The Star (Charleston Condors Book 1) -
The Star: Chapter 9
Still, as he sat in the mostly-dark kitchen, staring at his email inbox, at the first email sitting innocuously there, just waiting for him to open it and destroy what was left of his victory high, he’d hoped that maybe Aidan might discover a shred of brotherly feeling and congratulate him instead of criticizing him.
Maybe he had.
Riley wouldn’t know unless he opened it and read the contents.
He was tempted to do it. Before, he’d always read Aidan’s emails, as shitty as they could be, because there were so many important lessons and bits of advice intertwined between the blunt judgments.
You really should read it, a voice inside him insisted. What if Aidan has something to say you need to hear?
“You gonna sit there and stare at the screen for hours?”
Riley glanced up and saw Landry standing at the edge of the kitchen, big, brawny arms crossed over his equally big, brawny chest. It was still hard for Riley to get used to the sight.
At least he was wearing shorts now, not like the other night when he’d been wearing just the briefs that had hugged his thighs and his…well, all the parts Riley was trying very hard not to think about.
Trying and failing, if he was being honest.
Riley sighed. “Welcome to my weekly debate about whether to tell Aidan to fuck off.”
“That’s up for debate?” Landry came up behind him. Riley could feel the heat of him.
Wanted to lean back and feel all of it.
But just because Landry had come out to him and Riley suspected that his sexual awakening might’ve been because of him, he wasn’t sure, and it wouldn’t be right to just assume he was responsible and Landry liked him the way he liked Landry.
Because he did.
It definitely wasn’t just a silly schoolboy crush anymore. This was full-blown like bordering on obsession.
“Actually, yeah,” Riley admitted. “A lot of the time, he has good advice.”
“And the other times?” Landry asked archly.
“He’s your best friend.”
“Yeah. Exactly. I know what an asshole he can be. More than just about anyone else,” Landry retorted, voice dry. “What do you think you’re missing out on by deleting his emails and sending one back telling him to mind his own fucking business?”
“Well, the advice for starters.”
Riley glanced back, and Landry’s gaze was dead serious. “You really think,” he asked slowly, “that you wouldn’t get that from someone else? Like Charlie? Or even Coach Oscar?”
It was a decent point. “I don’t know.”
“And what does this do to you each time?”
Riley frowned. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, when you don’t read them and just delete them, you’re getting rid of an extra negative voice in your head. A negative voice you don’t need,” Landry said, and suddenly his hands were on Riley’s bare shoulders, just below his tank top, and he wasn’t just touching him in a reassuring manner, but practically fucking caressing him. Riley’s heartbeat accelerated. He really wasn’t used to Landry touching him like this.
Would he ever get used to it?
Not likely.
“But what—”
“What if the advice is good?” Landry shrugged. “So what if it is? It’s still not worth your peace of mind, Riley.”
Riley stared at him. “You are not what I expected.”
“What, you thought I’d be your brother’s number one supporter? Or even worse, his deputy in trying to terrorize you out of football?” Landry shook his head. “And speaking of not being what I expected…”
Riley knew he was talking about him. He knew. And yet instead of turning on the barstool and pressing his lips against Landry’s, he stayed where he was.
“No. Yes. I don’t know.” Riley laughed self-consciously.
“We’re friends, aren’t we? Don’t friends want what’s best for each other?”
That got Riley to turn in his seat.
Landry was close. So close, he could see all the shades of honey in his eyes, each blade of scruff on his chin, grown in after a few days of not shaving. So close he could see the tiny bit of eye black on his cheek that he’d missed during his shower.
Riley’s heart contracted. He wasn’t used to this fierce, wild wanting.
Didn’t know how to compartmentalize it the way he always had.
Especially not when he could literally watch as Landry’s pupils dilated with his own share of want.
That was the problem, wasn’t it?
“Landry,” he said softly, “we’re not friends.”
Landry froze. “What?”
Probably nobody had ever told him in his whole life that he wasn’t a friend. People gravitated towards him because, even though he wasn’t the loudest guy in the room or the most demonstrative, there was a solidness to him. A ride-or-die loyalty.
