The Stars are Dying : (Nytefall: Book 1) -
The Stars are Dying: Chapter 14
Time became incomprehensible. Irrelevant. My thoughts left me empty-minded, but I didn’t stop moving. I knew it had been daylight, but now darkness was falling again. I didn’t care if it cloaked me. Smothered me. I knew the moment any real feeling came back I was sure to want it.
The final darkness.
I only noticed the rain when walking became heavier. When loose strands of my hair clung to my face and I was shivering violently.
Eventually I stopped moving. I looked down at my dagger. The dark blood had mostly been washed off with the rain, but the flecks that remained made the scene replay in my head with punishing clarity. Flashes that stole my vision, my breath. I leaned over on my knees, sheathing the blade and trying to replace the ground when it began to drift away.
“You didn’t deserve that.”
Only when I heard Nyte’s voice did I remember my heart still held a beat. He eased out from the trees like a shadow.
“Me?” I breathed incredulously. “You’re right. I deserve to be the one without this miserable life instead.”
What surged inside me was the instinct I’d allowed to be suppressed by his enchantment. Fear. Fresh in the wake of Cassia’s death. But he… Surely he wasn’t a blood vampire when I’d watched his shadow follow him. Though I couldn’t rule out the possibility he was a soul vampire with no reflection to check. Or perhaps he was a fae who also answered to the king.
It didn’t matter what he was.
A seething anger rose within me. All I could replay was the kiss of death one of his kind had bestowed on Cassia. All I could see was this creature before me who was capable of it too.
Nyte edged toward me, and while my mind screamed to run, I tried to rally even a fraction of the bravery Cassia would have felt.
Nothing to lose. I had nothing left to lose.
He took another step, and this time my fear shook over the anger.
“Stay back.”
“Astraea.”
I blinked at that, turning the word over in my mind, but I wasn’t so confused in my grief as to be mistaken. “I never told you my name,” I whispered. “You’ve been following me all this time. Did you kill her? Send him to kill her…?” My next breath came like a spear in my gut. “Was it supposed to be me?”
“I had nothing to do with your friend’s death.”
Death.
That word would never fail to slam into me with the force of the world caving in. My mind reeled. I couldn’t believe him. I didn’t want to believe him, but my thoughts waged war. I wanted to try to let rage consume me enough to fight him, but my heart was aching so badly it was already a lost battle.
Nyte took another step, and I did the only thing I knew I could.
I ran.
My hands gripped my skirts as I pushed my legs faster than I’d ever run before. Tears streamed past my temples and adrenaline pulsed hot with the chase, though my mind taunted it would be over in a heartbeat. I was a lamb caught in a lion’s game, a fool for even existing in this world I could not survive in. And no longer did I want to when Cassia was my only fight, and she was gone.
I flew through the woods as the light rain turned to snowfall, hoping my lungs that caught fire could end my suffering before another creature had the satisfaction of taking my life. Ahead the woods opened, and I spied the icy sheet. A frozen lake. But while the bitter temperature stung my cheeks, I couldn’t be certain it was so cold to have frozen the water thick enough to withstand my weight.
“Astraea, stop.”
I shook my head as if it would expel his voice. I didn’t slow, focusing instead on blocking him from being able to reach into my mind. Breaking past the trees, I threw all sense away, pushing on against the basic survival instinct that screamed the ice was too thin.
“STOP!”
Nyte’s tone spiked a rattling fear that almost made me falter. My first step onto the lake confirmed the probability it would break before I reached the other side. The splintering of ice rang in my senses, the same sound I’d match to a thin arrow cutting the air. It played over and over, and there was a certain melody to it, picking up speed as a crescendo before the ice broke.
In the exact moment I knew I was awaiting the end I found peace. I stopped running. Looking down to watch the ice fragment, I found myself staring at the reflection of all I was within. Splintered.
The slow echo of the cracking ice became a countdown only the lake could measure.
“Don’t move.” Nyte’s breath sounded labored. Not with exertion but worry. “I can’t save you here.”
I’m not hoping to be saved.
I didn’t tell him that. Something in his tone made me believe it would hurt to hear. My shoulder blades locked, not expecting him to be so close behind me, and the thought of the ice breaking to take him too… His reckless chase to condemn himself shouldn’t be my concern, yet it was the only thing that stung me with regret.
I shifted my foot back, only wanting to see one last face…
The ice split beneath me before I got that chance, and black water swallowed me in an instant.
Never before had I been gripped so wholly and suddenly. Clutched tightly in the arms of a frozen death, the pain that shot over every inch of me was quickly numbed by shock. As I drifted, the current pulled so strong that even if I tried to swim I wouldn’t break through the ice above me. I had no will to try as I gave up. My eyes fluttered open to glimpse their last view. All was dark with blurred streaks of light, and there was a wondrous beauty to it.
I blinked around hazy flecks of color until a shadow grew. Then a flare of gold illuminated, reaching for a bright silver, and I wondered if any of it was me while my arms drifted above the rest of my body.
Something hit me, slamming into me before holding me tight, and if I weren’t so weak I would’ve wrapped my arms around it. But my body was pulled by a greater force as I began to shut down.
