Until You (Off-Limits) -
Until You: Chapter 11
“How was she today? I should’ve turned my phone off and ignored the emergencies they called me in for. It’s not like I’m the only doctor they’ve got. Someone would’ve handled it. I should’ve known better.”
I shake my head. “Let’s be honest,” I say. “She wouldn’t have wanted you around today, and you know it. If you truly believed Aria needed you today, you would’ve stayed. You knew she needed space as well as I did.”
Noah falls silent and turns to look at Aria. We both watch as she busies herself setting the table, having refused our help. “She’s made a whole chicken roast, so she’s not okay,” he says. “She only does a roast when she feels guilty. I don’t want her to feel guilty. None of what happened was her fault, and I don’t know how to tell her that without reopening her wounds. I don’t want to make her cry, man.”
Her eyes are still red and swollen, and her smile is missing. Noah is right. She probably does feel guilty, but not for the reasons he’s thinking. My mind drifts back to this morning when she sat with me as I worked. The helplessness she was radiating when she told me about the phone call she got yesterday… I can’t even begin to understand what she must be feeling. I wish I could do something. If she’d let me, I’d be the one to tell Noah about it so she doesn’t have to, but it’s not my place. They might call me their family, but stuff like this I can’t be part of. I can’t help them. Not with this.
“Come on,” I tell him, my hand on his shoulder. “She’s put so much effort into dinner. We’d better go join her.”
Noah nods and forces a smile onto his face as we walk into the dining room. Aria looks up, and her expression sends a pang of hurt straight to my heart. She’s trying so hard to be brave, but I can see her falling apart right in front of me, and it kills me to have to pretend she’s fine when all I want to do is take her into my arms and catch every single tear she’s holding back.
I walk up to her and place my hand on her lower back. “Sit,” I tell her. Her eyes meet mine, and I can’t quite describe the moment that passes between us. It’s a moment of intimacy and trust, a moment of her showing me the burdens she’s carrying. She nods and sits down quietly as I fill all three of our plates.
“How was your day?” Noah asks her carefully.
Aria looks up at her brother, her shoulders tense. “Noah…”
He lifts his brows in question, and I sit down next to her, my arm on the back of her chair in a show of silent support.
Aria looks down at her lap before facing her brother again. “There’s something I need to tell you, and I… I don’t know how.”
Noah sits up, alarmed. I can see the scenarios running through his mind, but the truth is far worse than he’s imagining.
“Our lawyer called me yesterday,” she says, her voice barely above a whisper. “They… They let him go on good behavior.”
Noah stands up, his chair clattering to the floor loudly, his eyes wide. Agony distorts his face, and he lifts a shaky hand, pulling it through his hair. “Jack called you yesterday? Before…”
Aria looks away and wraps her arms around herself. “Yeah… that’s why I got home early.”
Noah walks up to her and takes her into his arms, hugging her tightly, both of them silent and lost in their grief. “I’m sorry it took me so long to tell you,” she mumbles against his chest.
Noah pulls away and pats her head. “It’s okay, Ari. You had more than enough on your mind yesterday.”
He lets go of her and walks over to the cabinet in the corner, grabbing a bottle of scotch. Noah rarely drinks. He’s too aware of what liquor does to your body, and he can’t stand the thought of it.
Aria and I are both silent as he pours all three of us a glass. He empties his own and refills it instantly, emptying that too. Aria looks at me helplessly, but I don’t know what to do either. There’s nothing I can do to make this better.
“Jack is looking into it, seeing if there’s a way to fight this.”
Noah nods, but looking at the both of them, it’s obvious neither believes they stand a chance at making a difference.
“Are you okay?” Aria asks carefully.
Noah nods absentmindedly. “Are you?”
She nods, but it’s clear to me that both of them are just being brave for the other. I feel like I’m intruding on what is clearly a private moment of grief, and I rise to escape to the guest room. I only manage to take one step before Aria grabs my hand.
“I’m exhausted,” she says, her voice soft, her hand tightening around mine as she turns to face her brother. “Will you be okay, Noah?”
He smiles at her and nods. “Go. Go to bed, little one.”
Aria glances back at me before letting go of my hand, her gaze pleading. I nod at her, my heart filled with affection. I’m strangely honored that she trusts me to take care of Noah in a situation like this one.
She’s only just rounded the corner when my phone buzzes in my pocket.