It was why he’d worried, at least at first, that Landry would be exactly what he’d suggested—Aidan’s lieutenant first and foremost.
But he hadn’t been.
He’d been in Riley’s corner from the very first.
“We’re not friends,” Riley said. Reached up, pressed a palm to Landry’s bare chest. Felt where his heart was rabbiting at the same pace Riley’s was.
Landry didn’t say anything, even though Riley kept hoping he would.
But they’d come too far now to turn back.
Riley could already taste Landry on his tongue, and whatever happened next, he was at least going to experience it for real, not just in his fevered imagination.
“Landry, people who are friends don’t want to do this to each other.”
Landry wet his lips. “Do what?”
“Oh, come on, Landry, you know.” Riley tilted his head. Felt that heartbeat quicken under his touch. Spread his palm so he could dig his fingertips into the muscle.
Landry’s gaze widened. His breath was coming even quicker now.
“I thought…” Landry took a deep breath. “I thought you and Carter…”
Riley laughed. He couldn’t help it. The sound exploded out of him. “Are you serious? Carter? Carter Maxwell? That Carter?”
“Yes.” Landry sounded annoyed. He sounded jealous.
Riley could work with that.
“Trust me, it’s not him I’m thinking about alone at night in my bed. In your bed,” Riley cooed, tilting his head up. Watching as Landry’s eyes dilated even further.
Oh yeah, he wanted him. Bad.
Well—the feeling was definitely mutual.
Mutual and inevitable, and Riley was tired of fighting it.
Maybe this had been foretold at the beginning of time.
At least from the moment that Landry had walked into his house years ago, and Riley hadn’t been able to do anything but just fucking stare at his brother’s best friend. From the moment they’d stood together in that dark club in Pittsburgh and flirted because they couldn’t help themselves.
Riley’s hand slipped up and cupped Landry’s shoulder. Dug in. Tugged him closer.
Meet me halfway, Landry. Please. I’m not alone here. I know I’m not.
“We’re friends,” Landry said firmly.
Oh God, don’t put me in the friend zone. Riley nearly said it out loud. Not you. Not now.
“But,” Landry continued wryly, “you’re right. We’re more, too. I want to be more.”
Then he dipped his head and gently, carefully pressed his mouth against Riley’s.
Sensation exploded inside Riley, and he was aware of each and every one. Landry’s dry lips. His slight hesitation. The warmth of his palm against Riley’s cheek. The way his fingers trembled.
He’s nervous, Riley realized with wonder unfolding inside him. He likes me enough it’s made him nervous. And he wanted to kiss me enough he did it anyway.
Duh, Riley realized. This is his first kiss with a guy.
So even though every instinct he possessed was screaming at him to lose himself in the kiss completely—to lose himself in Landry—he kept it polite and conservative. Tried not to push too hard. Tried not to wallow in the desire he was finally indulging in.
The ball was in Landry’s court, and Riley needed him to want it just as badly as he did.
Then Landry groaned, tilted his head, and deepened the kiss, shaking Riley’s world right off its axis.
Riley scooted closer on the barstool, wanting to get closer to Landry, even though the wooden slats of the back frustratingly kept them separated.
Landry’s mouth moved more and more confidently against Riley’s, and then he teased his lips open with his tongue, and that was game over.
Riley lost himself. Pressed his fingertips into Landry’s skin and hung onto those big, broad shoulders he wanted to see every single morning for the rest of his life.
Before, he’d felt desperate with the craving that spiked between them at so many inconvenient times. But now that desire had claws. It dug at him and worried at him, evolving until Landry was so much more than something he just wanted.
He needed.
His cock pulsed in his shorts, hard and aching, and there was a distant part of his brain that knew that wouldn’t happen tonight. Not yet. He’d practically had to coax Landry to kiss him.
Anything else was most definitely off the table.
But to his shock, he heard Landry’s frustrated groan as he tried again to get around the wooden back of the barstool forcibly separating them, and then he broke Riley’s mind apart.
He grabbed him and forcibly lifted him, removing him from the stool entirely and setting him on the edge of the counter.
