Variation: A Novel
Variation: Chapter 17

OnPointe34: Whoever said you could pull off that outfit lied.

Bright2Lit: This is a bad take. She’s killing that leo.

OnPointe34: That leotard is considering unaliving itself.

“You look like you’re going to prom.” Eric laughed, slinging his arm across the back of the green velvet sofa in the center of Franklin’s Formalwear.

“He was shorter at his prom,” Mr. Franklin himself muttered as he judged the lines of the third tux I’d tried on this morning.

“I still don’t understand why you don’t rock the dress whites.” He crossed his ankle over his knee. “Women love that whole Officer and a Gentleman vibe. At least Jess does.”

“Allie said black tie, and whatever she says is what I’m going with.” Especially since that invitation had been the only communication she’d given me since last weekend. It had been the first and only time a woman hadn’t returned a text or a call after I’d kissed her. Talk about bursting an ego.

The kissing itself hadn’t been the issue—that had been in a realm beyond perfect. For a second, she’d been right there with me, fire and all. No mask, no walls, just Allie. Fuck, I could still taste her, still feel the thrum of her pulse beneath my lips, still hear the moan that went straight to my dick. We’d ignited the second our mouths met, and as much as I’d loathed bearing painful witness to the hurt I’d caused her, I was also thankful she’d stopped us when she did. My control had been hovering on the edge, and the first time I sank inside her sure as hell wasn’t going to be in a public shower stall. After that kiss, I knew there would be a first time. And a thousandth. I’d never felt chemistry like that in my life. We were a foregone conclusion.

Knowing Allie, that was why she hadn’t called, because the kiss had been real. And while it made me realize that I wanted us to be real, even if it was just for the summer, it had scared the shit out of her.

“Turn.” Mr. Franklin gestured with his pointer finger, and I turned, wincing when I looked in the mirror.

“Can we lose the bow part of the black tie?” I felt like I just needed a rabbit and a top hat to complete the act in this thing.

Mr. Franklin looked around me, meeting my gaze in the mirror. “It’s fashionable to wear a normal tie as well.”

Thank fuck.

“You spending the weekend in New York?” Eric asked, scrolling through his phone one-handed.

“I have no idea.” Were we staying together? Separately?

He laughed. “Watching you have absolutely zero control in this situation is amazing.”

“Glad you’re enjoying it.” I turned again when Mr. Franklin told me to. “I got leave approved, so if she wants to stay the weekend, we’ll stay the weekend, and I’ve studied the Company website, so I’m prepared to meet her friends.” The idea of getting to see her life, her apartment, her work was utterly fascinating. Our only time together had been spent on behalf of Juniper. Allie hadn’t even been to my house. If it’s even going to stay your house. “You get it yet?”

Eric shook his head. “They’re supposed to be out by now. I swear, they do this just to fuck with us.”

Mr. Franklin shot Eric a disapproving look, not that he noticed as he hit Refresh over and over.

“They’re not going to send out scores on a Sunday.” I was both desperate to know and dreading all at the same time.

“Of course you’re not nervous.” Eric dropped his phone on the couch. “We all know you passed with flying colors. The only question is how high on the promotion list you’ll be.”

And what duty stations I’d put on the request list that was due in eight weeks. You have to stay here. But did I?

If I chose New York, could Allie and I have a shot? Not with your past between you. The best I could hope for was a classic summer fling, and I already knew it wouldn’t be enough.

“You passed too,” I told Eric. “I’m sure of it.”

“I think this one complements your frame better than the others,” Mr. Franklin noted, walking around the pedestal I stood on like some damned prize pony. “What do you think?”

“Clean lines. All the chaperones will approve. Just don’t forget the corsage.” Eric gave me a thumbs-up.

“Remind me why I thought you’d be helpful?” I glanced over the tux, then back at Mr. Franklin. “It’s great. Can the alterations be done in the next ten days?”

