The Girl Next Door
The Boy Next Door Chapter 34

f**k.

Harsh sunlight filters through my eyelids and I wake with a satisfying stretch. It's been a while since I've felt this well rested. Like I slept for twenty-four hours straight. As soon as I shift, I realize that I'm not alone. There's a warm body snuggled up against me. Well, It takes a moment for my sluggish brain to conjure up the events from last night.

Alyssa.

Dinner at my place.

Unable to sleep and shooting her a text.

I crack open an eye only to replace her sprawled across my bare chest. There is nothing better than waking up with her in my arms. Even though my feelings for her had scared the s**t out of me, I regret pushing her away sophomore year. I have no idea if it's possible to get back to a place where she can trust me again, but I'm determined to do everything in my power to give it a shot and prove to Alyssa that I can be the man she needs. All I know is that I need to slow my roll and not come on too strong.

If I push too hard, she'll run. And I can't blame her for that. She handed over her heart for safekeeping and I stomped it to smithereens.

A strange contentment fills me as I watch her sleep. Even though I want this moment to last forever, I know it won't. As soon as she wakes, the protective armor she cloaks herself in will fall back into place and she'll continue to hold me at a firm distance. Unable to resist touching her, I stroke my fingers over her golden head. Alyssa has beautiful long hair. I love having it swathed across my body. I love wrapping it around my fist and tugging it. I told myself when we were together that it was pure and simple f*****g. She'd always been up for anything. Whatever I wanted to do. However I wanted to use her body, she let me do it. She was sexually adventurous. Always willing to push the limits.

But the last time we had s*x, and she admitted that she loved me, was different. Softer. Somehow more meaningful. No longer could I pretend that it was nothing more than mindless screwing. It scared the s**t out of me. I freaked out and pushed her away. I made damn sure to blow up our relationship so that I could walk away.

Not once did it occur to me that forgetting about her and moving on would be impossible.

A soft sound escapes from Alyssa as she shifts against me. My fingers still. I'm nowhere near ready for this interlude to end. For a few more minutes, she drifts in and out of sleep before finally opening her eyes and turning her head until our gazes lock. Slowly she blinks away the sleepiness.

I remain silent.

She's so f*****g beautiful that my throat has closed up on me.

"Morning." Her body stills. Her top was shed during the night, leaving her as bare chested as I am.

I clear my throat along with the thick emotion trapped inside it. "Sleep good?"

"Yeah, I did." Her voice is deep and sexy.

Ever since I was a freshman in college, I've made it a rule never to spend the night with a chick. f*****g is one thing. Sleeping in someone's bed and having an awkward convo the morning after is quite another.

Alyssa has always been the exception to that rule. She's the only girl I've spent the night with. The only one I've held in my arms for hours at a time. The only one I've woken up with in the morning. I have no idea if that's the case for her. I've done my best to blot out the fifteen months that we've been apart. As much as I want to ask, I can't summon the words. I have no right to delve into her past when I'm the one who pushed her away and shattered her heart. "Me, too."

Even though I'm afraid to push my luck, the question escapes before I can rein it in again. "What are your plans for the day?"

Her drowsiness falls away as she watches me carefully. "Homework. Maybe some grocery shopping."

As we stare at each other, it feels like I'm standing on the edge of a precipice. One leap and I could plummet to my death. The fear of being rejected is terrifying. "Maybe we could spend it together?" Indecision flickers in her eyes as she gnaws her lower lip and glances away. "I don't know. Is that necessarily a good idea?"

My hands go to her cheeks, forcing her to meet my stare head on. "I told you that I'm not going to give up on you. Or us. We can take this as slow as you need. Just give me time to prove that I'm not the same guy I was before. That's all I'm asking."

My heart jackhammers almost painfully as silence stretches between us. I've done everything I can think of to change her mind. And maybe...maybe it won't be enough. "Lys?"

She draws in a breath before whispering, "Okay."

Relief rushes through me, leaving me to feel almost giddy. Before I can think better of it, I give in to the impulse rushing through me and lock my fingers around her delicate wrists before flipping her over onto the mattress. A squeak of surprise escapes from her as I drag her arms over her head and pin them to the headboard. Heat flashes in her eyes.

I'm all about taking this slow, but I also want to feed the need she has. And I know exactly what Alyssa needs because I feel it as well.

"Colton..." A fine tremble works its way through her voice as she shifts restlessly beneath me.

"Yeah, baby?" My lips ghost over hers, never giving in to the baser urges clawing beneath the surface of my skin. More than anything, I want to rip her panties away and bury myself deep inside her tight heat.

But I can't do that. The next time we have s*x, she'll be mine.

"You said that we could take this slow."

I press my mouth to hers before murmuring against her lips, "And so I will."

With that, I release her wrists and pull away just enough to stare down at her. She's so f*****g beautiful with her blond hair spread out across the snowy white pillowcase. Her blue eyes are wide and watchful as a deep flush stains her cheeks. A thin scrap of material is all that bars her core from me. My c**k stiffens as a punch of arousal hits me full force. The urge to plunder her sweetness roars through me. It takes every ounce of restraint to beat back the need I have for her.

Even though I'm no longer holding her captive, her arms remain above her head as she shifts beneath my gaze. Her breasts are high and tight with little pink n*****s that beg to be played with. The temptation is too much to take and I lean down, capturing one perfect bud with my lips. A whimper slips free from her as I suck it greedily into my mouth. After a few moments of torture, I allow the hard tip to pop free before drawing its twin between my lips. When I bite down gently on her flesh, a hiss of pleasure escapes. Her fingers thread their way through my hair as if to hold me in place. My d**k is rock hard. Any moment, I'm going to explode in my boxers which hasn't happened since...well, never. It just goes to show how this girl affects me. The truth of the matter is that she always has. Only now am I coming to terms with it.

Alyssa shifts impatiently beneath me and I know without a shadow of a doubt that if I stripped her bare and mounted her, she wouldn't stop me. No, she'd probably beg for it.

But then I'd be breaking my promise to take it slow, wouldn't I? And I can't do that.

If I've learned anything over the past couple of weeks, it's that Alyssa will go into avoidance mode in the blink of an eye. She's tried pulling a disappearing act after both times we were together. So, no. I'm not about to give her a reason to turn tail and run from me for a third time. I just have to remember that slow and steady wins the race. Especially when it comes to this girl.

It's with a s**t ton of regret that I allow her n****e to pop free from my mouth. Both breasts are rosy from all the attention. Unable to help myself, I pluck the tiny buds between my fingers, continuing to toy with them. Her eyelids feather closed as she arches her back as if silently offering them up to me.

"I love your breasts." I tug at the stiff little n*****s, pulling and tweaking them in tandem. It's pleasure infused pain at its very best. What I love most is that this turns her on just as much as it does me. With one last playful tug, I release them.

If I don't shift gears now, it'll be too late, and I'll end up spreading her thighs and doing exactly what I know we shouldn't. "How about I run out and grab us some coffee?"

Alyssa blinks a few times as if that's the last thing she expected to pop out of my mouth. "Coffee?" Her lips wrap around the word as if it's foreign. "Now?"