The King’s Tainted Mate
Chapter 38

If I was not my own witness to how much I felt for my mate, how much I longed for her, how much I cared, I would think mine was the fate of bringing only pain to her poor soul and ensuring she remained unhappy. Staring at my family heirloom while I paced the silent floors of my wing in the palace, I wished I could undo my actions. I had hurt her yet again. Despite all the promises I'd made, I had gone ahead and hurt her all over again.

I had been selfish. It was not my intention, but when she'd declared in front of the multitude of witnesses that she accepted me, my heart had exploded. Even when I knew that she did so out of spite, the pounding in my chest had drummed with a melodius rhythm, loud enough for every wolf in the hall to hear. I could barely keep from howling in jubilation too as my wolf suddenly wished he could sprout wings and fly at her declaration.

And despite her intentions, I had hoped there was more. When she'd held my gaze, I could have sworn that I saw it. Hidden behind those breathtaking eyes it lay and that had spurred my decision to jump at the opportunity. To momentarily turn a blind eye to the shocking discoveries I'd made and make sure she was mine before anymore protests arose, or before she had a moment to rethink her decision and let fate interfere.

I had thought the moment perfect, but in the end, all I knew was that she had not smiled when I presented her with the most precious jewel I would ever gift her. Her beautiful eyes had only sparkled with something that had given me hope after what I'd witnessed between her and my chosen mate, but it was gone just as quickly as it had appeared, leaving me with nothing but dread as my mate lay limp in my arms.

"A midnight run will do you good." Rakon mumbled beside me. While I waited for my mate to wake, he'd stayed not only as the head of my guard, but as my best friend too and for once he'd done so, quietly, even when he had all the rights to scold me. He'd been right after all.

"Not tonight." I shook my head and understanding registered in his eyes as we both slipped back into silence and kept pacing.

I knew he was right, however. A good run would definitely shed off some of the feelings weighing heavily on me, but I was unwilling to shed any of them. I deserved all the pain resulting from my own misjudgement of my mate's actions on that fateful day. And while I had rage simmering beneath my skin over the matter, I had chosen to ensure Shyla was alright before anything else. I couldn't bear being away from her either and that run would do exactly that. Being stuck outside my bed chambers, away from her, was already driving me insane.

The doors to the said chambers swung open and I was before them before whoever meant to walk out did.

"Is she alright? Will she be alright?" I held my breath as I stared into my mother's tired eyes. At least they were not sad, giving me a glimmer of hope. She, Liira and a couple of royal midwives had been holed up in my bed chambers attending to my mate for longer than I would have liked. "Mother?" I panicked even more when she said nothing.

"Of course, dear." A warm smile graced my mother's lips and every dreadful feeling that had been holding me captive since I caught my mate's collapsing body at dinner loosened its hold. "She will be alright!"

"Oh thank the gods!" I melted into my mother's embrace, body bleeding out all the nerves. "She will be alright." I mumbled, holding on tighter as though I were a little child again.

"It is nothing more than what you would expect when one is carrying the heir to Xatis." My mother reassured me. But until I saw her with my own eyes, until I held her in my arms, that reassurance would not be complete.

"I wish to see her."

"Not just yet boy." I had barely taken a step before Liira decided to finally open her mind link to me, snapping her command. And before I could snap back at her out of impatience and risk being kept out of the room longer, the link went dead again.

Dread crept upon me and I turned to my mother. "Are you sure everything is alright? What of my child?" Mother had said everything was alright with my mate, but Liira's actions built more cracks in that reassurance. I couldn't just assume it extended to the child my mate carried too.

"Oh he's strong. Perhaps even stronger than you, son." She grinned, making me relax a fraction. "Of course it is to be expected, but I suspect we are in for a big surprise." My mother's grin grew impossibly wide, making me frown. "Surprise?"

"I'll leave that to Liira."

"Grandmother? Is that why she insists in making me wallow in my misery by keeping me out here?" Was she playing doctor while I was going out of my mind with waiting? For once I felt like going against my grandmother's better judgement. Damn the consequences. "Oh you know how she is when she makes discoveries." "Discoveries? What discoveries?" I held my mother's gaze. Despite knowing that everything was alright, I felt uneasy.

"Your mate is one special wolf my dear." I knew Shyla was special. She was my moon goddess' given mate, but the glint in my mother's eyes spoke of something more and I couldn't wait any longer. I side stepped the former queen of Xatis with every intention to barge into my own bed chambers and make discoveries of my own, but I was held back by my mother. When I almost glared at her, she simply smiled. "Will you talk with your mother before you do?" She pulled my now stiffened self away from the entrance to my bed chambers before I could turn down her request. Posted by Narugi.com; visit us for more free novels.

Having an inkling of what she wished to speak of, I dragged my feet a little in a subtle protest. Of course that would never deter the woman who'd birthed and raised me when she wished to ensure her son was fine.

