The Game Of Quadruplet Mates
(Bk 2) Chapter 32

Forever never felt so impossible

Not when de a th itself was knocking on our door.

Not when de a th was coming for O.

And coming for him soon.

The tragic reality that I have been pushing back since I first saw him in the Games starts flooding in, drowning me and pulling us apart.

My throat constricts. "Why can't we-"

But he doesn't let me finish, dismissing my words by pressing a kiss on my cheek, on my tears that fell and fell and fell. "I know what you're going to say. Why can't we fight it? Why can't we continue on and make the most out of it? The answer is simple, my beautiful girl, I won't let you. I can't do it. I won't do this to you. We can't be happy and mated, only for my sickness to take me away from you too soon. I can't let that happen. As painful as it is, I need you to have a life without me. I need you to live for us, for me." A life without him.

To live for him.

I know. I have known this for so long.

It was the reason no one wanted us together.

Everyone warned us. Never stopped warning us.

Because it would end too soon.

And we both know I won't survive it when he goes.

I can barely stand the thought now.

That's why I tried to stay away, tried to keep my heart away from him, but it was hard.

It is hard when all I ever wanted was him.

When all he's ever wanted was us to be together.

We weren't meant for each other. I knew this from the very beginning, but like he said... like I had agreed to... we wanted to make the most out of it while we still could.

And as much as it hurt, I enjoyed the little time we shared in the Games.

"I won't be able to rest peacefully knowing I left you. And I know what I'm asking, what I'm about to witness- what I have been witnessing with you and these other men. It has been difficult for me, I won't lie about that." He grimaces, eyes closing from the pain he was feeling inside, the pain that I was causing.

Because I'm sure it hasn't been easy for him, seeing me with other men that were supposed to be him.

His voice c ra c ks, unable to hold it together any longer. "These past few days have hurt me more than when I first found out I was dy in g. But the truth is, I want you to be with someone else. No matter how hard it is for me, I want you to be happy with someone that will love you like I love you. Someone that will treat you better than I ever could.

Someone that will be there for you... like I want to be."

He was crying.

He was breaking down in front of me

And I couldn't do anything but cry along with him

"I'm sorry if I let it drag on and I kept coming back to you. I was trying my hardest to let go, to move on, to support your future without me." His hold around me tightens as he says this. "I know I haven't done a good job and I've failed you all over again. First, my sickness and now having to let you go." The tears wouldn't stop as I held him like he was about to slip away at any moment.

He presses another kiss on my shoulder and then another on my forehead, this one much longer. "But I understand how I've made you feel, how confusing I have been and I'm sorry. I will stop. I will keep away. I will let you go."

O wasn't always sick. At least, I don't think so. He was always so strong, and big, and mighty, worthy of his title and position.

But then he was suddenly tired.

So tired that it became alarming.

When the pack doctors checked him, they found out that he had an incurable illness that would kill him in time.

But O never showed it.

At least not to us... not to me.

He was always brave and when I'm around, smiling And I admired him.

I cared about him.

And I know he felt the same for me.

It was a relief that he was so much older and that we wouldn't be together at the Games. That is, until he got himself disqualified and we were doomed

I even forgot about it until I saw him waiting for me.

"Do this for me, please." He begged, lips trembling as he placed another kiss on my forehead.

"Find someone else.

Be happy with whoever lucky b a sta rd you choose. I'll be okay as long as you're okay."

The saddest part was that he was being honest.

That despite how it would ruin him to see me with someone else, he would still be happy.

Just because I was happy.

This was all he ever wanted.

My happiness.

"Won't you replace love too?" I whispered through shaky breaths. "Find your happiness?"

He smiles and it devastates me further. "I've already found it. I don't need anyone else. You have been enough. You have always been all I needed"

A wretched sob leaves my lips and I swear I feel my ribs cracking with our heart breaking this all was.

He took my face between his hands and stared at me with a look that only confirmed the inevitable:

This time, truly, we were done.

This was closure.

Nothing else.

"Not too long ago, when I first found out about my illness, you made a promise to me." He mused through the tears in his eyes. "You promised me that you would have fun. You promised me that despite everything you'll try to be happy with or without me." "You forced that promise out of me." I accused, frowning at him as I fought the s c re a m that wanted to leave my throat. "You were with the pack doctors and was as pale as the white walls. I was wailing and you took advantage of the moment by forcing me to swear it to you."

"You pinky swore it to me." He says as if that answered everything. "You have no escape."

"I'm not trying to escape." But I was talking about something else.

"You have to." He knew what I meant when he said it.

"0-"

He silences me by running his fingers over my lips, his breath hitching. "I's time to forget. It's time you moved on."

This was it

We couldn't be.

Even if we both wanted it, we were doomed from the beginning

We were just making the most out of it as we could.

I wiped my face, blinking away the tears that would not stop falling. "I would have loved you through it all. I don't care how short."

He nodded, the smile on his lips such a contrast to the pain in his expression. "I know. I know you would have."

But that wasn't enough.

He only came to the Games for me, to watch over me, to make sure I was in good hands.

That was all.'

"But I want more for you, more than I could ever offer. You would want more for me too if the roles were reversed." He tells me, trying his hardest to smile. "You know this.

"I know," I said, even if it was a hard thing to swallow.

He has always prioritized me.

He always made it a point to choose me over himself.

That's just how he was.

I forced a smile that hurt to do. "I better go."

His eyes swept the room before swallowing. "Yes. You should."

He didn't want me to go

Like I didn't want to go

But what were we supposed to do?

He hasn't even let me go yet, his arms still wrapped around me tightly. In turn, my fingers were still clutching his clothes, my nails digging down into the rich fabric.

I could feel the seconds tick by with neither of us pulling away.

Before I could think of leaving, he took me by the face again, desperation leaking from his words like if he didn't say it now, he never would. "I love you. I love you so much. Don't ever forget it. My de a th won't change that."

Each word that he said managed to break me into even more pieces.

I sniffled, unable to say back to him.

Because saying it will just destroy me beyond repair and to be able to get through the week, I have to keep my head up.

The truth is out and final.

O would never choose me. Not like this. Somehow, I know I wouldn't choose him either. With everything between us, with everything that we had to do, there was no room for us. Not in the future. And as much as it was sad, I had to keep moving.

For both of us.

That's what he wants.

And I wasn't going to disappoint him.

As I take a step back from 0, I wish it was the first night again. Us. Together. Our problems forgotten. I wish time would have frozen at that moment when I had him and he had me.

When we knew but never said it out loud.

I feel the moment when his hand slips from me, how he literally and figuratively lets me go and another wave of tears falls from my eyes.

My head dips low, giving him the respect he deserves." Good bye, Mister O."

"Good bye, Miss X." I didn't look at him.

My heart or what's left of it squeezed painfully as I turned away and walked out of the party that was happening around us. I walked away from the laughter, the music and the neon lights, heading for the dark hallways. He didn't follow.

I didn't need to look behind me to know.

He meant it this time when he said good bye.

But someone was following me and it wasn't 0 or my guard.

It was someone that grabbed me roughly by the shoulder nd threw me hard against the wall.

"I'm not done with you yet, Miss X."