“No problem.” Mr. Franklin gestured toward the dressing room.

“Now that your monkey suit has been chosen, am I free to go grab brunch with my girlfriend? Or do you need a second opinion on the shoes too?” Eric stuck another piece of gum in his mouth and started chewing.

“Say hi to Jessica for me.” I stepped off the pedestal.

“No way. She’s still pissed about you blowing off Beth.” He got up from the couch and threw me a wave on his way out the door, and I headed for the dressing room.

My phone rang as I pulled on my T-shirt, and I swiped to answer as soon as I saw Gavin’s name scroll across the bottom of the screen. “What’s up?”

The sound of running water filled the line. “What are you doing right now?” Gavin asked.

“Finishing a tux fitting,” I answered as I sat on the plastic chair to put my shoes on. “What are you doing? White water rafting?”

“Not exactly.” Stress practically oozed out of his voice. “A pipe busted at the bar, and the whole damned kitchen is flooded. I’m here waiting for the plumber because Scott’s out of town.”

“That sucks.” I slipped my shoes on and laced them quickly. “And you’re calling me because . . .” I gathered up the tux and walked out of the dressing room.

“Because I fucked up.”

“Okay.” My eyebrows rose. “In a you-sneaked-Melanie-Dunn-into-our-room-and-need-to-get-her-out-before-Mom-sees kind of way?” I set the tux on the counter and reached for my wallet. “Or a need-to-bring-a-shovel kind of way?”

“You’ll pay when you pick it up,” Mr. Franklin told me. “I’ll call when it’s ready.”

“Thank you.” I headed out of the store, a sense of dread growing heavier with every second that Gavin didn’t answer. “Gav, if it’s a bring-your-own-shovel kind of event, calling me on the cell phone is what will get us featured on a true-crime podcast.”

“I didn’t kill anyone,” he muttered, the sound slightly garbled by the rushing water. “But she’s going to kill me if she replaces out.”

“Who?” My feet hit the pavement, and I unlocked my truck with the key fob. Main Street was already flooded with tourists, and there was a line outside the restaurant across the street. The café was no doubt packed too.

“Caroline.”

I froze at the edge of the curb. It was Sunday. That dread exploded into a full-on alarm blaring in my head. “Where’s Juniper?”

“Look. I know you’ll be pissed, but she asked me to help, and I didn’t want to tell her no. You’re not the only one capable of showing up for her. And I’ve never forgotten to pick her up. Not once in five months, but this situation’s kind of out of my control. I won’t make it in time, and I don’t want her sitting there waiting, you know?”

“Where is she?” I jogged around my truck and threw open the driver’s side door.

“You have to promise you won’t tell Caroline.” He sighed. “It’s not like I was doing anything worse than what you are with Allie.”

“Gavin, where the fuck is our niece?” I climbed into the truck and pushed the start button, then dropped the fob into the cup holder.

“She’s in Cedarville. If you leave now, you might get there before she’s done. I’m texting you the address.”

My phone buzzed with a text message and I quickly opened it. I stared at the name of the place for two seconds before putting it into my GPS. Then I lifted the phone back to my ear. “You’re not going to have to worry about Caroline—”

“Thank you—”

“Because I’m going to kill you myself.” I hung up.

Nineteen minutes and four broken traffic laws later, I pulled into the only empty parking spot in front of the strip mall and killed the engine. There were still nine minutes left of her class when I walked into the ballet studio.

That irresponsible asshat.

How fucking dare he compare what I was doing with Allie to what he’d been hiding for the last five months? I waded into a sea of waiting parents, most of whom were seated in front of the glass that partitioned the waiting area from the studio, and cut through the ones who stood along the back, carrying on conversations.

I glanced over the full front row of seats, then stared as the woman on the left, closest to the wall, tilted her head slightly and revealed the face beneath the black baseball cap. Allie?

What in the actual fuck was happening?