Landry’s eyes were wild. Desperate.
Riley thought they probably looked a lot like his own.
For a second, they stared at each other, then Riley opened his legs and Landry fell between them, pressing against him, legs to legs, chest to chest, mouth to mouth like he was starving.
Landry was going out of his fucking mind.
He’d imagined so many times over the last few weeks what it would be like to cash in on the promises in Riley’s eyes.
But he’d never dreamt, not in a million years, that it could feel so good.
That he would be this into kissing a guy.
Kissing Riley.
Because Riley was so much more than just a guy, he was Landry’s guy.
The way Riley went loose and weak in his arms as they kissed and kissed made Landry believe that had to be true.
Riley was his, the way he’d so effortlessly become Riley’s.
“Wait.” Riley’s breath was ragged, even rougher than his voice, as he broke off.
Landry’s lungs heaved like he’d just run a marathon. He’d never felt this way. Not about anyone he’d ever kissed before. He wanted nothing more than to drag Riley upstairs to his bed and strip all his clothes off and finally get to touch and taste him the way he’d fantasized about way too many damn times.
But Riley was asking him to wait, and Landry would rather set himself on fire than do something he didn’t want.
Something he wasn’t one hundred percent ready for.
The irony, Landry thought as he tried to get his body under control. He’d thought he’d be the one worried and anxious and ultimately hesitating on taking that final step. But it turned out he was more than ready to shed the rest of his straightness and get down and dirty with a guy.
His guy.
“What?” Landry asked.
Riley pressed his fingers to his lips. They were red and swollen. Wet. From Riley’s own mouth. Landry shuddered a little.
The look in Riley’s eyes was full of wonder.
“I like you,” Riley said.
Landry laughed. Couldn’t help himself. “I like you, too. Pretty sure I already said that.”
“Sorry, my brain sort of short-circuited after you kissed me. Yes, I do remember that now. I just…” Riley hesitated. Like he was choosing his next words very carefully.
Landry didn’t enjoy that at all. He wanted to hear the truth, the whole truth, even if it was a truth he hated. He didn’t want Riley to hide anything, not from him.
“What is it? Do you not…” Of course, just because he needed to know didn’t mean this was an easy question to ask. “Do you not want to do this?”
But Riley didn’t answer. Not directly anyway. He tapped his fingertips against Landry’s lips again. Landry wanted to lick them. Suck them deep. Make Riley think of all the other ways he could use his mouth.
Convince him that way if his words alone weren’t proof of his feelings.
“You know, when we first met years ago, I had the most ridiculous crush on you.”
So Logan had been right about that. Landry was having trouble wrapping his head around that revelation, but before he could, Riley kept going.
“Just absolutely ridiculous. I’m sure you knew. I practically followed you around with hearts in my eyes.”
Landry shook his head. He hadn’t realized.
“Well,” Riley said, chuckling, “I guess that’s something because Aidan never guessed either. But then we met again last month, and—”
“And I couldn’t stop looking at you. Damn, you grew up good,” Landry said. A fucking understatement. “I didn’t know what was happening. I just knew nothing was what I’d thought it was. I wanted you, but that doesn’t mean I had any idea how to deal with it.”
“Do you now?” Riley asked, the corner of his mouth tilting up. He looked amused. And definitely hopeful.
Landry nodded, even though he didn’t replace it particularly funny. He was dead fucking serious. He’d carry Riley up to his bed right now and show him just how serious, if he’d let him.
But Riley seemed to want to talk.
Annoyingly.
“I just…I don’t want this to be something that it isn’t.”
Landry’s heart seized.
He hadn’t even realized that particular organ was the one so invested in the outcome of this conversation. He’d thought it was just his cock that craved Riley so much, but it turned out his heart had stealthily been involved from the very beginning.
“What isn’t it?”
Riley’s gaze was serious. Earnest. “I don’t want to just be an itch to scratch because you realized you’re attracted to a guy,” he said. And Landry knew, instinctually, that this was the truth.
