Twisted Emotions (The Camorra Chronicles Book 2)
Twisted Emotions: Chapter 18

KIARA

Leona gave me a look. “Are you nervous too?”

I laughed. “Nervous doesn’t even begin to cover it. I don’t think I’ll be any good at fighting.” I paused. “But why are you nervous? I thought you’ve practiced with Fabiano before.”

“A few times, yes, but we’ve always been alone. Now there will be people watching.”

I nodded. I wished Nino had chosen to practice alone with me, but I knew he had a lot on his plate because of his upcoming fight against that giant man.

When we stepped out into the training hall, my eyes had trouble taking it all in. The chandelier dangling from the ceiling, the red and gold wallpaper, the broken roulette tables, the beautiful dirty, seashell-shaped windows … It was so typically Falcone to choose something as flashy as an abandoned casino building for their fighting gym.

The men had already gathered around the boxing ring. They were only in fight shorts, and my heart thundered faster at the sight of all that muscle and scars. Even Adamo was muscular for an almost fourteen-year-old.

“Thank God, not the cage,” Leona muttered, and I gave her a questioning look. She smiled. “Fabiano always insists we work out in the cage, and it honestly gives me the creeps.”

My eyes wandered over to the cage, and I had to agree. I was already nervous as it was.

Nino touched my hip when I arrived beside him. “Leona will go first because she already has some practice.”

Trying to hide my relief, I nodded.

Fabiano parted the ropes for Leona, who climbed in with a nervous look toward the Falcone brothers. “Are you all going to watch?”

“No,” Nino said. “I’m going to attack you.”

Leona’s eyes widened. “What? I thought Fabiano would train with me?”

Fabiano shook his head. “Not this time. Being faced with an opponent that makes you nervous is closer to reality.”

Nino swung himself over the rope and faced Leona, his arms hanging down at his side in a relaxed way. “Watch closely, Kiara,” he said.

I nodded.

Nino lunged at Leona, and I noticed Fabiano’s body rocking forward slightly. Leona let out a surprised cry when Nino’s hand clamped down her wrist. He jerked her toward him, and then she was already on her back. He knelt between her legs.

“Leona,” Fabiano hissed. “Remember what I taught you.”

Leona began struggling, but Nino pressed her wrists into the ground above her head, lowering himself, parting her legs further with his muscular thighs.

Remo made a buzzer noise. “There’s no way for you to escape now. You acted too late. Now he’s got you exactly where he wants you.”

I shivered.

“He would have to open his pants. That might give her an opening to attack him with her free hand,” I said.

Everyone looked at me, and I swallowed but stood my ground.

Nino grabbed both of Leona’s wrists in one of his despite her wriggling and showed me his free hand. “Free to open my pants.”

Nino straightened and pulled Leona to her feet.

“Why did you act so late?” Fabiano asked with a frown.

“I was startled, and to be honest … Nino scares me,” she said indignantly.

“Then let’s hope your assailant announces his attack ahead of time and doesn’t scare you,” Remo muttered.

Obviously losing interest, Savio and Adamo moved into the cage and began sparing with each other, but Savio definitely had the upper hand and didn’t take it easy on his younger brother, judging by the force of his kicks and punches. No wonder Adamo was always beat-up.

“Again,” Fabiano said.

Nino grabbed Leona’s arm, but this time she acted instantaneously. She brought her hand up to claw at his face, but he blocked it with his elbow, at the same time dodging her kick aimed at his groin with his hip. Then he threw her down. They ended in the same position as before, and Leona huffed.

“Better,” Nino said with a nod, pushing off her and pulling her to her feet.

“I still ended up on the ground.”

“Your attacker won’t be Nino,” Fabiano said. “He probably won’t be half as fast or strong or skilled.”

They did two more drills until Leona’s face was bright red and covered in sweat. Nino looked like he’d just finished a nice, slow morning walk.

I stifled a smile and when he met my eyes and the corners of his mouth twitched. My body filled with warmth as it so often did in Nino’s presence.

“Your turn,” he said and parted the ropes for me.

Gulping, I climbed inside the ring, and Leona quickly scrambled out, whispering, “Good luck.”

Fabiano immediately wrapped his arm around her waist possessively. Remo shook his head and jumped up on the edge of the ring then swung himself inside.