I made my way to the wall, then maneuvered myself up the narrow aisle along its edge, dodging purses and cups of coffee until I reached the front, where Allie sat. The brim of her hat had been tugged down low, and she’d covered most of her hands with the oversize sleeves of her dark sweatshirt, which she held clasped in front of her mouth.

She looked pissed.

“I’ll take it from that look, you don’t approve either?” I asked.

Her face whipped my direction, her gaze pinning me to the wall before she turned it back on the class. “Get down, or she’ll see you.”

“I kind of hope she does,” I admitted, folding my arms across my chest. “At least then she’ll have an inkling of how much trouble she’s in.”

“Well, I’m observing the class, and I don’t want her to see me,” she retorted. “So get down.”

Okay then. I crouched, jostling Allie’s chair with my shoulders as I crammed my body into a space fit for a toddler. The scent of Allie’s perfume hit me like a shot of perfect tequila, and I breathed deep, more than ready to be drunk. At least there was one positive to come from this morning. “When did you replace out?”

“I saw her bag in Gavin’s car at the beach and figured the rest out about five days ago, but wanted to be sure before I told you,” she said, bracing her elbows on her knees and leaning forward. “What about you?”

“Gavin called about twenty minutes ago and let me know he wouldn’t be able to pick her up.” My jaw flexed. “So I’m still processing.” I surveyed the class of what looked to be about two dozen girls and spotted Juniper in the front row. “Is she in pointe shoes?”

“Yep.” Allie bit out the word, her gaze shifting to the clock above my head. “For all of another seven minutes, she is.”

“I can’t believe he went behind my back,” I muttered.

“I can’t believe she did.” Her huff reeked of sarcasm. “What am I saying, of course I believe she did. Look at what she has us doing.”

“True.” I glanced at my watch. Six minutes left and I needed to make the most of them. “I got my tux today.”

“Oh.” She looked back at me, then jerked her face forward again. “Thank you.”

“Did you want to stay the weekend in New York?”

“You don’t have to. I have a couple of appointments on Friday afternoon, so as long as you’re there by Saturday evening, we should be good.” She tugged her sleeve over the heel of her hand when it slipped.

“I took leave so I can go down with you,” I offered awkwardly.

“Okay, that would be nice.”

I let a few moments of silence pass, but I had to ask, had to know. “Will your mother be at the gala?”

“No.” She shook her head, keeping her focus on Juniper. “I doubt she’ll ever step foot in New York again. She chose where she wants to be.”

Right, because she was teaching somewhere. Well, that was one less complication.

The teacher yelled, the sound muffled by the glass enclosure, and Allie’s eyes narrowed as the girl next to Juniper started to cry.

“I’d love to see her raise her voice to Juniper,” I muttered.

“Megan, I think Olivia’s crying,” one of the moms to the right called out.

“Again? She really needs to learn how to take constructive criticism.”

Allie’s fists clenched.

“Do you want me to get a hotel for New York?” I asked her, and damn if my stomach didn’t go all queasy on me.

“No.” She shook her head. “The hotel prices there are ridiculous. Just stay at my apartment.”

Victory. “Sounds good.” I fought a smile.

The teacher’s voice escalated as the girls repeated some choreography, and then she threw a water bottle down the line of mirrors.

Oh, I think the fuck not.

“Quinn’s in another one of her moods today,” a mom noted like it was nothing.

I moved to rise, but Allie threw her arm over my knees. “Don’t. You’ll just make it worse.”

“I’m just supposed to watch a grown-ass adult throw shit four feet away from our niece?” I growled.

“Yes.” Allie’s arm locked like she was the seat belt and I was the kid in a car seat. “And then you trust me to handle it. This is my ocean.”

My eyebrows rose. I’d never seen Allie so much as raise her voice to anyone but me. “Fine, but if the next thing she throws hits Juniper—”

“It won’t. She doesn’t want to hurt the girls physically, just emotionally.” She withdrew her arm.

