The Wolf Esprit: Lykanos Chronicles 3
Chapter Three

When I descended from the stage, the play’s final applause rang in my ears and I felt like I was floating.

I’d done it. I‘d made the old and common play become beautiful and inspiring, so much so that it felt like it was new. More so, I’d conquered all my fears to make it happen. The moment felt uniquely mine, and so fulfilling was this sensation that I heard only a few of the troupe’s congratulations. Nor did I feel the encouraging slaps on my back when I moved through the next group of performers who waited to take to the stage.

My mother pushed through when the narrow space emptied and gave way. She took me into her arms to kiss my face.

“That was perfect,” she whispered in my ear.

I could only smile in response, too delighted in the moment to feel embarrassed.

“Go gather your viol and join the other players.”

I nodded and made my way through to the backstage tent. It wasn’t until the instrument was in my hand that I realized my bladder was near to bursting. In my exhilaration, I’d given it no notice. But as my euphoria settled, I realized I wouldn’t make it through to the end of the show.

I rushed out of the tent and passed through the length of the camp to replace the spot against the town wall where we’d designated a communal urinal. There was no one around to consider. All but the sole camp guard on duty, Anton, were at the front near the stage, working to support the ongoing performance.

I placed the viol on the grass behind my feet and unfastened my breeches as quickly as I could. With a deep exhale, I relaxed and released my burden.

“That’s the one,” said a man’s voice from a distance.

I didn’t acknowledge it at first, but then other voices joined in and I realized that five young men were converging on where I stood.

With an instinctive and painful clench, I stopped urinating and fumbled to fasten my breeches.

“Hey, traveler? You don’t like girls? You want a man instead? Come over here and drain my cock.”

Attempting to flee, I stumbled and tripped over my viol to land on the grass. Before I could scramble back to my feet, I felt one of their shoes kick me in the stomach. The sharp blow overtook me and I couldn’t expand my lungs to draw breath.

“Where are you going, faggot? Don’t run away. I’ve got something you’ll like. You’ve probably never had one as big as this before. Then again, you’ve got that pretty face, so maybe you’ve had too many to remember.”

I opened my eyes only long enough to see the back of my viol slam against my face. The pain was blinding. I writhed on the ground and soon lost time.

Their insults and condemnations, accented by whistles and catcalls, echoed somewhere in the back of my mind. Warm water rained on my face, drawing my focus back in slow waves. It wasn’t until the water filled my slack mouth that I realized it was their piss.

I spat it out with an involuntary cough and gasped for air.

“Oh!” they screamed with laughter at me, though they didn’t stop. I felt their piss soak through the back of my doublet and breeches.

From a distance, I heard Anton’s heavy footfall approaching. He threatened the young men to stand away from me or he would cut them with his knife.

“Filthy traveler! Come here and I’ll break your fucking neck.”

I saw none of the struggle that ensued, but I felt Anton’s body on the ground beside before someone spat at me.

“Stay the fuck away from here, sodomite.”

Moments later, unconsciousness took me.

“This is your fault! You and Guillaume and your nonsense,” Father said. “The magistrate wouldn’t even listen to our grievances. He outright said the town’s citizens were in their right to defend themselves from sodomites and their untoward advances.”

“That isn’t what happened,” Mother protested. “Those ruffians cornered your son while the camp was unsecured and nearly beat him to death! They were jealous—nothing more than simple cowards. They cat-called him from the back while all the young women in the audience were swooning over Romeo. Can’t you understand what this is about? Those idiots fear us. They detest any travelers, even if we’re not Roma. That’s why they won’t let us sleep in the town. And that’s why they attacked Esprit and Anton. You go on about your nonsense when the truth is so plain—

Father slapped Mother’s face to silence her.

I tried to get to my feet, but he push me back onto the bed to stop me.

“Stay down, you fool,” he hissed with impatience. “I’ve had enough of you.”

My body trembled at the sight of his violence and, for a moment, I didn’t feel the terrible soreness in my face.

“Anton may die of his wounds,” he said to Mother with a dark whisper. “Do you understand, woman? You give these people reason to despise us even more by letting your son preen about the stage. And for what? You’re lucky all he lost was his instrument. His face will recover. Hopefully, when it does, he won’t look so much like a girl in a man’s breeches.”

With that, Father left the tent to tend to his morning duties.

“All you all right?” I called to Mother.

With her back to me, she let out a sigh.

“He doesn’t mean to hurt you,” she said. “But you’re not a child any longer. It’s time you took your life more seriously. It’s time you act like a man.”

She looked at me with pained eyes before heading to her own duties.

I lay my head back on my pillow and shut my eyes, unwilling to believe she’d said those to me or face their meaning.

Something was ahead of me, drawing me with an indefinable resonance that whispered through the thick of trees. It challenged me like an itch I couldn’t scratch, and my search became anxious as I pushed faster along the damp forest floor.

On my right, a pocket of bright light caught my eyes. The wide shaft gleamed there in an opening just past a few trunks of timber, and I abandoned my search to advance upon it. In moments, I stepped into a clearing and raised my eyes to replace the moon soaring above. I almost retreated at the sight of it, gleaming in Heaven with such indescribable beauty that I became unsure of myself. For a moment, I felt certain She would steal me away; lift my body from the wet earth and raise me to Her. So overcome by the sight, the approaching sound didn’t register in my mind until it was but ten feet away.

I shot around and squinted into the dark of the surrounding trees, desperate to replace the source of the indefinable sound. My eyes scanned in vain for anything, and I blinked wildly to compensate for the moon’s ghost image left burned in my sight.

From my right, the snap of a twig startled me. From my left, the flap of a bird’s wings almost caused me to stumble. I realized whatever approached now surrounded me on all sides, and the sensation terrified me.

“Who goes there?” I shouted, standing as tall as I could in the moonlight. “Show yourself!”

When no answer came, I inhaled to repeat myself. Instead, my lungs locked at the sound of an indecipherable whisper behind me. I shot around but saw no one there either. At the echo of another whisper on my right, I released my breath and almost choked. In a frenzy, I searched the ground for a stick or rock—anything I might take in hand as a weapon.

Another whisper came from my left, and I realized someone had said my name.

“Esprit,” a voice said under their breath.

And again.

And again.

A malevolent chorus of whispers rose from the surrounding forest black, each with my name on their lips. Their volume advanced and retracted over one another like echoes in water. The sound undulated for moments before raising to a mild roar, “Esprit!!”

At once, the voices stopped to leave me alone with nothing but my breath and racing heartbeat to break the untenable silence.

Above my head, the moon’s light dimmed because of thick, passing clouds that moved to all but obscure it.

Fallen into darkness, my vulnerability felt so harrowing that I couldn’t speak. I knew if they wanted, they could take me, and I might not see them until their hands were upon me.

A few paces ahead, I caught the unexpected flicker of candlelight, but it disappeared before my eyes could focus. Before I could think, there were two lights, and I recognized they were not candles but the refracted light in a predator’s eyes. I couldn’t be certain, but at its distance, I perceived the animal must be massive. It stared at me with unmasked anger, and by the deep growl from its lungs, I felt sure it would charge me.

Instead, it closed its eyes and left me alone in the dark.

From behind, someone seized my arms, and I screamed. No matter what I did, I couldn’t break free from their iron grip. In time, exhausted by my own fruitless struggle, I stopped trying to escape and fell into uncontrollable sobbing.

In moments, his grip slackened.

“Don’t be afraid,” my dark captor whispered in my ear. “I’m here with you.”