The Misbegotten
Contagion? - Summer 2018

I had just put the smart device back onto mynightstand. I was glancing back at Katiewith what had to be the goofiest expression on my face when I realizedsomething was wrong. Everything I’d hadbeen thinking about vanished in seconds.

Her eyes filled with tears. She began to stand, but got no farther thanhunched over. She was at the waist,clutching her midsection. Her other handshe clamped over her mouth. So fiercewas her grip, the blood had drained from both her finger tips and hercheeks. She took a few staggering stepsfrom the bed when I understood what was happening.

Katie wasgoing to be sick! She was going to throwup all over the carpeted floor!

She took a few more wavering strides before I bodilypicked her up and rushed her to the bathroom. I didn’t bother trying to get her to the toilet or the sink. I just shoved aside the opaque, glass doors,tore down our drying towels and let her vomit into the bathtub. I held her upright, positioned correctly, soshe wouldn’t make a mess all over the tiled floor.

By the third or fourth retch she paused long enough soI could get her loose-fitting shirt off. I didn’t want her to foul any of her clothing. I only just made it. I was one second past pulling it over herhead when another powerful heave came.

Once more, she bent over the tub. She splashed it with the last contents of herstomach.

I lowered her to her knees and helped her brace herhands, so she could hold herself upright. I bolted over to the light switch, turning on the lights and the highpowered ceiling fan at the same time. We were going to need it. A few seconds later, I was back at herside with a glass of water and a damp wash cloth in hand.

Katie continued to lean over the edge of the tub for aminute or two. When it seemed her boutof nausea had passed. She glanced in mydirection, her eyes still watery and blood shot. She took the cup of water and began to swishthe clear liquid in her mouth. She didthat for a few moments, then gargled for a few more and spit like a prizefighter into the bathtub.

“Oh god, that was horrible!” she announced with a gaspof air. Her voice was raw, strained inmy ears.

“It snuck up on you didn’t it?” I inquired, knowingfirsthand what she’d just experienced.

“Fuck yeah, and fast!” she exhaled, took another gulpof water, repeating what she’d done before. Only now, she took a much smaller sip. This she swallowed. “I was fineone minute,” she went on, “and then I felt dizzy. Before I could stop it, my insides turnedupside down and everything just came up.

“That was the most fucking grossest shit I have everfelt in such a short amount of time.” She looked at me askance, from the corner of her eye. “Is that what it felt like this morning?”

I nodded. “Almost to the letter.”

“Fuck that shit, Estefan, that was fucking fucked up.”

I laughed. Katie always found a way to say the f-word at least three times asentence when something completely went against her nature. Bomb-puking seemed to be one such thing.

“You ok, though?” I queried. I was still smiling at her colorful way ofdescribing the obvious. “Do you wantanything?”

“No.” She putone hand on her right knee and used it as leverage to stand upright. “I’m just gonna brush my teeth, because thetaste in my mouth is going to make me wanna up-chuck again. I don’t think my stomach and throat couldtake any more abuse.”

I was watching her when she teetered coming erect. I rushed to her. I held her by the elbow for support andwalked her to the sink, so she could brush her teeth.

“I guess, when the shit hits the fan, we make a prettygood team.” She reached for hertoothbrush, next to mine in the holder. She missed it, didn’t even nudge it.

I frowned and stared at her for a few more moments,looking into her eyes. I was trying tosee if they’d dilated, indicative that she was sicker than she was lettingon. But, they appeared normal to me. They were a little watery, but otherwise,they looked fine. I plucked hertoothbrush from it place and opened the drawer where I kept thetoothpaste. I quickly spread some acrossthe top of the bristles and then gave it to her.

“Thanks, ‘Cuz,” she said as she grasped the handle andmade to brush her teeth, then stopped short. “I’m glad we were both here when each of us got sick, it’s kinda cute…gross, but cute.” Then she began toclean her mouth in earnest.

“You ok, Kat?” I had to ask, because I wanted to start cleaning up her mess. The smell was starting to get to me and therewas no way in fucking hell did I wish to throw up for a second time thatmorning. That would be… Fucking fucked up!

She nodded. Herhand supported her weight as she held onto the countertop.

“Ok, but if you feel woozy or nauseous or anything outof the ordinary, you make sure you sit down. Don’t try to do anything, ok? Iwill be right over here.” I pointed atthe bathtub.

She grimaced at once. “Tho, Effy, thon’t cween that! I’ll thoo thwat,” she said around all the crap in her mouth.

I just waved her off, walked over to the tub. I turned on the shower, looking back at herover my shoulder. “If you can do it forme, then I can do it for you. Besidesyou said it yourself, we’re a team right? A good one at that, so just take care of your dragon mouth. I’ll take care of this shit.”

She smiled and flipped me off, a true multi-task’er. She turned back to the sink to spit. “Fucker!” was her accusation once her mouthwas clear of suds.

“That’s cousin-fucker to you, beyotch,” I correctedwithout thinking. I manually directed theshowerhead about the bathtub. I madesure I didn’t miss a single drop of Katie’s puke.

By the sink, Katie laughed out loud. Her beautiful, rich laugh came from somewheredeep in her throat. It could originatein no other place than the very wellspring of her soul.