I stared at Nino, my pulse hammering in my veins. “You will train with me, right?” My voice trembled.

Nino regarded my face then shook his head. “I want you to face your fears. They might immobilize you during a real fight.”

I started shaking as I looked at Remo, who stood with his arms crossed over his chest, watching me with dark amusement.

I shook my head. “No. I can’t.” I backed into the rope. “Please, Nino.”

Nino exchanged a look with his brother, who rolled his eyes.

“I can take over,” Fabiano suggested.

My head swiveled toward him. He terrified me too, but not nearly as much as Remo.

“Then do it,” Remo growled, but he walked toward me, his dark eyes hard. “As long as you don’t face your fears, you will be weak. He will keep power over you as long as you let him. If you ever stop being a coward, come to me and I will show you how to fight an opponent set on hurting you.”

He jumped over the rope and walked toward Adamo and Savio to join them in the cage.

Nino touched my waist, his eyebrows pulled together. “Don’t mind him.”

“Do you agree with him?” I asked quietly.

Nino nodded. “Remo would be the best option if you wanted to simulate an attack.”

“I can be as scary as Remo if you want me to be,” Fabiano said with a shrug.

“No,” I said quickly. “Thanks.”

Fabiano was scary enough with his assessing blue eyes.

“You saw what Leona did,” Nino began. “Of course her past doesn’t harbor the same demons, so you will have to fight two enemies: Fabiano and your memories. I can tell you how to do the first, but the latter is your fight.” He motioned for me to get closer to Fabiano. “You are smaller and weaker, so you will have to make every hit count. Aim where it hurts the most. His balls.” Nino pointed at Fabiano’s groin area, who cocked an eyebrow. “Solar plexus.” He pointed at the area below the ribs. “Under his chin. Eyes. Nose.” He gestured toward Fabiano’s face.

“Here, let me show you,” Nino said and positioned himself in front of Fabiano, whose lips widened into a smile.

Nino brought his knee up sideways toward Fabiano’s groin without making contact. Then he curled his hand into a fist and pretended to punch Fabiano’s stomach twice. Then he pushed the heel of his hand up toward Fabiano’s nose. “You can also scratch or bite, but don’t waste too much time. You will tire eventually.”

Nino stepped back and gave Fabiano a nod.

Fabiano came at me at once, and I seized. Everything happened so fast, and suddenly I was on my back and he was between my legs. Panic choked me. I let out a terrified sob, clenching my eyes shut, and began to shake.

“Fuck,” someone said. Then another cold and compelling voice spoke above me. This voice had brought me back before.

“Kiara, open your eyes.” And I did, looking up into cool, gray eyes. Nino. “Don’t allow the past to control you. You are safe. Nothing will happen to you. I am here.”

I swallowed and gave a small nod. Fabiano had sat back on his haunches, regarding me with a deep frown. I closed my legs, embarrassed. “Sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry,” he said with a shrug, but his eyes were a bit softer than before.

Nino helped me to my feet. “Again?” His eyes held mine, and I gave a small nod. He turned to Fabiano. “This time straddle her legs only.”

Fabiano nodded. “Ready?”

“Yes,” I said, and he reached for my arm, and again, I found myself on my back with Fabiano straddling my thighs. Panic clawed its way out of my chest, and I tried to fight it, but I couldn’t. My vision turned black. Fabiano shoved off me, and I sucked in a deep breath. Nino knelt beside me, touching my shoulder.

“I don’t think it’s working,” Fabiano said. “She is too scared.”

Nino nodded but he kept his eyes on me and his warm palm on my shoulder. “You can leave. I will take it from here.”

Fabiano gave me a tight smile. Then he climbed out of the ring.

“I’m sorry,” I said, embarrassed that I’d broken down like this even though this had been fake, even though Fabiano hadn’t meant to hurt me.

“I underestimated your fear of men. With me, you’ve been relaxed.”

“That’s because I trust you,” I whispered.

His brows pulled together, and he didn’t say anything. “That’s why I wanted you to fight Remo or Fabiano. You are wary of them. It would make the fight more real.”

“I know, but it’s too much right now. Can’t you train with me?”

“Of course, but I will go hard on you, Kiara. It makes no sense to stay within your comfort zone. You won’t improve if you feel safe.”

