Wild West of the Heart
SEVENTY FOUR

Three days had passed since the night that changed everything. And no one was quite the same. Mira held the newspaper in her hands and looked to Silva. "Nothing yet?" She asked and he shook his head. "Nope-

Everything was falling apart, and everyone was drowning. So much so they had no idea of the people around them.

"People will read it. Soon" She reached for his frail hands and Silva stood, placing back her seats. "It's been two days. This was a bad idea" He replied before pulling away.

Mira just sat there, a copy in her hands as she bit into her fingernails. Closing her eyes, she muttered a prayer. But she wasn't the only one.

The nightly breeze had blown into his hair as Obi left his shoes on the river bank. The air blew open his vintage shirt that was unbuttoned to the very last. His khaki trousers were rolled up to his knee length as he heaved in a sigh. It was the second of March, the night that felt so unreal. All that flashed in his head were those photos of him and Abdul and the thought that everyone knew about him made him physically nauseous. What was worse were Abdul's words to him.

"I wish i never met you" Were the very ones that broke him. That feeling of his heart shattering stayed with him.

And after much thought as he walked with his shoes in his hands, bare feet against the concrete pavement, Obi thought he had nothing else to live for. So he made his way to the lagoon, the one where'd went to with Ola that time. There was this spiritual bond he had with the waters, it was only natural that he'd come here in such time that it seemed like his life was over. So there he was, as Ola ran around the school in search of him, he was here, walking into it. The water rose more and more as he walked further. He could hear the chirps of the bird above him, and it was surreal. He always nature, so he embraced the flusters of the water against his body. The winds had dried his tears against his face as he swung his arms in the motion.

He envisioned the waters as a shape, perhaps a heart that enveloped him inside. He was nothing but dust, and he was to return to that dust. And as much as he wasn't that religious, he found himself muttering a prayer-

-an apology to God, or whatever superior being inhabited the dark starlight skies above him, that he had tried. That he had really tried this time and that he was coming home.

That the moment he buried his head into the waters, that he'd be on his way. Ola fell back, floating on his back as the water carried him further. Then that thought struck him.

If he went through with this, he wasn't going up. His eyes were fixed on the magnificent skies- he wasn't going there. He knew what religion said about suicide. And as brutal as a judgment like that was, he couldn't imagine an afterlife in which he burned in fire.

He couldn't suffer in this life, and the next.

The times he'd imagined it, he imagined himself in a garden, or all those plantations at the end sequence of a movie. He imagined running into it, hands brushing against the leaves that bore the brightest of flowers.

As his body wedged against the rock, he began to slowly sink into the lagoon with his eyes open and chest closed. If he went through with this, there would be no flowers- there would be no running. No freedom.

He didn't think his life as enough reason to stay, nor his friends, Ola, Fiyin. Mira. But instead because of the mere thought of going to hell, he realized he couldn't do this.

He couldn't relieve himself of this pain only to suffer more.

So he floated back to the surface of the water, bursting through and coughing up water from his mouth and nose. His chest ached as he filled his lungs with air again. His fingers held unto the rock as he burst into tears. "Fuck-"

-

"What really happened?" Olamide's voice went low as he turned to face his mother. His eyes fell to her hands in his as Titi stood by the door, talking to the doctor.

Mary had tears in her eyes-it's been three days, yet she couldn't forget getting that call not long after he'd left.

"Is this Mariam Bankole?" The nurse had asked calmly as Mary stared to the table, the phone on loudspeaker. She cleared her throat before muttering a- "Yes" "It's about your husband. He's been a car accident?"

She could remember how her heart dropped when she heard. And to be honest, the past few days had been a blur. Up until the very moment she showed up the hospital, staring down on him in the intensive care unit. He'd been that way, still and unconscious since then.

And she, she had been beside him. Like she hadn't closed the door on him that night. She remained loyal and hopeful. She remained prayerful because as much as he'd done, she still hoped he would wake up and she would be there. "They told me he was in an accident. He swerved to avoid a bike but he ran into a tree by the side of the road. It was rainy and i guess he couldn't see" Mary looked back at him. "It's my fault. I shouldn't have sent him back knowing he was intoxicated. He was so different when he drank"

"No mum. This has nothing to do with him"

Titi murmured with the doctors before they pulled away from the ward. She still stood by the door, looking to Mary.