Gravity claimed me mercilessly. I wished to be floating, but instead I was weighted and heavy, crushed by the force of nature but still drowning when the breezy air didn’t fill my lungs. Pressure beat in agonizing pulses on my chest. Then the first sensation of something warm on my lips jolted me awake like lightning, making my eyes fly open.
I coughed, spluttering water, and the punishing grip of ice shook me violently. I was held tight against it, panting heavily, and droplets of water fell to my skin.
I couldn’t grasp full consciousness, but I could vaguely make out my body being pulled. Some weight fell away. My cloak. Then my arms were peeled from their sleeves. When laces were pulled over my breasts I felt my protest rise, but I was too weak to voice it.
“You won’t get to hate me for this if you’re dead.”
Nyte was here. In my agony I was glad not to be alone. Thought this was the second time I thought I’d heard the wavering of his composure. There was a new clarity to his voice, as though anything I’d heard from him before was only an echo of reality compared to now.
My teeth bashed together, and when my under corset came off, leaving me in only my sleeveless chemise, I was pulled into a hard form. He was so warm. It was as if it was the first time I’d felt it, the heat from him so inviting I turned into it far too eagerly. My cheek met skin and I breathed in faint notes of mint.
“Nyte,” I whispered, replaceing those eyes of dawn that came in and out of focus.
His palm cupped my cheek, returning the warmth to it, and I shuddered. “I’ve got you.”
“You should have let me go.”
His jaw shifted. Every light within me started to wink out. But as I watched shadows circle my vision, Nyte stayed with me under the slow blanket of stars. I wanted to admire its beauty for longer, but as my body felt pulled by something…unexplainable, all I could do was press myself tighter to his solid bare chest, not wanting the void to drift us apart and leave me alone again.
“This is not the way you die. Stay with me a while longer.”
Gravity returned again, though I wished to be free, flying, anywhere I might evade the tether to this world that was slowly wrapping around me.
Except for him. I wanted him.
“You’re warm,” I mumbled, unable to stop thinking this was new. He’d touched me before, but this time I couldn’t place my craving for it.
“I wish I could say the same for you.” His voice sounded strained as he carried me, and I was about to tell him to let me go. “It’s nothing to do with you,” he said in answer to my thoughts.
His exertion had to be because of me.
Nyte stopped walking, taking a moment to breathe, and I fluttered my heavy eyes to his face. He was so beautiful, with his midnight hair slicked around his sharp features. Droplets of water rolled down his complexion, pale as if it had been far too long since he’d felt the sun. Something about his face was different. More troubled and worn and tired.
“Nyte,” I said though my chattering teeth.
“Starlight,” he breathed back.
“I’m glad that room wasn’t empty.”
The confession slipped out as I thought I might not have another chance. I realized I’d run from him, but I wasn’t truly afraid of him. I was afraid of living after all I’d failed at and lost, and I was hopeful for this to be the end so Cassia wouldn’t be waiting long for me.
My palm flattened on Nyte’s chest to feel his deep inhale. Then he was moving again, holding me closer, and my lids slipped shut as I forgot the wrongness of my wanting this final comfort before then.
“I plan to have you dance for me a second time.”
I shook my head—or I thought I did, but a wave of drowsiness lapped at me, and my hand fell limp.
“Stay awake, Astraea.”
My head became a boulder atop my shoulders, toppling off until it was jerked back and rolled to replace balance. My forehead was now pressed into his neck with the adjustment, sending me off with notes of mint and sandalwood, and I decided this was a peaceful scent to die with. This felt safe despite what he might be.
“Had you ever danced for anyone before?” Nyte didn’t sound in a healthy form to talk either, but I enjoyed the rough surety of his voice and the way I could feel its vibrations. It felt…different than any other time he’d spoken. So certain and promising when it should have been the opposite with my senses barely-there.
“Would you be jealous if I said yes?”
He chuckled, the sound light and staggered with exertion. It was enough to tug at my mouth, but not to open my eyes. “To a dangerous degree.”
My slowing heart skipped a beat. “I’d never danced for anyone before,” I whispered.
The cold became so unbearable I wished it gone in my whimper. Despite enjoying the firm grasp of Nyte’s arms, I wished he hadn’t come.
“Just a little farther,” he said with a plea I almost nodded to.
I could make out the distant crack of branches and a rustling I confused with the rush of water I’d been engulfed in. Until the breaking stopped and so did his movements—save for his chest, which rose and fell deeply. He collapsed to his knees, relaxing his arms, but I didn’t want him to let me go.
“We’re out of time,” he said, sliding a palm across my cheek. “You’re going to be just fine.”
I wasn’t fine. I never had been and never would be even close to the bare minimum it took to exist without the world caving in on me with every step. Fine. Nyte had become this beautiful, impossible, taunting distraction I’d thought I wanted to chase away, but now I feared he was all I had left.
“Please.”
I wasn’t sure if the word had truly escaped my lips or why I’d really spoken it when darkness swept my mind and the shadows slammed down heavy. Before I succumbed to the numbness offered by the torture, a feminine voice sounded above the water.
As Nyte, the only sure thing I knew in that moment, slipped away from me…
I slipped away to nothing.
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