My stomach clenched with nerves as Nino pulled me to my feet. Nino had a point, and I wanted to show him that I wasn’t weak, and more than that, I wanted to show myself that I could beat my past once and for all. I’d allowed it control my life for too long.

“Step closer.” As I did, he grabbed my wrists, and I tensed in preparation for his attack, but he put my palms up on his shoulders. “Use this to gain momentum and now jerk your knee up as hard as you can.”

I hesitated.

“Do it,” he ordered, and I did. Nino blocked my knee with his thigh so I wouldn’t connect with his groin. I jumped from the impact, a dull pain spreading through my knee and upper thigh. “Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize. You are supposed to hurt me. Again, and harder this time.”

I jerked my knee up again and rammed his thigh. He gave a curt nod. “Better. Still too hesitant. Now make a fist.”

I lowered my hands and curled them into fists.

“Hit my stomach.”

I punched him, but even I could tell that I was holding back. Nino grabbed my hand and curled my fist even tighter. Then he touched it to the spot where he wanted me to aim. “Here. And hard.”

I punched him again, and his mouth tightened. I wasn’t sure if it was because I’d actually managed to hurt him or if he was still not satisfied with my performance. Probably the latter. “Now open your hand and bring the heel of your hand up to my nose.”

I did as he instructed, and he changed the angle of my hand slightly. “Like this. If you use enough force, you can break your opponent’s nose.”

“You perhaps.”

He shook his head. “You can. Trust me. If I use that move with full force, I can kill my opponent by shoving his bones up into his brain, not just break his nose.”

My face scrunched up in disgust.

“Now let’s move on to actual defense. I will attack you, throw you on the ground, and force myself between your legs, and you will try to stop me with everything you have. Don’t hold back, Kiara. You can’t hurt me.”

“Okay,” I said. I wiped my hands of my pants because they were sweaty from nerves.

Nino regarded me calmly, but then something in his expression shifted, becoming calculating and predatory, and I knew he was about to pounce. Despite that knowledge, I yelped when he grabbed me by the hips. After a second of freezing, I brought my knee up, but he dodged it with his thigh and pressed me to the ground with his body. Then he was over me, kneeling between my legs, his pelvis pressed to mine. My wrists were pinned above my head and no amount of struggling made him budge. My breathing turned ragged as panic swirled in the pit of my stomach, not as bad as before, but it was definitely there.

“Fight it,” Nino ordered sharply.

I knew what he meant, but it was so very hard to fight my own mind. I focused on his cool, gray eyes. They had now freed me from my panic twice, and they did again. Slowly, my terror waned and my breathing slowed.

Nino shook his head as he released my wrist, but he stayed on top of me. “It’s good that you replace comfort in my eyes, Kiara, but it won’t help you if you ever get attacked.”

I closed my eyes. “Maybe we just have to accept that I will never be able to defend myself and that the next time someone like my uncle comes around, he can take whatever he wants from me.”

Nino’s lips brushed my ear, making my eyes shoot open in surprise. “You will learn to defend yourself, and I swear nobody will ever hurt you again. Nobody will ever get close.”

He pulled back and his expression set my heart aflame with silly emotions. For a moment neither of us moved, and I touched my palms to his muscled chest. My breathing quickened for another reason. For the first time in my life, I was comfortable with a man being on top of me, with him between my legs. Nino finally broke the moment, pushing himself off me, and held a hand out for me. I took it and let him pull me to my feet, but my body still tingled from his closeness.

“Again,” he said and the tension in his voice overpowered the fluttering in my belly.

NINO

After working out and we came home, Kiara kept throwing glances my way, but the moment I returned them, she looked away. I couldn’t read her mood. She seemed nervous. I went into the shower after she was done but kept the door open as usual. Kiara never came in. My nakedness still made her nervous and it wasn’t only from fear.

Remo had been right. She needed to learn to fight someone who scared her, and that person wasn’t me. Kiara had come to trust me, and I hadn’t expected it. Of course, I had treated her in a way that made me hope for her to be able to relax in my presence. Her cowering fear wasn’t something I could tolerate in a wife. I needed someone who could stand up to me, and Kiara was getting there. We still had a ways to go, but unlike my brother, I was patient.

