The Defiant
Chapter Forty One

I stumbled out into the hallway, shell-shocked from Eight’s tirade. Forgetting that I’d been told to go to the bridge to fill the others in on the conversation, I shuffled to my room like a zombie, curling up in bed in as tight a ball as I could.

I didn’t fall asleep, just kind of floated, trying to avoid thinking about what Eight had said.

She was the reason we were all here. She’d probably been keeping tabs on us this whole time, reporting to her leaders, wrapping Five around her little finger so she could use and then discard him.

And all because she hated me.

“One? You in there?” Seven’s voice came through the speaker.

“Yeah,” I said vaguely, and told the computer to let her in.

“You talked to Eight? How’d it go?” Seven asked, coming toward me. I rolled onto my side to face her.

“She’s working for the Aerzhu,” I said dully.

“What?” Seven asked incredulously.

I filled her in on everything Eight had said to me. If I had been in a proper state of mind, it might have occurred to me to conceal some of the more personal things from her, but it just poured out of me.

“That bitch. She’s been working for them this whole time?”

I nodded glumly.

“And she blames you for all this?”

I nodded again.

“Listen, One, you can’t let her get to you. It’s just what she wants, to dig her claws in. It’s not your fault. An unfortunate turn of events, sure, but not your fault,” Seven said consolingly.

“But if it hadn’t been for me, none of us would be here.”

“First of all, some kids would still be here, forced to go through this. It just wouldn’t be us specifically. And you were just a baby. You couldn’t have changed your mom’s decision any more than she could’ve.”

“Maybe I could’ve learned about her, visited her, persuaded my mom to take custody of her when her adoptive father died…”

“Okay, listen to me right now.” Seven knelt on the floor in front of me and grabbed my shoulders, forcing me to look into her huge brown eyes. “If you never remember anything I’ve ever said to you, remember this: Other people’s emotions are not yours to control. You can do certain things to impact people’s feelings, but ultimately, how they feel is up to them, and sometimes nothing you do can impact it.

“Eight has got problems. She’s so twisted and bitter that she can’t see what’s really going on. She doesn’t hate you. She hates her idea of you, the person who stole her chance at happiness. That person isn’t you. Moreover, that person doesn’t exist. No one can control Eight’s happiness but Eight. If she chose, she could forget all that hatred and anger. She could choose to be happy. But she hasn’t. She’s chosen to make others miserable. And that’s no way to deal with problems.

“So you listen to me. All the decisions Eight’s made that have led her to this; none of them are your fault. Maybe someone could have done something to help her. But the responsibility for her actions rests solely on her. Her choices, her emotions, her fault. Not yours.”

“I can’t believe this!” Three exclaimed.

“She’s been manipulating us all this whole time,” Two said plainly.

“Why would she tell us this now? Why tip her hand?” Four asked. That was a good question. I hadn’t stopped to think why Eight had told us this now...

“Maybe she was just so mad she just couldn’t stay quiet anymore,” Three said.

“No, I don’t think that’s it. She’s been in control, this whole time. She’s never let her facade crack. And I could tell, she chose to tell me. She knew what she was going to do. It wasn’t just a spur-of-the-moment thing,” I said.

“What if she just gave up hope? She knows we won’t let her go until we unload the passenger at Sorhna. She could have just figured the end was near and decided to hurt One before it was all over,” Six suggested.

“Does Eight seem like the type to wait patiently for this mission her whole life and then give up right before the end? That can’t be it,” Seven said thoughtfully.

“She’s up to something,” I realized.

“Yeah, gotta be,” Two said.

“What do you mean?” Three asked.

“Think about it. Eight has a motive for everything she does. She’s a great actress, too, none of us figured out what she was until she wanted us to. There has to be a reason for her to tell us all of this now, and she won’t tell us. We’ll just have to watch her carefully, make sure she doesn’t do anything,” I said.

“I say we take turns guarding the door,” Three said. Murmurs of assent.

“I’ll make up a schedule,” Seven said.

“We have one more thing to decide on,” I said.

“What?” Six asked.

“Should we tell Five?”

“No,” Seven said immediately. “It’s only going to hurt him, and we have no reason to do that.”

“Other than the fact that he betrayed us?” Two said.

“I think we should tell him. If he realizes Eight was only manipulating him to get his help, he might give One the verbal command back,” Three pointed out.

“We need to get the ship moving in order to get the passenger to Sorhna,” Six reminded Seven.

“Vote?” I said. I put up my hand, along with the others. Even Seven reluctantly raised her hand.

“Okay. That’s settled. Who wants to tell him?”

“You, One. He likes you.”

“No, he does not, believe me.” Not anymore, I added silently.

“I’m not going in there,” Two said. “I can’t look at him.”

And in the end, I couldn’t convince them otherwise without telling them about my past with Five.

“I’m so sorry, Five.”

Five lifted his head from his hands, where it had been for the last ten minutes while I’d told him all that Eight had said to me, and all the implications. I expected to see sadness on his face, betrayal, or even confusion. I hadn’t expected anger.

“You’re lying,” he said, voice flat, but I could hear the simmering fury underneath.

“No, I’m not. I swear, Five, that’s what she told me—”

“YOU’RE LYING!” he bellowed, leaping to his feet. I stumbled back and tripped, landing on the floor. He towered over me.

“You just want to get back at me for dumping you. You’re lying! Eight wouldn’t do that to me. She loves me. Get out!”

No need to tell me twice. I scrambled to my feet and retreated to the hallway.

In the room behind me, I could have sworn I heard crying.