Twilight of the Gods
Chapter 37: Mothers' Love

Queen Alexandra was a vision to behold on her wedding day.

Her warm, sunkissed skin glowed in her pale blue gown, accentuated by simple sparkling pearl jewelry. Tropical blue flowers were woven into her long, inky black hair, which she had chosen to wear loosely, showing off her wavy locks.

This was also how the spirit of Daeva’s biological mother chose to appear when summoned by Nyx.

“You’ve changed so much,” she said, wrapping her arms around Daeva in a warm embrace. “I’m sorry you had to suffer through this life without me.”

Daeva stood there awkwardly, letting Alexandra hug her. She wasn’t sure what she should do with her hands, wondering if she needed to hug the woman back. She just wasn’t used to having a mother.

“It’s not your fault,” she replied. “There wasn’t anything you could do to prevent everything that happened to me.”

“Death claimed her too early,” Nyx added. “She died when you were twelve in your first life.”

Alexandra’s arms around her tightened. “My visions drove me mad and into an early grave. I had to watch you weep over me and be unable to do anything about it. My sweet, precious Evelyn. If I were alive, I would’ve joined your stepmother in telling you to never run away with that awful boy.”

Daeva pulled away. “Haydn isn’t that awful.”

Alexandra brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. “Cordelia warned me that it would be difficult to convince you. Maybe it’s time that we bring her in.”

“After you tell your story,” Nyx said. “I think she needs to understand her role in facilitating humanity’s greatness.”

Humanity’s greatness, she thought. What a joke. They can’t be serious.

“Of course,” Alexandra said. “How could I forget? When I was younger, I was plagued with visions of a girl who looked just like me dying at the hands of a dark-haired man. I thought these visions were trying to warn me of your father, who sought my hand. But the girl in these visions wore a lilac dress, a color I despised. When I gave birth to you and saw that you loved the purple flowers in the castle gardens, I realized those visions were about you.”

Tears glimmered in the Queen’s eyes. “I did everything in my power to stop that future from happening. I even asked your father to banish all of the dark-haired boys from the kingdom. For a while, that seemed to work. I began to see new visions, one where you became a great conqueror that united all of the five islands into one great country. I even found other seers who saw the same thing. Many strands of fate were destined to intersect when you finally came of age. You were going to change the world. It’s too bad I died before I could see it.”

The memory hits Daeva with full force and all of a sudden, she’s twelve again, kneeling by her mother’s grave and clutching the stems of a handful of blue flowers. She managed to stay composed during the funeral procession, but since all of the guests left, she was free to cry alone. Even so, she kept her sobs quiet. Princesses, after all, did not make a scene.

She returns to reality, looking at her mother with new eyes.

“Was there any chance you could have lived longer? Maybe for an extra year?”

Alexandra shook her head. “Given the nature of my gift, I should have never lived that long. Seers rarely make it to adulthood. Most of my life was spent in pain.”

“Unfortunate,” Nyx said. “Someone as gifted as you should have been granted a more carefree existence. But there’s someone else that would like to meet you, Daeva. She’s waited a long time to see you again.”

Queen Cordelia materializes before the three, clad in a long-sleeve, tight-fitted dress made of shiny silver scales. Her flowy auburn locks were pulled back into a tight bun, giving all the attention to her large, stormy gray eyes. She had a more severe appearance than Queen Alexandra, with her sharp cheekbones contrasting against the previous mother’s soft, round face.

Daeva personally thought that her stepmother looked more regal.

“You look different,” Cordelia said, taking Daeva’s hands into hers. “Since when did you get red hair? We actually look related.”

You can thank Ezra, she thought. He had a fetish for red-headed women when he experimented on me.

But she didn’t tell that to her. Instead, she gave some vague responses about the traumas of her second life changing her.

Cordelia looked skeptical of her explanation. “I’m not fond of your new appearance,” she admitted. She smooths Daeva’s hair, kissing her forehead. Instantly, a glamour washes over her, transforming her into Evelyn.

She briefly peers at her appearance in a mirror, making note of her dark curly hair and warm brown eyes, both of which mirrored Queen Alexandra’s features. She had been quite pretty in her first life. There was a sparkling innocence on her face, one of a girl who didn’t suffer the way she did.

If only I had stayed that way, she thought wistfully. If only I could’ve been sheltered in the embrace of my two mothers forever.

“That’s the woman I raised,” Cordelia said, satisfied with her work. Alexandra nodded in approval, her eyes sparkling with tears again. Daeva almost wanted to cry with her, but she could tell by Cordelia’s serious expression that there were more important matters at hand.