Leaning back against the shower stall, I turned the water to cold so my cock didn’t get any ideas. I had a feeling Kiara wouldn’t be ready for more exploring today. The fight with Fabiano had unsettled her. And if I was being honest, it had been difficult for me to stand back and watch him touch her, hold her, kneel between her legs. It was something I had never experienced before. I couldn’t place an emotion on what I was feeling.

When I entered the bedroom after my shower, Kiara was propped up against the headboard, wearing a thin, silk nightgown that did little to hide her nipples. Her lean legs were crossed at the ankles, a place where Kiara was beautifully sensitive. Her eyes darted up from the book she was holding and did a quick scan over my naked chest, lingering on my briefs, before she returned her gaze to the book, but she wasn’t able to focus on what she was reading.

Drying my hair, I walked over to where she pretended to read. “What is wrong? Did I do something to make you nervous? Is it because of the training today? I have to make sure you learn to defend yourself. Going easy on you won’t have the desired effect.”

I thought we had settled into some sort of understanding. I wouldn’t budge on the subject of self-defense. Kiara was well protected. As a Falcone, her last name carried fear through the streets in Las Vegas. Everyone knew she was mine. Everyone knew Falcone protected what was ours and our revenge was cruel and merciless. She was as safe as a woman in our world could be, however, I couldn’t see why we shouldn’t guarantee the highest level of safety by making Kiara a difficult target. Her gun skills had improved, but she needed to learn to defend herself without the aid of weapons.

She blushed and set down her book then finally looked up at me. Her eyes trailed over my torso and down to my briefs then quickly back up to my face. I narrowed my eyes, trying to gauge her mood. She was nervous. I dropped the towel I’d used to rub my hair dry and sank down on the bed beside her.

“If you don’t tell me what bothers you, I can’t change my behavior.”

“You did nothing,” she said quietly. Again, her eyes did a quick scan of my upper body, dipping lower, then jerked back up to my face. This wasn’t her being upset over today’s events, I realized. I was fairly sure she was aroused, but as usual, I allowed her to make the first move.

“I—I want to sleep with you.”

My body reacted at once, blood shooting straight into my cock, but I didn’t act on the impulse. I turned toward Kiara, angled my body closer, my arm supporting myself beside her leg, and she scooted forward, dropping her book on the ground. Her lips pressed against mine, and her tongue slipped in. I fought the urge to press her down into the mattress, to cover her with my body and grind myself against her pliable body. I wanted to sink myself into her fucking tight channel, wanted to feel her around my cock and lose myself. There was no denying it.

“Would you like me restrained?” I asked between kisses.

Her brown eyes held mine, and she gave a small shake of her head. “I trust you. I’m not scared of your strength anymore.”

I ran my knuckles down her arm. Trust, it was a fragile thing. I knew. I’d only ever trusted my brothers, but I was starting to trust her too. “I will make this good for you, Kiara.”

She exhaled and a hint of anxiety tightened her lips. “It won’t be like last time, right?” Her voice shook and her eyes looked at me as if she knew I’d keep the past at bay. And fuck, I wanted to do this for her, wanted to show her that what she had gone through wasn’t something she would ever relive again.

I traced her breasts through her top. “It will be nothing like that.” I kissed her chin down to her throat and collarbone, breathing in her sweet scent, relishing the feel of her silk-soft skin against my lips. “There won’t be pain or fear. You will be in control.”

Her fingers found the back of my head, and she pushed me down. I complied, brushing her strap off her shoulder and laying her breast bare. I closed my mouth around her erect nipple, and sucked it into my mouth, enjoying the way it puckered under my ministrations.

She gasped, goose bumps rippling over her skin. My hand cupped her other breast, massaging gently before my thumb found her nipple and swiped over it, eliciting a moan from her. I swiped again as I circled her other nipple with my tongue. She began shifting restlessly beside me as she knelt on the bed.

“Nino,” she whispered. “Please.”

“Please what?” I asked in a raspy voice. I was painfully hard in my briefs, but I tried to shove my need to the back burner.

“I need to come.”

“Do you want my mouth?”

She gave a jerky nod.

“Then lie down.”

