He settled against me, then, and I used the fingertips of my good hand to scrape lightly against hisback, drawing indecipherable tribal patterns of the sun and moon. He relaxed against me eventually,and we sat in silence for an indeterminable amount of time before my mum returned with thedoctor.

"How are you feeling?” She asked kindly. Our pack doctor was a young woman, said to have beendescended from the great Spirit Warrior's healer. She had natural, darker blonde hair pulled looselyback in a low ponytail, and bright pink lips that always seemed to be smiling. She had blue-greyeyes, which looked old and wise beyond their years.

I hadn't had the chance to speak to her much, as she also worked stints at a local human hospital;but I was desperate to, to replace out if her rumoured heritage was true. She had a captivating pullabout her, which drew you in and made her immediately likeable and trustworthy. I smiled.

“Loads better,” I said, drawing away from Jacob slightly.

“That's good,” she said, returning my grin. Her expression sobered before she spoke again.

"You suffered massive blood loss through extensive cuts on your neck, chest, and left arm.However,” she added, peering at me over her notes, “I have transfused a small amount, but anymore was not necessary. Your body started to regenerate itself even as I was working. It may take acouple of days for the cuts themselves to heal, but you should be fine to leave. I hear you're rathereager to.” She winked.

I felt bad, and scrambled for an excuse. “I'm not eager-“ I started, but stopped when I saw her andmy mum chortling together.

“It's okay,” she said, grinning. “You're a strong wolf. Your bandages will need changing once a dayuntil you're fully healed, though.”

I nodded, standing up from the bed. “Thanks, doc,” I beamed.

I walked back to the pack house with my mum and Jacob, one either side of me, watching mecarefully as though I might break. Jacob didn't let go of my hand once, and he hovered as close tome as he could.

“I have to grab something,” he said when we reached my floor. He looked tense, as though he didn'twant to leave me for even a second. “But — if you want to rest that's fine, of course — but if you stillwant to, I have something for you. It's just upstairs.”

“That's fine,” I grinned. “I'd like to. You could stay, if you want.”

His eyes widened minutely. We'd had thousands of sleepovers, and even shared a bed on occasion,but since last night things had felt different between us. The last vestiges of friendship seemed tohave slithered away with his confession that he'd reject his true mate for me, and it had onlyintensified with my injuries. He nodded, then, and gripped my hand tighter before letting go andjogging up the stairs.

I looked over at my mum, who was stood beside me with her hands on her hips. She smiled at me,though, before pulling me in for a hug.

“Don’t you ever scare me like that again,” she whispered in my ear. “Now,” she said, straighteningup. “I know Jacob will look after you. Be careful,” she added with a knowing look, before giving me aquick peck on the cheek and saying one last “Happy Birthday.” She then turned and walked towardsthe master bedroom on our floor, and I slunk into my bedroom.

I desperately wanted to collapse on my bed, but I felt grimy and I knew there was still dried bloodon me. I sighed and picked up my towel from where I'd dumped it on the floor on my way into mysmall en-suite.

I showered carefully, wary of getting my bandages wet. I took the showerhead from the wall andwashed away all of the dirt, sweat, and blood. I moisturised quickly, and slipped into a clean, baggyold t-shirt and the pair of shorts that I often wore as pyjamas.

I sat by my desk and unravelled my hair from its bun. I looked tired, the pallor of my face evidenteven with the foundation still covering parts of it. Most of it had been sweated off by this point, andI gladly removed the rest. I'd been too fearful of wetting the wraps around my arm, neck, and chestto wash my face in the shower. As I carefully wiped away my mascara I tried to mindlink Rosa,wanting to see if she was okay, but I was met with the blockade that meant she was sleeping.

I was cleaning my teeth when I heard a timid knock on my bedroom door. I gargled out “Come in!”assuming that it was Jacob. Sure enough, he called out as I heard the door shut.

“It's me,” he said, and I spat and rinsed my mouth quickly. Wiping my mouth with the back of myhand I hurried back into my bedroom.

He was cowering in the doorway, shrinking in on himself nervously. His eyebrows were knittedtogether; instinctively, I walked to him and brushed my fingertips across his brow, trying to soothethe tension there.

I took his hand and pulled him gently to my bed, and I collapsed onto it, snuggling myself into theduvet. I rolled so that I was effectively cuddling it, my left arm and leg slung on top of it. My neckpulsated, so I blindly felt for a pillow and tugged it towards me so that I could let my head flopdown onto it.

Jacob saw what I was doing, and pried the pillow from my grip. He settled himself cross-legged bymy side, and gently lifted my head onto his thigh. I relaxed into him, letting my weight rest fully onhis leg. He began toying with my hair, and I felt my eyes drifting shut.

“How are you feeling?” He asked, breaking the silence for the first time since he'd entered.“Drowsy,” I answered honestly. “But... I'm glad you're here, Jake. I feel better when you're around.”The words tumbled from my sleepy lips, and I chose not to linger on their meaning. I hummedcontentedly, rubbing my head against his bare thigh as I got settled. Then I stilled. Bare thigh?

I pulled back. He grumbled about it, and tried to keep my head where it was; his own was leant backagainst the wall, and his eyes were lidded. He was wearing a raggedy old t-shirt, which was wornand soft to the touch. It was one I'd seen him wear a number of times before — once it had been adark grey, but it was faded and patchy now.

He usually wore sweatpants in the evenings, but he was just in a pair of boxers. Normally, he'd keepthe trousers on until he got into bed. Maybe he was planning on going straight to sleep. That wasokay with me. I was exhausted.

“I want to give you your present,” he said, breaking me out of my reprieve. I peeled my eyelids back,squinting at him. Even the dim light in my bedroom was making my eyes ache.

