The Werewolf King’s Runaway Queen
Chapter 65

Alissa's POV

I sat at the edge as I looked at the deep fall below.

The sun is high up in the sky and everybody else is in the cabin resting after a long trip back.

My mind was wondering around everywhere and I hate it.

I hate it that even in Sol, I was thinking of him.

I wad thinking of the person who keeps hurting me over and over again.

I hate that no matter what he does, I can't seem to despise him.

I hate that this stupid mate bond is so strong and that I'm constantly giving into it.

I hate that he actually cares.

I hate that he pretends he doesn't.

I hate it.

I hate it so much that I want to go back, talk to him and fix our relationship.

A tear fell from my eye and I wiped it with frustration.

I don't understand Luke.

He always goes out his way to piss me off, make me angry and start a fight but then he also goes out of his way to do things for me without me knowing.

He sends out royal guards to protect my old pack, renovated my cabin to make it more comfortable, provides for the pups in the school I used to teach and many more.

I don't understand why he's doing all of this but always end up giving me a headache.

Maybe it's not because of me?

Maybe because Luke just has a sense of responsibility to the people?

Maybe it's that?

Luke is an amazing King but I can't say anything about him as a partner.

Sometimes he's good.

Most times he's not.

But then again, I'm not the perfect partner as well.

I'm very resistant and stubborn.

I sighed and pulled my hair in frustration.

"Arghhh!" I pulled my hair but felt a hand quickly hold it.

I looked up and saw the Alpha.

My eyes widened a little.

"Alpha" I said.

"Don't rip all your off now. The royalties wouldn't be too happy to know you became bald here" he said with a chuckle.

I chuckled as well and the Alpha carefully fixed the top of my hair.

"What's on your mind? It seems like it isn't too good seeing how frustrated you are that you want rip your hair off" he asked and sat beside me.

I sighed as I looked in front.

I'm comfortable enough with the Alpha to open up to him.

For some time when I was here, he was like a father figure to me while the Luna was a mother figure and Enzo being a brother to me.

They were family and they always will be to me.

"I'm not sure how things are working out for his highness and I, Alpha" I said.

"We fight more times than when we're in good terms. And it's not just his fault. Mine too" I admitted.

"I replace a hard time opening up to him and when I do, he does something that drags us both back to 0 progress" I ranted.

"Luke and I never had a good relationship in the past but I do want to fix our relationship now. Except it's nit easy pretending that he didn't almost kill us both when we were teenagers or that he didn't basically force me back to the Palace or left me waiting hours for on our wedding day" I huffed.

The Alpha gave me a pat on the back.

"Sometimes it's hard to make an actual relationship with your mate. For others, it's even worse than others" he said.

"Not all mate bonds are perfect from the start. Sometimes it even perfect even through it or at the end of it" he said.

"We were always made to believe that it is because the moon goddess picked them out for us but in reality, we're the only ones who make our relationships worth it" he continued.

The Alpha looked at me straight in the eyes.

"You're an amazing young woman, Alissa. I have known that ever since I met you. Any wolf would be lucky to have you" he told me.

"It's okay to only slowly open up to your mate. After all, you guys went through a rough past with one another but do understand that tge fear and doubt you're feeling could also be something that your mate is feeling given your history with each other. And like you, he too must be trying to make things work although it difficult" the Alpha said.

I bit my lower lip and looked down as I teared up.

The Alpha caressed my back.

"If it makes you feel any better, I know someone who has an incredibly complicated relationship with their mate as well" he suddenly said.

"Really?" I asked.

The Alpha nodded.

"My older brother and his mate" he said.

I knew the Alpha had a brother but it was a first to hear a story about him from the Alpha himself.

"My brother had a female Alpha for a mate. When they met each other, they were both in a very complicated spot because my brother's mate didn't want to leave her pack nor step down as Alpha. My brother was an Alpha himself so you can imagine how that went" the Alpha sais with a chuckle.

"They argued, fought and got into each other's nerves 24/7. My brother's mate wanted to initiate a rejection but my brother refused strongly. That didn't make it easier for both of them" he continued.

"Days became weeks and weeks became months that they had such an unstable relationship. In the end, they found a way and they both led their packs together making it one" he said. I smiled.

"That's amazing. How are they now, Alpha?" I asked curiously.

"My brother died a few years ago trying to save their pack from a rogue attack. But my sister in law and my nephew are okay" he said with a small smile.

"I'm sorry" I immediately said.

The Alpha gave me a smile and a pat on the back.

But then I realized the ending of the story.

It wasn't a happy ending after all.

And that. That only made my over thinking worse.

"Alissa" the Alpha called my name.

"Yes?" I replied.

"Can I ask you something?" he said.

I nodded.

"Of course, Alpha" I said.

He looked at me..

"Do you have doubts about your mate? About your bond and the relationship you both have?" he asked.

I bit my lower lip.

"Is it bad if I say yes?" I said.

The Alpha chuckled.

"Of course not" he said.

I sighed and nodded.

"I do. I have so many doubts about Luke. About me as his mate. About our bond. About our marriage. About us in general" I told him honestly.

The Alpha nodded.

I sighed.

"It's just so hard, Alpha. It's so hard to understand my mate. I'm supposed to have a connection with him. We're supposed to have a connection with each other but I just...I don't feel it. It's like he's so near yet so far" I said. The Alpha looked.

"Do you have a clue why you feek this way?" he asked.

I shook my head.

"Do you want to know why I think you feel this way?" he asked.

I bit my lower lip then I nodded.

"I think you're both afraid" he said.

I looked at the Alpha curiously.

What does he mean by that exactly?

"You're both afraid of letting this all progress to the point that you're both in too deep and then end up hurting each other more than ever" he said.

"You're both afraid of eventually falling in love with each other and suddenly breaking each other's heart" he continued.

"You mentioned that you guy didn't have a good relationship in the past. You must both constantly look back to it and whenever you guys do, it doesn't end well" he told me.

"What you guys probably don't realize is the people you were then aren't the people you are now" he said.

"Alissa, I think you're an amazing young woman. You're kind, smart, brave, strong, fearless, loving and selfless. As an individual, you're great" he told me.

I slightly smiled.

"Now, I might not be well acquainted with your mate but I can tell a thing or two after meeting him a few times" he said.

"He's a good guy. He cares for you and and he cares for the people who are around you. I'm going to be honest, I was pretty surprised by that" he told me. "Anyways, I think as an individual, your mate is pretty impressive as well" he said.

"It's just that the problem lies in how you guys communicate. You're both amazing individuals" he continued.

"I think you guys are so good as individuals that you both got used to being just individuals and now, you guys are together and you both have individual preferences and individual opinions and individual beliefs" he said. "If only you guys can replace a way to unite with each other, maybe you'll realize, it isn't that bad after all" he told me. I sighed as I bit my lower lip and looked.

Is that really what we should do?