She scooted back and lay down. I climbed on the bed then hooked my fingers in her panties, and when she didn’t tense, I pulled them down. She lifted her butt to make it easier for me. Slowly, I eased a knee between her legs, watching her face. There was a second of resistance before she opened up for me. Putting my second knee between her legs, I brushed her thighs lightly and eased her legs farther apart. The sight of her glistening folds sent a ripple of desire through my body, straight into my cock.

Patience was a virtue, but at this moment, being patient felt like an insurmountable task. Taking a deep breath, I stretched out between her thighs as she watched me with need, lips parted, eyes wide and trusting.

She was already very aroused from my ministrations to her nipples, aroused enough for sex, but I wanted her to be relaxed from several orgasms before I entered her. I kissed her thigh, working my way higher to where she wanted my mouth. I breathed over her folds, causing her legs to tremble with need. I kissed her pubic bone then her folds before I took a long lick, tasting her, not caring that it made my cock even harder. Her taste was like a fucking catalyst of my own lust.

Kiara breathed deeply, almost relieved. I established a rhythm of light flutters over her clit and slow circles over her opening until she was writhing and panting. When she was making small, desperate rocking motions with her hips, I pressed my tongue up against her clit firmly, and she fell apart with a cry. Her hand came down on my head, holding me in place, as I focused on her entrance, dipping my tongue in, burying my face all the way in her perfect lap.

I stroked her thigh then moved my hand closer to her pussy and brushed my fingers over her wet flesh. Tracing my index finger along her slit, I waited a few moments, but she didn’t tense, and so I slipped one finger into her. My cock jerked, knowing that soon I’d be buried in her wet heat. I began fucking her with my finger slowly as I circled her clit. And that sight lit me on fire. I imagined this came close to feeling emotions, this burning, all-consuming need. Better than the feel of her arousal was the breathless moan falling from Kiara’s mouth, the softness of her thighs telling me she enjoyed this without any reservations because she trusted me to be good to her.

I raised my eyes to watch her.

My finger was engulfed by her wetness, and she was fisting the bedsheets, making desperate little moans in her throat. I pulled back a couple of inches.

“How is it, Kiara?” My voice was tight and deep—on edge—but Kiara didn’t seem bothered by it. A strange warmth settled in my chest, one I couldn’t place.

“Good,” she whispered then gasped as I curled my finger inside of her, pressing my pad lightly against her G-spot.

“Good?”

“So good, Nino. So good.” She sounded as if this was a fucking miracle, as if it was a revelation I had offered her, and something strangely possessive filled my chest.

Kiara was mine.

“Good,” I murmured against her wet flesh before I closed my mouth over her clit again and brushed her G-spot. She came again, arching up, clawing at the sheets, gasping and moaning, and I softened my ministrations, allowing her to ride this out. I knew I needed to test her readiness with another finger, but warning her about it posed the risk that she’d tense again. However, she needed to feel in control. “I want to put a second finger in you.”

A moment of hesitation. “Okay.”

“Try to relax or I will tickle you again,” I warned as I slid my finger in and out slowly.

She laughed, and I eased my second finger into her. She tightened in surprise and I didn’t move, letting her realize that no pain would follow. She was too wet for that. “Good?”

“Okay,” she said.

“Then let’s try to make it good.” I moved up her body, keeping my fingers inside of her and closed my mouth over her nipple. I teased it for a while before I began moving my fingers in a slow rhythm.

Kiara’s walls hugged them tightly, and I couldn’t wait to feel them around my cock. After a few seconds, Kiara met my thrusts with her pelvis as I sucked her nipple harder. I released her nub to ask how it was, but Kiara was faster.

“Good, Nino. Please don’t stop.”

I returned my mouth to her waiting nipple, lightly nibbling, and soon Kiara arched under me, crying out her release. I eased my fingers out of her, which were coated in her juices, and that sight almost undid me.

Her eyes fluttered open, her gaze unfocused, lips pulled into a small, satisfied smile.

“Your body is ready,” I rasped, teetering on the edge of control. I’d rarely allowed myself to lose control, and tonight would definitely not be the day.

“I’m ready,” she said softly, eyes searching my face. I smiled at her, knowing she needed it to be set at ease.

I pushed myself up and off Kiara. “I think it’s best for you to be on top.”

“I’m not sure I can do this. Can you be on top?”