“Alexandra told you that you were destined to unite the Myranian continent. Is that correct?”

“Yes.”

“That was fully set into motion when Anhel chose you. Your father and I were so proud of what you accomplished. The other royal families didn’t have a God nearly as powerful on their side. The sheer political advantage that we gained when you became a Chosen One was unbelievable. But we were blinded by the power we gained. We didn’t know that him choosing you was a curse disguised as a blessing,” Cordelia said.

A curse? These ungrateful mortal women! I gave you abilities beyond your wildest dreams, Anhel said.

Let her finish. And that’s my mom you’re talking about! Leave her be. Maybe she didn’t mean it, Daeva thought.

“The day that you found your soulmate should have been one of celebration. But like any mother, I only wanted what was best for my daughter. We were royalty, ruling over an island that no longer exists. The best was the baseline for our family, a duty I took pride in upholding.”

“The Gods normally assisted us in this endeavor,” she continued. “But Anhel and Odi picked one hell of a man to be magically bonded to you by fate and ability. Haydn was the worst candidate that they could have chosen. For him, you abandoned your royal duties. For him, you tore down the vision of greatness that Alexandra created for you.”

“He’s not a horrible person,” Daeva protested. “I know he killed me, but ever since I got to Otherworld, he’s only defended me from danger. He cares about me as much as I hate to admit it.”

“He’s obsessed with you,” Cordelia countered. “Haydn has been hunting for you for a century, according to Nyx. The person that he’s in love with isn’t you. It’s not Evelyn and it’s certainly not Daeva, the person that you’ve become. He’s infatuated with the concept of the Evelyn he possessed.”

“But he was my soulmate. That means something, right?”

Cordelia sighed, putting her head in her hands. “We honored the wishes of the Gods, your father and I. Even though Haydn was lowborn, we invited him into our home. You were deeply in love with him and we seriously considered him as someone who could be your husband. He made you so happy that we had to imagine that he may be your King Consort when you were finally crowned.”

“But he was a sociopath. That man was crazy, Daeva. Around you, he would be on his best behavior. Around us, he would threaten our lives. He blamed our resentment on his class, not his murderous tendencies, always telling you the story of your snobby royal parents who just never approved of your poor soulmate.”

“And you believed him because you were blinded by love. He could do no wrong if he cared for you so much.”

She couldn’t imagine Haydn acting the way her stepmother described. He had been so careful and unselfish around her.

But can’t you? You remember the way he killed you, Anhel said. I don’t like the way she blames me for everything, but to a large degree, she is right about his character.

“I believe you,” Daeva said. “If I was blinded by love, then that must be the reason why I couldn’t see his true nature. But in this second life, I see it.”

“Do you, truly? You said the same thing to me before running away with him.” Cordelia’s gray eyes bored into her.

“My own murder haunts me. The fact that he could destroy me with his own hands like that put me on a quest to regain my memories so I could finally remember who killed me and end his life. I just never expected him to be my soulmate.”

Cordelia exchanges a look with Alexandra, one that Daeva couldn’t decipher.

“I told you so,” Nyx said. “The Evelyn that you two ladies knew changed. Daeva has suffered through many unimaginable things at the hands of men. Don’t tell me that you’re surprised that your little princess lives for revenge.”

“Daeva,” Alexandra said, her name unfamiliar in her mouth. “Is there a way you can let go of your resentments? Being hateful will only destroy you.”

She couldn’t believe what she was hearing and from her mother no less. “I can’t. If I didn’t seek revenge, I would’ve become just as crazy as Haydn, living as long as I have. And if I forgave everyone that wronged me, I would be excusing all of their crimes against me. I have some dignity, you know. My resentments are rational. The bitterness keeps me alive.”

“So torturing the Elysians,” Nyx began.

“Was cathartic,” Daeva finished. “I did not regret a single second of it.”

Cordelia hummed thoughtfully. “Do you still want revenge against Haydn?”

Truthfully, Daeva wasn’t sure. She wanted retribution against her murderer, but she wasn’t sure she was able to carry it out knowing that it was him.

“Let me rephrase,” her stepmother said, responding to her silence. “If there was a way to reverse your murder, would you do it?”

She thinks about it for a moment. “If there was a way to reverse all of the damage I was forced to experience, I would do it.”

“Then you’d be willing to go back in time to make sure that Haydn was never your soulmate,” Cordelia concluded.

Daeva bristled. “I never said that.”

“If Haydn never killed you, you would’ve never met the Elysians and endured the level of suffering that you did. And if you never met him, you could have also avoided your murder,” Alexandra reasoned.