“Is that what you think this is? Riley, it doesn’t matter what you are. A guy. A girl. Something else. Nothing else. I want you because you’re you. And what I want, it’s not even remotely close to just itch-scratching. Though…” Landry hesitated. Wondering how honest he should be. “I’m pretty ready to get started on the itch-scratching part of it.”
Riley stared at him. “You mean that.”
Landry couldn’t believe he had to convince him of this. Hadn’t they just been kissing like the world was ending only a few minutes ago? Maybe they could get back to that, maybe they could do even more…surely there was something he could do to prove it wasn’t just his cock that wanted more.
“Riley, I like you. I liked you from the moment we met again in Pittsburgh, sure, but honestly, I always liked you. We didn’t know each other well, maybe, but Aidan talked about you all the time, and I liked every bit of you that I heard about. I liked the shape of you before I got to know the parts inside. And now that I’m beginning to really know you, all those parts you don’t show to the world? I like you even more.”
Riley didn’t answer in words. Instead, he leaned in and kissed Landry this time. The way their kiss turned hot and heavy almost immediately made him think that maybe Riley really was on board with the whole finally scratching their mutual itch—after all, Landry could feel him hard and ready against his thigh, and it was so hard not to reach down and touch. Then, Riley proved it was true. Not in words.
His hand slipped down Landry’s chest, and then it was pressing, firm and warm and perfect against where his cock ached in his shorts, and Riley was definitely smiling against his mouth now.
“I see that you are ready for the itch-scratching part to begin,” Riley joked. But was it really a joke when Riley’s hand was currently on his cock? Finally?
“You have no idea,” Landry said.
Maybe someday he’d tell Riley about what he’d done alone in his bedroom—twice—since running into him in the hallway mostly naked.
“We really doing this?” Riley asked, his voice suddenly going low and uncertain.
For the first time, Landry could really see Riley had not only had that crush on him he’d admitted to, but that there was a part of him that still found Landry returning those feelings unbelievable.
“Oh, we’re doing this, baby,” Landry said and leaned in to kiss him again.
He’d meant it to be a quick, reassuring peck before they headed upstairs, but Riley’s mouth was so addictive, so lush and warm and wet and everything Landry had ever dreamed it might be and so much more that he got lost. Again.
When Riley finally broke the kiss, he was smiling. Grinning, really. Like he’d just won the lottery—or the Super Bowl.
“You keep going like that, we’re never gonna make it upstairs.”
Landry couldn’t help but nod in agreement. But the kitchen was cold and hard, and he wanted a nice big soft bed to lay Riley out on. Take his time exploring every inch of his incredible body.
“Well, then take me upstairs, big boy,” Riley cooed with a voice that would’ve melted a much tougher man. He wound his arms and legs around Landry and scooted closer.
It seemed like a very good idea, a very sexy idea, to carry Riley up the stairs.
He didn’t weigh as much as he might, Landry thought with a pulse of concern echoing so many of the arguments Aidan had made, or else he was just way too full of adrenaline to notice the weight of him in his arms.
He did notice the way Riley attached his mouth to Landry’s neck and his hand to his cock. Couldn’t help but notice.
Couldn’t help but be incredibly distracted by it. So distracted he nearly tripped on the first stair heading up.
“Riley,” he said with pseudo-sternness. “I’m gonna drop you.”
“No, you won’t,” Riley teased. “You got me. I promise.”
“Shouldn’t I be promising you?”
Riley’s fingers did something clever and so pleasurable against his cloth-covered dick that he nearly stumbled on the third step. And then they were delving under the waistband of his shorts, and God, that was Riley’s touch. Skin to skin. Teasing and stroking, and it felt so goddamn good, Landry could barely handle it.
He pushed Riley’s back against the staircase wall and kissed him.
His tongue in Riley’s mouth, and Riley’s hand on his cock. The pleasure pulsed through him, cycled round and round until he felt dizzy with it.
Weak with it.
Landry maintained he did not drop Riley. He wouldn’t do that.
But Riley did slide bonelessly to the bottom of the staircase, laughing the whole way, and then he wasn’t laughing anymore. Because Landry was on him, kissing him again, his hands shaking as he yanked down Riley’s shorts.
