Wild West of the Heart
SEVENTY ONE

"Ben and Jax were very different people" Obi twirled his fingers nervously as he looked to Miss Coker instead of the class. She pointed to to them and Abdul to move forward.

His voice was low, and he was at least meters from his partner. "But somehow-" He cleared his throat. "Somehow they found each other, reinstating the fact that opposites do attract but never stick together" Obi read off the paper in his hands and Abdul let those sink deep into him.

"Is that "Miss Coker stepped forward as he kept quiet. "Is that all you took from that Amebo, Obi?" She called the name of the book and he was silent for one moment, giving Abdul time to continue.

"I think he's wrong" Abdul suddenly interfered. "A statement like that had nothing to do the main characters. I feel Ben and Jax were different people but that time with the way together-you know sometimes people do shitty things and never apologize for them. I think Jax sharing a kiss with Sam changed everything for me. And no matter how in the end, Ben forgave him. I feel it was what broke them apart and if that had never happened, they would still be together" Abdul narrated.

It took a moment for Obi to process his words but when he did, he squeezed the paper in his hands.

"Except Jax didn't kiss Sam. They never said it anywhere in the book. It was just rumors" Obi turned to Ab who let out a sheepish chuckle. "And rumors ruin relationships" He added.

"No" Abdul shook his head. "Lying does" He raised his voice back at Obi, giving the audience more than a narration, but a live action. And Miss Coker was intrigued the moment Abdul closed the book.

She loved to see when students argued about a book, disagreed about the choices of a character because it only meant that not only did they fully immerse themselves into reading, they also understood the character.

And Obi did more than that. He was the character.

He was Jax, trans and still making sense of his teenage years. Anxiety smitten, and falling in love with someone that hurt you so bad. He was Jax.

And one could say Abdul was Ben.

"And betrayal and dumb shit does ruin a relationship. Because it ruins trust, and there's nothing without trust. They were nothing without trust" They made it seem as if they were reading off a different book but these were the subtle plots that Reginald Ojo had put in his book.

Subtle plots that didn't seem so subtle on close inspection. And only if you knew him would you understand that he knew he hurt Jazzlyn when he left. Now, this wasn't a story of both of them.

It was just a character that was built off her. "The rumor did ruin both of them before anything else" Obi still stuck by his point. And Abdul shook his head, inching closer to him. "No-" He whispered. "They were ruined from the very beginning" He said, before walking back to his seat and leaving Obi standing there with tears in his eyes.

"But they were good friends in the end" Deborah piped up from the crowds. "I think maybe the story tells us maybe that was all they were ever meant to be" Her eyes looked to Fiyin who seemed to be in her own world and she looked back to Obi. "Good friends" She whispered, mostly to herself.

"Obi-" Miss Coker called his attention as he turned to the class. "I think the story can be interpreted in a million ways and that's the beauty of it" He pushed a lump down his throat.

"I think that's what the author wanted. To be able to start the most difficult conversations. And dawn on us the scariest realities, ones we may be too afraid to admit to ourselves. Maybe all they were ever meant to be were friends-" Obi paused, looking to Miss Coker and then to the class-

to that one particular person.

"But you can't tell me that the moments they shared together weren't real. Because you'd be lying to yourself" He walked a bit but then halted.

"And Abdul-" Obi wiped his eyes. "Jax did apologize, for everything" With that, he walked out of the class to the surprise on Miss Coker's face.

"That was..." She got cut off by the sound of the door and she climbed off the table. "Impressive as well" She commended. "That's be it for today" She added and the students sighed, Ayo being the first person on his way out. Fiyin had fallen asleep on her desk and Deb looked to her as she packed her books into her bag.

She reached to wake her up, but on second thought, she pulled away. Her shoulders deflated the moment she realized she was in a one-sided friendship where she always had to take care of someone that didn't rate her that much. She spent all her time caring for and loving someone that didn't quite love herself. Those were the most draining types of relationships. She knew at some point, she had to let it go, whether it was her silly crush on her or the fact that she did much.

Often times, too much.

Fiyin wasn't spiraling down this hole, she already had. And Deborah knew that there was nothing she could do if Fi kept lying to her. The only person that could bring her from that hole, was herself. Because she'd pushed everyone else away.