There was no arguing against their airtight logic. She should’ve agreed to their plan immediately based on their rationale. But something held her back.

“Let’s say I agree to go back in time,” she said. “Won’t I forget this conversation and repeat the mistakes of the past?”

“You won’t,” Nyx said. “In fact, you will be a separate entity from your past self, most likely an animal. In your new form, you will need to influence the actions of your past self to change the future.”

The undertaking sounded immensely difficult. “How will that change anything? Why would my past self alter her course of action because some snake told her to?”

“It wouldn’t work like that. Have you ever heard of the butterfly effect?”

Nyx summons an illusion of the insect, making it flap its iridescent blue wings. “For the mages that practice more obscure magic, the butterfly effect is the theory that if something small happens somewhere, like a butterfly flapping its wings, it can cause large changes elsewhere, like a tornado.”

“In the case of time travel, when you go back in time, you embody a great amount of chaos potential solely because you aren’t supposed to be there. That chaos potential makes you the butterfly in this scenario, allowing you to influence large events. But you may also wonder how you will know what you’re supposed to do in the past. For that, your mothers can instruct you in the art of predicting chaos, allowing you to see the strands of fate that weave the future. Once you’ve learned to read those complicated lines, you may go back in time and complete your mission.”

“But it will take years to learn that,” Daeva said. She looks around the room, still unable to believe she was seeing the frozen tableau of Haydn, Uriel, and the other Elysians. “Can you keep time frozen here while I’m gone?”

“And why would I use the extra magical effort to do that?”

She walks over to her children, who were inches away from Ezra’s dagger. Despite replaceing out that they existed only a few moments ago, she knew that it was wrong to keep them in Otherworld at their father’s mercy.

“Your kids,” Nyx said, nodding in understanding. “They are in a precarious position.”

“We have grandchildren!” Alexandra joins Daeva with the twins, enamored by the realization.

Cordelia trails after her with a worried expression on her face. “Who is that person trying to kill them?”

“Their father,” Daeva said. “It’s a long story,” she added after seeing the alarm appear on her mothers’ faces. “But I did not copulate with that man.”

Alexandra looked perplexed. “Then how–”

“I hardly know myself,” Daeva said. “But they’re definitely mine.”

“I will free them,” Nyx reassured her. She touches the children’s heads, setting them back in motion. “They can reside in Underworld while you complete your mission. I’m sure Alexandra and Cordelia would be more than happy to care for them.”

Daeva felt relieved, her muscles relaxing as her mothers took in the twins. She could train for years in the art of predicting chaos and go back in time with ease.

It would be the most interesting adventure we go on so far, Anhel remarked.

A puff of sweet, pale smoke drifts in their direction. Unbeknownst to the group, Tristan had come unfrozen from time. He watches the women while smoking his pipe, trying to see how they fit into his apocalyptic vision of the future.

The end of time was nearly upon them. He wasn’t sure how he knew, but he could tell by the violent tremors in his hand that disaster was coming. His hand grazes Daeva’s Board, feeling the texture of the wood. A colorful vision blooms in his mind, giving him the missing piece to the puzzle. In the grand scheme of things, he finally understood the role he had to play.

“Ladies,” he said, finally announcing his presence to the room. “I hope you’re not thinking of sending Daeva back in time. At least, without telling her the consequences.”

Their heads swivel to him in shock. A heavy silence descends upon the room.

“Time travel is a dangerous activity. It requires a lot of magical energy, the kind that can alter the very shape of the universe,” he said, ignoring the awkwardness in the room. “If you send her back in time, she may destroy the world as we know it. All of existence will be eradicated. Tampering with the strands of fate won’t go unpunished.”

Daeva scanned his snake eyes, searching for some sign of deception. She only saw sincerity as she remembered the way he freed her from the Binding Chains.

“Tristan,” Nyx said coldly. “You have no authority over this matter.”

“I am a seer. I have every authority over the matters of time,” he protested. “You must trust me when I say that this is a bad idea.”

“Daeva is the one we’re sending back to the past,” Cordelia said. “She should be the one with the most say in this matter.”

You need to make the right decision when the opportunity comes, Tristan had told her.

Was this the opportunity he spoke of? He had talked about a small path out of a doomed future, one that she would have control of.

The question was, what was the right decision? She could eradicate her own suffering and bring humanity to great heights, potentially causing the end of all history. Or, she could simply do nothing like the Elysian suggested and never run the risk of dooming the entire universe, letting humanity remain in the dark while knowing that she could have personally made everything better.

She found herself wishing for the first time in her second life that she had only lived a simple mortal existence, one without the complex problems of Godhood.