McMonster: Good night?

oBITCHuary: Hmm, I don’t recall you ever contacting me in the middle of the night before. Has it been a good night for YOU?

McMonster: It’s actually been an epic shit show.

oBITCHuary: Anything I can do to help?

McMonster: Yes. Let me tell you what I need to tell you.

oBITCHuary: Other than that. I really want to stay friends. I don’t have many. And I’m still on probation with my childhood BFF.

McMonster: My, my, you can be selfish when you want.

oBITCHuary: Only with you.

McMonster: That’s all right.

oBITCHuary: Why?

McMonster: Because you’re the only person I’m selfless with too.

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