-

"Hey" Ola walked to match Obi's pace till he halted. "How was it? The presentation?" He asked.

Obi heaved a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I think it wasn't that bad" He replied with a half hearted smile on his lips.

Ola inched closer to him, nodding his head. "Oh" He exclaimed, bringing out a flyer from his pockets.

"You seen this?" He asked, desperate to strike a conversation with her best friend. "Yeah, the Spring Fling. It's next week" Obi narrowed one eye at him.

"And you're coming right?" Ola asked. He nodded. "You know i'd never miss a party" He let go of the flyer, taking Obi's hands. "Yeah me too-"

"We could use something to take our minds off of this. All this, and finally catch up" Obi still had that smile, nodding before he pulled away.

Perhaps this was Ola making amends but then he watched Obi walk away from him and it felt different. Until he halted, turning around to him.

"I never said this, i'm sorry for that day. You were right, about Nathaniel and all of it. You're always right Mide" He shrugged his shoulders. "Naa" He waved his hands in the air and Obi chuckled. "I'm sorry too" He whispered.

"Wanna hang later? Just us" He said and Ola threw his head backwards, letting out a sigh. "Got stuff to do" He said and Obi just pouted.

"Another time then-" "Another time" Ola said, pulling out his phone to stare at contact name. He looked up at Obi as he walked further away. And he realized before there was Obi, there was Williams. And he couldn't finish making his amends without reaching out to him, after months.

Obi walked to his locker, unsure of what he felt in that very moment. He couldn't tell but a part of him felt relief after talking to Abdul in the class. Or maybe it was the punch he gave Nathaniel-

-a medium he'd used to channel out all of his anger and frustration. Or maybe it was apologizing to Ola. There was just that smile as he ravaged through the back of his locker, hefting out some of the books he no longer used.

It was then his eyes caught something stuck in the back, it was a container of pills.

Now looking at it, Obi got a flashback to months ago when he thought these hormones would solve all of his problems. But each day he spent now, he'd spent growing into this new self.

He didn't know whether or not he wanted to detransition but for the first time, he felt exactly where he was supposed to be. He felt at the very midpoint and at the apex of his non-binaryness. He buried the pills between his books and tossed it into the trashcan next to him.

He threw his bags upon his shoulders after he closed the lockers, walking down the hallway he thought was empty.

-

Ola pushed the doors, a surprise waiting for him behind it. He halted, staring down the restless puppy before him. He looked up to his mother and Titi by the corridor and he let out a chuckle. "What is this?" He went down to his knees. "Your aunt Titi thought it was a good idea" She laughed as well, inching closer to her son. She bent forward and Ola looked at her. "I thought you didn't like dogs" He said and she shrugged his shoulders. "Little's man growing on me-" They shared a laugh as tears welled in Olamide's eyes.

He didn't think he'd ever seen his mother this happy, finally being as spontaneous as getting a dog with her sister. She was usually not that type of that person but it felt good now, watching her grow into this new person. Into her own narrative. Her story, outside of Akin.

They shared eye contact before Mary ruffled his hair. "I'm sorry" He mouthed and she tilted her head. Getting up, she looked to the oil that had smeared across her palms.

"You need a haircut" She'd replied him instead but smiling once she turned around. She made her way into the kitchen as Ola went upstairs. He had a smile over his lips as he dropped his bags to the floor. He sat on the bed, laid on it. And then got up to pace around it with the phone in his hands, still on that contact name. Williams. "Fuck" He cussed, running his hand through his hair. Mary was right, he did need a haircut. It had been months.

And he needed to look clean for the party next week.

After about an hour, contemplating whether to dial or not, he finally clicked the voicebox to record a message. And that smile wiped off his face when he got serious. His fingers drew lines across the sheets as he heaved a sigh- —as if it were a stranger he was talking to.

"Hey" He whispered. "Hey Will. It's Olamide" He finally brought himself to say those words. And pride filled his eyes as he fell back into his bed.

I think this was the calmest he'd felt in months.

But alas, all of that was about to change for the worse.

To be continued...