Aria: If I stay, he’ll want to console me. He hates being vulnerable around me, and he needs to process this news without worrying about me. Will you be there for him?
Grayson: Always.
Noah inhales shakily and pours himself another glass as I put my phone away. I sit down next to him and take the scotch he hands me.
We both sit in silence, making our way through half the bottle before Noah speaks again.
“I can’t imagine the day she had yesterday. Fuck.”
I nod. Now, more than ever, I’m glad I punched that asshole in the face. “What about you, though? You all right?”
Noah shakes his head and runs a hand through his hair. “I knew this day was coming, but I thought it’d be another ten years from now. I don’t get it. This guy killed our parents and now he gets to go free? Our lives are destroyed, Gray. My sister smiles all the time, but you know as well as I do that every single one of those smiles is fake.”
He sniffs, as though he’s holding back tears, and a hollow laugh escapes his lips. “She’s the one that found them, you know? I never told you this, but Aria walked into the house just minutes after the burglary. She found our parents in a pool of their own blood, their eyes wide open. She didn’t speak for months. It should’ve been me. Between the two of us, it never should’ve been her that went through that. It took months of therapy for her to even say my name, and to this day, she’s never spoken to me about what happened. She spoke to the police, but never to me. If not for the case files, I’d never have known what she saw. At the time… fuck. I thought I’d lost her too.”
He grabs the bottle and brings it to his lips, gulping far too much down. “After all that, she’s concerned about me. Her heart is fucking broken, but she still worries about me. Gray, what the fuck do I do? I just want her to be happy, and all this shit that’s happening. Fuck. She deserves so much more. I fucked up, man.”
I shake my head and take the bottle from him. “You didn’t, Noah. The woman she is today, the strength she portrays? You had a part in that. Even though you two lost everything, you ensured that she always knew she had you. You two remained a family, and that’s the best thing you ever could’ve done for her.”
He shakes his head. “It’s not enough. She’s lost so much in the span of twenty-four hours. Her job, her boyfriend, and now this…” Noah looks at me, his expression serious, and I instinctively sit up. “When you told her she’d always be welcome at your firm, did you mean it?”
I nod. “I wouldn’t have offered if I didn’t, Noah. You know that.”
He looks at me in a way I can’t decipher. He’s usually an open book to me, but tonight I can’t tell what he’s thinking.
“Take her with you. I might not know much about what you do, but I know Aria is good. She’s always studied hard, and all she needs is a chance. Please, give it to her. For years, Aria has been the one that took care of me, when our roles should’ve been reversed. Even now, she’s in so much pain, but she left the room because she thought that’s what I needed. She’s always put me first, Gray, and I’ve failed her. I didn’t pay enough attention to her happiness. I didn’t step up when I thought Brad wasn’t right for her, and I haven’t helped her chase her dreams, because I was too busy following my own. She deserves the world, Grayson. I don’t want to see her lose more of her spirit trying to replace a job, and I think she needs a fresh start.”
He looks at me with such faith that I have to look away. “I’ll ask her again tomorrow. If she accepts, I’ll happily give her a job.”
Noah shakes his head and stares me down, his expression serious. “I want you to take care of her, Gray. I know you love your space, but Aria is far more fragile than she lets on. Even if it’s just for the first few weeks, please…”
I blink, confused. “You want her to stay with me?”
Noah nods. “Cali will be such a big change for her, and I have no idea how she’s going to cope with the break-up and the betrayal. I need you to look after her in my stead. I need to know that she’s okay, that she’s moving on with her life instead of letting this ruin her. You didn’t see her a few years ago… Aria… she’s got enough demons chasing her. I don’t know if she’ll be able to take the additional stabs at her heart. I need you to keep an eye on her and step in if it looks like she isn’t doing okay.”
I look away. I’ve not lived with anyone in years. The one week a year that I stay with Noah is the closest I ever get to having someone in my personal space. I’ve not shared my home since I finally made enough money to have a place of my own.
“Promise me, Gray. Promise me you’ll take care of her the way I would.”
“I promise,” I say, without a second thought. He doesn’t even need to ask. I’ll always look out for Aria. “But I can’t guarantee that she’ll take me up on my offer.”
Noah smiles. “Oh, she will. She admires you far more than she lets on.”
Aria admiring me? Somehow, the thought of that warms my heart. I wonder what it’ll be like to have her living with me. Somehow, the thought of having Aria in my home doesn’t seem so revolting.
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