“Jesus,” he moaned under his breath as Riley’s incredible body was revealed to him.
It was everything he’d dreamed of a few nights ago, and more.
He wanted to take his time. He wanted to not be on this hard, wooden staircase.
But moving was overrated, especially because of the way Riley looked, and felt, and was.
In the end, nothing mattered except Riley’s cock, flushed pink like the rest of him, and the way he shook when Landry finally reached out and touched it.
“More,” Riley demanded greedily, and Landry wasn’t prepared to deny him.
Or himself, either, as Riley reached up and grabbed his shorts, pulling them down.
“If I’d known—” Riley panted as Landry’s hand began to move with more and more certainty—he’d worried this would be weird, but it was only weird because of how natural it felt, making Riley squirm—“that you’d be so good at this, I’d never have let you leave the other night.”
His eyes were a glorious blue, blurry with pleasure. Pleasure Landry was giving him. That was a high he’d never imagined he’d crave, but now he couldn’t get enough of. He curled his hand around Riley’s cock, and stroked him harder. Wanted to feel every inch of him, every quiver, every reaction.
Felt Riley do the same until it was just one endless circuit of pleasure, back and forth. Landry was aware his mouth was open, and he was probably staring uncomprehendingly at Riley’s face.
Wondering: how did we get here?
Also wondering: how can we get back here as soon as possible?
He was twitching and leaking into Riley’s palm, and then he leaned down and kissed him. Riley moaned into his mouth and bit his tongue just a little, and Landry was gone.
Riley strung out his orgasm, stroking him through it with alternating gentle and rough touches, teasing him and satisfying him in a way Landry hadn’t ever imagined. He refused to focus on how amazing it felt, though, with his hand still working Riley’s cock. He hadn’t expected Riley would be close, but then, surprisingly, he jerked and froze as his head fell back, bliss creeping across his face as he pulsed into Landry’s hand.
Like Landry’s orgasm had pushed Riley into his own, and God, that was hot as hell.
“Shit,” Riley groaned. “God, you are good at that.”
Landry laughed. How could he do anything else? They hadn’t even made it up the stairs. He’d half-dropped, half-collapsed with Riley in his arms because it had been way too fucking much to even deal with.
With his other hand, he stripped off his shirt and wiped both their palms dry.
“Didn’t think I would be?” Landry asked when they were both—relatively—clean.
Riley had settled against the stairs like it was his throne. And as far as Landry was concerned, maybe it was.
He’d be happy to sit here at his feet and worship Riley forever.
“Well, you weren’t exactly experienced.”
“What I don’t have in experience, I’m definitely going to make up with enthusiasm,” Landry promised.
Riley grinned back. “Yeah? That your way of promising that the first and last time we have sex won’t be on a wooden staircase?”
“Yes,” Landry said, nodding seriously. “Next time, I genuinely hope to make it to the bedroom.”
“Well, I guess that’s one room down,” Riley teased.
“One room down?”
Riley leaned in and kissed him, a brief peck on the lips. Landry nearly chased him back and kissed him harder, deeper. Couldn’t get enough of him, honestly. “We’ve christened one room in this house,” he said seriously. “One down, the rest to go.”
It was only when they dragged their aching bodies off the staircase that Landry realized a basic quandary.
Because they hadn’t made it to the bed, he couldn’t suggest Riley stay with him.
As a result, he wouldn’t be able to roll over the next morning and see him in all that gorgeous dawn light. Might not be able to wake him in the middle of the night because he hadn’t gotten enough—didn’t know if he could ever get enough.
That was sobering and a little bit terrifying, but Landry was going with it.
What else could he do?
“So,” Riley said, leaning closer, eyes sparkling as he gazed up at Landry, “what now?”
They shouldn’t be awkward anymore. Hadn’t they just opened up the front door and booted any awkwardness out unceremoniously? Yes, they had.
Landry could hear Logan’s voice in his head. Just tell him. It’s a classic for a reason. “I kinda hoped we could…uh…” His nerves failed him at the last moment. Landry cleared his throat. “We could go to bed together.”
“Didn’t we do that already?” Riley asked, but his eyes weren’t just knowing; they were practically twinkling.
