Why My Mate Cries
Chapter 87

ALIYAH’S POV

I was mostly quiet on our way home. Reid had noticed it, but instead of firing me with questions, he just joined me as I took the time to seize this brief period of peace, even though I knew it was temporary.

When we got home, the pack house was deafeningly quiet. My wolf, Kae, was jumping inside of me, totally happy by the fact that we were finally home. I knew I should be happy too, but I could not force myself to smile a bit. The moment we stepped into the pack house that taught me what family looked and felt like, the fatal feeling of being incomplete struck me.

No one welcomed us yet, and I was relieved by that. I knew I would not be able to smile at anyone right now. I could not be totally happy after all that happened in the Silver Moon pack… especially after what happened to our baby.

I was glad that Reid respected the peace I needed. Although we were alone in our bedroom, he didn’t urge me to answer the question regarding what he had missed while he was away.

How would he react once he found out that our baby was gone?

Instead of answering him, I told him, “I want to take a hot bath.”

“I will prepare the tub so we can bathe together,” he replied, after caressing my hair.

My chest was filled with a great deal of grief and worry. I wanted to cry… even breakdown because of the misfortune that happened, but all I could feel right now was the numbness in my body. It was as if I was so tired of everything.

“I haven’t apologized to you…” Reid uttered in his low, rough voice as he buried his face in my neck while we were on the bath rub. “I’m sorry for all I did, Aliyah. I know I’ve caused a lot of trouble.”

I was surprised to notice that my tears rolled down my cheeks after what he said. I gasped and continued to sob while I settled on top of his body, while we were both naked under the warm water, and while I took advantage this moment where I could burst out.

I just really needed to cry, and I badly needed this moment with him.

There was a time that I thought I was a strong woman because I’ve gone through abusive situations my whole life. Somehow, I believed that I could handle every bad situation, as in my point of view; I thought I had experienced the worst.

But those were just mere thoughts…

When the witch attacked me and purposely killed the baby in my womb, it felt as though someone had just dragged me into the depths of hell, and although I was thankful—even blessed—that Goddess Selene worked in her own way to let me be reunited with Reid, a big part of me was gone forever.

My dream of becoming a mother, and having a family I could call my own was shattered into tiny pieces… and Samarra did it.

I didn’t even know what I did wrong for her to do this to me. It was just so cruel of her to end an innocent baby’s life that deserved to see the world.

After a while, I mustered my courage to tell Reid the truth because he deserved to know what really happened, and how sorry I was for not being able to protect our baby.

“I have to apologize to you too, Reid…” My emotions welled up inside me that I had to pause and take a few deep breaths before I continued, “…I lost our baby.”

He let out a soft, yet painful whimper while his head remained on my neck.

Seconds later, he nodded his head. “I know… I… I already know…”

My lips trembled, and at the same time, my face made a frown at what he said. I checked over my shoulders, and met his teary eyes. “Y—You knew?”

Inhaling sharply, he nodded his head. “That witch boasted about it right before we killed her.” He cupped my face gently and continued, “I am aware of your pain, Aliyah, and you can share it with me. I don’t want you to suffer through this loss alone.”

I shivered at his genuine words, feeling the little bolts of excruciating pain running through me. My shoulders began to tremble as I cried loudly while I faced him.

“I—I’m sorry… I’m really sorry, Reid…” I told him between my sobs. “I—I should have been more careful. I should not have defied the witch. If only I knew that you were going to save me, I would’ve stayed still… This is entirely my fault. I’m sorry…”

“It isn’t your fault, Aliyah,” he uttered firmly. He leaned closer to k**s my tears away, but I only ended up crying more. “Don’t blame yourself, little wolf. Please, don’t…”

His tears rolled down his cheeks as he continued to soothe me. He cupped my face once more, and then pulled me into a tight hug. I cried on his chest, and he kept rubbing his hand up and down my arm to comfort me.

“Samarra took away my chance to become a mother… she f*****g took my baby away from me forever,” I continued to release my anger while crying in despair.

Reid did not say anything further, but rather kept soothing me. I wished I could also comfort him at this point, for I wasn’t just the one who lost someone. He did too. I wished I could be strong enough to tell him that we were going to be fine after this tragedy, but I wasn’t sure if I could really move past this.

“We ended the witch’s life. I assure you that she wouldn’t be able to hurt you, or anyone else,” Reid said firmly after a few minutes. “I’d put my life on line just to protect you, Aliyah…”

Moments later, Reid bathed me as I had already lost my strength to tend to myself. He put me down on the bed afterward, and then he prepared food for us to eat on the bedroom. After all that, we lay down on the bed, hugging each other.

With his comforting scent, I was able to sleep for a bit. However, no matter how I tried to take a rest, I would always wake up from a nightmare—a nightmare that replayed that event where Samarra used her power to hurt me and my baby. I forced myself awake and sat upright, screaming, and found Reid comforting me seconds later.

“Ssshh, I’m here… it’s okay. We’re going to be fine, Aliyah…”

However, the excruciating pain was so unbearable that I couldn’t convince myself that everything would be okay…

I can’t be okay…

“How long should I endure this, Reid?” I glanced up at him as I cried my heart out. “I don’t think I can live with this…”

“We have to keep going, Aliyah,” he reminded me in his firm, hurting voice. “We have to live. I—I know it’s difficult and I feel for you, but I assure you we can get through this, okay?”

Although I didn’t know where to start, I just nodded my head, and hugged him once again.