What kind of sadistic shit was that?

Four minutes left. Timing was crap, but we had a modicum of privacy here in the corner, and it had to be said. “Look, about what happened at the beach—”

“Don’t mention it.” She tensed.

“Allie—”

“I mean it, Hudson. Don’t mention it.” Her chin titled upward. “As far as I’m concerned those five minutes never happened.”

Damn it. My ribs constricted, making it difficult to draw the next breath. “But they did happen. You felt it too. It was real. At least be brave enough to admit it. We aren’t kids anymore.”

Precious seconds ticked by before she responded. Three minutes.

“Fine. It was real, and utterly foolish.” She turned her head, and our eyes locked. “If we want this to continue, it can never happen again.”

The feeling of victory fled as quickly as it had appeared.

“Is that a rule?” Because we were going to break the shit out of it. I would happily use every weapon in my arsenal—including our chemistry—to get another real moment out of her.

Her brow knit, and she faced forward again. “If we need to be affectionate like that in public, then fine. We’ll keep it short and impersonal.”

“Allie, nothing between us is short or impersonal, especially not when we get our hands on each other.”

“Precisely the problem.” She folded her arms, and I could almost see her throw brick after brick into the very walls I wanted to crush. Two minutes.

“You’re really fighting for your life in there, aren’t you?” I asked.

She stiffened.

“That kiss scared the shit out of you.” I waited until I was sure she wouldn’t answer. “Why? Because you enjoyed it? Because we both lost control? Or because for five blissful minutes I got behind that mask you love to wear?”

She slipped her hands into the sleeves of her hoodie and leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees.

“Here’s the thing. I’m not scared to admit that I want you.” It was the easiest of the confessions I owed her.

Her lips parted.

“I haven’t earned my way out of you hating me yet, and this arrangement is a summer thing. You made that clear. But you want me too. I know it. You know it.” Her pulse leapt in her throat, and I swallowed. “And when you’re ready to admit it, five minutes won’t cut it. I’ll devote hours, days, nights to being incredibly personal with you.”

“Hours?” She arched a brow my direction, but even her perfect control couldn’t keep the blush from rising in her cheeks. “I’d almost forgotten how arrogant you can be.” She shook her head.

“It’s not arrogance if you can back it up.” I held her gaze. “Say the word.”

Pink stained her cheeks and she ripped her gaze from mine. “Oh look, class is over.”

And so was the moment.

She stood, gathering her purse and an aluminum water bottle from under her chair as girls in the studio beyond the glass took off their pointe shoes, grabbed their bags, and began exiting the studio through the door on the right.

I rose to my feet, then folded my arms and waited for Juniper to see us.

It took all of three seconds.

She paused on the other side of the glass, her eyes widening as her gaze jumped back and forth between Allie and me. She clutched the thick canvas strap of her bag and retreated a step.

“Yeah, I’d run if I were you too,” Allie mumbled.

I crooked my finger at Juniper.

She moved forward slowly at first, then lifted her chin and picked up the pace, coming through the door like it was just an average Sunday. If I wasn’t so mad at her, I would have grinned at the pure sass.

“Outside, now,” Allie snapped.

Juniper pursed her lips, then did as instructed. We followed the flow of traffic out of the building and into the parking lot. “If you’re going to yell, then just get it over with and yell.”

“The last thing you want is a piece of my temper,” Allie warned.

Juniper’s gaze dropped to the asphalt.

I looked over her head and locked eyes with Allie, giving her the choice to make the next move, more than ready to make it if she wanted.

“Bring her to my house. Now.” She turned, her ponytail swinging as she walked across the aisle to Anne’s Mercedes.

Juniper sighed and lifted her gaze to mine. “Are you going to yell?”

“I think I’ll let the professional handle this one.” The truck beeped as I unlocked it. “Get in. Because I love you, I’ll drive slowly, and if I were you, I’d spend every minute of the trip hoping she cools off before we get there.”