I nodded but given her nerves as soon as she realized my physical power, being on top seemed a bad choice. In the boxing ring today, she had handled it well, but it was different than submitting to someone in a bed. I got out of my briefs. I was already painfully hard, but I knew I needed to go slow for Kiara. Never in my life did I have to hold back for someone. I took whatever pleasure women could offer me, and they could offer plenty, but Kiara was my wife and I wanted to treat her right, treat her like a wife was supposed to be treated.

Kiara wasn’t a whore or debtor. She was my wife. A Falcone. My responsibility.

She watched me with nerves and trust. I wasn’t sure why the realization that she trusted me pleased me as much as it did; only my brothers trusted me, and now Kiara—even though her past had taught her that the people she trusted ended up hurting her.

I climbed back on the bed, and Kiara smiled, but her lips trembled as she did so. I wanted to be in her.

“We don’t have to do this,” I told her, even if the words flowed painfully from my lips.

“No,” she said immediately, touching my chest. Her fingers were shaking. I brought her palm to my mouth and kissed it. She relaxed slightly, reacting well to tenderness, as usual. I enjoyed being gentle with Kiara because the way she responded gave me a great deal of satisfaction. It was a new experience that I hadn’t thought possible.

I moved over her slowly, and she opened her legs for me so I could kneel between them. Supporting myself on my arms, I looked down at my wife. I could already see that she was getting overwhelmed by my presence. Her breathing had quickened, and her lashes were fluttering nervously. I wished there was a way for her to realize that this had nothing to do with the rape of her past. Her being on top of me still seemed like the best solution to the problem.

I hovered over her, not moving. “You will feel even more out of control if I enter you. My weight will press you into the mattress, and you will have to yield to the pressure I apply. There really is no helping it,” I rasped, trying to ignore the way my cock jerked as I grazed the inside of her thigh. A slight shift of my hips and one thrust was all it would take to sate the burning desire in my veins.

“Why do you want this position?” I asked quietly.

“Because I want you to take lead … and I want to be close to you when we have sex with each other.”

“Even when you sit on top of me, I can hold you in my arms. I can easily lead even when you ride me.”

Her cheeks flushed at the word ride.

I pushed myself off her and sat back against the headrest. “Move on top,” I ordered, deciding to take the decision off her hands.

Kiara got to her knees, biting her lower lip in uncertainty. I softened my expression and brushed her unruly curls away from her face. She leaned into the touch at once. I stroked her cheek with my thumb then ran my fingers down her throat and over her arm. She let out a small breath.

“Ready?” I asked in a forced calm voice.

Kiara nodded and moved closer to me. I grabbed her waist and helped her settle on my lower abdomen. I exhaled when her arousal pressed up against my abs. Her body was so fucking ready. Wrapping my arm around her back, I pulled her toward me, my lips claiming hers in an unrestrained kiss.

Kiara returned the kiss eagerly and rubbed her wet pussy over my pelvis, unconsciously slipping down. I stifled a growl. I just wanted to bury myself in her, but I held back for her, let her feel comfortable on top of me.

When she finally leaned back and looked at me for help, I said, “Lift up a bit and scoot back.” She did until she straddled my thighs. I curled my hand around my shaft. She swallowed thickly. “It will be good. I will take care of you, Kiara.”

She nodded with a small smile as she gripped my shoulders and positioned herself above my cock. Slowly, her palms slid down until they pressed against my chest and her sopping wet entrance brushed my tip. I restrained a groan, not wanting to startle or scare her.

My balls tightened, my muscles clenching. Fuck. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d wanted someone as much as I wanted Kiara right this moment.

“It might sting a little, but you are very aroused, Kiara.” I knew I’d replace no resistance if I plunged into her. Her body was ready for claiming, but her expression displayed apprehension. I was better at reading her emotions now.

“Help?” she whispered, her dark brown eyes trusting, and my heart picked up its pace for some inexplicable reason.

I pressed my heels into the mattress for leverage and grasped her hips to hold her in place. “I’m going to shift my hips now and enter you,” I warned. “I will go very slow so your body can adapt. Tell me if you need me to stop.”

Pushing up slightly, my tip slipped in and I suppressed a groan as her walls fisted me tightly. Her lips fell open, brows pulling together. She leaned forward, bringing our faces even closer so her sweet breath ghosted over my face. Her wide eyes held mine.