"Are you alright?" Her tired eyes regained some of that usual concern she always had for me when she knew something was weighing heavily on me.

I nodded. Despite being nowhere near it or wishing not to be after the discovery I'd made when my mate had laid bare part of what I had not known about fate's dealings the first time we met.

"I just wish to make sure she is alright, mother." She could read me like a book and I knew my mother bought nothing of the picture I attempted to paint of me being alright. Her understanding smile and the ensuing warm embrace was evidence of that. "You will be alright. Both of you." I wished I could share in her belief, so badly. But as I finally stepped into my bed chambers and beheld my mate's sleeping form, I was reminded of how easily our happiness eluded us each time and how incapable I was from keeping it from happening despite promising to.

"Your majesty..." A couple of midwives stepped back from my enomous bed and bowed low, leaving only Liira. My grandmother had a thoughtful look on that morphed into a happy expression once her eyes landed on me.

"We are just about done here." Liira nodded to the midwives who flowed out of the room with her permission. Once the last one of them exited, she turned back to me, her happy expression replaced by a frown. "Will you now remain by the door after your disobedience?"

"I..." My throat worked, my lips moved, but no words slipped through. My feet refused to work too and I could only stare at my grandmother, unsure if I could approach, unable to inquire of the discoveries she'd made. My mate did look alright...and at peace. I did not wish to take that away from her as I had learnt I was in the habit of doing.

"Despite what it might look like, or the circumstances, one's mate and their presence is like a drug like no other." Liira gathered her things as she left me to ponder on her words that I knew to be true. I had experienced that when Shyla's presence had shielded me form Myrna's spell, but I had a feeling that was not what Liira was alluding to at all. "And the only thing you are guilty of today is making her feel something for you beyond your bond." My grandmother only gave me her cryptic smile when I looked askance at her. Unlike my mother, Liira's ways of comfort involved having me focus on what mattered in the midst of the pain. No pampering. But surely she didn't mean... My eyes found my mate once again while my heart thudded in my chest. She had to be wrong, right? "I will see you later." Grandmother bid me goodbye and I only nodded with half a mind. Her words had renewed my hope and the moment she left my chambers, I stepped closer to my mate, my feet deciding to agree with me.

Shyla...my breath hitched as I took in her beautiful form gracing my once lonely bed. I'd dreamed of this image a thousand times before, but non of those visions could compare to the utter display of heavenly beauty that left me in awe of my mate. Her long beautiful hair had been let loose, leaving her facial features relaxed and her natural beauty shining in the dimly lit space. The beautiful gown she'd worn for dinner was replaced by an exquisite night gown that left my mouth dry and my wolf wanting nothing but to claim her. To have the glorious view of what lay underneath. To get a taste of it and not only with my tongue.

"This is so not the time to lust after her." I chastised my own mind, but the mere mention of it only served to deepen the unbidden desire that was already raging in my flesh. And the longer I stared, the wilder the desire became and the harder it was for me to tame it. I wished to give in. Wished to slip in right beside her and inhale her scent. I wished to wake her and pick up right where I had stopped the last time I had kissed and touched her luscious body to my heart's content. I wished to do everything I'd dreamt of doing to my mate once I got her to my bed. Everything I had spent many nights turning over in my head ever since Shyla had been within my palace walls.

My wolf was in total agreement as the beast pulsed under my flesh, ready to indulge in the pleasurable dance of love making. He was ready to conquer her body tonight, but this would simply not do and before I made more mistakes with her, I tore my gaze away from my mate and headed for the doors. I needed to calm down. Us both.

"Elian..." Her tone was soft and mighty at the same time. Mightier than my own, a king's, bringing me to an instant stop. "Don't leave."

I spun around, mouth drier than the desert lands of our realm. Whether that was because of the way my name beautifully rolled off her tongue or the sexy sleepy sound from her lips or the fact that she longed for me to stay after all, I was not sure. "Are you certain?" Because I trusted not myself in her presence, because I knew without a shadow of doubt that if she requested anything of me I would grant it in a heart beat, I needed to be sure she meant her words.

"....where am I?" Somehow she got distracted, sitting up in the bed as she took in her surroundings.

"In my bed... bed chambers." I answered distractedly as my eyes took in her female contours that had become even more pronounced now that she was seated.

"Your bed chambers?!" She snapped, drawing my attention. A bitter expression painted her beautiful face as she struggled to abandon the comfort of my bed.

I was by her side in heart beat, knowing why. "I swear, she has not been in my bed, ever." Even when I believed that my mate had betrayed me, bringing Myrna to my bed had just seemed not right and as I held my mate's gaze, something loosened in my heart. I had finally done something right. If the stunned expression, mixed with relief on my mate's face was anything to go by.

"What?"