Heart-eyes, Landry realized. That’s how Riley looks at you. It’s how he’s always looked at you.
He realized then that, yes, Riley had definitely had a crush on him. Even though Riley had confessed to this less than an hour ago, Landry believed it now.
Could see the seeds of it going back years and years.
Maybe they’d always been heading here.
“We went to the staircase,” Landry teased. “Not the same thing.”
“You’re a cuddler, aren’t you? I’m going to sell out to ESPN, and the first thing I’m going to tell them is what a big cuddle monster you are.”
“Except you’d have to tell them you love it, too,” Landry said, the look on Riley’s face—hopeful and a little bit awestruck—bolstering his conviction.
“Yeah,” Riley said. “You go. I’ll be up in a minute.”
Landry raised an eyebrow.
“And no,” Riley added, “this isn’t me brushing you off.”
“If you don’t want to sleep together, we don’t have to. I know having your own space can be important.” Landry wanted Riley to have choices, even though they were technically living together already.
Riley shot him an impatient look. “You’re fine. I’ve only wanted to cuddle with you for almost half my life.”
“Oh. Oh.”
“Right.” Riley smiled. Whacked him lightly on the butt. “I said I’d be up soon, and I will be. Have to do something first.”
“Tell Aidan to fuck off?”
Riley chuckled but didn’t answer. Which, Landry supposed, as he headed up the stairs towards his bedroom, was answer enough.
He got ready for bed. Brushed his teeth again. Plumped his pillows. Put his gym bag in the closet and his dirty socks in the hamper. Set his phone on the charger. Then had a long-ish debate with himself over which side of the bed Riley was going to want.
You don’t give a shit which side he takes, as long as he’s there, Landry reminded himself as he finally settled in.
A minute later, Riley appeared in the doorway.
He stripped off his tank top and tossed it on the side table so carelessly that Landry wished he hadn’t spent the last ten minutes agonizing over whether his socks were in the hamper or on the floor.
“Is this…is that side okay?” Landry hated himself for how much he kept hesitating, for how much he kept stammering.
Riley likes you, too, he reminded himself.
“It’s cute you think a side matters,” Riley teased as he slid into bed next to Landry. “I guarantee by the time you wake up, we’re gonna be sharing whichever side you’re on.”
Landry couldn’t think of anything he’d like better—which was strange because, in the past, he’d always wanted his own space. Hookups and the one girlfriend he’d had since college rarely stayed the night with him, usually by his choice.
But he couldn’t wait to get Riley close.
Riley-sexual, that voice—that reminded him so much of Logan—pointed out with a dry chuckle. Maybe he was because Riley was the exception to so many of his rules.
“Come ‘ere,” he said and lifted his arm, and Riley slid closer, right into the spot he’d made.
A spot he fit perfectly in.
Landry shifted slightly, turning the light off.
“I deleted that email,” Riley said, after a moment, into the darkness. “Without reading it. I didn’t need his voice in my head telling me I was stupid. I know it already.”
Landry wasn’t sure what to say. Maybe it wasn’t his business to get between Riley and Aidan, but Riley’s reaction to Aidan’s bullshit was because it hurt him, and what hurt Riley hurt Landry. But he wasn’t stupid enough to think Riley deleting one email was enough to solve all the problems between them.
“I’m sure he didn’t say you were stupid. We won,” Landry reminded him.
“Yeah, but he’s not used to having a brother who’s a sports media laughingstock,” Riley said wryly.
“Nobody thinks of you like that,” Landry argued.
“Yeah,” Riley said quietly.
Landry realized this wasn’t the kind of problem he could fix with a timely pep talk. To believe, Riley was going to need more proof to the contrary—and even more than that, he was going to need time to get over it.
It was still too fresh in everyone’s eyes.
In the meantime, Landry could just be there for him.
“Well, I’m proud of you for not letting Overprotective Brother Bot activate,” Landry said.
Riley chuckled. “Thanks.” He yawned. “I think…”
“Yeah,” Landry echoed and found himself, arms full of the warmth of Riley, drifting off to sleep.
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