My cuts were hurting more, too, and I wanted nothing more than to slip into oblivion. But I did likepresents. Jacob always got me something wonderful, too. Never too big or too flashy, but you couldtell he'd put a lot of thought into it.

“I'm listening,” I said, drawing the duvet away from me. I sat up so that I too was cross-legged andfacing him. He got up and walked towards the door. I immediately missed his presence. I watched,intrigued, as he quietly opened the door and slipped outside, returning almost instantly.

His hands held two scruffily wrapped parcels, both of which seemed to consist more of tape thanthe brown paper they were covered in. My tiredness dissolved immediately, and I felt a warm burstof joy in my chest. Despite all of the change surrounding us, this was something familiar. Jacob'swrapping was always terrible, but he wanted to do it himself. Even though he did his own every timehe never seemed to improve. Something about it made my heart clench fondly, but I couldnt putmy finger on why.

He took his seat in front of me again, and grinned at me, one present in each hand. One was largerand flat, and looked soft — as though it would meld between my fingers. Not quite squishy, butdefinitely pliant. The other was small, and so covered in tape that I had no idea how hard or soft thething inside was.

"Okay," he said, wiggling in place. He held the larger present out to me. “This one isn't your realpresent, this was sort of a last minute addition. You don't have to keep it if you don't like it, I cantake it back-" he said, and then caught himself, as though worried he'd reveal what was inside. Hemimed zipping his lips, still grinning, and nodded at me to open it.

I gently peeled back the tape, working my way around the parcel. Jacob rolled his eyes at me. Healways tore his presents apart during the unwrapping. I preferred to take my time, letting theexcitement fizzle in my chest at the mystery of what was inside.

The smell of roses and cherry blossom unfurled as I finally pulled apart the brown paper. Irecognised the fabric beneath the wrapping as one of Jacob's sweatshirts, one that I'd mentionedliking a few months ago. It was a faded brown colour, with a white symbol stitched into the left sideof the chest. It depicted two mountains stood either side of the sea, with a large full moon behindthem. It would definitely be too big for me, but I loved it. I carefully pushed the paper off of it fully,and pulled it over my head, beaming at Jacob all the while.

“Thank you,” I said, my voice a little choked up.

“Well,” he said, blushing, “I thought you might need one while your green one is in the wash. I knowit's your favourite, and this can't replace it, but I remember you saying you liked it and-"

I cut him off with a large hug, forcing the air from his lungs. He wheezed out a laugh.

“I take it you like it then?”

“I love it. I mean it, Jake. Thank you so much.”

He chuckled. “That's not even your actual present, Ari.” He wiggled his eyebrows at me. I laughedand held out my hands. The sleeves of the sweatshirt hung down, and I shimmied my hands in theair so that my hands were exposed.

He placed the smaller present in my outstretched hands. I used my nails to pick at the tape, andafter a frustrating minute of scraping around looking for an edge to peel up, I relaxed my mind andlet my wolf come forward. Not much — just enough for my canines and claws to extend. Using mywicked-sharp claw I tore a straight line down the centre of the parcel; I opened it from this seam asthough it was a cocoon.

Inside was an intricately carved wolf, made out of white wood with a turquoise inlay on its back.There were colourful arrows pointing down its sides, too

“It's beautiful,” I breathed, turning it over in my fingertips.

“It's a Zuni wolf fetish,” he said, his voice low as I admired it. “One of the warrior wolves isdescended from the Zuni tribe, and he carved it for me. It was strange, actually.” He paused.

“He said I did not need to tell him who it was for, or what I wanted it to look like. He said that hewould know. Something about the sacred dreamtime?” He shrugged, and then continued.

“The white wolf is guardian of the East. He said it was imbued with the true spirit of the wolf. Here,”he said, his fingers tracing the arrows, “these are for protection. You need to replace a home for it.Traditionally they would be kept in open-fronted ceramic pots, but anything that lets the wolf comeand go will work. It should feel safe and at home, and you should bond it with, Ari. Speak with itdaily. It should take you on a journey, deep into the past and forwards into the future. It is apathreplaceer, and will take you along with it, offering new ideas and wisdom. It is also said torepresent loyalty and dedication, but this is balanced with independence. It reminded me ofmating,” he said.

I absentmindedly stroked along the wolf's back, feeling the smooth turquoise beneath the pads ofmy fingers as I listened. “That's what mates are, to me. Someone you can rely on. You're a team, apartnership. It's not about two halves becoming whole. It's about two individuals joining forces,helping one another. That's-" his voice cracked, and I looked up at him; he turned his face away.“That's what I want with you, Ari. I don’t understand why we aren’t mates.”

I didn't know what to say. I very carefully set the wolf fetish on my bedside table, making sure that itwas upright and had a good view of my bedroom. Then, I shuffled closer to Jacob, taking his handsin mine. We sat opposite each other, and eventually he brought his eyes down to meet mine.

I suddenly felt very small, his sweatshirt engulfing my frame. A blush rose in my cheeks as hewatched me, tracking every minute movement my face made. My eyelashes fluttered against mycheeks as I broke his gaze. My wounds stung beneath his jumper. I buried my face in the crook ofhis neck, needing comfort that only he could provide. He brought his arms around me, and I spokeinto the skin pulled taut over his collarbone.

“I don't either,” I whispered. “I just want this all to make sense.” I could feel the warmth of my breathstuck in the air between my lips and his skin, hovering there, immobile. It was a damp, unpleasantwarmth, so I turned my head away.

"We can make it make sense together,” he breathed. He tightened his hold on me, as though afraidI would try to break free.

“I love you, Arienne,” he murmured, so quietly that I almost didn't hear it. My heart jumped in myribcage.

He caught my chin with delicate fingers and tilted my head back slightly. I kept my eyes on his as hebrought his lips towards mine.