“Pain?” I asked, my voice harder, rougher than I wanted it to be. With how wet she was, I couldn’t imagine she felt pain, but she was also very tight, a delicious combination for my cock and one that made me want to plunge hard and deep into her.

“No,” she said. “Stretched.”

I waited, even if my body screamed for me to buck my hips and impale her on my length. Her eyes held so many emotions, I had no way of grasping a single one. How must it feel to have that kind of chaos inside your body?

She moved her pelvis, and I took that as permission to lift my hips. I slid deeper into her, her tight heat encasing me perfectly, and she closed her eyes.

“Kiara,” I forced out. “I need to see your eyes.” I had trouble reading her facial expression without seeing the look in her eyes.

Her lids fluttered open. “Sorry.”

I stroked her sides, and she licked her lips. “You can go deeper.”

And I did. This time I didn’t stop. As I raised my hips, I helped her down until her pussy pressed against my pelvis. I lowered myself to the mattress and took her with me. She became still on top of me as I filled her completely. Fuck. This felt as close to perfection as I could imagine.

She breathed out, and her fingers flexed against my skin. I swallowed. Never before had someone felt as good around my cock. My body screamed to move, to seek the pleasure her tightness could offer. She clung to me, completely motionless.

“Okay?” I asked in a low voice.

Kiara exhaled again. “It feels … good.” Tears filled her eyes, and I became as still as she was.

“Why the tears?”

She leaned forward to kiss me and shifted my cock inside of her. I moaned against her mouth, and she gave a small shudder. Her lips brushed mine, and I took her up on the invitation, tasting her mouth. Kissing had always seemed a necessary evil many women required during intercourse, but with Kiara it spiked my own arousal.

Slowly, she pulled back, eyes dark and teary. “I feel like I’m finally free of him.”

I stroked her back gently, trying to understand. I had killed him as brutally as I was capable of, and yet this act of tenderness finally destroyed the demons of her past, the memories of his actions. I tightened my hold on her, bringing our bodies flush together, my back pressed against the headboard. For once I didn’t know what to say, and it was an unsettling experience.

I began moving, rotating my hips slowly, gently, and she gasped. She looked into my eyes and brushed her lips over mine. Trust. Tenderness. And so many more emotions I didn’t understand. I’d never truly resented my incapability to feel, but in this moment I did.

“It feels so good, Nino.”

I angled my hips the same way, and Kiara’s lids fluttered, but she didn’t close her eyes. It was as if she needed to see me, so I returned her gaze. Her lips parted for a soft moan. It was a perfect sound, more perfect than any melody Kiara had ever created on her piano and she had created some of the most beautiful melodies I’d ever heard.

Brushing my thumb over her clit, it moved easily over her heated flesh coated with her juices. My other hand cupped her breast, my thumb flicking over the hardened nub. She cried out and clenched around me.

My eyes rolled back as I fought for control. I wanted to go harder, faster. Fuck. I forced the urge down and focused on my wife as she rocked her hips almost helplessly, trying to replace more pleasure but uncertain of her moves. I let her discover the motion she loved as I kept slowly thrusting upward. Every time her eyes widened or her lips parted, my fucking heart clenched. I wasn’t sure what was wrong with me. It wasn’t a physical response I’d ever encountered during sex.

I flicked my thumb over her clit faster and sped up my thrusts. Kiara’s walls clamped tightly around my cock, her nails digging into my skin. She rocked faster, barely meeting my thrusts. It was uncoordinated and unpracticed and yet the best thing I’d ever watched. The fucking best thing I’d ever felt.

Her eyes grew wide, body tightening as she came with loud moan. And finally I let loose, slamming harder into her and hoping she could take it but too far gone to ask, until my release hit me like a tidal wave. My head fell back against the headboard as I spent myself inside her. The fucking tightness in my chest remained.

She fell forward and clung to me, her face buried in my neck, her lips leaving kiss after kiss against my sweaty skin. I ran my hands over her back and arms but stayed away from her neck. That was still a spot she was nervous about. She softened under my touch, breathing deeply.

“I love you,” she whispered, and we both stiffened at the same time.

Her breathing hitched against my throat.

Love?