"You don't know that"

"Except i do. I knew something would happen. Something would always cause me to come back to him. I can't escape Akin. I swear i can't escape him" She whispered. "Look at him" She squeezed his palms. "How can i leave him now?" "Mary i told you countless of times. You have to choose you" Titi finally walked up to her. And Mary sobbed, allowing the tears fall from her eyes. "Choose myself?"

Those words echoed in Mide's ears before he stood up. He slipped his hands into his pockets and was headed to the door. Leaning behind it, he heaved a deep breath. He looked to his phone once he'd hefted it out to see no new notifications, not from Obi or Will.

He just hoped they both were okay, Obi especially and Ab.

It had been three days as well since Obi tried to kill himself, and that could say alot about the way he was coping with being outed to the entire school. Abdul on the other hand had not left his room for about a day and a half.

He rested his back against the walls, holding his pillow between his chin and he sobbed into it. He wanted to scream, so much that he'd lose his voice, so much that he would let out all out. He didn't think he would go back to that school until he did that.

The beeps rang in his ears as he held the phone to his ears. He couldn't talk to Obi, neither could he talk to his parents. So he called the one person that he could talk to-

His sister, Aaliyah.

"Hey Abu" She squealed into the phone and that alone made him chuckle, the sound of her shrill voice and that name she called him. She was the only one that ever called him that. The chuckle transitioned into a sobbing and once she'd noticed it, her voice went dead serious.

"Are you okay. Abu?"

The thing about a question like that is that it usually moves something inside of you. And he wiped beneath his eyes-

"Something terrible happened in school" He replied.

And she heaved a deep sigh. "What is it?" She asked and he wasn't even sure he wanted to tell her about it, because that would mean he'd tell as well that he was gay-

-that he fell in love with a boy, with the boy that came to her wedding. Obi. And he loved that feeling of love and being loved by him. He loved the moments before all of this year happened. Moments they would lie in bed and he would sleep over in Mira's home.

They would spend the whole night talking and making plans for the future. Unbeknownst to them, life had other plans, wickedly laughing in both their faces.

"You don't have to tell me in details Abu" She interrupted his thoughts and he sighed. "School can be terrible but you only have a few months left. Think of it that way" Aal said.

"Then you won't have to see all of these people ever again"

"Think of the good and the possibilities that await you once high school is over. And-" She paused. "It's pretty good out here. It does get better and if someone were to tell me months ago that i would be here, i'd probably laugh but here i am, Abu" She whispered to him.

"You just have to replace that one person that doesn't make life seem so bad" And the one person that came to his mind was Obi. Then he'd remembered all the terrible things he had said. And the thought of that made him cry the more. "Thank you" He muttered to his sister. "Anytime Abu-"

"I'm here for you anytime" She chuckled softly.

And if only Obi had someone who would tell him that, he wouldn't feel as bad. He wouldn't feel as numb as he was.

It was then Ola's eyes met with Fiyin's in the same hallway of the hospital and he arched his brows. "Ola?" She'd called, making her away across to him.

"Fiyin?"

"What are you doing here?" They chorused as her hands briskly rubbed his shoulders. "My " Fiyin pointed to the door behind her. "My father. He fell ill and i had to rush him here" Truth was, none of them had kept in touch since the night of Spring Fling. They each had their own things to deal with. This was sort of like rock bottom, or below.

"Same, Fi. Mine was in an accident that night. I can't even believe this" He ran his hand through his hair. This was the most words they'd said to each other in weeks.

She was sober, and clean. Except her hair took a more hungover shape and her eyes had sacks beneath them-Everything else was normal with her. And that was good.

"Do you want to-" She looked into his eyes. "Do you want to get a drink from the cafeteria or something?" She asked, pocketing her hands. "It's been a while" Ola chuckled, rubbing his eyes. "Yeah" He heaved out.

To be continued...